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This was a Patreon Request

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ellingson.tv on instagram

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OH MY GOD WAIT

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I can't stress enough how much I miss StumbleUpon

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Owning a black cat is awesome because you’ll leave the bathroom and The Shape will be waiting for you

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dealing with the worst case scenario

your condom breaks

you feel a lump on your breast

your friends are ignoring you

you’re stranded on an island 

you got rejected by a crush

you get into a car accident

you got stung by a bee/wasp

you got fired from your job

you’re in an earthquake

your tattoo gets infected

your house is on fire

you’re lost in the woods

you get arrested abroad

you get robbed

your partner cheated on you

you’re on a ship that’s sinking

you fall into ice

you’re stuck in an elevator

you hit a deer with your car

you have food poisoning

your pet passed away

you fall off of a horse

you or your friend has alcohol poisoning

you have toxic shock syndrome

your house has a gas leak

#toto saves

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*squeals tires, burning rubber all the way to you in the Oscar Mayer Weinermobile*

Get in, loser. We’re going to get our foreskins back.

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Everyone’s a critic.

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fuck esports, the only correct way to play smash is the way my 7 y/o niece plays it: connecting 2 controllers, setting one as peach, setting the other as marth, pretending marth is peach’s boyfriend and then playing virtual barbie and ken with them

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Happy birthday to Thomas Raith,

and happy valentine's day to everyone else.

i haven't drawn Thomas much, but hes one of my favorite characters. i drew him in his outfit from the side story "It's my birthday too".

(plus some earrings, painted nails and heart buttons on his shirt)

really happy with how this came out!!

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6'8" woman with big glasses im sitting next to on the couch watching two cartoon women appear on screen: i think they should fuck epic schnarsty style

me (trying not to go unconscious by death gripping my nintendo 3DS XL so hard the screen starts flickering): how much do yuo think you coulgd kiss me. with tognue.

#same

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🗣️🗣️ SWITZERLAND 🔛🔝 RAHHHHH 🇨🇭🇨🇭🇨🇭🇨🇭🇨🇭🏔️🏔️🏔️🐄🐄🐄🧀🧀🧀🫕🫕🫕

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Hell yeah!

"Ayo this sex stuff sounds kinda lit"

~The actual pope, from the Vatican, probably

[ID: There is a picture of Pope Francis speaking and the abstract says, "Pope Francis has said that sexual pleasure is 'a gift from God' that should be 'disciplined with patience'." End ID]

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Listen, one of my favourite Subreddits is r/skyrim. Not because of the quality of the content or the funniness of the posts.

But simply because once in a while, it'll make me smile. Every now and then somebody who just got the game (a thirteen year old game, mind you!) will post a screenshot of something like the thieves' guild symbols and ask "What's this?"

And every time I am reminded of the XKCD comic. They are one of today's 10'000 and that's beautiful. They get to discover sometging I've already discovered years ago, and I can't help but smile, as I hope my ancestors smiled down at me when I started my first fire or foraged for my first wild berries.

#skyrim #reddit #xkcd

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!!! el wiwi !!!