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personalitytypesconvs · 14 hours
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entj: I'm thinking about breaking up with my boyfriend.
isfp: finally.
entj: I'm going to tell him everything I think about him. he should be grateful, actually, 'cause I think he'll never meet a person as honest as me. I'm obviously too much for him. my personality's too strong for his. and I have different priorities now. he's a fly to me, nothing more.
isfp: I want to see his reply. man, I feel so involved in this relationship, I can't wait to see how it ends.
entj: I think you're more involved than me.
isfp: and more involved than him.
entj: you're the only one in this relationship.
isfp: lol. anyway, my boyfriend just sent me a picture of himself and he's so cute!
entj: there are two types of relationship.
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entp: *texts first but stops replying after a while*
entj: am I bothering you?
entp: yes.
entj: ah.
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isfp: *casually mentioning a disturbing and traumatising memory from her childhood*
entj: have you ever considered a therapist?
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intj: this relationship isn't working, is it?
entj: nah.
intj: it feels like it doesn't have any meaning.
entj: and in the long term, it won't satisfy us.
intj: so, we end it here?
entj: yes.
intj: okay, goodbye.
entj: bye.
isfp: what just happened
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*entp, intj and entj are walking at night on a street outside the town, they walk pass a trash can*
entj: *hears a knock on the trash can* entp, stop.
entp: ?
entj: *hears another knock after a couple of seconds* entp!
entp: I swear I'm not doing anything.
intj: it comes from inside the can.
entj: inside?
entp: wait, let me look. oh wait, there's something in a plastic bag that's moving!
entj: what is it?
entp: I don't know. it could be a fish.
intj: a fish?
entj: is there some water around here?
intj: there's a river nearby.
entj: oh, entp, take the bag and let's take the fish to the river before it drowns.
entp: *takes a stick from the ground to take out the bag*
intj: wait, is that a fish?
entj: I think so. what could it be?
entp: okay, I'm having second thoughts. I don't think that's a fish.
entj: why not? *gets closer, there's something slimy and LONG in the bag* oh, fuck.
entp: what???
intj: it's a snake.
entp: OH MY GOD *throws the bag away*
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entp: you know, you always feel so distant from me. I don't like this part of your personality, and I think I'll never accept it. if we want this relationship to last, we got to work on ourselves.
entj:
entp: oh, by the way I cheated on you with my ex 🥰
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*during a fight, on the phone*
entp: *completely drunk* I don't want to fight anymore, I love you.
entj: 😐
esfp: *hearing the conversation* isn't this the first time he tells you that?
entj: 😦
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*enfj leaves the house*
*after 10 minutes, in the group chat*
enfj: I got lost.
entj: already??
esfp: how.
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infp (esfp's boyfriend): I wish my partner was more like yours.
entp (entj's boyfriend): you don't. believe me.
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enfp: you're really short, you know?
esfp: well, at least I have a boyfriend.
enfp: well, at least I don't have to hide the fact that I've cheated on him several times.
entj: damn.
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*esfp and enfp are making out*
esfp: *stops and looks at entj in the eyes* do you want some too?
entj: w-well...
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*entj adopts a guinea pig*
entj: *sends photo to isfp*
isfp: oh my god, I'll show him to my boyfriend.
*in their chat*
entp (isfp's boyfriend): whose hamster is that?
isfp: entj's. and it's a guinea pig!
*in isfp and entj's chat*
entj: wait, let me show him to my ex too.
*in the other chat*
entp (entj's ex): did you start breeding hamsters?
entj: what the fuck, entp. and it's a guinea pig.
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*in a park, at night*
entj: where's esfp?
isfp: *points behind a bush, where esfp and infp are... you know*
intj: where's enfp?
entj: oh, swimming in the fountain with a duck.
isfp and intj: oh, okay.
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*entp and entj are talking to each other*
enfp: *takes away entj* I need to tell you something.
*outside*
entj: so?
isfp: we just wanted to go to another club.
entj: oh, okay. let me tell entp-
enfp: you'll tell him later.
*entj, enfp and isfp go to the other club. entj receives a text from entp*
entp: if you didn't want to stay with me tonight, you could've just said so, you know?
entj: I did. enfp took me away to tell me something.
entp: you could've stopped her. I'm still in here. I'll wait for you?
entj: oh, no. we went to another place. can you guys come here?
entp: oh, really? what do you think I am, a dog? do I have to follow you like a puppy?
*entj, furious, leaves the club, walks alone for 10 minutes to reach entp*
entj: *in front of everyone in the club* enfp told me she had to tell me something. I wanted to let you know, but I literally didn't know how to handle the situation. and don't you dare disrespecting me again, are we clear?
entp: oh... yeah, hahah, didn't expect you to react this way. wanna have sex?
entj: yes.
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esfj: do you know how to read tarots?
entj: no, not really.
esfj: oh, yeah. it's because you're a taurus.
entj: ???
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esfj: hey, I need you to come over tomorrow, I need your help.
estj: I'd really love to, but I don't think I can make it.
esfj: what's the reason?
estj: *replying after 2 hours* my car broke.
*in another chat, with entj*
entj: he definitely did it on purpose.
esfj: like, he broke his car on purpose?
entj: yes.
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istj: *sends photo of a dead plant in a pot, sarcastic* since you're the expert... do you think it's still savable?
entj: *sarcastic as well* maybe just a little more water. you're speaking to a person who has never killed a plant in their life.
istj: *sarcastic* I can trust you, then.
entj: seriously, though. I've killed every single plant. the only one that's still alive has developed a rare illness.
istj: rare? then you should be proud.
entj: I am.
*30 minutes later*
istj: it's dead, 100%.
entj: why?
istj: my roommate hit it. it fell out the window. just the plant, the pot is still here.
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