mellomaia

[mellomaia]

I need people to stop glorifying the 4B movement in Korea, from a Western (white) perspective. Stop it. If you are blissfully unaware of this (having not been on TikTok) - in theory, it makes sense. No sex with men, no dating men, no child rearing with men, and no marriage with men. But. BUT. Feminists in Korea are problematic AF. I know this from both personal experience (having been on the receiving end of their ire online) and everything I've read about them, in Korean. I see all these white TikTokers (and even some in the Korean diaspora) fawning over how "we" in the US need this and, no. If your feminism is transphobic, hates gay men, hates men in general, that's not the feminism I'd endorse. Why is Korean feminism transphobic? In 2020, Korean feminists ACTIVELY CAMPAIGNED AGAINST a woman who was accepted to Sookmyung University. An all womens' university. But she was a woman, you say. What could be their problem? According to Korean feminists, they didn't want a "man" in their space. Because she is a trans woman. This is not unusual for Korean feminists. Having lived there for 5 years, to some extent, I understand their anger against misogyny. But if you are truly against the toxic patriarchy that exists in Korea, you must also help dismantle military conscription because that is where a lot of men become radicalized, bullied, etc etc and "grow up" to be the most toxic form of men seen on this earth. But Korean feminists don't give AF about that and in fact, I've read a lot of them express that it's good for men to suffer. Guess what? That view is internalized misogyny and toxic patriarchy, too. And I don't want to hear it about the movement being so "young". Korean women have stepped up to the plate before in our history. We are capable of better than this fucking nonsense. It's a bunch of transphobic, gay hating radicals that have hijacked what was supposed to be about social justice. WOMAD (link is to the Wikipedia article, not their site) and Megalia are the two sites they stem from. It is the most toxic group of people I've ever had the displeasure to encounter online. Any form of criticism is, at best, ignored and worst - I've been "called out" for being Korean-American, and therefore, to "butt out" of "Korean issues". Amongst other bullying I've personally received. And yes, not just on forums but on public articles that I've commented on.

I know it's a catchy title and it appeals in theory but please, please do not glorify these transphobes and TERFs. They don't deserve your attention.

[mellomaia]

Every “Why my disability didn’t stop me from living” article written can be summarized as having access to resources materially and socially.  Which results in a fascinating intersection between ableism and classism, as the resulting inspiration porn - used against disabled folk via the “Why are you more impacted than this person in the article” - essentially boils down to shaming people for not having access to the resources required to mitigate the disability. 

[mellomaia]

Watching my toddler figure out how to language is fascinating. Yesterday we were stumped when he kept insisting there was a “Lego winner” behind his bookshelf - it turned out to be a little Lego trophy cup. Not knowing the word for “trophy”, he’d extrapolated a word for “thing you can win”. And then, just now, he held up his empty milk container and said, “Mummy? It’s not rubbish. It’s allowed to be a bottle.” - meaning, effectively, “I want this. Don’t throw it away.” But to an adult ear, there’s something quite lovely about “it’s allowed to be a bottle,” as if we’re acknowledging that the object is entitled to keep its title even in the absence of the original function.

[mellomaia]

Another thing is that when this aggression started, we were so worried about winter and how displaced people in tents will survive it. Earlier this week the temperature in Gaza hit 38 degrees (100 Fahrenheit) and we are now wondering how will displaced people survive the heat in those tents.

[mellomaia]

🇵🇸 the University of New Mexico is camping for for a free Palestine!! 🇵🇸

[mellomaia]

saw a sign that said "honor aaron bushnell, free palestine" and man. why don't we honor the 40,000+ palestinians martyred in the last 200+ days. why don't we honor the palestinians who israel has maassacred in the last 75+ years. why don't we honor the palestinian villages wiped off the map. why don't we honor the entire lineages whom israel murdered. idk maybe yall need to think about why it took a white man self immolating for you to care about palestine!

[mellomaia]

[ID: tweet from @/1Schoolhouse from 8:33 pm on October 1, 2022 that reads, "Being autistic is asking clarifying questions and being interpreted as insulting when you're literally so confused." The words "so confused" are in all capital letters for emphasis. end ID]

prev, that is another important dimension: in addition to scripting various versions of a question in my head because I know the one my mind automatically comes up with will be seen as rude so I have to soften it, make it less blunt, etc. I also often feel the need to pretend that I don't remember conversations, even though I'm very good at remembering the content and context of conversations. I do not have perfect recall, but I'd say it's above average based on how people react. But yeah, when I repeat back to someone verbatim what they said in a previous interaction, they either act like it's creepy that I remembered or deny having said what they said. I know that a lot of the time allistics actually do remember and are trying to gaslight, misdirect, etc. But boy is it annoying It's like, "Hey, I have some challenges in communicating verbally, especially with new people. Would you be so kind as to make this a little bit easier for me in these specific ways?" And the response is, "Of course not. Fuck you. Here are some more obstacles. Good luck."

#image descriptions #actually autistic #ranting

[mellomaia]

• talking out loud

There’s no such thing as work-life balance for neurodivergent & chronically ill people.

This is because everything in my life requires work:

maintaining friendships

keeping up with my hygiene

managing bills

making money

remembering my basic needs

sleeping regularly

outputting creatively

All requires some aspect of work for me.

And when everything in your life requires work, your balance goes out the window.

If you're neurodivergent and overwhelmed — I see you.

If you're chronically ill and overwhelmed — I see you.

You're not dysfunctional.

You're not incapable.

You're doing your best.

[mellomaia]

[ID: the meme of DW from the show Arthur where she says, "that sign can't stop me because I can't read" upon seeing a "Keep Out" sign on her brother's bedroom door. I've edited the meme so that the sign reads "Social Cue," and DW says, "That social cue can't stop me because I can't read it." end ID]

I read a social cue once. I mean, I read it wrong,,, but I did read it.

#actually autistic #image descriptions

[mellomaia]

if u cant describe ur own stuff on tumblr u can still help ur visually impaired followers with 2 quick things:

look in the notes to see if someone already wrote a description. a lot of the time, someone already has

if theres no description in the notes or u cant write ur own, please tag the post as undescribed, so we can avoid inaccessible posts!

[mellomaia]

Ok but if I were a drag queen these kinds of dresses are what I would wear

obsessed with the era of historical fashion between the 1860s and 1870s where aniline dyes kept being invented. you can find some absolute fucking eyesores of dresses that were only made that way because “acid magenta” was invented last month and it was trendy.

like this iconic gown:

or this one from the 1870s in aniline purple and aniline black:

or a trendy yellow and black gown from c. 1865, perhaps?

feel free to reblog with additional eyesores (affectionate) that i might have missed

#undescribed #long post #fashion

[mellomaia]

you have to stay alive. you're going to be such a beautiful middle aged freak. young freaks will see you in the street and know that things can be okay.

[mellomaia]

not now mom i’m wasting my life on a website the entire internet believes to be dead

[mellomaia]

we do not talk enough about how you get hit front and back by being a jew and supporting Palestine. For a recipe that i want to make during Shabbat I have to scroll through a jewish recipe blog and cringe at the I Stand With Israel posts and then go back.

so a bunch of jewish spaces aren't safe anymore or are landmines. then you're forced to go someplace else. then there's tumblr with the people who think Jews=Zionist.

like oh, you're jewish? they immediately think you support the idf or something and praise genocide or something. your family barely survived a genocide that wasn't even like more than three generations ago and its being used as some sort of crutch to israel's moral defense when israel does NOT give a fuck about holocaust survivors at all except for their pr...

like damn bro im just trying to live my life and cook normally. Palestine has my entire heart. but like the pipeline from Palestine advocacy to accidental antisemitism to purposeful antisemitism is so 😭😭. man. i just wanna say guys jewish people aren't your enemies. the goal is to stop genocide not make the nazis proud of you or something

[mellomaia]

we are RADICAL REBELLIOUS QUEERS WHO LOVE GAY SEX but don't break the rules of our social panopticon and don't point out misogyny or racism and don't do any of that freaky kink shit around me or I'm reporting you #ACAB #DOCRIME

[mellomaia]

I'm in awe of how we ran historical revisionism on the civil rights movement so bad that people truly believe it was quiet self-sacrifcial non-disruptive christ-like activism that forced progress and not — like — the incredible economic pressure of boycotts and outbreaks of illegal civil disobedience

Yapping to the choir but eughhh it burns me up girl effective protests have to be loud and inconvenient for change to happen because silent cries die in the dark that's the entire pointtt

[mellomaia]