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little unholy
yours was the first face that i saw, i think i was blind before i met you
asc. with @foulfiend
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i. sorrow and war and pain follows you like a shadow. a weight on your shoulders and just this once you know it is correct. it is correct in the death, it is correct in the loss, and it is correct in the anger. it is correct because you have failed so much already. so you do what you must. they call you a saint, you know you are not. they place you on a pedestal, you know you will fall.
ii. and like orpheus, you will look back at the past, the memories once so happy, and they will go screaming back into the dark depths, and you will be reminded how imperfect they were.
iii. memories betray you, and they shall continue to do so. and like the fomorians you will be defeated.
penned by horatio
established. 7.31.2019
personals don’t interact
private & selective & independent
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hiatus notice:
i got hit real hard by a case of the “old hyperfocus comes back tenfold with new title release” so! i’ll be... pretty inactive here (as you probably already noticed flakjsdlkfja)
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alright!!!!!!!!!!!
#i was wrong this thread is way more overwhelming now that we're boyfriends#KLFJALSDKJFALSKDJLKJ#thanks arson im dead !!#[✕] ❝ i'm the aggressive anticishet that your parents warned you about ❞ (ooc.)
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hey like, i know i said i’d let u personals follow me as long as u don’t clown on my posts but :/
#[✕] ❝ i'm the aggressive anticishet that your parents warned you about ❞ (ooc.)#sorry !#gonna be soft blocking nyall from here out#too many experiences w personals clowning
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alright anyways been a hot moment since i’ve been here, how about a starter call
#im active now i swear let's Get This Bread#personals if u so much as LOOK at this i will come for ur knees
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@foulfiend replied to your post: okay so basically i’m gay
oh you have a bf? who? 👀
#foulfiend#FAKSJDFAKSDLKFJALSKDJFALKSJDLKJ#[✕] ❝ i'm the aggressive anticishet that your parents warned you about ❞ (ooc.)
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okay so basically i’m gay
#[✕] ❝ i'm the aggressive anticishet that your parents warned you about ❞ (ooc.)#i went on an unannounced hiatus bc i was Pining too much#but it's okay bc i have a boyfriend now LKJFLKAJSDFLAKJDSLKJ
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@ personals following me: y’all know this isn’t a content blog right
#[✕] ❝ i'm the aggressive anticishet that your parents warned you about ❞ (ooc.)#i genuinely dont understand why personals follow rp blogs
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alright anyways been a hot moment since i’ve been here, how about a starter call
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tumblr i’m BEGGING u to give me notifs for when ppl reblog my shit
#[✕] ❝ i'm the aggressive anticishet that your parents warned you about ❞ (ooc.)#how ELSE will i know if it's my turn to reply!!
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personals... u can stay for now but if i find u being a clown on my rps i’ll have to soft block u
#[✕] ❝ i'm the aggressive anticishet that your parents warned you about ❞ (ooc.)#idk how u found me + why u followed me but
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ineffablemum·
GOD had a wonderfully expansive imagination. It was why SHE had created the world, and how it became so varied. Sometimes SHE longed to do it again, to fix the problems that arose in the EARTH, but SHE always reminded HERSELF that the humans, her beautiful creations, had created this situation for themselves and therefore must find a way out of it themselves. “I like books too, aziraphale. you should come to my personal library. i have a copy of every book from the library of alexandria. i know you enjoyed it there.”
❝ really? ❞ if his interest wasn’t already piqued it certainly is now. all that information . . . lost forever to the corporeal world and by extension, him. they MUST be first editions too! the humans had done that one themselves, it wasn’t like he could stop it, either. he was DEVASTATED when he’d found out. ❝ i mean, that would be such an HONOR to be able to see your collection. ❞ aziraphael was definitely proud ( humbly so ) of his own collection, but HER collection really must be something else entirely.
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crowley: saves his books for him in the blitz
aziraphael:
#[✕] ❝ i'm the aggressive anticishet that your parents warned you about ❞ (ooc.)#KFAJLDSKFJAKLSJDFLAKJSD
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a.dam y.oung... trans narrative....
#[✕] ❝ i'm the aggressive anticishet that your parents warned you about ❞ (ooc.)#like... everyone telling u ur something u don't Want to be and don't see urself as???#that's a trans narrative baybee!!!!!
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eyes on the stars, not me / *foulfiend·
aziraphale looking at him like that makes crowley feel seen . it’s uncomfortable , he thinks . he’s unable to hold the angel’s gaze , not when he’s got that look on his face . ( like crowley’s beautiful . something to admire . ) ( he knows that aziraphale doesn’t think of him like that , but sometimes his heart betrays him , sometimes a little bit of hope slips through . ) ( always quickly squashed , of course . he can’t allow it to burrow into his chest , to make him do something stupid . ) ( he'll never let himself ruin this . it’s too important . ) so he finally looks away . looks out over the knolls and through the trees and sighs , quietly , carefully .
he hears the patting of the blanket and wishes he’d made it just a bit bigger as he glances back down , sees the space he’ll occupy . sees how close they’ll actually be sitting . he doesn’t dislike being close to aziraphale ( quite the opposite , actually ; every moment he’s apart from the angel feels like his heart is being held captive ) but he’s always afraid . afraid the angel will finally say something . afraid that this is going to be the moment aziraphale brings up what’s so obvious , especially to one who can feel love . afraid that he’ll say that this is the last time they can spend moments like this together . ( afraid of everything ending . )
a quick , almost nervous , smile crosses his face as he sits , lanky limbs folding him into the small space in a way that seems gracefully improbable . ( almost as if he’s got too many bones , too many ligaments and muscles . ) he hums , quietly , in agreement . ❝ no angel , it’s not . usually you try to show me whatever marvelous food you've just discovered . ❞ his voice holds a tinge of humor , a bit of teasing , a hint of reminder that aziraphale is the tempter in their non-relationship . ( that aziraphale is far more concerned with material things than crowley’s ever been . ) ( the number of times they’ve gone somewhere simply because the angel’s wanted to share his newest temptation is nigh-uncountable . ) ( crowley's favorite temptation has always , of course , been aziraphale himself . ) he reaches between them and grabs the bottle of wine , uncorks it with a thought , and takes a drink . not his favorite , but it'll do . he holds it out to the angel ( still not making eye contact ) and glances up at the stars . ❝ glad it’s clear out , at any rate . would have been shit to get here and not even be able to see the stars , eh ? ❞ not that he even really cares about that , in all honesty .
aziraphael hums in response as he takes the bottle from crowley, hand briefly brushing with his. it was a nice night, a lot of nights are nice when it comes to the things they do together. ( all entirely by fault of their own. aziraphael’s not a fan of dreary days if he’s out in them. ) ( rainy bookstores he’s fine with. ) out with crowley, however, he prefers the nicer days. maybe it’s because it reminds him much of the first time they met, which was an equally nice day. ( all of them had been nice back then, for there was only a few of them. ) tonight’s no different. except, instead of shielding the demon from the rain as if it was only natural they fit together so, he sits by his side, saying he’ll be staring at the stars when that’s but a lie.
one bottle of wine shared between them won’t be able to really do much for them, it may as well be considered JUICE currently. that, of course, is without any angelic or demonic intervention. the bottle fills itself of what aziraphael had drunk as he holds it out for crowley to take back. he’s not looking at the stars, not really, because everything about this feels cliché. ( he likes clichés, easy to keep up with and never having to worry too much about how it might all end. ) a beautiful night under beautiful stars beside the one he thinks he’ll spend eternity with, passing a bottle of wine back and forth. it’s romantic. but oh, how he cannot allow any of that to be. not yet. not yet . . . not since . . . not with the end of the world and that he is an ANGEL and crowley is a DEMON.
( hereditary enemies, he reminds and scolds himself. )
how long has it been since aziraphael took the time to pull his nose out of his books to look UP at a sky so wonderful? a few hundred years, perhaps, and even then he’s not even doing it right now. he steals a glance over to crowley again. ❝ ah . . . WELL . . . food is NEW. the stars haven’t really changed much in the past few thousand years last i checked. they’ll always be visible from earth. ❞ as long as earth is here goes left unsaid. his confidence in their ability to do this correctly hasn’t really been as strong as crowley’s. he’s told Upstairs what he’s going to do and, of course, they doubt him. ( they always do so it shouldn’t be much of a surprise to him. it still stings, though. ) ❝ i suppose the only difference has been the WOBBLE. perhaps that’s the draw to them. we’re technically under the same stars we were under when we first met if you really think about it. ❞ and, he doesn’t say, i will always meet you, under the same stars, under different stars, anywhere, any time. crowley will come to him again and again and again as he always does. and aziraphael will wait, however long.
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gabriel: checks notifications
aziraphael: miracled a clear sky. miracled a wine. miracled a picinic basket. miracled a blanket. miracled a rose. miracled a
gabriel: what the fuck?
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a tragedy unfurling / *victimita·
the tear tracks settle. sinking into well practiced lines of make up. a frog on your shoulder. the gentle coqui, gathering up the miserable w a t e r l o g g e d corners of your overwhelmed mind. your nose, makes a decidedly living noise. you know that your body may not need it but for some reason it gives your mind at least a little bit of calm. you wipe tears from your e y e s. has it always been this bad? or was the human world just as terrible as the host had lead you to believe and causing all of these emotions.
because people are asking to help you here. you’re not dancing barefoot in the hostile overwhelmingly glossy pearl walls and locked doors of the host’s high rise. though you can shades of it in aziraphale. he’s still dressed in the same warm neutrals of the lands above you both. but also you know he’s difference, the host would not have tried to burn if he was not. you peer up at him, topaz doe eyes fixed intently on his face.
❛ why did you get to stay on earth? ❜
you don’t know how to answer, really. you twiddle your thumbs rather helplessly, glancing away. it was a TRICK. a scheme to get out of such a horrendous thing. well . . . scheme sounds too conniving for your taste, just call it a tactic or self preservation at its finest. you feel bad, really, you DO, but there’s not really much you can do. you don’t allow yourself to feel guilty about anything out of your hands. it’s all . . . INEFFABLE after all. easier to be apathetic about a lot of things with that in mind.
❝ i suppose it’s um . . . well, i think it’s because i had someone. ❞
you’re starting to think you’re only here NOW because you have CROWLEY in your life. an angel and a demon, quite the impossible pair. ( sometimes your mind betrays you and you start wondering if it’s BECAUSE of crowley that you’re here. ) ( no, you probably would’ve started your backwards slide into a life of apathy and hedonism even if it WEREN’T for crowley being around. ) you hand his own cup of cocoa that you’ve not touched over to them.
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