sadbodytheory

[sadbodytheory]

In The In-between by Sierra DeMulder

We finally decided to leave each other. 

To throw in the towel as they say, which makes me think of our love as some

red-faced boxer, lips ballooning, eyes

disappearing inside themselves--or, as some laboring woman, belly round, heeing

and hawing, our love trying to push out

new life, and us, two scared nurses, dabbing away the sweat on her brow or cleaning

the blood from his busted lip. Our love:

not pregnant, no good left hook, but it did put up a hell of a fight. We chose

to forfeit, to finish it. Our love: some

shitty novel or a board game that just goes on and on forever—just end it!

Maybe it's an animal stuck down

by a car. I’ve heard deer make the most human of noises as they die—just

end it. The night we did, we slept

the kind of touchless sleep that follows a funeral. I woke midday to the sound

of stillness, nothing, and knew where

our love lives now. Our bodies refusing to rouse to a world bled of it.

Some part of us wanted to stay there,

in the in-between, where the baby isn’t a stillborn, where the deer runs off

into the meadow, where the boxer

just gets up punch after punch

and the rounds go on forever.

#poetry #woman poet #sierra demulder #in the in-between #contemporary poetry

[sadbodytheory]

Last night i cried for no discernible reason by Mira Gonzalez

last night i cried for no discernible reason in an apartment that doesn’t belong to me in front of a person who also doesn’t belong to me (because people can’t own other people)

i say that i don’t like owning things but i’m not sure if that’s entirely accurate

i used to only cry alone i have cried more in front of people in the last 6 months than in the last 5 years of my life combined probably…

crying seems funny, to me

i am on a very crowded train passing grand central station it is 9:01AM and i am officially late for work

i am late for work because i slept 15 minutes past my alarm then i had sex then i stopped for coffee

i am late to work every day when you’re an intern nobody cares what you do

the main thing I am learning at my internship is how to look busy when i’m not doing anything also, i am very good at making photocopies now and putting labels on things

today i got an email from a woman in human resources she was upset because i haven’t gone to any of the ‘intern events’ because the ‘intern events’ count as your lunch break and i want to eat lunch alone i have become very good at avoiding other interns

at 5pm i will take a crowded train to my second job at my second job i have learned how to answer phones and transfer calls to the appropriate extensions and smile at people and bring people coffee and call the car service and process fed ex packages

today my brother emailed me while having a good drug experience i want to have fun when i take drugs but it’s difficult, sometimes

also, i want to lose 20 pounds but i think that is an unrealistic goal considering i don’t exercise and my diet is terrible and i am unmotivated

i think i would like to go to mexico and just hang out for a while my dad says I have 50 cousins in mexico but i have never met them

would they let me leave work early if i got hit by a car but wasn’t seriously injured

#mira gonzalez #last night i cried for no discernible reason #new sincerity #poetry #poem #woman poet #i will never be beautiful enough to make us beautiful together