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gegyjiji on Instagram

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still fuckin hate that “bee-free honey” that’s made from……… apples. bitch who you think sexed up those apples

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you would not believe the yellows this generous world gives us

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First you procrastinate on the task because it is not a big enough deal to get done urgently. Then you procrastinate on the task because it has become such a big deal that doing it is overwhelming. You would think that this implies a middle point where it is just big enough of a deal to get done easily, however the inherent perversity of the universe's causal geometry prevents this

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Biblically accurate Falin

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It would be real fucked up if anteaters and aardvarks and armadillos and pangolins were all like herons. Instead of like themselves the trundlers

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im going to (remembers i cant kill myself) fix my heart and build an altar where it swells

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Falin's chimera design is so good I was mesmerized by her every time she showed up. Then I reached the part where Laios explain how absurd she is because she has a way too small mouth to feed such a huge body and I felt so guilty... I'm sorry miss Falin I was so engrossed by your glorious form that I didn't notice you were ill bred just like a little pug... Please forgive me..

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I was at a Halloween party a friend was hosting the other week, and he was baking some truly excellent dishes. He pulled something out of the oven and said (something to the effect of) "Do NOT touch this dish. It just came out of the oven and will burn you into next Sunday."

Other friend responded something like, "Oh cool, a dish that causes time-travel," and I responded, "Well yeah. You hold on to the super hot dish and it makes you travel forward through time at a rate of 1 second per second."

This. It turns out. Was a critical error on my part. Because another friend turned to me real wide-eyed and asked, "Was that a reference?" and I was like "What?" and he was like "Homestuck," and I was like "What?"

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Easter egg for office workers: if you go onto Excel and press ctrl+left, then ctrl+down, you will reach cell XFD1048576. If you put a dot in there, then ctrl+A and fill every cell in black, you can then print 34 million black pages from your office printer and get fired

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when I see something dated 2019 I think “oh that’s not too long ago” and then I remember that 2019 was not only five years ago but those five years have somehow contained several lifetimes

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whats the fucking point of having laws if people can keep making led headlights

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whats the fucking point of having laws if people can keep making led headlights

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whats the fucking point of having laws if people can keep making led headlights

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what do you think of the moon

I hope it stayes where it is

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You wouldnt last an hour in the asylum where they raised me