duck91s

[duck91s]

i wanna be the guy who comes up with the punishments for cartoon characters

#cartoons #looney tunes #bojack horseman #incel #blacklivesmatter #alllivesmatter

[duck91s]

ive started vibing with phonk ever since i got hit in the head really hard by that shovel

#phonk #phonk music

[duck91s]

my girlfriend pity fucks me because im autistic but i bet she regrets it now after i sat on her chest giggling really loud and clapping my hands and then punched her in the face until she stopped moving

#neurodivergent #symptoms #nonverbal #dating advice

[duck91s]

at the cafe pulling your computer charger out of the outlet for no reason and then pinning you and sitting on your chest and striking you on the face again and again

#incel #blacklivesmatter #black women #cafe aesthetic

[duck91s]

paying for a manicure for my fat girlfriend leshauna like she wont just fuck it up eating takis right after

#takis #latina #leshauna

[duck91s]

i got a job at dairy queen but i fucked up the ice cream flip so many times that my manager had to come up to me and go “…buddy,”

#dairy queen #down syndrome #incel

[duck91s]

if i got my hands on you id trap you in a washing mashine and spin it around and sock you in the back of the head every two spins

#incel #blacklivesmatter #metal gear solid

[duck91s]

middle school choir teacher: mamamweeweweweeefafasseee do! me: this shit is so fuckin boring

[duck91s]

splitting my molar down the middle trying to prove the jawbreaker wrong

[duck91s]

forgot my house was bugged and i ripped a fat one… so embarassed.

[duck91s]

everytime i walk over a tight rope in a video game i have to hold my breath or i get the shakes...

[duck91s]

scooping the week old milk and cereal out of a bowl and washing my face with it cause the county turned my water off for filling my pool with my sink.

[duck91s]

sneaking cheese into a climber's chalk bag so he has a healthy snack during the long journey up

[duck91s]

spilled my clam chowder falling down the whole flight of stairs cause i was staring at my coworker's ass

[duck91s]

id compare spanking it to getting in the groove but a casual like you wouldnt have any experience with that. really, if you need advice just talk to someone who actually has time for you. until now i have to refresh myself with a few shots of everclear and a peppermint essential oil crotch bath

[duck91s]

fuck i really just want to get back to playing titanfall. cant ofc after my roof collapsed on this dogshit computer. cant fucking run anything and it crashes every five fucking minutes. check your house for mold and mildew folks.

[duck91s]

setting up a bunch of blow dryers around my house to cool it off