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“Healing is a choice. It is not an easy one because it takes work to turn around your habits. But keep making the choice and shifts will happen.”

— Yehuda Berg

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Bojack has it too

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“I little by little came to a realization: herpes really isn’t that scary. Annoying, yes. Painful, of course. But it’s only scary because people make it that way. The most common STD in the United States, yet the stigma around it is still very much alive. From being a part of this community, I realized that ending this stigma starts with me and you, and if we all work together, we can fight it and win!”

— Excerpt from my new book, “The 75%”

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8 Times ‘Adam Ruins Everything’ Enlightened Us All

You think you know, but you have NO idea.

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The Stages of  Grief (Herpes Edition)

Denial. I woke up on a Monday morning; after a Sunday night of rough sex. I went to the bathroom and could barely get anything out. Great, I have a UTI because I fell asleep right after. *Eye-roll* Days go by, I’m drinking tons of water, drinking sugar-free cranberry juice. My UTI is not letting up. I should go see a doctor. Thursday comes along and I have to go to the ER because I am in so much pain when I do pee. Extreme burning. Extremely fatigued. My bladder is spasming - which is painful. I get some antibiotics, and some medication to help with the bladder spasming. I am informed that if I vomit, I need to come back. Friday at 4AM, I projectile vomit all over the bathroom. I resort to peeing in the shower because water helps take away the sting. I cry. I touch my labia, and that’s when I notice it… a bump. What the fuck is this? I take a picture (after getting out of the shower). Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. I have herpes. Friday at 10PM, I work up enough courage to go back to the ER. I get the visual diagnosis, and swabs done to confirm.

Anger. In the moments following the visual diagnosis. I am crying. My life is ruined. No one will love me. My boyfriend is going to accuse me of cheating, and I have done nothing wrong! Why does this hurt so bad? I should go over to his house and confront him! How is he going to do this to me?! He told me he got checked for STD’s and was clear! I shouldn’t have trusted him.

Bargaining. Why can’t I have chlamydia? What about gonorrhea? Why did I have to get something that’s incurable? Why me? What did I do wrong?

Depression. I didn’t move for days; with the exception of going to my partners house to inform him of my 2AM diagnosis. We cried together, and he apologized. I went home, called off work, and laid in bed. I cried. I wondered how I was going to tell my mom. What was she going to think of my boyfriend that she already didn’t like? Should I just commit suicide? Is life even worth living at this point?

Acceptance. This only came with research. Ninety percent of people have HSV. One in Five have genital herpes. I am not alone. I am not a minority. I can still have children. I can still live a normal life. I am a human being. I am not dirty. I did nothing wrong. Life is still worth living; it is beautiful, even when it’s painful. Not everyone is worthy to know of my diagnosis. My mom doesn’t need to know. My gossipy friend does not need to know. The only person that needs to know is myself, my partner, and any future partners. Herpes does not change me, it does not make me.

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What’s the difference between a bacterial STD and a viral STD?

There are a bunch of different sexually transmitted infections, and most of them can be separated into two categories: STDs caused by bacteria, and STDs caused by viruses. The main difference between them is that bacterial STDs are curable, and viral STDs are not curable. But it gets a little more complicated than that.

Bacterial STDs include gonorrhea, chlamydia, syphilis, and trichomoniasis (trich). STDs caused by bacteria can be cured with medicine. This means that once the medicine has finished working, the infection is totally gone and you don’t have the STD anymore. But if you don’t get treated, they can lead to health problems (like infertility) in the future. And it’s possible to get a bacterial STD again — that’s why it’s important to get tested for STDs regularly.

Viral STDs include herpes, HPV, and HIV. STDs that are caused by viruses can live in your body forever. That may sound scary, but viral STDs don’t always cause serious health problems. And there are treatments that can help manage your symptoms and prevent the virus from spreading to other people. Some viral STDs can even go away on their own.

Herpes is a super common skin condition that can cause outbreaks of blisters, but it’s not dangerous. Most of the time there are no symptoms, or the symptoms aren’t noticeable, so lots of people don’t even know they have herpes. Herpes outbreaks are no fun, but the first one is the worst. Repeat outbreaks are usually shorter and less painful. Most people with herpes get fewer outbreaks as time goes on, and some stop having them altogether.  People who have herpes can take medicine to help prevent outbreaks and avoid spreading the virus to their partners.

HPV is a common virus that has lots of different types, or “strains.” Some strains cause genital warts, which can be annoying but aren’t dangerous. Other strains can lead to certain genital and oral cancers, especially cervical cancer. But regular Pap tests can spot any problems on your cervix before they become cancer, and HPV tests can find the types of HPV that can lead to cancer. The HPV vaccine is also a good way to prevent HPV. Most of the time, HPV goes away on its own and doesn’t cause any health problems.

HIV is a virus that hurts your immune system (your body’s defense against getting sick). When HIV damages your immune system, it’s easier to get really sick from things that normally wouldn’t affect you. Without treatment, HIV can lead to AIDS, which is when other illnesses can easily attack your body. There are medicines that people living with HIV can take to stay healthy, and lots of ways to avoid giving HIV to other people. There’s also a medicine you can take to help prevent HIV, called PrEP.

STDs don’t discriminate. Anybody who has sexual contact with another person can get an STD. That’s why getting tested for STDs regularly if you have sex is important — the sooner you know you have an infection, the sooner you can get treated. The good news is, most STDs are easy to cure or treat. And having safer sex can help prevent STDs.

-Kendall at Planned Parenthood

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Biology

So, I am taking biology for a prerequisite for nursing and let me tell you. It is kicking my fucking ass.

Everyone in class seems to represent themselves in a way that makes them look like they are doing great in everything they do and yanno I'm getting tired of it.

I decided one day to just not even care about what I say even if it makes me look dumb as in telling everyone I'm failing etc. Haha so..

I was in my bio lab and someone said "omg theres only 3 classes left of the lab!" Everyone was super excited and I said "haha well that's awesome but only if I can manage to pass my lecture class!" Everyone started laughing really hard and they all agreed which was the first time that multiple people in that class admitted to also failing too.

I was really happy because yanno we all lie about things even if it is not necessarily something were meaning to lie about. We put this fake face on every time we go out somewhere to portray an image of ourselves into something that were not. We are really only lying to ourselves.

I actually benefited from being honest about my failing grade because now we are all working together to help eachother not fail as a class even though we dont know eachother well. When we speak up about the truth even if it's something we may be embarrassed about but if we just own it, then we wont be lying to ourselves anymore and we will all win!

Do it! Be more blunt!

#biology #college #semester #fail #wontfail #refusetofail #behonest #dontlietoyourself #benefit #class #worktogether #bluntashell

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How to Balance Life and College

I am in a state of mind where I feel like all I do is go, go, go. I haven't had time to stop and relax and take time for myself. It's funny because you know what? I actually have taken time to do things for myself, but the things I have chosen to do for myself has become more of a chore then anything.

I am currently working at a doctors office. With that comes a lot of responsibility. Always making sure that patients have what they need, being the listening ear for people that are really struggling, and always taking care of someone else. I was working four, ten hour shifts and going to school part time, but now I am working 24 hours per week and now I am going to school full time. I'm taking 16 credit hours and it is hard.

I decided that I needed to do something for myself so, I decided to sign up for a women's soccer league that has been a complete nightmare. Games cancelled, games scheduled right when I am working, and then when there is a game that I can actually make it to, I am absolutely exhausted and it's not even fun. I used to play competitive soccer when I was younger and I always enjoyed it which is why I decided it would be a good outlet for me to get out some of my stress.

My boyfriend takes night classes, so I currently do not spend as much time with him as I usually do. It is hard on our relationship just because we want to be with eachother and cant and it is emotionally exhausting.

So pretty much I am trying to find a balance with my life, school, work, boyfriend, and something to make me feel like I'm taking care of me.

I have at least 6 hours of homework every day, but great news- its summer semester and there is only 7 weeks left and that is my motivation. I know that once it's over I will feel so relieved! Haha but then I will start fall semester. Wish me luck!

#school #life of a college student #balance #boyfriend #work #premedhealthsciencedegree #wishmeluck #wishful thinking #i got this #find your balance

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School

I am the type of student that is always trying to stay on top of their work. It's very difficult, but in the end it pays off. I am currently taking classes at SLCC. It is a great cheap option that still is getting me a degree.

I wanted to talk about a discussion in my medical terminology class. The topic of this discussion is whether or not someone needs to tell their future employer if they have HIV and if we think that the employer will still hire them if they knew.

I of course put that this person does NOT need to tell their employer because it is their own personal health information and they do not need to know this information. People that carry HIV are also covered by ADA and employers cannot discriminate against them. Knowing this information I of course, explained myself.

The other I want to say 75% of the class disagreed completely. They feel that since this person has HIV that they are dangerous to society and that they should most definitely tell their employer that they are positive for HIV.

This type of stuff makes me have a fiery feeling inside. It makes me feel like I need to fight for these people. This world is so close minded and they dont think about how they would feel if they were in someone else's shoes. The social stigmas behind diseases like these are just completely irrational and it really breaks my heart. I honestly think that the social stigma behind STI's are the worst part of all of them. I think that if our society did not make a big deal out of these things then the world would be completely different.

I just want everyone to know that I stand against the social stigmas! I dont care if you have HIV, gonorrhea, chlamydia, herpes, etc. Everyone has fought a hard battle and you just never know the entire story behind something.

A wise man once said "I hope someday you'll join us and the world will live as one" -John Lennon

#johnlennon #thebeatles #STI's #social stigmas #stand up #stop judging #peace #kindness #love

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Hi there!

Hi my name is Aubrey. From now on, this will be my place where I write down whatever is on my mind. I am hoping that this safe place will somehow help someone out there know that they are not alone.

I have always wanted to be a writer. Since I was a young girl I would always write stories and make my mom read them. I have always enjoyed it.

Within the past 6 months I have had experiences happen to me that I wouldnt wish upon anyone. I realized that literally everything in my life happens so that one day I will be able to help someone else going through the same exact thing. This has always been the case and that is exactly why I am going into nursing. I hope to touch people's lives in a way that I never thought I could.

I hope that this blog takes off and is something in my life that I look forward to every night. I need something for me and I hope this is it.