barnabyjr

[barnabyjr]

auctober day one: stims

i didn’t know there was a name for stimming until a couple of years ago, i just thought it was one of my anxious quirks. 

growing up i knew that my body had extra energy to release when i got nervous or excited, but i was always told to hide those little fidgety movements. i would force my body to stay still and suppress the urge to stim, but it would give me these intense full body twitches that would get worse the more i tried to stop them. every panic attack had me writhing around on the floor just shaking in little intervals- it really freaked my family out. after i learned what stimming was, and that my body needed it to regulate everything, i stopped trying to police my behavior and let my body take control. 

it has been so freeing. when i am feeling intense emotions, i don’t think about my body’s reaction anymore cause i know that it’s just trying to process a very confusing world. if i touch something that feels gross to me, i’m going to cringe and shake my hands. if i see a new trailer for a movie that i really want to see, i’m going to jump up and snap my fingers. if i am sad, i need to hug my knees and rock my body.

i love to stim, and i love to see other people stim! autistic joy is absolutely beautiful, and even when i start stimming because of a negative emotion, i am so happy that my body has found a way to handle what my brain can’t.

some of my stims are: singing, dancing, dragging my fingernails across my palm, snapping my fingers, rocking in a chair, tapping my fingers, rubbing my neck, walking around on my tiptoes, and playing with my hair

#auctober #auctober 2022

[barnabyjr]

happy auctober!

october is my favorite month, and i’ve been wanting to do a monthly challenge, so i’ve been waiting for this one by theresa scovil (@autiebiographical). i didn’t know i was on the spectrum until 2020, so i’m still learning about myself and my people. hopefully you’ll get to know me and/or relate to my autistic journey! tag me if you follow this challenge too!

auctober

1. stims

2. info dumping

3. collections

4. animal friends

5. music

6. stim toys

7. hyperfocus

8. diverse

9. comfort food

10. self-care

11. neurodivergent community

12. sensory euphoria

13. alternative communication

14. verbal stims

15. au-dhd

16. unmasking

17. sensory profile

18. lgbtq+

19. echolalia

20. special interests

21. comfort media

22. self-advocacy

23. disabled

24. parallel play

25. hyperlexia

26. plushies

27. textures

28. hereditary

29. gold

30. routines

31. autistic pride

#auctober #auctober 2022

[barnabyjr]

hot shower or cold shower // texting or calling // earbuds or headphones // paperback or hardcover // matte or gel // 12 hour clock or 24 hour clock // blue or green // sunsets or sunrises // tulips or orchids // candle light or moonlight // sci-fi or horror // ball pen or pencil // pandas or koalas // gold or silver // sneakers or boots // denim jacket or leather jacket // pink or purple // chocolate or sour candy // deodorant or perfume // drive-in movie theater or the cinema // pastel colors or neutral/earth tones // lemonade or fruit juice // past or future

tagging anyone who wants to join !

i was tagged by @mirclealignr thank you hun <3

hot shower or cold shower // texting or calling // earbuds or headphones // paperback or hardcover // matte or gel // 12 hour clock or 24 hour clock // blue or green // sunsets or sunrises // tulips or orchids // candle light or moonlight // sci-fi or horror // ball pen or pencil // pandas or koalas // gold or silver // sneakers or boots // denim jacket or leather jacket // pink or purple // chocolate or sour candy // deodorant or perfume // drive-in movie theater or the cinema // pastel colors or neutral/earth tones // lemonade or fruit juice // past or future

tagging: @pixiemunsons @pagesturnandsticktoeachother @kies-carreras @jesper-faheyss @mikesslxt @fxllfaiiry

#i love these sm #ty hayden

[barnabyjr]

an explanation is not owed

#hate how much i relate to this

[barnabyjr]

ty @plumes-de-nuit i love doing these !

love at first sight or slowly growing fond of someone? | love letters or mixtapes? | hand kisses or kisses on the cheek? | understanding each other without words or finishing each other’s sentences? | gazing into each other’s eyes or looking away blushing? | longing to be with someone again or spending every second together? | laughing together or crying together? | someone running their fingers through your hair or gently playing with your hand? | surprise kisses or long tight hugs?

tagging anyone who wants to participate :)

thanks for tagging me @eddiemunsn !! this is so cute i’m gonna vom

love at first sight or slowly growing fond of someone | love letters or mixtapes | hand kisses or kisses on the cheeks | understanding each other without words or finishing each other’s sentences | gazing into each other’s eyes or looking away blushing | longing to be with someone again or spending every second together | laughing together or crying together | someone running their fingers through your hair or gently playing with your hand | surprise kisses or long tight hugs

no pressure tags!! @madmaxmayfleld @peterthepark @mydreamsthieved @littledemondani @noretreatnancy

#eye contact w me means i love u

[barnabyjr]

if you’re ever about to comment on a writer’s work and think, oh, they probably know how good they are, you’re definitely wrong. every time a writer posts or publishes anything, no matter how many years they’ve been doing it and no matter how many readers they have, they are struck with the idea that perhaps they aren’t very good at all.

if you think you’re annoying for commenting, or that we won’t see your comments anyway, you’re wrong. we see your comments. we actively look for them. we are starved for them no matter how many we get. we remember them and they fuel us. leave comments, even if it’s just saying “oh i like this”. i see an “oh i like this” and my heart grows three times its size and i am seized with an urge to provide you more writing just to hear you say “oh i like this” again.

[barnabyjr]

with adhd/autism it's funny like. people will call you weird all your life, people will bully you for your "outlandish" behaviour, people will criticize literally everything you do as "not normal", BUT THE SECOND YOU GET DIAGNOSED (or suggest you might have it) they're like "huh what but you're so normal, you're literally the most normal person I've ever seen, you're literally so normal and absolutely nothing is wrong with you? why would you have that now all of a sudden???"

#BRUH #this exactly

[barnabyjr]

i'm worried what mine says about me lol (and my answers 👀)

tagging @amerrymystery @rae-and-mezo @kc-needs-coffee

thought of a new reblog game lol. i think handwriting says a lot about a person and i kinda just wanna know some general stuff about my mutuals, so write down your favorites of these things, take a picture, post it, and tag your moots!!

tags: @spidervee @iheardarumorthings @scandalous-chaos @actuallydarling @ddejavvu @evermoreal @abibliophobiaa @roxetteblack @sapphireplums @plumes-de-nuit @decadentpaperduck @run2yourgrl @jamespottersmommy @shyposttree

#its either swirly like this or straight caps y'all #why do i have high school mean girl / future nurse handwriting

[barnabyjr]

i love doing these! ty for the tag 💛

tagging anyone who wants to do this!!

@amerrymystery @herrunawaytriumph @im-eating-rn

What’s your academia aesthetic?

tagging (no pressure 💕):

@imgoingtofreakoutnow @faye-tale @friendlyneighbourhood-parker @devilish-mirage @leh2393 @syrma-sensei @loki-hargreeves @twwcs @kindnonny23 @scarabgrant @mintpurplemnm @palebrunettesstuff @kittiesluvyou

#i feel so dainty #i need to memorize all of your usernames

[barnabyjr]

OMGGGGGGG DUDE IM SO HAPPY FOR YOU

THANK YOU BESTIE 💛

saw my new classroom yesterday and set it up all cute and rainbow themed i'm so excited

#kisses

[barnabyjr]

i made a uquiz where i designate you “____ to lovers” pls validate me by reblogging & tagging with what u get

#allies to lovers #im literally listening to hunger games on libby rn #wheres my peeta 😤

[barnabyjr]

IM HAPPY FOR YOU!!!

THANK YOU

#i'm happy too #thanks anon i love you

[barnabyjr]

obligatory info dump on my life rn

it’s the end of summer so you know what that means: time for me to update y’all on my life and write it all down so i know what the fuck is going on lol. i have been BUSY but it’s all coming out millhouse 

-so i got a promotion and a raise! i’m officially a lead teacher now but that means more days, hours, and responsibilities so your girl is gonna be s t r e s s e d and trying to adjust to a new schedule and age group

-i’m on track to graduate in december, only have three classes left.it has been years (five including my year off to teach) and i am so ready to quietly get my degree and be able to say that i did it. i don’t want to have a graduation ceremony but my therapist thinks it’s important? 

-dating the himbo again but he’s actually done a lot of growing up? we’re developing something real now and exclusive?? i want things to work out but the universe and everyone in my life is telling me that they won’t and i’m trying to just enjoy our time together and not fall in love w him cause he’s let me down so many times. it’s nice getting to call a hot guy my bf but it doesn’t feel like he is lol

-but that means i am ready to be loved !! now that my life is on track and i’m getting my shit together and i’ve healed from all the abusive dudes i’ve dated, soon i’ll be ready to find someone different who will treat me right ! in the words of my grandma, i would like a big time romance (btr stans rise up) with someone who wants something serious. i’d love that w the himbo, but i don’t think he could give me what i deserve. so i decided in january i will stop giving attention to ppl who hurt me and i’ll start looking for someone to take care of my damaged lil heart cause lord knows i’m the only one who has

-going to get my license by the end of the year (been saying this forever, but i’m tired of getting carded and pulling out my permit oof). guys i’m actually gonna do it i swear

-i’m moving into my old room !! i will have a WINDOW, a DESK, and reliable AC. i am so damn happy. i’ve been in a makeshift room for five years and it absolutely destroyed my mental health but i’ve got a sibling moving out so i get a real room again. v stoked obviously

-went through a mental breakdown in the spring, finally feeling healed from it. sh issues flared up worse than ever but i haven’t done anything in months and have no desire to. i’m in a much better headspace and only getting better. very excited to be happy :)

-i want to be creative again !! i’ve been writing (shocker) even for hphm (bigger shocker) and working on making content. i won’t have as much free time this semester with work and school but i’ve found this blog to be a good stress relief from those stresses

-i love and appreciate all of you who follow me, thank you for liking my sporadic content and always encouraging me to make more <3 y’all are the ones that keep this alive

tldr: i’m thriving bitch !!

#diary entry #number 876543456 #seriously though i'm feeling good and being good

[barnabyjr]

Bastard (Good)

You're a bastard. A wet cat, if you will. And we love you for it. You're a little shit, but in the good way. You are the baddest babygirl. You killed a man, but you looked good doing it. You flirted with the hero and the enemy. All of Tumblr is madly in love with you. Congrats, I guess?

okay all my mutuals have to do this lmao

@dat-silvers-girl @meteora-fc @im-eating-rn​

NEW CHALLENGE

1. FIRST, create a picrew using this maker, and then 2. SECOND take this quiz on how fandom would see you if you were a fictional character.  3 (THIRD) POST YOUR PIC AND YOUR DESCRIPTION IN THE REBLOG!

Bastard (Good)

You’re a bastard. A wet cat, if you will. And we love you for it. You’re a little shit, but in the good way. You are the baddest babygirl. You killed a man, but you looked good doing it. You flirted with the hero and the enemy. All of Tumblr is madly in love with you. Congrats, I guess?

Tagging EVERYONE but especially @magicaltear, @the-beeses-kneeses, @wafflesrisa, @mykingdomforapen, @marbat, @scientistsinistral, @halberdierminister​!

#i was waiting to get roasted #was so confident i'd get needs a hug or neurodivergent coded lol #this description doesn't apply to me but i will wear it w PRIDE

[barnabyjr]

Hii! How u doing? How would the hphm gang be like when drunk?

absolute mess: bill, barnaby, PENNY, rowan, charlie, liz

surprisingly philosophical: jae, murphy, tulip, andre

unlocking their final form: merula, skye, TONKS

nightmare to deal with: BEN, ismelda, diego

pretty normal actually: orion, talbott, badeea

#hc on who is a lightweight or not?? lol #hogwats mystery #hogwarts mystery #harry potter #hphm #harry potter hogwarts mystery #hp hogwarts mystery #hp imagine #hphm imagine #hphm jacob #andre egwu #badeea ali #ben copper #bill weasley #barnaby lee #charlie weasley #chiara lobosca #chiara lobosco #diego caplan #ismelda murk #jae kim #liz tuttle #merula snyde #murphy mcnully #nymphadora tonks #orion amari #penny haywood #rowan khanna #skye parkin #talbott winger

[barnabyjr]

Pet names for the girls?

penny: honeybun

merula: babe

skye: sunshine

tonks: firecracker

ismelda: stinky pumpkin

rowan: love

chiara: darling

tulip: angel

badeea: princess

liz: dove

#the irony is palatable #hp hogwarts mystery #hogwarts mystery #harry potter #hphm #harry potter hogwarts mystery #harry potter hogwarts game #hogwats mystery #badeea ali #chiara lobosca #chiara lobosco #ismelda murk #liz tuttle #merula snyde #nymphadora tonks #penny haywood #rowan khanna #skye parkin #tulip kasaru

[barnabyjr]

Are u doin ok? i like your write about hphm!

i'm doing well, thank you for asking! i'm very tempted to start playing hphm again... lol

#i do wanna write more tho