oneamgirl

[oneamgirl]

I never thought the sound of an alarm clock would ever make me cry.

It was as if we were in our home back in El Jadida, my room was messy and she was walking straight towards it and I was walking behind her. Before she could say anything I told her that she shouldn't worry about my room and that I would clean it soon, if she could clean my older brother's room it would be better ( since he always dealt with mental health problems). We went to his room which was just right after you passed by mine. She started cleaning plates and food leftovers. Then my dad came into the picture.. nagging as always... He told her, "You really made him sardines for breakfast? No wonder he was mad" or something along those lines... I didn't remember correctly what he was nagging about but I remember it was food-related and something about sardines... Then suddenly I lifted my head and looked at Mom, it was as if I knew something was wrong about the whole situation and I kept looking at Mom and then I told them... "Wait mom is here!" and then I reached to her trying to touch her to make sure she was really here not just me dreaming or something because at this point everything felt extra real. I reached to her and I touched her and she didn't fade away and I was in awe, I told Dad "What happened ?? Mom came back??" no one answered me. Suddenly I jumped onto her lap while she was sitting and I hugged her so tightly and I told her: "Why can I touch you Mom? Is it because my time is getting closer? Is it because I'm going to join you soon? and she said don't say that Imane.." and I kept on hugging her as tightly as I could until the alarm clock ranged and this is the first time ever the sound of an alarm clock made me cry.

In a way... I didn't mind the feeling of being able to touch her even if it meant that my time might come sooner.. I really miss her to the point that I wouldn't mind joining her I guess... I never thought about it or felt this way about it before... I really really miss her although it doesn't feel like it on a daily basis, I guess I bury those feelings really well...

#dealing with grief #i miss my mom #stages of grief #grief/mourning #grief #grieving #grief journal #loss #tw grief #mom loss

[oneamgirl]

BINGO 🎯🎯🎯

[oneamgirl]

[oneamgirl]

[oneamgirl]

“god is not watching / do what you must!”

[oneamgirl]

ANN DEMEULEMEESTER SS24 B/S PHOTOGRAPHY: NICOLA BORTOLETTO

[oneamgirl]

[oneamgirl]

Tracey Emin. while executing Exorcism of the Last Painting I Ever-Made,1996.

Image courtesy of Christies

[oneamgirl]

[oneamgirl]

requested by greenslime69

[oneamgirl]

[oneamgirl]

[oneamgirl]

[oneamgirl]

Ergo Proxy - 16

[oneamgirl]

[oneamgirl]

Scars on your body show that you have lived; scars on your heart show that you have loved.

Nina Dul

[oneamgirl]

Harley Quinn #22 - "The Door" (2023)

written by Gretchen Felker-Martin art by Hayden Sherman