gothgfveronicasawyer

[gothgfveronicasawyer]

never let anyone tell you that trawling through mediocre victorian poetry isn't worth it. we just happened upon an absolute BANGER of a worm poem. go read it or else 🪱🪱🪱

#jane prentiss core

[gothgfveronicasawyer]

[gothgfveronicasawyer]

I feel like every cell in my body is preparing to die, I feel so fucking numb, but so itchy and hot at the same time and I just want this to be over and it can't be because I still love too many people and even though everyone leaving hurts me so much I can't put other people through it 

#vent #general tw

[gothgfveronicasawyer]

aaaaand the best cat i ever knew is gone. my mom took the family old tabby to the er vet because he wasn't doing well, left him to get some treatment and wasn't even home an hour before they apparently had given him some pain medication just to help calm him down, and his heart just gave out. my whole family feels fucking shattered and I still have to go to work while the most suicidal I've ever been in my life. 

#suicide tw #animal death tw #vent

[gothgfveronicasawyer]

Dolo, Veneto, Italy by Eleonora Boiserie

#houses #dream house

[gothgfveronicasawyer]

[gothgfveronicasawyer]

I'm like if a girl had the urge to scream and break something all the time but stays quiet instead

#l m a o

[gothgfveronicasawyer]

Ophelia, 1851-1905 - oil on canvas — Constantin Meunier (Belgian, 1831-1905)

[gothgfveronicasawyer]

might not have ever talked about this on here, but i have had a pair of ducks since i was 9, and the last one just passed away. he made sure i was here and then within an hour passed, and im heartbroken but he was ancient, and he got a year as a widower and a taste of spring before he left, so i feel like he was ready and wanting to be with his wife who passed as the end of last january. I dont think ill ever stop being a "duck girl" despite not having a duck anymore or really being much of a girl anymore

#tw animal death #vent

[gothgfveronicasawyer]

Born to be a girl who’s curious about everything forced to be a girl who’s scared of trying anything new

[gothgfveronicasawyer]

ok fine maybe i DID come back wrong. what are you going to do about it. kill me? put me back in the ground? after all this effort? all this pain and suffering only to find out bringing me back wasn't worth it after all? you worked so hard. are you going to waste all of that just because im not what you wanted? just because i belong only to myself? are you going to let me pick out my own coffin

[gothgfveronicasawyer]

sensory-seeking behavior (masochism)

[gothgfveronicasawyer]

in the 19th century i would've gotten diagnosed with ghosts in my brain

[gothgfveronicasawyer]

Dont talk to me OR my gaping wound ever again

[gothgfveronicasawyer]

Winona Ryder during her sentencing for shoplifting (2002)

#Her

[gothgfveronicasawyer]

if youre my mutual im sorry for interacting with you in the confusing and cryptic ways that i do i wasnt socialized properly in the shelter

[gothgfveronicasawyer]

little moodboard of how realizing last night that my ex asked me for a photo of my tits barely 48 hours before their planned breaking up with me makes me feel 🙂

#I just want to scream and expose all of their sins because they're a stranger who now has my deepest secrets #They validated my anger and encouraged division and then took everything and it feels plotted #and now I'm the bad guy and God knows what they've said to everyone else and there's no defending myself or saying my side #and now there's just a group of strangers who all at least kind of hate me and who ill always resent but also deeply miss