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kwonal · 2 years

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Letter to your soulmate ✉️

My very first pick a card. This pick a card is going to be about your letter (the reader) to your soulmate. What would you write to them? Let’s find out. Pick from 1-4. Thank you.

P.S. Their responding letter will reach you soon.

Disclaimer: This is meant as entertainment only. Takes only what resonate.

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💌 Letter 1 🍒

9 of Swords, 6 of Pentacles and 3 of Swords in reverse

My dear Soulmate,

What have I become?. The thoughts of having you give me anxiety and the thoughts of not having you also give me anxiety. My doubts and my fears do get to me and I would lay at night thinking that maybe there is no one out there truly meant for me. It’s a long process I have to go through, keeping my anxious thoughts at bay and learning discernment. To know the different between my fearful thoughts and reality. And I will learn not to judge myself for those low moments of self-deprecation and self-pity. Because deep down I know that the universe works by the law of cause and effect, the law of karma. At least in this life, you and I are tie by our past karma and the universe will give to me you, whom I deserve. Not only the universe is fair but it is also generous.

I know at this time we’re not together yet because I still have some wounds to heal, wounds I am reluctant to address. Even though I am working very hard trying to earn stability and security, I still fear that I am not ready and this quote comes to mind “One can be the master of what one does, but never of what one feels”. I know I do more than enough but why does I feel like I am not enough. It’s because, growing up, I kept telling myself these dialogues for far too long, “if I am not the fears anymore, then what has I become?”. Would you know?. While waiting for you I will become something else than fear. Courage?, joy?, relieved? Who knows. But at this time, please wait a little longer. We will meet soon when I address my low self-esteem issues. I will also work on my mother wound. When we meet I will tell you all about her and how much fear she instilled in me. She was a hardworking woman and similar to me, she never saw her own worth. She ties her worth in monetary gains and seeks outside validation. For that reason, she was really never here for me and in our relationship, it lacked the balance of equal give and take. I felt like I was only giving and never really received. So growing up, I only know how to give and now it still hard and awkward to receive but I am willing to learn.

Just by writing to you bring me so much joy and motivate me to learn. By connecting to you already make me want to be a better person, to show up as my best for you. When we meet I want to give you something as well, a small token perhaps. It’s small but it will mean so much. I know that when we meet, even though it will be brief, I will think about those moments shared for the rest of the week. You will fill my mind, take up every space and the constant thoughts of you will make me smile. Your caring nature makes me go soft, you help me to finally feel what it’s like to have someone truly care for me. I appreciate how you are so determine to remind me everyday that I am more than enough. Times where I will put myself down you will be quick to lift me up even higher. My shining star, who shines the brightest in my darkest night “if one word would describe love, it would be your name…”. You will teach me what true love really is and I will be your willing student.

Love,

(Your name)

Channeled poem: To Be In Love by Gwendolyn Brooks “To be in love is to touch with a lighter hand. In yourself you stretch, you are well.”

Channeled song: LOVE POEM by IU “I’ll be there, behind you who walks alone” “I will sing for you who walks long nights than most”.

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💌 Letter 2 🎀

The Hierophant in reverse, 9 of Wands in reverse and 8 of Wands.

Hey you,

I just want to say that I am not like other girls/boys. I am not traditional and the thought of marriage, working 9 to 5 and conventional stuff, they don’t appeal to me. I rather do something else to secure my life. I know that it would be slow, very slow but at least my foundation will be firm. I will build it out of my true authentic desires instead of other’s. I also know that it would mean our meeting will happen later on in life because right now I want to focus on myself, my security. It is sad that our union will take a little while but I know deep down that it will be worth it. In the meantime, I will continue to fight for my way and put in the necessary work. Even though at times, I feel so tired and burned out and sometimes I feel like these burden paths will never end. I know the place I want to achieve is high, I want to reach for the stars. I know these dreams do come with a lot of work and sacrifices. I know that, I can see the path clearly without illusions or rose coloured glasses. And I know that you are also cheering for me. You will be the most supportive person I know. When I feel like giving up, you are/will give me the strength to follow my heart. You remind me that I am part of something bigger, that I am part of the divine. I will understand that to honour the divine is to honour myself.

When I understand my fears a little better, I understand myself more and those past moments where I made ‘mistakes’. I can sometimes focus too much on the finish line, too much on the bigger picture and forget about the little details where it is most important. When I am fearful, I don’t focus enough on my actions rather I only worry about the results. I need to understand that there are huge correlation between the progress and the final outcome. It is a direct reflection. With that in mind, I must bring balance into my lifestyle. I can’t just work work and work. Life is about moderation and ironically the right temperance will somehow bring the fastest results. These realisation bring to me the confidence to continue whether or not I will succeed. I know you know these feelings really well and we relate a lot through our ‘failures’. We know what it’s like to have to face our dark and raw emotions and to be honest with ourselves. To feel the pain and loss of failures without repression and shame. You and I have to learn to listen to our emotions the hard way but it is worth it as we gain sincerity through those hardships. And now we can give it to ourselves and others. So when I’d meet you, you will only receive my utmost sincere emotions. I won’t repress my feelings for you either. After all, you will know either way because we are one.

When I met/will meet you, I can see so much of myself in you. Your journey remind me of my own, both the successful ones and the not successful ones. That is why I will understand you right away. I think I will fall for you instantly, without me realising, without me intending to. I thought we could just be good friends but through out each encounter I fall and fall more deeply for you. I love the dept of your character and through knowing you help me reach that dept within myself as well. You help me reach the deep uncharted water where I’m afraid to go and allow me to see it for what it is. By understanding the fears I have, I begin to fear less. You teach me true freedom where fears cannot hold me back anymore and now I can swim in the deepest ocean.

You are someone who can be deep and wise yet so beautiful and light at the same time. I grow fonder and fonder for you everyday. “My heart is so full of you I can hardly call it my own”. My feelings become so deep and intense that I can no longer hold it in. I have to confess how much I love you and through this letter I hope you can feel my love and support for you. You are my inspiration, the one where I will forever admire, my dream come true.

Yours, always

(Your name)

Channeled poem: The More Loving One by W.H. Auden “If equal affection cannot be, Let the more loving one be me.”

Channeled song: You Say by Lauren Daigle “You say I am loved when I can't feel a thing. You say I am strong when I think I am weak. And you say I am held when I am falling short. And when I don't belong, oh You say I am Yours. And I believe (I). Oh, I believe (I). What You say of me (I). I believe.”

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💌 Letter 3 🍊

4 of cups, ace of Swords in reverse and the Hierophant.

Dear you,

I have to admit, it’s pretty lonely here without you. Maybe because I don’t really find anything or anyone interesting. It’s like there’s a disconnection between me and my environment. I can’t really connect to anybody, no one really understand me and I don’t care enough to understand them. I hope you can sympathise with my apathy. The world just look really bleak where I’m at, it is quiet but certainly not peaceful. I’m not sure if I should be the one that break this dullness. Even if it’s up to me to bring excitement back into my life, I still don’t know what I should do. I don’t really see a clear path to where I could escape this mundane life of mine. I know I shouldn’t expect you to come in and save me but maybe just maybe you could bring a little bit of magic back into my life. A sense of reciprocation perhaps?. But I’m not entirely sure how you could do that.

I only see it in movies where the main protagonist fell in love and their world turn up side down. Suddenly they find purpose and joy in their life. From black and white to array of rainbows, full of vitality. Excitement even in the little things, wild flowers turn to the most beautiful thing. It is these energy where you fall head over heels for your life , it’s where I can’t see myself being in. How can one person affect or influence another so much?. Maybe that’s exactly what you’re going to teach me. Are you going to come in and teach me the tradition and cliche of being in love?. A feeling of ecstasy and bliss where you sing with birds. It’s feel kind of silly and funny just by imagining it. I never really meet anyone who can make my heart sings that much. No one makes my eyes sparkles or my heart to skip a beat or even beat faster. No on really influences or interest me that much. So I hope you can change that for me. I know it’s not good to set expectations but at least I hope that you can make me stray, that you can make me follow you wherever you’d go. Can you be the one where I’d beg to take my hand and destroy this belief of mine where I demean the power of love.

I don’t understand how love can be the cure to everything. I want you to show me the power of love, show me that it is safe for me to express my love to you and also to myself. Convince me that everyone deserve to be loved, even me. Please show me that love is the answer because no one show me that before. Where I grew up, my childhood home, love wasn’t present. I didn’t have my parents to show me that unconditional love. Their love to me was conditioned and not all my needs were met. I didn’t really learn to connect with myself, to find out what I love to do or what I’m passionate about. I didn’t learn to take care of myself, I didn’t learn to love myself or meet all of my needs. I only learn to survive and mistaken these survival mode as normality. So I hope when you come along, your light would ignite the fire within me, the fire that had been dormant. You can teach me to unlearn these survival way of living. I hope you would love me unconditionally. With the fire that you ignite, it will continue to guide me even when the sky turns dark.

You would teach me what it means to truly take care of yourself in all aspects, physically, emotionally and spiritually. I hope we can create together a sense of home and safety where I can be for you and you can be for me. That we can hold hands and face whatever it is that we have to face together. I do want to do all those cheesy romantic things with you. Talking on the phone all night, chocolate and red roses on Valentine’s and even dancing in the rain. Let’s exchange poems as well. I do want to marry you and create a future together. I want to introduce you to my family, build a home and have children. I want to fully be here and enjoy the present moments. To feel the joy, pain and other range of emotions of life and see it as an adventure rather than something mundane and dull. So, let’s create that life together.

With love,

Your soulmate

Channeled poem: Variations on the Word Love by Margaret Atwood “Then there’s the two of us. This word is far too short for us, it has only four letters, too sparse to fill those deep bare vacuums between the stars that press on us with their deafness.”

Channeled song: Willow by Taylor Swift “Wherever you stray. I follow. I’m begging for you to take my hand. Wreck my plans. That’s my man.”

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💌 Letter 4 🪲

2 of Cups in reverse, 7 of Swords and 4 of Swords in reverse.

Dear (name of soulmate)

I hope our union will turn out better than my last. Somehow I am not so successful with my love life. I guess I have a lot of lessons to learn through love in both romantic and platonic love. One of the lesson was the lesson of equal give and take, balance and reciprocation. Let’s just say that the divine did test me to see if I really understand the concept. They showed me that I can’t be the only one that give, I have to receive from my lover/the other person as well. What I had wasn’t a true reciprocal relationship, I had to see and admitted that. I had to be honest with myself even if the other person wasn’t. I had to stop lying to myself and see truly what was going on. It wasn’t true love and it pained me to realise that. But loosing a fake love wouldn’t be as painful as pretending it was real. So I chose to walk away. I chose to walk away because I couldn’t take the emotional and mental turmoil anymore. I couldn’t take the emotional unavailability, the immaturity, the manipulation and the coldness anymore. That relationship brought me everything but my peace of mind. I didn’t like who I was becoming if I were to stay. So I chose to walk away, I chose to change and made my choices with discernment. I let my mind leads me to my freedom. I wasn’t happy where I was because I tried so hard to control my relationship and my environment. I know now that was not the way. My approach to love, specifically giving love have to change.

Even though it took a while and looking back I still regret something in the past but I did learn my lessons the universe taught me. I learned not to let my emotions blind me from the truth. I learned to be honest with myself and to have the courage to admit and address the issues. To know I, too, have the birthright to have a loving and reciprocal relationship where it brings me pleasure and is able to meet all my needs. I deserve connections where I feel safe to express myself truthfully where trust is not an issue. So, if you’re coming to me with an untruthful energy, just know that I learned my lessons and I am not going to repeat it. I don’t have the time or energy to go through that again. Thankfully, going through those lessons have help me spot a lie from miles away.

Just know that when we meet, I would be able to see through you. I am very good at reading people. So come as you are, don’t try to be someone you’re not. If you earn my trust, show me authenticity and reciprocation, I know that I would bewitched by you. I already know I love your true self, you don’t have to be anything more for me. I accept and love you as you are. And “if loving you makes me a fool, then I’ll be a fool forever”. When you can make me feel safe to express myself, I will shower you with my love. I will kiss you good mornings and good nights. I will hug you everyday and declare my love to you whenever you demand. I won’t ever let you doubt my love for you, my affection will be the answer. I will write you poems after poems and promise my love on every page. I will be dedicated to you, forever and ever, always.

Forever yours,

Name of the reader

Channeled poem: Bird-Understander by Craig Arnold “Of many reasons I love you here is one, the way you write me from the gate at the airport so I can tell you everything will be alright.”

Channeled song: Queen of Hearts by Twice “Baby I was born to rule, yeah I’m the queen, I’m the queen. And it’s all because of you that I’m the queen of hearts.”

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Thank you so much for stopping by, please do not hesitate to comment and tell me if it resonated. Any constructive criticism is also appreciated. See you on the next pick a card where your soulmate will respond to your letter.

Kind regards

- Dragonflydestiny 🪲

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