incorrect-kaeloo-quotes
Incorrect Kaeloo Quotes
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Stumpy: I don’t like playing basketball. I feel inferior to all other players and I end up playing like shit.
Mr. Cat: Don’t worry Nutcracker! Drink this! It's my super secret energy drink!
Stumpy drinks it
Stumpy, screaming: WOW! I FEEL INVINCIBLE! LET’S WIN THIS FUCKING GAME! I’LL WRECK HAVOC ON YOU, GUYS!
Kaeloo: Oh? I see what you did. You played the “Space Jam” card. That was just water and once we won you’ll tell him that the power was inside him all along, and he just needed to believe in himself. That’s sweet.
Mr. Cat, confused: No, I put cocaine in it.
Kaeloo:
Mr. Cat: We're losing by 20 points, for fuck's sake.
#kaeloo#incorrect kaeloo quotes#god it's been a long time since i posted any kaeloo stuff#thanks to pretty i didn't want to watch the show for a while but now i'm back
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Mr. Cat: Consider the fundraising over! Your hero has arrived!
Kaeloo: Uhh… where did you get so much money from, Mr. Cat?
Mr. Cat: Well, you know, I’m pretty good at numbers. I just crunched them, I stretched them, I analyzed my accounts, I timed the market-
Police sirens wail in the background
Kaeloo: DID YOU ROB A BANK?!
Mr. Cat: Oh, come on, Froggy, do you really think so little of me?
He opens the bag and purple dye explodes on his face
Kaeloo:
Mr. Cat: …it was a credit union.
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Stumpy: Mr. Cat is your father so you call him…?
Future Kaelat Kid: Daddy!
Stumpy: Great! And Kaeloo is your mother so you call her…?
Future Kaelat Kid: Mommy!
Stumpy: Awesome! And I’m your parents' honorary brother so you call me…?
Future Kaelat Kid: Uncle!
Stumpy: Perfect! And your daddy calls me…?
Future Kaelat Kid: An idiot!
Stumpy: Yes! Wait-
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Kaeloo: I can't believe you assassinated Jean-Guillaume!
Mr. Cat: Well, “assassinated" implies it was politically motivated. I killed him cause he was an ass, so technically it's just murder.
Kaeloo: ...
Kaeloo: That's not better!
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Kaeloo: Are you sugaring your burrito?
Stumpy: Food is anarchy. Live by your own rules
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Stumpy: Hey, Mr. Cat! You wanna see something funny?
Mr. Cat: No.
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Stumpy: Time for plan G.
Quack-Quack: Don't you mean plan B?
Stumpy: No, we tried plan B a long time ago. I had to skip over plan C due to technical difficulties.
Kaeloo: What about plan D?
Stumpy: Plan D was that desperate disguise attempt half an hour ago.
Mr. Cat: What about plan E?
Stumpy: I'm hoping not to use it. Violasse dies in Plan E.
Cramoisie: I like Plan E.
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Lola Felicia: How did you manage to turn my own son against me?
Villain: Well, I just asked Mr. Cat if he wanted to humiliate you and he said yes.
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Cramoisie: So. Who broke it? *gestures to broken coffee machine* I’m not mad. I just want to know.
Vitamine: I did. I broke it-
Cramoisie: No. No, you didn’t. Violasse?
Violasse: Don’t look at me. Look at him.
Stumpy: What?! I didn’t break it.
Violasse: Huh. That’s weird. How did you even know it was broken?
Stumpy: Because it’s sitting right in front of us and it’s broken!
Violasse: Suspicious.
Stumpy: No, it’s not!
Lavanade: If it matters, probably not... but Nombril was the last one to use it.
Nombril: Liar! I don’t even drink that crap!
Lavanade: Oh really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart earlier?
Nombril: I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles. Everyone knows that, Lavanade!
Vitamine: Okay, okay, let's not fight. I broke it, let me pay for it, Cramoisie.
Cramoisie: No. Who broke it?
Ardoise: ... Cramoisie, Poucave's been awfully quiet...
Poucave: Really?!
Ardoise: Uh, yeah, really!
*arguing ensues*
…
Cramoisie: I broke it. I burned my hand so I punched it. I predict ten minutes from now, they’ll be at each other’s throats with war paint on their faces and a pig head on a stick. Good. It was getting a little chummy around here.
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Kaeloo: *hugs Mr. Cat*
Mr. Cat: What is this?
Kaeloo: Affection!
Mr. Cat: Disgusting.
Mr. Cat:
Mr. Cat: Do it again.
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Judge: How do you plead?
Mr. Cat: *mouthing* Not guilty
Stumpy: ... Hot milky
Mr. Cat: ... Just lock him up, Your Honor.
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Stumpy: There's something stupid going on in my head.
Mr. Cat: It's called a thought.
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Mr. Cat: The inside of your butt is warm enough to hard boil an egg
Stumpy: Oh no, I'm not falling for this one again!
Kaeloo: ... AGAIN?!
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Kaeloo: Shut up!
Stumpy: What? I haven't said anything!
Kaeloo: I know. I just wanted to make sure it stays that way.
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Mr. Cat: ARE YOU-
Stumpy: Fucking.
Mr. Cat: KIDDING ME?! YOU-
Stumpy: Fucking.
Mr. Cat: IDIOT!
Quack-Quack: …What was that?
Stumpy: Kaeloo banned Mr. Cat from swearing, so I’m helping him out.
#kaeloo#incorrect kaeloo quotes#kaeloo mr. cat#kaeloo mr chat#kaeloo stumpy#kaeloo moignon#kaeloo coin coin#kaeloo quack quack
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"I identify as a threat my pronouns are try/me." - Bad Kaeloo
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Pretty: If you don't like me, just say so
Mr. Cat: Alright, I don't like you
Pretty:
Pretty: That is super hurtful-
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