blitz0hno

[blitz0hno]

you cant ever let yourself forget what it felt like to be 15. how adults treated you. being treated without a shred of respect because people think youre too young to have thoughts and feelings of your own. the lack of autonomy. you cant ever forget that because if you do you might become the kind of adult who treats kids like theyre not people

#HAHA THIS IS WHERE IT ALL BEGAN #THIS IS WHAT TUMBLR IS ALL ABOUT BABY YOU HAVE NO IDEA #HOW MANY THINGS WE TALKED ABOUT BECAUSE OF THIS POST #it wasn't about our blorbo but now it's about like 3-4 of them #but it's also abt all the irl ppl who deal w it too #WE GET TO HAVE BOTH WOOOO #anyway so true prev #i love my mutuals sm

[blitz0hno]

Okay I'm too shy to add these tags to a recent post I saw but it's this one.

#i............ #no wait let me add to this #not only is this #kirisaki shidou #it's also #john milgram #john forgot what it's like to be a child so fast he's a complete asshat to amane

#TYSM YOU UNDERSTAND #blorboposting intensifies #i can't wait to see how john interacts w the others in the future #n you are so right about the contrasting themes and philosophical implications #milgram is SO good for this stuff no wonder there r so many words!! #also stealing the image lmao #amane deserves better part 9274727 #mikoto almost definitely got “put in his place” growing up #even current host mikoto asks a lot of questions and authority figures don't like that #meanwhile amane was absolutely punished for any sort of “childishness” #they both use an idea of “maturity” to try to protect themselves #i wonder if we'll see the cycle of violence end or continue throughout t3 #john milgram #john kayano #amane momose #milgram theory #long post

[blitz0hno]

no bc the more I read John's dialogue the more I realize he is INSANELY rude lmao I don't talk about that enough

#like when i say this man has NERVE #like we knew that when he attacked es etc #but mannnn he fr does and says what he feels like #mikotos “dream” indeed ? #bro was NOT careful what he wished for 🔥🔥 #yknow i think i have talked about it enough today tho #me (weed) when i yap #mikotoposting #john milgram #again

[blitz0hno]

Nobody ever asks for an entire novel in their mentions but here we are I love psychoanalysis I get to look at my Blorbos and say Why Are You Like This

#i am so normal about milgram i swear #i am so normal #i am normal #im just hyperverbal sorry lol

[blitz0hno]

Yeah like I don't think he even meant to be directly aggressive w Amane but like.... There's such an air of "acknowledge my presence/respect me" that John doesn't realize is just So Pushy. And since he doesn't know what being a kid is like, he sees Amane and thinks "what does she know she's a kid." Mikoto himself in the first voice drama insists that she COULDN'T be a murderer (Shidou parallel ❤️). It's an insidious sort of dehumanization that paints Amane as less capable of understanding these traumatic experiences than the adults around her. It's not entirely John's fault given social norms etc. but since he's already temperamental and on edge he definitely has a "go away child" vibe I hope we see him work on.

(THIS GOT LONG SORRY???? TL;DR John is the Person Who Can't Be Pushed Around Mikoto wanted to be, and that's a nice fantasy but in his reality makes him Super Rude and Aggressive but he doesn't see it as a big deal because his only goal is to placate and protect. He wants the same thick skin from others that he has and disregards that "a kid" could have that at all.)

It's def no excuse to treat Amane as lesser or antagonize her for social engagement. John is kinda really like a poorly behaved dog but as a complicated person if that makes sense? (Sorry dog motif my beloved). He was at full awareness and maturity all at once, and born into harsh/traumatic circumstances at that. When he sees others in his circumstances he wants the same maturity out of them, and his efforts to be "friendly" come off really forced. Even worse, he already doesn't see Amane as an equal bc it's the "adult world" he's focused on, but his way of navigating those tendencies is... Not ideal lol

John is, ESPECIALLY by Japanese standards?

REALLY REALLY REALLY DISRESPECTFUL LIKE SECONDHAND EMBARRASSMENT "WANT TO DIE" DISRESPECTFUL!! like this dude just Does What He Wants All The Time and y'know what. Go Him in terms of capitalism and self-defense all that, but it makes him less than sociable. At the same time he's the worst, imo, w Amane and Es precisely because he does not expect them to "understand" what he's anticipating. Nor does he want them to.

In my experience w DID and research etc., it's very common for protectors to be in fight-or-flight almost 24/7. Expecting the worst from everyone, he IS a straight up misanthrope hard agreement there it's So Sad because all he does is for Mikoto. John is compared to a newborn for a reason; he only knows how to call out for help, and when nobody answers he must fend for himself. His rapid understanding of social norms seems full of toxic positivity and a certain simplistic 'trust no one" idea. But this lack of knowledge combined with hypervigilance makes him A) curious and observant and B) Very Blunt. Social norms don't matter when you conceivably "could" die any moment.

And such seemingly defenseless kids knowing those horrors? Mikoto don't wanna comprehend that bc it would mean facing his own trauma; he must protect him type shit. But John still needs to connect w the people around him when he fronts; so he asks Amane something one would "expect" a child to react to. He doesn't respect that A) 12 year olds can already have a lot going on and B) she is as capable as any adult of the actions and emotions of killing someone. Treating her like he'd treat any elementary schooler got him a reaction he didn't understand.

I also feel like Mikoto himself would die of embarrassment if he could ever read back on how John talked. His "Ore" pronoun alone could get him fired (afaik correct me if not?). And this rudeness gets worse when combined with his condescension of Amane; she repeatedly gets frustrated by that kind of thing with all the adults, and it contrasts with Haruka who wants to be treated as a child but also sees them in a bad light.

Hating so much as seeing children in public etc. is kind of a common sentiment online now, and I think it really is rooted in trauma that a lot of people have. If kids are with good parents you could be confused, if they're with bad parents you could get angry, and the shouts and noises kids themselves make could even bring on PTSD that people aren't ready to face. Unfortunately, this does not help the case of a kid who has more than survived enough to be talked to on equal terms with her adult counterparts, while being protected as any child should be. It really is a matter of respect and treating people as fully human no matter what, and I love that theme. There truly are no excuses and that goes for how John regards children. Being inherently suspicious, and only focusing on protecting Mikoto, he sees them as threats first. If he doesn't "disappear" in t3 (and I doubt he will even if he tries), hopefully he'll be nicer and talk to the others more like people than potential threats.

Okay I'm too shy to add these tags to a recent post I saw but it's this one.

#i............ #no wait let me add to this #not only is this #kirisaki shidou #it's also #john milgram #john forgot what it's like to be a child so fast he's a complete asshat to amane

#GOD THIS GOT LONG tldr john hates minors guys /j #john milgram #john kayano #amane momose #milgram theory #yapping so much #mikotoposting #johns pronouns will get him fired because of woke #lol in all seriousness tho YEAH #john def lashes out because of fear and uncertainty anout the others around him #can't wait to learn the backstory on that one lmao

[blitz0hno]

I was rewatching the first trial interrogation and I remembered this conversation - oddly enough, innocuous as it seems I think I found more confirmation that it was John.

From the minigrams and the timelines I get the sense that John, when masking, tends to be OVERLY friendly with the others because he sees Mikoto as someone who is social and nice to people. I think he's trying to get on good terms with them by acting so cheery, so Mikoto has an easier time. It explains "Halloween," too; as usual, John forgets to keep things "professional."

Mikoto himself doesn't really seem to know about Amane's demeanor at at all:

It's such a small detail, but since the timeline convos correlate with the story it makes sense that John may have asked Amane what he did to calm his own nerves

Okay I'm too shy to add these tags to a recent post I saw but it's this one.

#i............ #no wait let me add to this #not only is this #kirisaki shidou #it's also #john milgram #john forgot what it's like to be a child so fast he's a complete asshat to amane

#mikotoposting #mikoto milgram #john milgram #amane milgram #i love the little details in this project that line up #cuz like idk it MIGHT feel like a reach #but “mikoto” was talking to amane like a friend/child and now her doesn't seem to know anything about her #john stop yapping challenge 99% fail

[blitz0hno]

i made their i2 illustrations except for i didn't change the outfits because i'm lazy. and also i wrote their profiles and voicelines. a lot of text under cut

4th Dimension

Star | Mental DPS | Heal Medium: Individual Perception Inspiration: Crossing of Reflected Rays [Star] Mirage of Own Mind

Garments: — Default Indulging in fancy clothes is a sin. Most precious things are those that are impossible to touch. — No Time, No Space Even when the basics of our world stop to matter, I'll see you, like colors hidden in the white light.

An arcanist's work. Exhibited in the first half of 20th century for 25 years. Completed in Summer, on June 17. The exhibition had to frequently move and postpone the opening before settling in the Union of Soviet Socialist Republics.

First Encounter: Hey, care to be a drawing model for me from time to time? Ah, excuse me for skipping unnecessary steps. Like hello, nice to meet you? If I haven't turned away yet, isn't it obvious I'm glad to meet you? 

Suitcase Climate: Why the hell do you call this weather chilly? Just what kind of world do you live in? I'll throw you into the snow! Then you'll see! 

To the Future: There's nothing that you can do about the future coming, and nothing keeps in a stable state ever, so just avoid thinking about it at worst, and convince yourself that it's going to be alright on its own at best. 

Idle: Hm-m. Hm-m... Hm-m... When given the chance, I'll take revenge on you for abandoning me.

Greetings: Oh, look who decided to come! Felt up for a small talk out of sudden? Huh? For your knowledge, I can't stand small talks! 

Morning: Maybe I should go to sleep soon? I think I'll be going to sleep soon. ...Oh, I haven't noticed you. I'm not available for a chat, I'm sleeping. 

Bond: Morning: (scribbling) Don't look! Don't look! ...I'm just noting down drawing ideas to work on later. What if I were writing my deepest secrets? That's really rude of you! 

Night: Ms. Timekeeper, can you tell the ballerina girl to shut up? Her singing is getting on my nerves, but she's not listening to me. ...Even if she uses "it's a lullaby" as an excuse, I hate lullabies the same as any other songs!

Bond: Night: Is everyone going to sleep? Will you stay awake? On second thought, it's not like I needed your company. Go! Go! Shoo! 

Hat and Hair: What's the point of brushing one's hair? How does it become better? Maybe it's merely a plan to sell more unneeded hairbrushes to you. Have you considered this?

Sleeves and Hands: Eh-h... My gloves are always covered in paint, so be careful when touching them... Besides... Well... Hm... I'm not a fan of my hands being touched. 

Clothing and Torso: People who are obsessed with their appearance think they rule the world! I don't care! Even if I cared, I don't have money! Who do you think you are to make conclusions about my personality from my clothes? What an annoyance! 

Hobby: The human mind has its limits, and each individual brain has its individual limits, so it's all in all silly to search for the "objective reality"! Rather, isn't the whole fun in millions of subjective realities coexisting? Well, it does get a bit lonely if you think about us being isolated in our own versions of the world.

Chitchat I: Hm-m... Let's see... Just as a what-if... Would you get mad at me for accidentally splashing the paint all over the floor? 

Chitchat II: Everyone says that fresh air walks calm them down, but going outside only irritates me further. I don't get it. How does it make me inferior that I want to always sit at home and do my things? If you had cold weather 8 months a year, you would understand. 

Intimacy:  Isn't it marvelous, the way our dearest friends are those we met by pure chance? A long set of decisions from both sides to end up united in this moment, a few talks and you can't imagine what you'd be like without them. Like rays of light intersecting to create a color. The friendship between you and me... The color is silver. 

Monologue: They invented cameras, so artists are no longer needed to capture the moments forever. You must depict what you see... In the way that is more complicated yet simpler than replicating the objects in front of you. What is your own vision of the shape and color? Can you convey what's on your mind with single dots and lines? 

Deployment: Guess I'll act like the calm one.

Battle Victory: Is it over? Am I allowed to tremble now? 

Yakov 

Mineral | Reality Support | Control  Medium: Draft Inspiration: Crystalline Carbon [Mineral] Abandoned Authenticity 

Garments: — Default Don't look back at what you might have been. — Tracing Paper An art material made to have low opacity, allowing light to pass through.

An arcanist's work. Exhibited in the beginning of 20th century for 21 years. Completed in Winter, on January 26. Exhibited in St. Petersburg of the Russian Empire.

First Encounter: Eh... Um... It's not like we're going to be friends, so why would I introduce myself? ...The hell do you mean we're going to be friends?

Suitcase Climate: The weather is constantly bad... It feels like I'm carrying a curse...

To the Future: The problems should be solved as they come. I can't solve even the past ones, much less prepare for the future.

Idle: (scribbling) (pencil breaking) Uh, d-did I press too hard again? No way... 

Greetings: —Ugh! Why do you have such quiet footsteps?! What do you mean it's me who's unaware of my surroundings? What's this blame-shifting? 

Morning: The day starting makes me depressed... Like I need to hurry up and do something... And my mind is going to fight me this whole time...

Bond: Morning: Is it Alcyone singing? Well, we usually spent mornings preparing the scene... Perhaps she's growing impatient from not receiving as much attention as she used to.

Night: The day ending makes me depressed... Like I've meaninglessly wasted all this time... There was no point in living through today, there will be no point in living through tomorrow...

Bond: Night: No thank you. I'm having too many negative thoughts to fall asleep even if I want to, so I'll stay awake until my brain goes completely numb.

Hat and Hair: You people live in a better world where you don't have disordered sleep, I guess... Well, I'm not that lucky. Of course I look tired...

Sleeves and Hands: My sketches are always too messy... How do others manage to do them delicately? 

Clothing and Torso: Both moving and staying in place bring you the same amount of pain. Really, are there hobbies that don't make your whole body hurt? If I can find one, I might abandon being an artist.

Hobby: It's impossible to become popular in the fields that everyone else is pursuing, but I'm not anyone special to take on a niche path and bring it to light... Hm... Just do what you like? I don't really like anything that much.

Chitchat I: Even if there's absolutely nothing left to do, I can't help falling asleep when I'm trying to read... I'm only interested in the illustrations, but I need to know the text to illustrate...

Chitchat II: I was given the ability to use a pencil, but not to create. Is it actual art if I'm parasitizing on already existing stories? 

Intimacy: Being yourself is bad as it will always make you fall behind... If you want to improve, you need to become a shadow that absorbs... This is the kind of place I'm raised in. I feel homesick for a home that I've never known.

Monologue: Art is personal, but it's hard to consider something art without the presence of its audience... Artists are seen as geniuses, but only geniuses are artists, otherwise you're wasting your time, and no one including you is entertained by it... It would be nice to get a response to anything you want to share, but in the end, you must say only what's liked and acceptable...

Deployment: Please, no more thinking...

Battle Victory: I didn't even do anything... Right? See? Better to not ask more of me.

Alcyone 

Beast | Mental DPS | Nasty Wound Medium: Ballet Inspiration: Paradise Bird of the Underworld [Beast] Calamity-Bringing Lullaby 

Garments: — Default Remember to be a delicate young lady, princess of the night birds. — Unwritten Fairy Tale Come take me company, right to the underworld.

A mixed work. Exhibited in the beginning of 20th century for 21 years. Completed in Spring, on March 25. First exhibition location unknown, later moved for exhibition in St. Petersburg of the Russian Empire.

First Encounter: Come closer, come closer... You're special, so I'll tell you anything you want to know about me... But only as whispers, hidden from everyone else.

Suitcase Climate: I'm used to the grey sky, so I'm not really fond of the sun. There are people whose opinion is completely different from mine though. They won't stop whining about bad weather.

To the Future: Beauty will save the world. Do you know this saying? As long as we continue to create, we'll be finding, conveying, spreading hope... Nothing special about the art itself — it's merely the power of human emotion that it holds.

Idle: Hm? Is no one coming to my performance? 

Greetings: Did you come at the sound of my voice? Is someone complaining that it's too loud? This makes singing only more fun.

Morning: I need to stretch my body and prepare my voice. Warm herbal tea would be nice to start the day.

Bond: Morning: I'll bring my drawing album to breakfast. A few quick study sketches of people around me are going to be a great exercise. Yes, I'll make a few sketches, like... Maybe two.

Night: In summer, there is a period of white nights in my hometown. With the tender blue and yellow of the twilight, all the fears go away. Let's celebrate with a lot of performances, right on the streets! 

Bond: Night: If you wish, I'll gladly sing you a lullaby. But I don't hold responsibility for the effect it might have on you, alright? He-he.

Hat and Hair: Oh, was my headpiece tilted? I should peek in the mirror more often...

Sleeves and Hands: Want to invite me to a dance? Be more gentle when taking my hand, then I'll consider.

Clothing and Torso: My body is completely human-like, definitely human.

Hobby: "If you're a costume designer, you must also do your job and create drafts"... Hmph. Isn't it natural that one is an assistant who prepares the visuals, and the other is a leading star who is busy shining on the scene and has no time for trivial matters, like... drawing... Ahem. I should not say it in front of him.

Chitchat I: My favorite part of drawing is lining. Sketches are too messy, and coloring is too complicated. Lines are neat and simple.

Chitchat II: Um... I know that it's hard to resist my charm, but it’s... Aren't there too many of you? —Dear audience, keep your distance from the scene! 

Monologue: Persisting to convey what you want even though giving a form to it is complicated and tiresome — I think it's more precious than running from things when they get too hard... Although the competition between "talent" and "diligence" is an old, old tale.

Intimacy: These name and body of mine are a part of the talented actress' performance off-stage. The secret of the "Paradise Bird"... Come closer so I can whisper it. 

Deployment: Keep your eyes on me.

Battle Victory: I hope you didn't perhaps notice that I might have gotten too loose. I should remember to be a delicate young lady.

#prettyyyyy

[blitz0hno]

fringed iris: rebellion, a lot of friends

acacia: friendship, secret love, elegance

white water lily: pure, innocent

#THIS IS SO COOL OH MY GOD??? #tsumigram #my beloved #the colors r so nice

[blitz0hno]

“If you have time to be on social media, you also have time for…” “If you have time to watch Netflix, you also have time for…” Yeah, but do I have the energy for it? Do I have the emotional and mental capacity for it? Am I pain-free enough for it? Can I focus on it? Can I do it without leaving my bed? Can I safely do it without risk of (physically or emotionally) injuring myself by pushing past my boundaries?

#recovering so much rn #lolllll we feel like ass #can't wait to b over this awful cold #isolating as much as possible but like we live in a van lmao #i wanna do my art sometime today but this post is helping w the shane around Not Doing That

[blitz0hno]

[blitz0hno]

Azami icons ~

like or reblog if you save ♡

#REALLLLL #shes gorgeous ugh my queen

[blitz0hno]

We can access every other account actually woooooo for now lolll

We just got SUSPENDED from INSTAGRAM LMAOOOOO some of us r gonna rage so bad if we lose our account permanently but by god others r actually relieved lmao

If we lose our kagepro meme acc or the system acc tho we'll be pretty fuckin sad

[blitz0hno]

We just got SUSPENDED from INSTAGRAM LMAOOOOO some of us r gonna rage so bad if we lose our account permanently but by god others r actually relieved lmao

If we lose our kagepro meme acc or the system acc tho we'll be pretty fuckin sad

[blitz0hno]

Shout-out to all my fellow transmascs who started mewing before it was cool

#when it became a trend i laughed so much

[blitz0hno]

Billionaires are malicious get this off my fuckin dash

#hate it here #no more billionaires

[blitz0hno]

Let’s work on communicating our insecurities and feelings instead of accusing our loved ones. Making accusations can damage our relationships and isn’t fair to our loved ones.

Try saying “I’m scared I’m going to be alone” instead of “you’re going to leave me like everyone else”.

Try saying “I’m sorry I hurt your feelings. I feel bad about it. Is there anything I can do to help make this better?” instead of “I’m such a failure and a bad person. You shouldn’t be friends with me anymore.”

Try saying “I’m feeling really alone lately. Can we talk more?” instead of “you never talk to me. You must not care about me.”

Our loved ones can’t read our minds. No matter how obvious it might seem to us that we’re struggling, it isn’t necessarily obvious to them. And there are any number of reasons that they might not notice, or might notice and not react (such as trying to respect that they think you don’t want to talk about it and will come to them when you’re ready.)

Your feelings are valid. Your insecurities are valid. But it’s better to deal with these by seeking reassurance in healthy ways or coping mechanisms like self-soothing instead of accusing those you love of bad intentions.

[blitz0hno]

being alive sucks a lot of the time but also every single day i am in love with my friends forever and ever and ever amen

#twice applies to my online friends too friends r my favorite #idc if weve only talked once if ur good to us i would die for you /p