sentient-forest-boy

[sentient-forest-boy]

get his ass

#aftg #tsc

[sentient-forest-boy]

Wymack is just picking up traumatized kids and being like ok is anyone else gonna father them?? and doesn't wait for an answer just carries them around forever even if they're french

#aftg

[sentient-forest-boy]

a bottom-tier autistic experience is being told throughout your entire childhood that you are just an overthinker when it comes to social situations and later finding out that your friends did, in fact, hate being around you and tried to communicate that through weird little hints

[sentient-forest-boy]

(voice of a man slowly losing his mind) does it ever strike you that the plot of aftg is moved by little acts of kindness kevin offered to people who never had any semblance of it before. loving riko when no one would, befriending jean in the nest and keeping him alive through debilitating amounts of trauma, telling andrew he was worth it in a dingy high school locker room, teaching neil every night even if he knew he was about to die

#aftg

[sentient-forest-boy]

twitter doesn’t disappoint

#aftg #tsc

[sentient-forest-boy]

You can take the apartheid out of South Africa but you can never take it out of a white South African

[sentient-forest-boy]

some of my favorite replies to this tweet. happy lesbian visibility week!

[sentient-forest-boy]

John Green wakes up every day and says I will embarrass myself online

[sentient-forest-boy]

[sentient-forest-boy]

#fma

[sentient-forest-boy]

anyway the actual point of fandom is to inspire each other. reading each other's fics and admiring each other's art and saying wow i love this and i feel something and i want to invoke this in other people, i want to write a sentence that feels like a meteor shower, i want to paint a kiss with such tenderness it makes you ache, i want to create something that someone else somewhere will see it and think oh, i need to do that too, right now. i am embracing being a corny cunt on main to say inspiring each other is one of the things humanity is best at and one of the things fandom is built for and i think that's beautiful

[sentient-forest-boy]

[gasp] and they were roommates.

(The death grip these disaster children have had on me since the very beginning)

#who was gonna tell me cassandra jean reads aftg #aftg #tsc

[sentient-forest-boy]

this meme is like 7 years old and still lives in my head rent free

#dungeon meshi

[sentient-forest-boy]

I cannot express how jarring it was after being raised by a "Porn Addiction Coach" to get into a relationship with a woman and come face to face with the fact that she did actually want me to sexually desire her.

Like, in Evangelical Purity Culture, male desire was basically poison. It was a threat. It was this constant temptation that would destroy everything. And even after leaving, in the sort of queer, feminist spaces i spend most of my time in that wasn't something that pretty much anyone was spending time actively dissuading me from feeling.

But my desire is good. It's not something that I'm being accepted in spite of. It's a positive thing. It's a bonus. Not even just vanilla stuff, all the stuff I'd convinced myself were these weird terrible desires that were shameful to have.

It honestly took me over a decade to fully accept that. To stop dissociating during sex and confront that I was, in fact, being a massive perv and that was fantastic and preferable and that I could accept that into my self-image without shame or self hatred.

But it's important to do. It's important to leave relationships that don't welcome that part of you. To know that your sexuality is valuable and valid and worth owning and celebrating. Because the alternative is just...not being. Either existing as yourself and repressing the part of your identity that is sexual or allowing that sexuality to exist but turning off your self while it does.

[sentient-forest-boy]

I feel I should specify when I talk about the vast majority of Israelis supporting this genocide it's not to call for violence of them or even to demonise them. It's to call attention to Israel having a genocidal education system which dehumanises Palestinians from the moment Israelis start school. Ilan Pappé did a study in 1994 of the Israeli education system and raised the alarm that it would raise a generation who are even worse than those who first colonised Palestine in 1948. We're seeing the truth of that now.

I raise this point because we're seeing this attempt by politicians and the media to claim that it's just Netanyahu who is to blame for this genocide and not a systematic problem that requires boycotting, divestments and sanctions to push them to correct. This lie is being pushed because they do not want to change the status quo which allows for Israel to steal Palestinian land and homes and keep Palestinians under military occupation.

[sentient-forest-boy]

this this this

[sentient-forest-boy]

thinking about how when you experience a lot of shame in your formative years (indirectly, directly, as abuse or just as an extant part of your environment) it becomes really difficult to be perceived by other people in general. the mere concept of someone watching me do anything, whether it's a totally normal activity or something unfamiliar of embarrassing, whether I'm working in an excel spreadsheet or being horny on main, it just makes my skin crawl and my brain turn to static because I cannot convince myself that it's okay to be seen and experienced. because to exist is to be ashamed and embarrassed of myself, whether I'm failing at something or not, because my instinctive reaction to anyone commenting on ANYTHING I'm doing is to crawl into a hole and die. it's such a bizarre and dehumanizing feeling to just not be able to exist without constantly thinking about how you are being Perceived. ceaseless watcher give me a god damn break.