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ivanschenamaker
IvanSchenaMaker
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shout out to people who have seen you naked but you can still have regular conversations with
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i’m basically “pro-do whatever you want as long as you’re enjoying yourself and not hurting other people”
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He in his madness prays for storms, and dreams that storms will bring him peace.
Leo Tolstoy, The Death of Ivan Ilych (via feellng)
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Stressed, depressed and too poor to be well dressed
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¿Help?
I've been on depression medication for about 4 years now. I decided I wanted to try to get off it. So I did, not cold turkey, but slowly. I understand just because you stop taking depression medicine and you think you'll be fine - does not actually mean you'll be fine. What I'm trying to say is I know I'm not okay and I'm working on trying to be okay by going to a therapist (whom I haven't been to in weeks, I need to go). But I don't know what else to do. It seems like everyone is getting agitated at me because I'm sad, irritable, upset, and cranky, even disrespectful sometimes. I'm not trying to be this way. My really personality is very independent and bubbly, happy. But I'm not myself and that upsets me even more. Plus right now I'm having a lot of physical pain along with the emotional stress and burden. I want my house clean, I want everything organized, I want to get out of my trail or, I want my mother to be healthy, I want my fiancée to be happy, and I want me to be happy. I just don't know what to do anymore. I'm getting the urges to cut and do awful things. (I'm not going to because I promised myself AND my fiancée that I wouldn't cut) But, I am smoking pot behind his back. He doesn't like me doing it but it takes my mind off everything for a while and for a while I'm actually happy but I don't want to depend on drugs to feel good! My fiancée makes me feel high but since we don't live together, I can't be like that very much. I am trying to look up and fix me. It's just so hard after being torn apart over and over. Everyone has their tough patches in their young life and adult lives. It's just inevitable. But I still just want to be PAIN FREE and HAPPY. Someone give me advice please? Anyone? Or just inbox me something nice. You could call it looking for attention or whatever, I don't care. But I need it right now because I feel so damn low and lost. So... just... please?
#i want to be happy#i want to cry#i want to live life#i want to die#i want you#sad#depressed#help#happiness#sadness#cold#lonely#ugh#gah#asdfghjkl#dark#black#soul#crying#crazy#angel#fuck#:(
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