chloberries

[chloberries]

styros are satisfying but the healing process is a bitch

#e4ting dis0rder #fat girls #mental illness #tw depressing thoughts #tw ed diet #tw self destructive thoughts #sorry for being depressing #self h@rm #styrotwt #styroblr #beanstwt #beansblr #triggering content #tw cvtting

[chloberries]

fuck sakes man. my sister found my blade. and then she confronts me and asks, why dont i just slap myself. i tell her its not the same and she says just do it harder.

[chloberries]

It’s funny,

The way people look at you.

Once they know what you’ve done.

Eyes flick down to the arms,

Back to the face.

Then back down again.

They can’t quite look you in the eye,

Not after they know.

Not when they know what you’ve done.

Because darling,

After they know,

You are as fragile as spun glass.

And as damaged as ashes

[chloberries]

bought blades 🏃‍♀️👍

[chloberries]

i just want to be able to have my meltdowns alone in peace without the fear of someone barging in and seeing me in my most vulnerable state

[chloberries]

i really just need a fucking blade right now.

[chloberries]

ill never forget the day when my mother said im not even making an effort.

ive been trying for years. im tired. im exhausted.

my mind is self destructive.

and im not strong enough to combat it.

i cant keep fighting.

im sorry that i cant do better.

[chloberries]

i’ll always have extreme hate for myself no matter what

[chloberries]

I wish I could kill myself and take my body with me. I don't just want to die, I want to completely disappear. I never wanted to exist.

[chloberries]

why is it so difficult for you to understand that i'm not being dramatic? that i genuinely feel like the world around me is on fire & all you're doing is just watching me burn alive.

[chloberries]

I really feel like im losing. Like I feel so controlled by my trauma, anxiety, depression, disorders and it's overpowering me. It controls my life. Everything in my life. I feel so paralyzed and so fucked up. Why can't I just be normal. How does everyone else make it look so easy. I'm tired, exhausted, really.

[chloberries]

i can't get rid of that feeling that i wasn't made for this world. my brain has malfunctioned, i'm an error. i shouldn't be here

[chloberries]

yesterday marked one year since i first cut.

#e4ting dis0rder #fat girls #mental illness #tw depressing thoughts #tw ed diet #tw self destructive thoughts #tw self destructive behavior #self h@rm #self mutalition #cutt1ng #styrotwt #styroblr #beansblr #beanstwt

[chloberries]

"be yourself" thats the worst possible advice you could ever fucking give me i do not have a default personality

[chloberries]

REBLOG IF ITS OKAY TO TALK TO YOU.

Please.

[chloberries]

i just want everyone to look at me n be extremely worried for my health

[chloberries]

the feminine urge to carve ur skin cause it’s the only thing that feels real