I have to carry on, but not without my ghosts.
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I know that you don’t want me here
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As someone who has been living with severe suicidal ideation my entire life I wanna tell you all something, you don’t have to stay alive for yourself. People will say it’s a bad idea to live for external things because they’re temporary, and it’s true living for yourself is ideal but if you’re not to that point yet that’s ok too.
I’ve lived for my dog for the past 4 years, before that I lived for my snakes, before that I lived for my cat. You can live for whatever needs you and whatever matters to you. Live for your best friend, live for your plants, live for your pets, live for your animal crossing town. Live for whatever keeps you alive and the day will come when you can live for yourself.
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I asked for death but instead I’m awake.
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Your sins will slowly plague you, until you die alone. You’re haunting yourself - and not me. You have to live with it.
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All I am is a dead reflection.
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Crave my heart and it’s beating in your hand.
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And nowhere else has ever felt like home - and I can't fall asleep when I'm lying here alone.
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If I tried to take everything in this world that reminded me of you - it would be so empty that fucking God himself would have to start again.
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I was stagnant - then you entered my life and held it in your hands.
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Shall I stay? Would it be a sin? If I can’t help falling in love with you.
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And if you go, I wanna go with you. And if you die, I wanna die with you. Take your hand and walk away.
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Sometimes goodbye is a second chance.
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Why is everything so heavy?
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I know I'm not the center of the universe - but you keep spinning round me just the same.
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I finally know what it means to have something I can call my own.
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Don't go just take me with you!
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