A3! Translation: Tenichi’s Improvised Manzai Show (Joke Planning Elaborately)
Ooo mixing it up and doing the SSR first this time oooo keeping you on your toes
Oh my god comedy is so SO fun to write, it’s so rewarding to get the joke and then feel like you’ve maybe made it work in English. The original JP of the manzai routine is honestly really really funny, so I hope I got even a fraction of that to come across here.
iirc, this one was provided by the lovely star @banriapologist ! Thank you!!
The translation is under the cut. If you see anything that doesn’t seem right, please let me know!
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1
Taichi: Ahaha, that duo was so funny just now!
Citron: They are a favorite to win the young manzai’s gateway to success, “King of Blooming.”
Tenma: The duo before them was funnier.
Taichi: I wanna see the next duo soon! I can’t wait for these commercials to end~
Izumi: I’m home.
Sakuya: Director, welcome home!
Taichi: Welcome home!
Izumi: Oh, perfect. You guys, are you interested in live comedy shows?
Tasuku: Live comedy shows?
Azuma: I’ve never been to one before.
Izumi: Well basically, earlier…
ー
Yuzo: I’m coming in.
Izumi: Yuzo-san! What can I do for you today?
Yuzo: I just happened to pass by on my way home from helping out an acquaintance’s troupe, so I thought I’d drop by here too.
Izumi: I see! Good work today.
Yuzo: Well, it’s not just to say hi. Here.
Izumi: Tickets to a live comedy show?
Yuzo: Yeah. Apparently someone in the troupe that I went to help out today has an acquaintance who’s making an appearance in this.
Izumi: I see. Huh, it’s being held at an event hall in the next town over.
Yuzo: I was planning to go since they were nice enough to give them to me, but unfortunately I’ve got other plans that day.
Yuzo: I can’t go, but I thought someone in this troupe could be able to.
Izumi: A comedy show, how nice! I bet this would be useful for our plays too.
Yuzo: Exactly. It could work as study for how to insert adlibs, or comedic plays.
Izumi: That’s true! Then, I’ll take you up on the offer and accept the tickets.
Yuzo: I wanted to see it too, but it is what it is. Let me know what you think, if you don’t mind.
Izumi: Alright!
ー
Izumi: –so that’s what happened.
Izumi: We’ve got some tickets, so I’m hoping there are people besides me who can go too.
Citron: A live comedy show, I wish to go!
Taichi: It sounds like fun!
Tasuku: Huh, I’m interested.
Izumi: It’s going to be on this day…
Azuma: Mmm… that might be a bit difficult for me.
Tasuku: I’ve got a guest appearance that day.
Citron: Ohh… this day is the day that I go to see kabuki.
Sakuya: It’s a shame, but I also have things to do…
Taichi: Ughh… it’s no good for me either…
Izumi: In the end, it’s really inconvenient, huh.
Tenma: …I’m free on that day.
Izumi: Really? If you’d like to, I hope we can go together.
Tenma: Are there still tickets?
Izumi: Yeah, I have some left.
Tenma: I’ll ask if any of the others can go.
Izumi: Really? Thank you, Tenma-kun!
ー
Izumi: Alright then, let’s have a good time today.
Tenma: Yeah.
Misumi: I’m excited to see a comedy show~
Muku: I’m looking forward to seeing a live comedy show too!
Kumon: Me too me too! I’m excited, this is kind of like a field trip~!
Yuki: I can’t believe the entire Summer Troupe was free.
Kazunari: Isn’t it great? A live comedy show with everyone!
Izumi: I think this’ll become a source of lots of acting tips, for things like getting a feel for the tempo and how to use pauses.
Tenma: Yeah. There could be something that we can incorporate into Summer Troupe’s comedic plays.
Kazunari: Alright, let’s go to the event hall right away ☆
ー
2
Yuki: Wow… it’s a bigger venue than I expected.
Tenma: There’s a lot of people here too.
Muku: I’m excited to see what sort of jokes they’re going to show us.
Kazunari: Ah, looks like there’s a list of the featured entertainers on the pamphlet we got earlier!
Izumi: It’s not just one duo, but a lot of them.
Misumi: I wonder if there’ll be a triangle entertainer~?
Tenma: What the heck is a triangle entertainer…
Muku: I’ve seen this person before!
Kumon: Awesome! They’ve been making appearances on TV a lot recently with their quick one-liners!
Yuki: I thought they were a solo act, but they were originally part of a duo?
Tenma: Huh? I’ve never seen this duo before.
Izumi: Ah, they’re a new face in manzai that just graduated from training school.
Misumi: What’s training school?
Izumi: It’s a school where you study comedy in depth.
Misumi: Ooh~! That sounds fun~!
Kazunari: I’m too excited, my tension is maxed out!
Entertainer A: I’m starting the impersonations now, so try to guess what I’m doing.
Entertainer A: Meow meooow.
Entertainer B: That cry is… a cat!
Entertainer A: Buzz. The correct answer was… a unpopular idol who thinks that imitating a cat will make her cute~
Entertainer B: That imitation is too specific! Would anyone figure something like that out!?
Kumon: Haha! It’s like Marshmugi!
Misumi: Whaaat!? It wasn’t a cat??
Kazunari: Dark-ish jokes can also be nice~
Yuki: That comeback just now… it could be easy to use as an adlib.
Izumi: Their sense of speed is just right too.
Tenma: Yeah, the timing was perfect.
〜
CHOOSE!
1. The tempo and pauses were really good.
Izumi: Their use of tempo and pauses was really good too.
Tenma: Especially with that routine just now, it seems like it’d work well for the Summer Troupe’s comical performances. It’d be fresh and exciting.
Tenma: Alright, when we get back let’s try incorporating this stuff into practice right away.
2. This is even better of a study reference than I had imagined.
Izumi: This is even better of a study reference than I had imagined.
Tenma: Definitely, when you watch it like this manzai and theater surprisingly have a lot in common.
Tenma: It’d be interesting to put on a play with a manzai theme too. Maybe we should borrow and study some DVDs on comedy too.
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Izumi: Heheh, I’m glad we came.
Tenma: Yeah. I’m looking forward to the next entertainer’s routine.
ー
Izumi: Just like that, it’s already half over, huh.
Tenma: The next duo is…
Tenma: Next is another young duo.
Kumon: What sort of acting style are they gonna use?
Muku: I’m looking forward to it!
Kazunari: Ah, looks like it’s starting!
Mozu: Hello~! I’m Kotaro Mozu! (1)
Esaka: I’m Kanade Esaka. Kanade and Kotaro.
Mozu and Esaka: Together the two of us are Kanako!
Esaka: It’s nice to meet you all.
Esaka: I said that thinking we would start right away, but lots of types of people came by today, huh.
Mozu: They did~! Looking out, I see young men and ladies of course, but also moms, dads, grandpas, grandmas, dogs…
Esaka: No no, there’s no dogs.
Mozu: That young man over there, what’s your name?
Audience Member: Um, it’s Inui.
Mozu: What? No joke!? There really is one! (2)
Esaka: There’s a dog here! Wait, why are YOU surprised!?
Kazunari: Haha, so it’s a routine that plays with the audience~
Yuki: Ugh… do your best to not make eye contact.
Misumi: It’s funny~!
Mozu: Aaah!!!
Esaka: Why did you suddenly shout… what’s wrong?
Mozu: O-Over there…!
Esaka: Uh huh, what?
Kumon: Isn’t he pointing at Tenma-san?
Tenma: Wh-! D-Don’t tell me he…
Mozu: There’s a suspicious person~!!!
Esaka: There really is… he’s wearing sunglasses even though we’re indoors. You’re right, that’s too suspicious.
Tenma: H-Huh!?
Kumon: Wait, Tenma-san!?
Izumi: Eh!?
Mozu: Oh! He’s standing up, what a nice suspicious person! Why don’t you come up here for a bit?
Tenma: M-Me?
Esaka: You’re the only one with the spotlight on you, arentcha bro? Everyone, let’s greet him with a round of applause~
Applause
Tenma: …I don’t really get it, but I’ll go for now.
Yuki: Eh? You’re really going up?
Muku: He went up…!
Mozu: Welcome, Mr. Hot Stuff!
Esaka: Hm? Doesn’t he have this aura about him? Can I ask what your job is?
Tenma: Uh…
Izumi: Tenma-kun!? Will he be ok…?
Misumi: Tenma…
Yuki: If he says anything like “actor,” it’s all over.
Kazunari: …
Kumon: Kazu-san!?
Muku: Where are you going, Kazu-kun!?
Kazunari: Now, now, leave this to me!
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3
Esaka: What’s up, bro?
Mozu: What’s this, what’s this! You jumping in at the last minute too, bro?
Kazunari: Heyo! His job, right? Actually, fresh out of VSC’s (3) 33rd generation, we make up the duo Tenichi! Nice to meetcha ☆
Tenma: What? What are you…
Esaka: Eh? We’re in the same graduating class!
Mozu: No way, are y’all in the same trade!?
Esaka: Alright, this is huge so please show us just a little bit of your routine.
Mozu: I definitely wanna see it too~ Anyone else wanna see Tenichi’s routine?
Applause
Tenma: *Sigh*... remember this later.
Kazunari: Tenten, you gotta have fun like this!
Mozu: Done setting up your routine, bros?
Tenma: Yeah.
Kazunari: Ready enou~gh.
Mozu: A surprise challenger from the outside appears. What sort of routine will they show us? I’m getting excited~!
Esaka: Without further ado, show us what you’ve got. Well then, go for it~
Applause
Tenma: Hello.
Kazunari: We’re Tenichi. Nice to meetcha!
Kazunari: C’mon Tenten, your tension’s so low! Let’s do our Tenten Tension Up shout together!
Tenma: Stop saying tentententen!
Kazunari: Alright, how many times did I say “ten” just now~?
Tenma: Huh!? Umm… Tenten, tension…
Kazunari: Speaking of which, I went to this great ice cream parlor recently. The salesperson’s tension was so totally maxed out!
Tenma: Hey, don’t suddenly change the subject. What sort of salesperson was it to leave that sort of impression?
Kazunari: I’ll do a quick reenactment, so follow my lead, Tenten. I’ll be the salesperson, and you be me!
Tenma: Wait! Why am I playing YOU?
Kazunari: Isn’t it easier to remake it that way?
Tenma: That makes no sense!
Kazunari: Alright then, here we go!
Kazunari: Welcome~! It’s hot today too, isn’t it? At a time like this, let’s eat ice cream and have a blast ☆
Tenma: L-Lit! No matter which ice cream I look at, it’s totally instablammable! This crackling candy ice cream is rainbow colored and adorbs~!
Tenma: I’m seriously getting hyped~!!
Kazunari: Hey, no, not even gyaru (4) talk like that these days.
Tenma: Don’t get all calm and collected!
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Tenma: –wouldn’t ever happen!
Kazunari and Tenma: Thank you very much!
Applause
Mozu: Considering it was thrown together at the last minute, you’re really getting laughs!
Esaka: One more big round of applause for our last minute heroes, Tenichi~
Applause
Mozu: Not bad at all, bros!
Tenma: W-Well, yeah.
Kazunari: Thanks!
Esaka: I have a feeling we’ll meet again someday.
Mozu: Next time, let’s meet at King of Blooming!
Esaka: That’s right, in the finals.
ー
Host: “This year’s King of Blooming has turned out to be a fierce battle too!”
Host: “Young manzai entertainers competed ruthlessly in this tournament… which duo will take the champion title!”
Citron: Wonderful! It is a very close match this year!
Taichi: In the end, it’s gotta be number 1!
Kumon: What!? It’s totally the last guys!
Banri: Not number 3?
Sakuya: I liked number 2… mnn, but number 1 was funny too…
Muku: They were all so funny, I can’t choose!
Tenma: Everyone’s getting excited.
Kazunari: Well, it IS~ the once-a-year battle to determine who’s the top dog of comedy!
Host: “I’ll announce the results!”
Host: “The winner of this year’s King of Blooming is…!”
Company Members: …
Host: “Number 2, Kanako!!!”
Applause
Citron: Ohh! This year it is Kanako!
Banri: Their dialogue was definitely great.
Tenma: Huh? Aren’t those guys…
Kazunari: Ah! They’re the guys who messed with Tenten at that live comedy show we went to the other day!
Host: “Congratulations on your victory! How are you feeling right now?”
Esaka: “Everyone, thank you so much for your support. We’re happy to have been able to win, but we aren’t satisfied yet.”
Mozu: “That’s right, our victory here isn’t enough! We have a rival that we must win against no matter what!”
Host: “Ohh! And that rival is…?”
Mozu: “They came to a live comedy show before–Tenichi! We absolutely must face them in the finals here!”
Esaka: “I’m looking forward to the day when we can face off~”
Tenma: Wh…!?
Banri: Wait a minute, is Tenichi…
Taichi: Whaat!? Tenchan, you know them!?
Citron: You two, leaving Citrun behind, what is the meaning of this!!
Sakuya: Since when were you comedians!?
Kumon: Kanako’s rival is Tenichi, that’s so awesome!
Muku: Oh my gosh, we could see something like that last live comedy show again!
Taichi: What happened at that live comedy show!?
Kazunari: Yooo! How about it? Are we going on King of Blooming??
Tenma: Obviously not!
STORY CLEAR
Notes
1-1. I don’t know if it’ll show at all, but the duo is speaking in the Kansai dialect. I’ve read that it’s a popular dialect among comedians for having a casual feel to it. The previous duo used it too, I believe.
1-2. Apparently it’s popular to translate it in a southern drawl? But tbh I felt that coming from me it would feel forced. They got one “y’all” as a treat.
2. One of the kanji in Inui (犬井) is the kanji for dog (犬).
3. Veludo Star Creation, most likely. It’s based on the actual comedy school, NSC.
4-1. Gyaru (ギャル) is a subculture of girl’s fashion characterized by trendy or nonconformist styles. It’s got a style of speech that mixes unique slang with a very casual tone.
4-2. If I were to localize this line, I’d probably go with “Hey, no, nobody talks like that anymore.”
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