[…] - Fady Joudah
And out of nowhere a girl receives an ovation
from her rescuers,
all men
on their knees and bellies
clearing the man-made rubble
with their bare hands,
disfigured by dust
into ghosts.
All disasters are natural
including this one
because humans are natural.
The rescuers tell her
she's incredible, powerful,
and for a split second, before the weight
of her family's disappearance
sinks her, she smiles,
like a child
who lived for seven years above ground
receiving praise.
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diogenes tries to forget by Mary Karr
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"[…]" - Fady Joudah
Still they ask in podcast
and electronic ink: How are you doing?
And they keep you in their hearts, pump you
to their minds, circulate you unimagined.
Take all the space you need, they say,
empathy loves the damaged.
You offer no solutions. Only clarity
they don’t believe, only they
get to tell the future
what to be.
Then they pump you
into their viscera, and feel you
bilious, ineffable, cast iron, butterfly.
Their questions like a shovel
that doesn’t know what earth is,
but digging anyway.
They hope you would say:
“I am multigenerational
and can fracture natural
bonds in my DNA,”
for this they can sell
to a tycoon press, a Carnegie
of thought dissemination.
And your answer comes:
“Things are a seasickness
and no land in sight.
Your peeping is no witness.”
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"Adult Acne" - Noah Arhm Choi
Because puberty can be confusing,
god made acne to give you one thing
to be sure to hate, to hide, to blame for the dim lights
and sticky shirts and showers mid-day. They warned me
testosterone could do this. Diabetes. Heart problems.
Anger like a rock inside a clump of snow.
The only time my grandmother touched my mother
was praying over her womb, saying boy boy boy when really
she meant history history history. The only time
she brought her food was the red ginseng, the bitter melon
as if a full mouth always gives you what you want.
Everytime my mother tells my birth story it changes.
A crucifix showing up in a dream, a dream of her boy running
through the field, an altar of ocean rock, mugwort,
one blue shoe. When I arrived and the doctor yelled yeoja,
not a boy, my grandmother walked out of the room.
To arrive then is to let your name be plucked
from a stem while the other leaves die. Grandmother
died without forgiving my mother for never
bearing sons, two years before I look up adult acne
and grindr dates with lights off
and what insurance lets you arrive changed
instead of changing while everyone can see and ask
you stupid questions forgetting they too
have access to google. God was slow to birth
language that could be a mirror
or a car to drive home in, so I arrive late and out
of breath, driving only a little over the speed limit
towards a skyline that could be everything
I’ve ever wanted, everything my mother was afraid to name.
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"Second Sight" - Danusha Laméris
Back then, it freaked my friends out I knew things
I had no way of knowing, like that the 680 East
would be closed the next day, a trip to Tahoe, cancelled.
Or how I called my boyfriend the night before the giant quake,
told him Something big is going to happen tomorrow. And
when it hit, I was in the open field everyone else was running to,
watching at a distance as windows cracked, chunks of glass
falling to the ground. What’s next? they’d ask, as if I’d know
or as if knowing would do any good, the world still coming down
around us: children kidnapped from the corner store, poison
in the water, planes shot from the sky. So when I dreamt
my parents’ house exploded, I hoped it was a metaphor
but a week later a fire climbed the dry scrub uphill
and torched the gas lines. My family got out but lost
almost everything: photographs, Christmas ornaments,
my grandmother’s gold. Though the gift of seeing is
something I think I got from her, my mother’s mother,
if such a thing can be passed down. A rogue strand of DNA
slipped into the chain, a code for here’s what’s coming,
for beware. Useless, maybe. Or maybe the way our line
survived, a pantry full of extra stores, an escape route
cut through the underbrush, a knife at the ready.
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"Out of the Sun" - Hsien Min Toh
A late friend’s grandfather used to tell stories
of being tailgunner on a B-17 flying missions
over Dresden or Cologne, before the disease
clouded his mind. He told of being crammed
into a tiny closet at the arse-end of the plane,
where pins and needles were companions, but
at least he wasn’t Cecil the top turret gunner,
who every so often had to glance into the sun
to try to have the earliest possible warning of
a Messerschmitt or Focke-Wulf seeking to rip
a talon of bullets into the fuselage. One time
Cecil certainly saved the crew by opening fire
on a suspicious sunspot at the precise moment
a first volley like rain splattered on the wings,
and maybe he got lucky but the Focke-Wulf
banked away and fled with a grey silk thread
issuing from its engine. But his friend Cecil,
despite standard issue sunshades, messed up
his vision. He saw spots even in the barracks,
and never made the squadron’s softball team
even with the ever-changing pool of players.
Eventually, he went blind at the age of eighty,
and said the only thing he could still see was
an image of the sun and occasional shadows
weaving for position around it. I don’t visit
my late friend’s grandfather these days, and
Cecil has now passed on, but I think of them
and wonder how much of that focus we apply
injures us in ways we cannot see until we do,
the raptor swooping out of the sun to strike.
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"Women love me, fish fear me" - Jordan Hamel
Life’s too short to eat bowfin, or that minced
pollock they batter and call Filet-O-Fish,
or the dolphins that get swept up in tuna nets
poached in a mercury brine. I often dream
of the creature from The Shape of Water, I bet
he tastes amazing with vinegar. I’m sorry. The wife
is making us go vegetarian, I’m trying, but it’s not easy.
I’ve been trawling this shoreline for centuries,
just me and my rod and my net and my
two large sons, roughhousing in the dingy
instead of learning how to properly rig
a double sliding sinker line with frozen squid chunks.
You try to teach kids the little things in this life;
you try to show them how seaweed slips through
sand and snags on rocks, how light refracts
on the water when dawn opens her eyes,
how to gut a 10 lb. snapper ass to mouth
without tainting the meat. But the youth
don’t know what they don’t know until it’s too late.
I am a decent man. I tell myself this often.
I emerged fully formed from a sea of good men.
I don’t know if god exists but if he does
I know where he’d spend his Sunday mornings.
The wife jokes that I move through life
with a bucket of bait in one hand
and a beer in the other, all smiles and salt breath
and tall tales for anyone who will listen.
She says I should slow down, take a second,
breathe. I’m not as young as I once was,
but I still have so much love to give.
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"My Brother Stole Every Spoon in the House" - Steven Espada Dawson
so we don't eat soup anymore. We tried. The bone
broth fell right through our forks,
our fingers, stained
the carpets. We all learned to speak twelve languages
but only the words for good morning
and hospital.
In Old Norse my mom learns the phrase where
are all the fucking spoons. Brian went outside, whispered
swears to the poplars.
They bent their necks to hear him.
Brian went outside
and left forever, took the rest
of the silverware. Brian went outside and left
a thousand doodles he drew,
every happy animal
that wasn't him. We crumpled them like origami
roadkill. Stomped them under our feet until
they became wine between our toes.
We're still drinking it now,
ten years later. I don't know how
magnets work. If I tied a million together, could they
pull him here?
The cutlery turned
ash in his pockets.
That heavy metal in his blood.
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"Flip Side" - Mónica de la Torre
In October, transmissions paused temporarily in certain regions of the planet.
No marks made it to the page then, hence the retroactive declaratives.
If you looked up at the yellow dwarf star at the right time in the right place,
you’d see the culprits, sunspots, sitting there available to the naked eye
and readily confused with muscae volitantes, a.k.a. floaters, where loops
of magnetic field in the sun’s photosphere find their footpoints and launch
themselves out to its atmosphere—its corona—tracing arcs of light
so beauteous their optimization as screen savers is likely a fait accompli.
Set them to Vangelis and they make for even better ambience. The sun's
on its twenty-fifth eleven-year cycle, manifesting as alternating bouts
of languor and hyperactivity visible in the number of blemishes. News
has it that late in the month the sun had an outburst, hurling plasma
and highly energetic particles our way. Its mass ejection supercharged
the northern lights I've never seen and caused a brief radio blackout across
Earth's daylit side, centered somewhere in the South American vastness.
Whether is all connects or this is another instance of word magic falls beyond
this account's purview, this side of paranormal. Face the sun.
Close your eyes. What do you see.
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[While everyone was in the hut I wandered out into the night.] - William Letford
While everyone was in the hut I wandered out into the night. A full moon. The more you know about the universe, the smaller you feel. But the moon somehow seems closer now. Solid and steady. The fact that it’s barren is a comfort.
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"This Too Shall Pass" - Kim Addonizio
was no consolation to the woman
whose husband was strung out on opioids.
Gone to a better place: useless and suspect intel
for the couple at their daughter’s funeral
though there are better places to be
than a freezing church in February, standing
before a casket with a princess motif.
Some moments can’t be eased
and it’s no good offering clichés like stale
meat to a tiger with a taste for human suffering.
When I hear the word miracle I want to throw up
on a platter of deviled eggs. Everything happens
for a reason: more good tidings someone will try
to trepan your skull to insert. When fire
inhales your house, you don’t care what the haiku says
about seeing the rising moon. You want
an avalanche to bury you. You want to lie down
under a slab of snow, dumb as a jarred
sideshow embryo. What a circus.
The tents dismantled, the train moving on,
always moving, starting slow and gaining speed,
taking you where you never wanted to go.
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Palestinian poet, Mahmoud Darwish
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"The Oriental and the Hummingbird at the Trailer Park" - Joan Kwon Glass
My eighty-year-old Korean mother bought a trailer
in a 55+ Florida trailer park. She has always seemed more
comfortable around white folks than other Koreans,
delights in their abundance of potato salad and poke cake,
appreciates that so many of their children did not
go to Yale or Harvard, is awed by and basks
in all of their shameless, American imperfections.
When she came home from a six-week stay and I asked
her So, how was it, her face lit up— Oh! I was the only Oriental,
so they just loved me! My mother, an adorable curiosity.
So small, so precious. Something to behold.
Unbeknownst to her, I too have a trailer park story.
When I was fourteen, I got wasted and then tripped
on acid for the first time. My friend Ondine and I
drove down to the trailers off Woodward, past
Six Mile Road, looking for pot. I was five the first time
someone I loved called me a chink. Twelve the first
time a grown man said he loved me then shoved his
tongue down my throat. Maybe that's why I am
always desperate to stray from whatever flock
I am told I belong to, wander instead
to those who see me but keep their distance,
those who do not care that I can only fly
backwards. I got my first tattoo that night
on someone's bed—a hummingbird on my right ankle—
a choice I was too drunk to remember making.
He held the tender bulb of my heel in his hand
like an offering while everyone else watched.
Hummingbirds don't migrate in flocks, choosing,
rather, to travel hundreds of miles on their own.
When they find each other, they are called a glittering,
a shimmer, a hover. My mother is home
and I meet her at the door so she can watch me
retreat, hum my wings so fast I can almost
hide behind my own heartbeat.
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"Revelation" - Zaynab Bobi
When the doctor said to your mother,
She walked out of the clock
I painted three scenes:
First, your breath went anti-clockwise: the hour
hand walking backwards until it was swallowed by time.
Second, you crossed out of time with the minute hand
stuck between your teeth — night had slipped into your mouth.
Third, you drained your mother's chest and poured
yourself into it; swinging back and forth begging for gravity.
Pain, too, is a child.
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"Quick Flesh" - Hilary Plum
She moves from farm to town bringing
only daughters. The call of dough thrown
to hot stone. In the butcher's shop she loses
only two fingers, while the vacant
farmhouse on whose porch I was never
pictured vanished. There's little the rich
won't harvest. Wind threshes only an orchard,
in the womb a child burgeons. In the hospital
mother holds the hand of father's body,
which takes two weeks to release the dose
of radiation it may release while alive.
Daughters bear daughters, a dark roof to
the orchard's mouth. There's a sound caught
like a soft piece of lung or a phrase in the old
language for a hand hot on the back,
the back to another cold wall. Across state
lines you followed, quick stitching of an
organ to itself. In town she lost only
one religion. Other daughters watch,
sewing butter to butter. This is the bread
of the body not left for coyotes
and it was birds I first
no longer heard.
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"My Father Walks Out of an English Book and Into an English Field" - Supritha Rajan
It was not long after the war—
and just saying after the war places him
in history, the one that counts
the progress of time as seismic
shifts, as the partitioning of before
and after, as if history unfurls
a taut chain that surveys the distance
from one point on the landscape
to the boundary of another
while everything else falls to the side
like small pebbles along a rock-face
bound to nothing but the abyss
of unrecorded intimacies, dark and spacious
as those tunnels the imagination builds
from pools of ink. My father leans
over a page, his brown hand
bound to the binding of a book
and the book a white fog from which
steps forth a man wandering alone
along a country path and walking, walking
all day long the endless length of a field
in search of what the resistance of a wind alone
could teach him—the type of man who,
possessed by vagrant passions, becomes the man
he reads about in a book, and so is also
my father standing up from a twin cot
in a small room with an even smaller suitcase
and wandering into a field he walks all day long
against a wind that smells of the Welsh sea
until weak-kneed and parched with thirst
he stops for water in a churchyard.
This is before I am a point of view
in history, before he becomes a household
bound, like any man, to that war between
self-clouding sorrow and vague ambition.
It is the month of Chaitra. The beginning
of a new year. Everywhere in the field
fluttering around him, nameless as the impulse
that first led him here, the bright and strange
crowd of yellow flowers called daffodils.
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"The Goal" - Cole Swensen
The goal of life is happiness (Agnes Martin); the word happiness shares the root hap with happenstance, haphazard and, simply, happen. I once had a friend named Happy—we worked for years at a restaurant together, and once during a slow moment, he took my Maybelline eyeliner pencil—warm brown—and with that alone, made up my eyes, creating amazing nuances, subtleties, new depths and contours. Neither they nor I had ever before (nor ever have since) been so beautiful. Chatting, as one does with someone who's immobilized you by working on your body, I happened to ask him about his name, what it meant; he said it means that I'm occurring right now.
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