cricrithings

[cricrithings]

The blueberry tart moral quandary has been very fun to ponder! Thank you for sharing it with us. I think the real question, however, is what each of your animals would think about ordering two slices of tart under the circumstances

You're right, that IS the true question here. Let's situate this in a universe where blueberry tart is safe & delicious to eat for all animal species.

CHICKENS. The chickens would definitely want that second helping of tart because chickens live in a solipsistic moral universe and would hesitate to share tart even if it was their dying sister's last wish. However if you place two slices of tart on the ground for 2 chickens, they will immediately and violently start fighting each other over the same slice, thus giving you the opportunity to discreetly retrieve the first slice for yourself. Moreover, if a chicken manages to break off half of the slice and starts running like hell to go eat it elsewhere in peace, the other chicken will take off after her instead of eating the other half happily by herself. If they then break this half in two while fighting over it, they will resume fighting over that half of the half, allowing you to retrieve 3/4 of the second slice. And so on. This is Zeno's paradox applied to chickens and tart: the hens will spend the rest of eternity fighting over diminishing crumbs while you get almost all of the second slice back (albeit broken in increasingly minuscule halves.)

CATS. Not only would the cats want that second slice regardless of who else wants it, they would also sit & start grooming themselves on the rest of the pie with great serenity, rendering it inedible for anyone else. However, my original post established that the pies were under large bell jars. Two of my three cats are (to their everlasting torment) stymied by this sadistic human invention. If the bell jar is heavy enough that you can't push it off the table (a popular strategy), then Mascarille and Merricat will just circle it a few times, ram their faces into the glass, do a full body swipe against it in case this might open a secret door, and then walk away in frustration. Morille on the other hand is a cat possessed of extreme patience, diabolical intelligence and acute interest in forbidden food. She will get the tart no matter how long she has to lie in wait.

DOG. Pandolf would not want a second slice or even a first one, if he is made to understand that this might make other people sad. The thing with Pandolf is, he can smell disappointment. His great big nose picks up on every particle of human disappointment in the air and they go straight to his heart. He is also too polite to even defend his bone from thieving chickens. There's no way he would claim any tart at all unless someone gave it to him and made it clear they would be happy for him to eat it. However Pandolf is very cute when he sits there with a lolling tongue, happy for others to have a good time, and there is also no way one or several persons wouldn't give him their slice of tart. He would definitely end up with tart.

LLAMAS. Pampelune is the matriarch and since her duties involve dying to protect her herd in case of predator attacks, she considers it her prerogative to eat first and as much as she damn pleases in compensation. She would get two slices. I believe Poldine would choose to have only one slice and kiss everyone in the restaurant on the cheek for good measure, and I also believe she would actually get zero tart. As shown in the salt video, Poldine understands her place in the pasture hierarchy (the one who eats last) and has to resort to subterfuge to get even 1 lick of salt while others are gorging themselves. She will be very dependent on other people's temperance and decency to get any tart (so, Pandolf is her best bet.) Meanwhile Pampérigouste is trying to figure out how to escape the restaurant undetected to go on an adventure while the sheeple are talking about tart. She will get one or two or three slices but only if they can facilitate her various stratagems (for example, to bribe a guard at the door.)

The FISH—do not have the cognitive abilities to worry about morals but more importantly, do not experience soul-deep desires in the way the birds and mammals in this list do. My fish live in a smooth and quiet world where the gods make food rain from the sky every day. In this luminescent existence of untroubled abundance their capacity for longing has atrophied. They do not understand what wanting tart means, let alone the complex philosophical agonies humans can put themselves through when faced with culinary conundrums.

DONKEY. Pirlouit's first instinct would be to claim all the tart he can eat and then some. However donkeys and fish sit at opposite ends of the philosophical spectrum; Pirlouit strikes me as an animal who would be interested in exploring the ethical ramifications of the issue, as an intellectual exercise. 70% of his life consists in quiet deep ponderings. I think Pirlouit could get distracted ruminating the blueberry tart quandary in light of the rich philosophical heritage of donkey civilisation, and arrive too late to get any tart by the time he determined whether one or two slices is the right answer. Kind of like that time he got distracted by his need for revenge and was late for breakfast and the llamas had already claimed the hay.

IN CONCLUSION.

#hehe #the blueberry tart dilemma

[cricrithings]

can someone please send me that post abt washing your sheets "climb in my brothers"

#ah yes #it took me 20 years to realize that i can just zip up my duvet cover to prevent this ...

[cricrithings]

fandom sucks now I never see PSAs for writers about what can and cannot be used as lube

#ah #the never ending lube discourse ;) #i once changed butter to olive oil after publishing because it seemed less squicky #though i guess butter would work as well (if not combined with a condom) #sword oil in medieval times wasn't mineral oil but plant based oil if i remember correctly #so why not

[cricrithings]

...

#michael sheen

[cricrithings]

Pro-tip for reheating leftover pizza: Put it in a (non-stick) pan with a lid. Put the pan on your stove by medium (or less) heat and wait a few minutes. The result will be hot and crispy but not dry.

(Yeah the post wasn't abot this but still.)

you came back wrong and i am racked with guilt because i cannot bear to see you like this and i should have let you rest. i loved you so much that i defied death itself but i do not think either of us are happy

#gothic pizza

[cricrithings]

"Ich mag deine Füßfuddeln."

"Danke, die hab ich von Frank-Walter Steinmeier geklaut."

#snicker #ich wollte mich schon über schnöör beschweren #weil ich das noch nie gehört habe #dann habe ich die anderen gelesen ...

[cricrithings]

FWIW, "mauve" was one of the coal-tar dyes developed in the mid-19th century that made eye-wateringly bright clothing fashionable for a few decades.

It was an eye-popping magenta purple

HOWEVER, like most aniline dyes, it faded badly, to a washed-out blue-grey ...

...which was the color ignorant youngsters in the 1920s associated with “mauve”.

(This dress is labeled "mauve" as it is the color the above becomes after fading).

They colored their vision of the past with washed-out pastels that were NOTHING like the eye-popping electric shades the mid-Victorians loved. This 1926 fashion history book by Paul di Giafferi paints a hugely distorted, I would say dishonest picture of the past.

Ever since then this faded bluish lavender and not the original electric eye-watering hot pink-purple is the color associated with the word “mauve”.

#fashion history #fascinating #mauve

[cricrithings]

My conversations with children

#great answer #i'll remember that

[cricrithings]

Nothing lasts forever... ___

ID: Digitially painted Good Omens fanart; a series of one long strip of images cut into smaller images. The first panel reads "Oh Crowley", all subsequent images depict Crowley during a different era. The first is him as we see him at the season 2 finale, the second at the season 1 finale, the third as he appeared in 1967, followed by him in 1941 holding the gun from the bullet catch scene, then we see him as he appeared in 1601, followed by how he appeared in 41 AD, next is him in 33 AD during the crucifixtion, followed by him dressed as Bildad the Shuhite in 2500 BC, second to last is his appearance in 3004 BC before the flood and finally we see him as he appeared on the wall of Eden. The long strip of images is followed by a series of images showing angel Crowley; initially without wings and by himself, before we zoom out to see Aziraphale first looking at him and then glancing away with a worried expression. End ID.

#crowley #good omens #good omens fanart #art

[cricrithings]

Hi! All the titles sound intriguing but I'd like to ask about the Shetland fic. Your Shetland x Lewis crossover is what got me hooked on that fandom in the first place! Thank you! =)

Funny you should mention Lead me wild to your dark roads, because The finish line (a good place to start) is actually the unintended second part of the now three part series. Part two is Jimmy and Duncan back at the house after driving back from the airport. Part three is James and Robbie (and Laura) in New Zealand (and James texting Duncan).

The James texting Duncan part is how this fic came about. I realized that I needed to know what happened between Jimmy and Duncan before I could have Duncan tell James about it, and while figuring that out I ended up writing 2/3 of a fic.

“Who was that?” Jimmy asks, when Cassie leaves the kitchen to put her things in her room.  “James?” Duncan asks. Jimmy isn’t fooled by Duncan’s playing dumb, he never is, but Duncan would like to put this conversation off as long as possible when Cassie could be back down any minute.  Jimmy nods, giving Duncan a look that’s more than halfway to not pleased. “Aye, James.”  Duncan shrugs. “He’s a friend.” “A friend like [ woman Jimmy caught Duncan having wine with ] is a friend?”  Jimmy may be accusing Duncan of something that he absolutely did do, but it still stings. He didn’t regret it when he woke up in James’ bed the next morning, that’s not why he left, he left to make things simpler. He doesn’t regret it now, but he does regret hugging James in the airport in front of Jimmy, giving himself away. DI James Hathaway thinks Jimmy is in love with Duncan, but the narrowed brows and pinched line of his mouth say something else entirely. “What’s that supposed to mean?”  “You said you and Mary were on the outs, but you were trying to sort things out. I’ve been letting you stay here so you could…” Jimmy sighs, long suffering, closes his eyes for a moment then opens them again, gaze accusing. “It’s men now as well?” “It’s always been men as well.” 

Ask me about my wips

#sounds like something i want to read #shetland #wip #greenapricot #i've read some great stuff by them

[cricrithings]

I'm moderately immunocompromised due to the medications I'm on that suppress my immune system

I'm also...

a university student. I'm in your classes

a community member. I'm in your public spaces

someone who does my own groceries. I'm in your grocery stores

someone who takes medications. I'm in your pharmacies

someone who likes to eat out with friends. I'm in your restaurants

someone who shops. I'm in your malls and shopping centers

someone who appreciates local artists. I'm at your markets

I am not elderly. you cannot look at me and see that I am high risk. You can't know to avoid me if you leave the house with covid or the flu but covid or the flu could kill me

new covid guidelines are suggesting that you can leave isolation while you're sick but that you should avoid high risk people. you cannot do this, we are everywhere. we look like elderly people on ventilators but we also look like fit young adults and energetic children. you cannot spot someone high risk. you cannot avoid us. if you're sick stay home

#stay home #or if you absolutely can't at least wear a mask

[cricrithings]

save me 90s terry farrell

#terry farrell #beautiful people #star trek deep space nine

[cricrithings]

but first...

#technical manuals be like that #m*a*s*h

[cricrithings]

Photographers all know about polarizing filters. They remove reflections off the surfaces of objects. We use them to see into water or windows that are obscured by those reflections. But anything with an even slightly glossy surface has a layer of reflection on top. So if you have a shiny green plant, it can remove the shiny and reveal a very saturated green underneath. Polarizers also remove a lot of scattered and reflected light from the sky. Which reveals a deep blue color you didn't even know was there.

Here is a photo I took of my circular polarizer.

And the first thing I noticed when walking outside during the eclipse was the color of everything was more saturated, just like in that circle. Apparently, an eclipse significantly reduces polarized light and I got this creepy feeling because I was only ever used to seeing the world like that through the viewfinder of my camera.

The other thing I noticed was my outdoor lights. I leave them on all the time because I never remember to turn them on at night. And usually the sun will render them barely visible during the day. On a very sunny day they almost look like they are off.

But you can clearly see they are shining and even flaring the camera during the eclipse.

Our eyes adjust to lighting changes very well so it was hard to tell how much dimmer things were, but that is a good indication. I took this photo a few minutes ago and you can see how dim the lights appear after the moon has fucked off.

I did a calculation using the exposure settings between these two photos. The non-eclipse photo has 7 f-stops more light. That is 128 times or 12,700% more light.

A partial Pringle eclipse cut the sun's light by 99.2% and somehow our eyes adjusted to make it seem like a normal sunny day (with weird ass saturated colors).

#eclipse #i remember that weird light #from 1999 when we had an eclipse that was visible in germany #update: the math was corrected by op in the notes if you want to look closer

[cricrithings]

New discourse: it's actually predatory to date someone with a different star sign than you, because the differences in your personalities means you'll never be able to have exactly the same life experiences, thus leaving a knowledge and power gap between the two of you which will inevitably lead to an abusive relationship!

also if you're a Sag and you're dating a Taurus, that means you're secretly seeking a May-December relationship, which is age gap coded!

#snort #i wouldn't be surprised to see that 'discourse' for real sometime on tumblr

[cricrithings]

Syrian courtyard

#beautiful #syria

[cricrithings]

ich hasse christian lindner ich hasse christian lindner ich hasse christian lindner ich hasse christian lindner ich hasse christian lindner

#hass ist zu viel der ehre #er kotzt mich an