lucidityof9

[lucidityof9]

Familiar close faces and many landscapes.

[lucidityof9]

The house, nighttime, being chased/hunted. By an entity. Something. Hiding the kitten [a new addition to the family], in a room deep within. Stone walled, fireplaces, warm and safe. The heart of the home. A room inside this room. Heavy wooden doors.

Dream changes; morning light, the walls open up, people are in the home, ceiling grow high and as I walk through the house, parts have been added and restored/remodelled to a newer use. Bright and renewed. Others have moved in thinking it vacant, but o proclaim it’s my inheritance and i will live here

[lucidityof9]

Reality

Often my memories can be blurred with dreams I’ve had. Some so vivid, places I’ve been in both waking & slumber. Slumber that drifts into daily routine within my subconscious beat.

I go real places in current time when I drift lucidly at night.

Sometimes it’s hard to tell, where my physical foot has been & my metal eye.

Curious to me. Confusing to some.

[lucidityof9]

Friday 13

First night without SNRIs in a year. Woke with intense zaps. Slept so heavily and well.

Snow sliding in to river side military stakes our party. I was swimming nude to catch hot young guy males attention. Later found myself snagging drunk grads leftover bags of items Laos by the river.

Nighttime house of horrors. Puzzle house you can escape with dark entities trying to get you. Land end all. There were people there stuck on the edge of the land in limbo, spirits never able to leave bud were never caught. Like a pocket, island or a memory that you couldn’t leave. Always dark always running. Twisting and turning.

Two part bar or the dead, like a waiting space of the after life. We escaped into the town. Held up in an old iron shop type building or metal. Thought we could hold out. We got caught and jailed.

Dragons growing, royal family, older days of broom dresses and corsets. Stone and fire everywhere. Grounded. Community watching for one another. Even as the dragons grew to betray the royal family , my family. They were pets grown to beasts who now hunted us and anything. As animals do. Not a scary dream, more noticing the community taking us in as we hid from the devouring flying creatures finding refuge.

[lucidityof9]

Black blades, sex slaves, black market surgeries

12•Sept•2023, main bdrm solo.

Oversleeping the morning

DREAM: Um, well, a women who get kidnapped with her newborn. She manages to trade the newborn out of she promises the kidnapped her body. In my dream it was always night, always a clear night. People looked for her but they gave up. 8 years of rape and being kept prisoner in a home with this man. Until one day she manages to get his trust enough to get to something sharp and she slit his balls when he can to see her, then his throat.

Smooth, calculated, not a blink to look over him as she steps away over his fleshy bloody mound on the floor.

After escaping she went to the place she new her daughter went. Turns out the old man that took the daughter was an insanely rich old guy by strange dirty money. He operated an underground surgical procedure clinic. She managed find herself there, slipping in through the rather gorey looking muscle at the entrance.

It was looming like an old hospital in there, hints of old pink and yellow on the walls. Upon entering it turned into a main checkered floor hall. Drips of blood on the floor or curtains on each room she passed. Uncomfortable amounts of blood splatter. Some rooms empty left with the presence of something unusual had happened, others had oddly wrapped patients, one with gauze around his entire head/face, another with a two nurses holding a patient down and the doctor (looking like a middle aged surfer with a drinking problem), climbs up on the patient lying strapped on the table, his shirt open, her chest skin peeled back, ready to operate. Maybe some sort of implant?

She gets to a room that’s empty, but she sees tools laying out. Shiny, sharp and laid there for her to choose anything as she may have needed in self defence.

She leans in unison as someone in a hospital gown stumbles into the doorway behind her, mumbling and loud, startling her. Before she could move to react, a tall looming body steps in behind the bumbling patient. Swiftly and quite. A long black sharp blade slices the neck then impales down the spine. The tall suited black body guard she passed at the front. A large woman, grim appearance but sharp and clean like her blade. Rather masculine. Throws the patient aside and steps in the room ignoring her.

The blade is all shine, well taken care of the length of an arm but not full sword length. Black handle, with a unique addition near the handle. Something protective and sharp to keep the hand well while holding. The looming shadow of a person leans the blade directly beside the women, while stepping past the women.

Uncaring if she touched it, noticing maybe she more admired it? The tall one dressed in black rummages, opening cabinets and pulls out other blades. Just as sharp, shiny, unique and certainly not for surgery’s sake. The women and the dream focuses on the beauty and well kept weapons. The spots of blood. The way the blood can’t by seen on the black blade at all, only as it drips to the white tile on the floor do you realize it’s coated in blood.

The movie : Bloody Mary as reference to feel.

[lucidityof9]

Perfect boyfriend

5•July•2023

He was tall, looming over me in the softest way. Younger good looking but only younger by a couple years. Dark, brown blonde hair, a smile, infectious, and big, like Jay’s. He wore a white button up shirt, casual. Would offer me his arm to hang over giving me attention constantly, always looking for my eye contact. yet a slightly attuned attention to little details everywhere. Slight grab of my chin for eye connection, sometimes a kiss. Firm but softly. The feeling of that overwhelming warmth in your heart from wanting to be around him, to being around him. It felt so safe and warm and electric.  the sexual tension was there, but he almost never leaned into it. It was incredibly refreshing to have somebody want your presence, and only your presence. Only your attention. The sexual energy felt so natural. 

He got along with people, well, with us, happy open demeanor, but not overly ecstatic. A good balance of positive interaction. In the dream we drove around with three others. It kept evolving as the adventure went. In and out of the vehicle. I even came up to them during work when I came to visit the market in town. It was so immediate to, want to be in my presence. Extremely attentive and present. Lots of PDA. Oddly enough, I had asked him to be my other boyfriend. In the middle of asking, he got distracted by a chocolate pastry he wanted to buy us lol. Another odd point in the dream was that he had a son. He had next to no ego, pure, innocent confidence. Good karmic intentions overall. Learned from deep understandings of the darker parts of life.

No he didn’t smoke thankfully

#dream journal #dream log #dreams #perfect man #dream

[lucidityof9]

Twins & Beach Trains

22•June•2023 ~New moon

Dreams are growing longer & more vivid.

Now that we sleep full 8 hours. Maybe it’s the emotions sleep by in me while the medication (SNRI) suppresses. Maybe it’s the fullness in my life.

I lived the full growth of pregnancy. Jays offspring. From the growing, rounding belly, water breaking, I assuredly and stand fast to pull forth the babe myself. In the nature. Among the stars, water, trees and breeze with my loves there safely. Birthed them, and the placenta. There was a girl & a boy. Duality. I recall the detail of cleaning the birth matter and blood from their little wrinkled bodies with raw instinct.

[lucidityof9]

Discord & buttholes

Unfortunately lately my dreams have been nothing but fever dreams. A mess from my medication. Not true dreams. Jumbles and discomfort. My emotions trying to seep out in dream state.

[lucidityof9]

Muk tuk

In my dream I was given seal blubber to chew on. It was salty chewy and you kept it in your cheek to chew for an hour or so. The body like the good fats and the meat killed respectfully.

[lucidityof9]

Dreams of my dreams

Three graves: 3 best friends.

A, S, I

A was first

I dug them and planted them ready with herbs, beautiful plants, and tree around to grow tall.

(Oddly it was started in a familiar house, in a living room)

{I’d like to own a funeral lot. Where we only bury you the way we came into this world. Laid with plants, herbs, mushrooms, flowers of all kinds. Where we grow a forest amongst our dead. Bringing life to our lives done.}

[lucidityof9]

[After a night off Dev. (for a night out at a caper wig house party) my dreams gave me all the lovely things in one creation!]

19.Dec.2022

A building filled with a warm atmosphere. a place of water, comforts and places to be social. All aspects. The lighting was perfect. The flow of people, the maze like rooms, the levels unlike any regularly laid out square building. I was having the time of my life.

The pool room had no gravity, an inviting cool feel. People were playing above the water, like a floating game of volleyball.

I went to change in the showers room, which I quickly realized, had a very heavy sexual atmosphere, and a lot of attractive females. Anime scene here we are. I had to pee quickly and had someone peep at me trying to flirt 😂

Found myself walking along the pier to the establishment (large one indeed), found the combat grounds! Shooting range, fighting, archery, swords… all of it 🤩⚔️

I walked out to a garden lit atmosphere, laid out a lawn walkway on either side. There was what looks like cabin buildings with wide-open glass fronts, too be inviting. All with different themes and feels. I found myself laying in one, on a large large bed, a room full of cats and kittens gravitating towards laying with me on the bed. I was so giddy!

[Why was my brain giving me all the dopamine?! On the night I skipped the dev? Hmmm curious. Especially the way my brown reacted before on some. My suppressed feels would come out in my dreams. More intensely than I’ve ever felt in waking life about three years prior. So intense]

[lucidityof9]

Few nights before leaving J family house (after 3 solo weeks there for SSTL courses)

3 nights of strange intense dreams and sleeplessness

I’m not going to say the dream straight out, rather explain it first. It wouldn’t give much of a Description if I was to try and word it out in anyway way shape or form. I’ll start with a brief understanding;

You know those falling dreams? You hit and wake up or are about to hit, wake up, heart racing, panicked with the bed moving like you just fell into it. Every time it feels like I just fell back into my bed.

Well imagine free falling like so, waking up mid fall only to start the dream over again. Lucidly aware that you were still dreaming. Stuck in a dream loop. I kept falling after exploring the dream a bit and then waking up in another part of the dream, and having this continue almost a dozen times over and over. Becoming slightly more lucid each time just a little quicker. The dream foundations mutating and warping more and more as I went deeper, the infinite void of continuous dreamscape became more acknowledge able. Self-aware? Almost working against me.

Green tall strands of seaweed floating up as if in water that was not visible, twisted into thicker vines stretching outward. Using them to swing around they became more resilient and stretchy as I went to fling myself up on to a higher level. They slow grew reaction with a mind of their own, wrapping around me and resisting. Like tentacles with a mind.

Floating surfaces in the air, otherworldly dream state from images and art.

[lucidityof9]

Nov.13

Salt & amber.

Otherworld versions of us. Alternative universe.

Spiral birds

[lucidityof9]

End of Nowhere

Woke up to Hail and vibrant sunrise

Unease in my thoughts

I got unnecessarily upset and ruined the day for us. He left without a word.

The dream had a finite feel or the end of the world. The road winded to sand, and water as far as the eye could see. The land slowly disappearing the farther we drive. Jay & I. Clear, unmoving, crisp water. Warm bright skies reflected off the sheet of vastness. The trees slowly falling away to the water engulfing everything. You could see remnants everywhere of humanity. Like after a storm, when everything is strewn everywhere, but covered in sand and being eaten away by the water over time. Remnants of the many things & stuff humanity will quickly forget about.

I get nervous when the last of the shore on our drive, had completely ceased from being visible under the water. The car not able to go any further, we look to our right and see an inn or sorts. In the middle of now where. The end. We get out of the car to go inside and have a stretch before deciding whether to stay a night or continue back the way we came.

Inside there is a small staff, that are almost part of the place, noticeably. Wearing mostly dark or black clothes. Make up done up and everyone rather not ugly, but well kept. A lady at the counter greets us while a few bustle past in the background. You can hear the kitchen in the distance busy with movement as well. She offers me a large glass of rose (quite filled to the brim) while asking why we would ever come here?! In blundered wonder. This place is no place to stop she goes on to talk warmly and boldly. We find comfort in a rest while we ask pricing. 150 a night.

Jay leaves out to the car, I think we are leaving so i down the glass and thank them for the hospitality. Rush out to find him grabbing our bags to stay a night. Oh ! well I honestly thought he wouldn’t.

[lucidityof9]

6am full moon

Dream of a future where there are few people, we keep in small groups on the move. Tribes on the run from watchful government eyes. To the woods. Happy and quiet. To our roots and rivers, running wild on minimal. We are strong and agile again this way. Always moving.

We come to a place in the woods where a warm clean bath is set up outside. The women wash nude, soothing our worn muscles. Vibrant pool blue, steam rises, with a view amidst the trees of green and leaves. The smells fresh. I walk in with my white shirt, blood and dirt seep off my skin. I’m fit and sore. I love it. Even more rewarding when I walk clothed into the warm water. Stripping after I’m in chest deep. The water is so clear and clean. Cleaning before we are to head inside for a rest with the others.

[Working backwards from end to begins helps me recall my dreams]

Prior we were fleeing the city areas after heading through for tools and weapons. Things of necessity. It’s dangerous, fighting, bargaining and an untrustworthy atmosphere of high guard all through the city till we leave. Tech and filth everywhere. Quickly being overtaken but earth, but still there where others cling.

[lucidityof9]

Steamy dreams

[It’s been four days due to period, which is along time for us 😅 Not much kink action or talk the past few weeks. And a weekend event that fell through in the city. But over all it’s been a relaxed time.]

Bath house. A very large house sized room with sections and walls for privacy. The steam offered more than enough. Just below waist deep hot tub water. There were handfuls of people. All nude or ba draped towel. Mostly men.

Jay & I were feeling the steamy sexual energy. I was so horny. We started playing and fucking. The details where there. Others gradually joined in. Touched all over. I was concentrated on. My holes filled, played with, slippery all over with herbal oils of the bath house.

I kept catching a loving eye with my partner. It was delightfully intoxicating, slippery and hot. The atmosphere and the action. The cocks where large and throbbing. Just yummy.

[lucidityof9]

Restless night dreaming.

We are in a forest, like an encampment made after the world was ending. We were going out of the little village boundary To scavenge? Knowing full well we were running into large monster like creatures we would have to face. They look something like the creatures from where the wild things are stories. I woke up as we approach them