chaoslaura

[chaoslaura]

the simplicity of lactase supplements is so funny to me. it costs like $4 to circumvent evolutionary biology. want to eat dairy but your body doesn’t produce the enzyme necessary to digest lactose? the devs haven’t patched that yet but you can download a mod

[chaoslaura]

It is a real tragedy that English does not have a diminutive suffix. There is no way to properly translate that from Dutch to English and it's tragic because in many cases the diminutive adds a layer of meaning that you can only translate with like a dozen extra words

[chaoslaura]

[chaoslaura]

i step out onto stage clad in full corpse paint and death metal regalia and start playing the most middle-of-the-road soft rock you've heard since 1974

[chaoslaura]

#uh never #why should I

[chaoslaura]

[chaoslaura]

I need to (remembers to not make casual suicide jokes in order to encourage a more outwardly positive mindset and healthy conversational environment in my day to day life) kill myself

[chaoslaura]

[chaoslaura]

i’ll show you REAL bisexuality *runs directly into the doorframe for some reason*

[chaoslaura]

I am begging fanfic writers to stop worrying about romanticising abuse or whatever and start worrying about picking a consistent tense.

[chaoslaura]

Whatever the case, feel free to write long-winded explanations in the tags, I WILL read them!

#wellll you could say Germany doesn't have independance day #theoretically east germany gained independence from UdSSR but it's not celebrated like that #only the joining with west germany to form a whole country again

[chaoslaura]

First you procrastinate on the task because it is not a big enough deal to get done urgently. Then you procrastinate on the task because it has become such a big deal that doing it is overwhelming. You would think that this implies a middle point where it is just big enough of a deal to get done easily, however the inherent perversity of the universe's causal geometry prevents this

[chaoslaura]

i don´t think im capable of understanding what twitter people talk about anymore

[chaoslaura]

Need the bisexual Nokia so bad

[chaoslaura]

[chaoslaura]

best of the onion

[chaoslaura]

dear god please let our new baby octopus feel confident enough to move out of her corner hiding spot today while i’m on exhibits so i can see her properly for the first time amen