nindorkfish

[nindorkfish]

tbh i didnt know you were supposed to be jerking off while you look at porn

#cracking up

[nindorkfish]

That fuckin picture of that guy at agraveyard holdin like, a cup or smt, with a mothman sized moth with him, both staring directly at the camera is somehow the funniest image but I haven’t been able to find it in months

#mr grips #moth

[nindorkfish]

not now mom i’m wasting my life on a website the entire internet believes to be dead

[nindorkfish]

youre telling me a ham fisted this metaphor??

#cracking up #good puns

[nindorkfish]

I recently had surgery, and at the time I came home, I had both my cat and one of my grandma's cats staying with me.

- Within hours of surgery, I wake up from a nap to my cat gently sniffing at my incisions with great alarm.

- I was not allowed to shower the first day after surgery, and the cats, seeing that The Large Cat is not observing its cleaning ritual, decided I must be gravely disabled and compensated by licking all the exposed skin on my arms, face, and legs.

- I currently have to sleep with a pillow over my abdomen because my cat insists on climbing on top of me and covering my incisions with her body while I sleep (which is very sweet but not exactly comfortable without the pillow). She also lays across me facing my bedroom door, presumably on guard for attackers who may try to harm me while I'm sleeping and injured.

That's love. 🐈‍⬛🐈❤️

#cats

[nindorkfish]

when i was a kid i had moments of being so fucking diabolical because i realized at some point the best way to leverage power over my family was to do shit that would make everybody late

#cracking up

[nindorkfish]

how come when you turn into an adult people don't tuck you in anymore. if you have roommates you should offer to tuck them in sometimes. I really don't know why tucking people in stopped happening but we can bring it back

#cracking up

[nindorkfish]

so you think you can stone miette and spit in miette’s eye?? so you think you can love miette and leave miette to DIE?? oh mother!! can’t do this to me mother!!!

[nindorkfish]

i really like looking at google image searches for “firemen rescuing cats” or something because you get super cute pictures like

AND THEN THERE’S THIS ONE

[nindorkfish]

JUST FUCKING LISTEN. 

THIS IS HALLOWEEN BUT NOT LIKE YOU KNOW IT

reblog so others can hear it!

#this is halloween #music #string quartet #vitamin string quartet

[nindorkfish]

I am doing up some hoagie rolls and I haven’t baked in awhile. It’s scary! Wish me luck!

#baking #hoagies #sometimes you get scared #that you’re going to be bad at a thing you haven’t done in awhile #I guess this is anxiety? #fuck this crap #imma do it anyway

[nindorkfish]

@illicitfifths

#going to go see mozart tonight #so this gets extra points for timing

[nindorkfish]

#animals

[nindorkfish]

there’s avatar and then there’s the blue people movie

[nindorkfish]

the fact that house and wilson rode off into the sunset together is one of my greatest sources of happiness

the fact that house and wilson rode off into the sunset together to face a future of cancer-ridden pain is one of my greatest sources of sadness

#cracking up #house

[nindorkfish]

*Laois enters the chat*

#awesome #did you make this #do you take commissions #just kidding #unless

[nindorkfish]

Handmade sushi:

¿Hay hambre?

#sushi