im-having-a-gender-crisis

[im-having-a-gender-crisis]

Who cheered :D

[im-having-a-gender-crisis]

lucifer morningstar

[im-having-a-gender-crisis]

somebody dropped a newport 10000

[im-having-a-gender-crisis]

And my favorite:

The horse raced past the barn fell (the horse that was raced past the barn fell down)

Just learned about garden path sentences.

They’re basically a literary prank– the sentence starts out in such a way that you think you know where it’s going, but the way it ends completely changes the meaning while still being a complete and logical sentence. Usually it deals with double meanings, or with words that can be multiple parts of speech, like nouns and verbs or nouns and adjectives.

So we get gems like

The old man the boat. (The old people are manning the boat)

The complex houses married and single soldiers and their families. (The apartment complex is home to both married and single soldiers, plus their families)

The prime number few. (People who are excellent are few in number.)

The cotton clothing is usually made of grows in Mississipi. (The cotton that clothing is made of)

The man who hunts ducks out on weekends. (As in he ducks out of his responsibilities)

We painted the wall with cracks. (The cracked wall is the one that was pained.)

[im-having-a-gender-crisis]

I FIGURED OUT A MEDICAL MYSTERY THROUGH FANFIC AND NOT A FUCKING DOCTOR???

Story time bros:

I developed tics (mainly blinking and head twitches) a few years ago at the old age of 16. This was during the height of the "faking tourettes" thing on tiktok so everyone (parents, friends, doctors) thought I was faking.

But here's the thing.

A common side effect of a medication called Wellbutrin is facial tics, WHICH IS WHAT THE FUCK I HAVE

AND THE TICS STARTED A COUPLE WEEKS AFTER I STARTED THAT MED

and I /only/ found this shit out because I was reading a fic about a character trying to improve his life WITH A GODDAMN MEDICATION THAT MADE HIM HAVE TICS.

I'm baffled honestly that this is what it took for me to figure out what the hell was wrong with me medically.

The more you know

#welbutrin #tic disorder

[im-having-a-gender-crisis]

My grandpa posted this presumably to be transphobic or something but ngl it kinda slays. Get it vader

[im-having-a-gender-crisis]

reblog to give the prev a hot chocolate with (optional) whipped cream and marshmallows

[im-having-a-gender-crisis]

In honor of me telling my mother - to her face - that Bartolomeo from one piece is hot. Unironically. I've decided to compile a few examples of me and my irl bestie's absolutely deranged "doing it for the bit" inside jokes that have slowly incorporated their way into my every day lingo.

Save me

(1=me, 2=my bestie)

-

1 (trying and failing to throw something into the garbage): God, I keep missing!

2: that's your Quirk

-

*hot character on screen*

1: smash

2: smash

-

Alternatively,

*ugly ass character on screen*

1: smash

2: smash

[I said smash to the villain in Galaxy Quest once in front of my parents. Dark times]

-

2 (driving us in the car): Quit riding my ass!!

1: I wish zoro would ride my ass

2: I wish sanji would ride /my/ ass

1: I wish (...etc etc)

[This one has gone on for over 30 characters. Multiple times]

-

1 (right after saying some dumb shit to a customer): what the fuck is wrong with me??

2: it's not your fault, it's the Dark Reunion!

-

I'll probably add on more once I think of more examples. But for now, that's it

#im not tagging her cause idk if shed appreciate me calling her out like this lmaooo #but if you see this bestie feel free to add on any i missed

[im-having-a-gender-crisis]

thanks for the tag!!

Brace yourself for my addition

I- invincible - the unlikely candidates

M- midnight - tyler glenn

H- holding onto you - Twenty One Pilots

A- Achilles come down - gang of youths

V- vending machine of love - the stupendium

I- inkpot gods - the amazing devil

N- nobody - hozier

G- goodbye - bo burnham

A- afterhours- ajr

G- gone - nf

E- everything is killing me - neon trees

N- new perspective- panic at the disco

D- doubt - Twenty One Pilots

E- emperers new clothes - panic at the disco

R- randy mcnally - tx2

C- cry baby - matt maeson

R- running - nf

I- ironic - bo burnham

S- so bad - Brandon colbein

I- I just don't care that much- matt maeson

S- selene - imagine dragons

Also I'm close with no where near 21 people on here, so imma just tag all the people I can remember and call it a day

No pressure tags:

@brainrot-baby @letsgo-emxos @fuckyeahreligionpigeon @holistic-alcoholic @jello-fello @teaboot @upturninginkpots

Tag game by @genxrocker ! Pick a song for each letter of your URL, and then tag that many people!

Thanks for tagging me @get-the-cheese-to-sickbay ! :)

My url has quite a lot of letters, so buckle up buckaroos! I'm giving you a little tour >:)

O - Opernboogie by Georg Kreisler 😎

F - Funny How Love Is by Queen

F - Francesca by Hozier

I - If You'll Have Me by Paul Englishby (Part of the soundtrack of 'Miss Pettigrew Lives For A Day' - highly recommend!)

C - Ciaccona (I&II) by L'Arpeggiata, Christina Pluhar

I - Iris's Song For Us by Vashti Bunyan

A - Ae Fond Kiss by The Corries

L - Let's Call The Whole Thing Off by Ella Fitzgerald & Louis Armstrong

L - Lippen Schweigen (Waltz Song - The Merry Widow) by Franz Lehár, sung by Richard Tauber

A - Ankomme Freitag, den 13. by Reinhard Mey

U - (Ummmm, Oh Yeah) Dearest by Buddy Holly

C - Cha Cha Cha by Käärijä

H - Humoresque Nr. 8 by Antonín Dvořák

Z - Zeugnistag by Reinhard Mey

W - While Gamekeepers Lie Sleeping by June Tabor

I - I'm Fine by Daisy the Great

E - Everybodee Who's Anybodee by Cole Porter

B - Back That Azz Up by JUVENILE, Lil Wayne, Mannie Fresh

E - Ein ehrenwertes Haus by Udo Jürgens

L - Leaving on a Jet Plane by John Denver

If you're seeing this, consider yourself tagged!!

Addtionally, I'm tagging @brandybradyrandyandyndy @caressthosecheekbones @liebelesbe @chaotic-carnifex @vosquitransitis @momdailykos @itsfantasticallyhomoerotic @luminatingsatan @basilikum7 @wolfossum @thefebruaryfriday @schlauhonk @joghurtbrot @gaytomatic

Of course, only do it if you want to :)

#music recs

[im-having-a-gender-crisis]

How do you become a gimmick blog?

step 1: think of a gimmick

step 2: blog

[im-having-a-gender-crisis]

I recently found out why my mom would never sleep around me when I was a kid. Like she’d never let herself take naps or sleep if I was awake, ever. Or if she did, she would lock her bedroom door. So when I was 6, I was asleep in my bed in the middle of the night when I hear a loud bang, like a pot being dropped and come out to the living room to see my mom standing by the window, with just a huge pile of spaghetti all over the sill, and a pot on the ground, and I ’m like “Are you gonna eat all that?” And ya’ll she get’s BIG MAD and yells at me and chases me to my room but then a little while later a bunch of cops show up and ask me a bunch of random ass questions about my art? Like this one cop lady keeps asking me to draw dragons for her?! And they seem mad as hell

I didn’t want to get arrested so I just never asked my mom for spaghettis after that. Lesson, learned. Don’t ask mom for spaghettis or she’ll call the damn police on you. 

So I have this memory in my head, and it goes unquestioned until I say it outload for the first time a few months back and as soon as I say the words “When I was six, my mom called the cops on me for asking for spaghettis” My adult logic slams into place and is like “Hang on. Your mother definatly did not call the police on a 6 year old for asking for spaghetti.” 

So obviously that’s not what really went down. I call up my mom to tell her how I remember it and on top of her figuring out why her kid has always been really cagey around spaghettis for the last 3 decades she tells me what really happened. 

So on that night, a man tried to break into our house through the front window. It was just my mom, and her kids so she did what she felt she had too and shot him in the head. He’d been wearing a helmet, which landed on the floor under the window.

Now I just want ya’ll to put yourselves in my moms shoes for a minute here. This woman has just taken a human life. The trauma of that- the instant agony, the panic, the guilt, the fear- all of it hitting her at once, her only solace the knowledge that her children are safe. She protected her daughters. No matter the cost to her soul- her children are safe.

Then she looks up and sees her six year old staring at the inside of this mans head before saying “Are you gonna eat all that?” 

[im-having-a-gender-crisis]

[im-having-a-gender-crisis]

I got an iPad pro for my new tattoo apprenticeship job, and obviously the first thing I'd draw is a hot anime dude. So ladies and gentlemen, look at my babygirl Firefist Ace

#im aware this is prob not great #but i fucking /did/ that yknow? #like #first time even touching digital art and booom #thats ace on my screen #wild #firefist ace fanart #ace one piece

[im-having-a-gender-crisis]

Trying

[im-having-a-gender-crisis]

I did not get the apprentiship yet (😔) BUT the owner told me to come back when my portfolio was more flushed out. So here's some more art!! Because I spent a long time on these bitches and I thrive on attention

Ink on paper, with a tiny bit of colored pencil on the first page

Im going to an interview this Friday for a tattoo apprenticeship and I'm so excited bros omggg (wish me luck 🤞🤞)

Here's a few pieces in my portfolio that I'm proud of

Fun fact, the moonknight and girl on the roof artworks are like 3x3 / 3x2 inches big

#art #artists on tumblr #tattoo apprentice #tattoo design #art portfolio

[im-having-a-gender-crisis]

trick or treat!!

You got ⬇️

My cat sitting silly

#trick or treat #halloween

[im-having-a-gender-crisis]

Im going to an interview this Friday for a tattoo apprenticeship and I'm so excited bros omggg (wish me luck 🤞🤞)

Here's a few pieces in my portfolio that I'm proud of

Fun fact, the moonknight and girl on the roof artworks are like 3x3 / 3x2 inches big

#art #artists on tumblr #tattoo apprentice #tattoo design #art portfolio