artificialgrinder

[artificialgrinder]

Okay so I've had a think about it.

And YES I KNOW I DIDN'T UPDATE THIS WEEK BUT I WILL THIS WEEK, I PROMISE.

So I tried to think about the last time I went through this writers block, just the time I vented to my friend about it. She asked me, "Well what inspires you to write? Not like lighting candles and all that jazz. When specifically does the creative juices come flowing?" And I was like, "whenever I reread the story from beginning to the current point?" And she said, "well, get reading then."

So yeah I guess I'm going to reread the entire fic. Wish me luck

#drag or die au #drag or die #rpdr fanfiction #artificialgrinder #rpdr fanfic

[artificialgrinder]

I feel like I've lost my passions...

I remember 5 years ago being on a boat, travelling to University. It was night time, no one was around. My Da and sister were up in their cabin trying to sleep. But it was far too early for me to be sleeping. I mean, I was used to staying up late and writing. Because it was exciting. I didn't know when to stop. So there was me, on the boat, in the empty kids play area, hiding in a tunnel to write.

Such a core memory.

Every job I've had - save my current - I'd often write during breaks....and maybe sometimes when I was supposed to be working. I was committed. I needed the world to read the story I've worked so hard on.

Two years ago, Christmas 2022, I woke up at 6AM to write instead of laying on until 8AM and getting up to open presents. And even later after Christmas Dinner, while we were watching movies, I was writing.

I completed NaNoWriMo 2022. It made me excited for NaNoWriMo 2023....

But I didn't partake this time.

I set up my goals, made the projects...but never felt the motivation.

So yeah, I feel like I've lost motivation to write all together. And I don't know if its my executive dysfunction or just general laziness, but whatever it is, I hate it.

I want to see Drag or Die to the very end. Of all the fanfics I've ever written, this one is my baby. I have been working on this story for half a decade now, how can I not adore this stupid story I've created about my favourite Drag Queens?

But I'm just so afraid that I'll leave the procrastination to go on way too long, and by the time Drag or Die 10 is posted completely, I still wont be done Drag or Die 11. And then I'll just let readers down. I know there is not many of you but idc about numbers, it just means a lot already that I even have readers.

You know what though? I was in a job for 2 full years, only to end up getting gaslit daily, so I left. And that was the job I would write a lot in. Then I went to be a housekeeper, so no time at all to write. And by the time I got home, I'd be too exhausted to do any writing.

And now I'm that used to it I just don't feel motivated at all anymore.

So yeah, I blame that bastardin' hotel. lol

On a lighter note, I've started drawing again. So it seems the creative juices are slowly starting to brew again. Fingers crossed.

Also I want to point out this is nothing to do with views or traffic to the fic. When I mean I don't have motivation to write anymore, it's not just Drag or Die. There are 2 other stories too. And like I said, I already love the fact there are people who read it.

Anyway TLDR: I used to love writing but a hotel made me lost motivation.

Advice please?

#vent post #vent #writing vent #drag or die #drag or die au #writing

[artificialgrinder]

Drag or Die: Part Seven

Trixie is safe in the presence of Katya and the army. The two queens try to rekindle their relationship as the weeks pass, whilst Adore and Bianca are trying to figure out how to mend their own. As the queens plan to move on in their recruitment plan, the commander fights to keep the peace. But how can she trust Bianca again?

[ 1 ] // [ 2 ] // [ 3 ] // [ 4 ] // [ 5 ] // [ 6 ] // [ 7 ] // [ 8 ]

#drag or die #drag or die au #rpdr fanfiction #rpdr fanfic #artificialgrinder #artificialqueens #trixya #trixya fanfic #biadore #adore delano #katya zamolodchikova #trixie mattel

[artificialgrinder]

Another face reveal as my dude self. What's his name, yall? 🤔

#face reveal #drag #genderfluid #vampire

[artificialgrinder]

NEW VILLAINS NEW VILLAINS

Drag or Die: Villain cast!

https://64.media.tumblr.com/8842162498a57c7c7ab7db63b01e6e37/tumblr_inline_nw0rt6EVIN1r6xb6e_500.gifvWILL BE UPDATING AS THE STORY PROGRESSES! ‘Cause of course I need to cast my villains!

President Cinereal:

Elijah Ellis: 

Smoke:

Vince:

Jude:

Haynes:

Abaddon: 

Lilith:

#drag or die au #tom hiddleston #india eisley #rpdr fanfiction #trixya fanfic #trixya fic #trixya

[artificialgrinder]

AMA: Drag or Die

Send questions, anything Drag or Die related; ships, my opinions, writing process, changes in the multiple edits, the lore of the AU. I'm hoping maybe it'll fuel my motivation.

#drag or die au

[artificialgrinder]

For the average citizen, has anything changed? We know the aquarium is deserted and the us is divided into zones, with the dispatchers, but they can’t kill everyone or there is no civilization to rule.

Obviously, they deal with other crimes, eg robberies, kidnappings, etc. But later in book 6, it'll explore how it's not just queer people who are targetted but other minorities. I really appreciate these questions by the way!

[artificialgrinder]

For drag or die, what is the rest of the world like? Are families okay

Hiya! So in all honesty, I haven't got a solid answer. I mean, after the series is done, I plan on writing mini spin offs that explore side characters and maybe how things are in different countries that could give us insight to how this universe impacts other queens. Like a Drag or Die UK spin off? I think it could be pretty sick

Thanks for the question!

[artificialgrinder]

This me embracing my man side. And tbh this is what I'd wear if I was a character in the Drag or Die universe

I only wanna be known as Genderfluid vampire pirate guy from now on

#genderfluid #gay #queer #lgbtqia #am i a man yet dad??

[artificialgrinder]

Hi! I just wanted to say thank you for continuing to write! I’ve been reading your works for a while now and I’m always looking forward to the new chapters of Drag or Die. You’re an incredible writer and you’re the only one who has been filling the Biadore sized hole in my heart lately. Thank you for everything!! ❤️

Thank you so much! Just remember, I have so much of this fic written that y'all ain't seen yet! I'm never giving this up. Especially with the love I have from my readers. All of this love means everything to me <3

[artificialgrinder]

Drag or Die: Part Six

Trixie is alive but just about holding on. Only the company of Katya can keep her fighting for her life. But far from Trixie's location, Katya is with the prison queens, preparing to take the next step in their mission -- venturing out into the big bad world.

Chapters:

[ 1 ] // [ 2 ] // [ 3 ] // [ 4 ] // [ 5 ] // [ 6 ] // [ 7 ] // [ 8 ] // [ 9 ]

#drag or die #drag or die au #rpdr fanfiction #rpdr fanfic #artificialgrinder #artificialqueens #trixya #trixya fanfic #trixya fic #biadore #biadore fanfic #adore delano #katya zamolodchikova

[artificialgrinder]

See you next Thursday ;)

#drag or die au #drag or die #drag or die VI

[artificialgrinder]

THE DARK SEEPING IN (BRATZ FASHION PIXIEZ REIMAGINING) CH. 9

Dylan receives the strangest, yet darkest phone call of his life.

AN:

I'm so sorry I haven't updated in a while. I actually started a new job but I have to admit, I've also found It extremely difficult to find motivation as of late. But I'm trying to force myself to continue on. So I hope this wee update is enough to keep you all going until I next update.

TW's for this chapter: underage drinking // violence mentions // drugging mentions

“What…the fuck?”

Breeana just…stood stunned. Fuck, she knew shit was bad when she caught the now-winged Cymbeline the first time. 

But now, it was even worse.

“I-I can explain,” Breeana stammered.

Yasmin still stared at the sky, watching the glowing dot that was Cymbeline become less and less visible. Cloe on the other hand, rubbed her elbows and edged towards the forest.

“So - So, like, she’s a pixie.” Yasmin stated, despite it sounding more like a question. Her eyes were wide and her skin pale, unable to determine if this was some weird fever dream.

Breeana shook her head feverishly. “We don’t say pixie. But that’s - -” 

“Oh, sorry. I meant ‘fairy’,” Yasmin continued sarcastically.

“Well…fairy is also a term we don’t use.”

“Jesus Christ.”

“We say fae or…”

“Breeana! It doesn’t fucking matter! Cymbeline literally just flew off right in front of our fucking eyes! I mean…what…? How…?”

Again, the youngest Devlin struggled to find the right response. But what could she possibly say to make all this go away.

“We gotta go!” Cloe shook her head, her anxiety just as high in the sky as Cymbeline. “W-We gotta get back to Sasha and Jade and - -”

“You can’t tell them!” Breeana blurted.

“Breeana! How?! How can we not?!” Yasmin held her arms out by her side. “Cymbeline is our friend! She - -”

“Then, if that’s true, and you really care about her, then you won’t tell anyone! I’m serious, Yasmin. This is…This is more complicated than it looks.” Breeana’s voice cracked, already shivering from the growing panic and the breeze from the cliff top.

“More complicated than it looks?! Bitch, are you kidding?!” Cloe yelled.

“God, now I wish she was just acting too cool for us!” Yasmin added.

Stuttering and fighting to find her words, Breeana slowly realised not a damn thing would keep these girls from staying silent. And the only thing she could bring herself to do…

Well she’d have to have a long and heated talk with her Dad.

She raised both hands, pointed at both Yasmin and Cloe. “‘So will those mere mortals be silenced, and unable to speak…’” She spoke quietly, reciting the spell she had learned so young. Outside of practising under her father’s gaze, things never came down to this. She was breaking his trust, but for his own good. And it hurt. 

Despite the few drinks both teens had before coming to the Devlin’s home, Yasmin and Cloe were too quick for Breeana.

“Oh, shit, let’s go!” Cloe snatched Yasmin’s hand, and both teens dashed into the sea of trees.

So many voices in Breeana’s mind told her to run…Take off after the frightened girls. 

But her feet remained planted. There was no hope in stopping them.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Her knees gave in, bringing Breena down to the ground, her head empty of ways to fix this shit.

For what felt like the tenth time, Dylan messaged Sasha.

‘Yo where you at girl?’

Standing off to the sidelines of the club whilst everyone else lost their shit to the music, Dylan stared at his phone screen, begging whoever was listening to his inner thoughts to allow him a response. Yes, it seemed obsessive and extremely annoying, but with Cymbeline not here either, it was possible shit went down.

As concerned as he was, he was a drama thirst. He needed to know the T'.

Forty-five minutes had passed since Sasha let him know they were swinging around the Devlin’s house first, nothing out of the ordinary considering the two sisters were a bit out of town. But with no response, something had to have happened.

Sighing, Dylan looked away from the screen, impatience getting the better of him. And along came Cameron, and he was very very trashed.

“Yo, so I’ve been thinking, Dyl’.” Cameron slung an arm around his friend’s shoulder, the drink in his hand sloshing over the side of the cup and onto Dylan’s shoes. “About what you said.”

“What I said?” Dylan mourned the white colour of his shoes.

“Yeah. About Cloe.”

“Uh huh?”

“I just…you know…I gotta just - -” Cameron hiccuped, “be myself, you know? I mean, we made out at Nevra’s party that one time. I’m already a foot in. You feel, homey?”

“I feel, homey.”

Before Cameron could continue his ramblings, the music came to an end, only the sound of the crowd remaining. Koby was at the front of the stage, sweating dripping from his beaded forehead. He panted, peeling the black t-shirt from his form and tossing it into the screaming crowd of fans.

“Gross.” Cameron commented.

“You guys are awesome,” Koby said into the mic before pointing at Cade, the boy knocking back shots at the bar. “Cade? Happy Birthday, my dude. My brother from another mother for life.”

Not wanting to break his streak, Cade took another shot and raised a thumbs up, signalling his approval.

“Love you, dude.” Koby breathed into the mic before addressing the audience again. “Alright, so…I need a break. I need some water for real, guys. But this ain’t the end of the music.”

The crowd went wild again, as if they knew what was about to happen.

“So I’m gonna have a friend of mine take over for a bit.” And Koby looked over his shoulder, already seeing said friend make her way on stage. “Dudes…Dudettes…All you peeps in between…here's Roxxi Sin.”

Both Dylan and Cameron joined in on the cheering as Roxxi stepped up to the mic, adjusting her guitar. The girl let her eyes trail the audience, just for a moment, before they landed on one girl in particular – her girlfriend.

“Hi, Nevra,” Roxxi smiled into the mic.

“Hi, baby!” Nevra waved her hand around, excitement coursing through her. She looked at those around her. “That’s my girlfriend! She’s my fucking girlfriend, and I love her!”

“You’ll love this one, babe.” And Roxxi strummed her guitar, bringing the rest of Koby’s band to join in.

“Man,” Cameron started, “Love is like…love is the tits. You know?”

“Yeah. Yeah, I know.” Dylan laughed now.

“But what would you know, my guy?” Cameron continued, taking a large swig of his drink. “You used to be, like, in every girl’s DM’s. Nowadays I never see you with any.”

“Cam’, my entire friend group consists of girls,” Dylan squinted his eyes.

“Yeah, but you ain’t dating any of them.”

“Well, maybe I don’t wanna date them.” Dylan went back to watching Roxxi serenade her girlfriend, telling Cameron the conversation was over. But now lost in thought, he knew his friend was right. Once upon a time, Dylan was the biggest player in school. But times had changed. His friendship with the five girls enlightened and educated his juvenile mind, and even though he still had a long way to go, he rarely ever felt the need to comment on the appearance of attractive girls. 

Of course, there was that time Lina was introduced in chemistry class, but that soon fizzled – just a quick fascination that passed.

As for now, there was one girl on his mind. And yet, he wasn’t so sure if it was even possible.

Pulling his phone out again, he hoped for a message from her only for those hopes to diminish. Sasha had yet to reply as well. Crazy.

But there was one message – an unknown number.

‘We need to talk, big boy. Call or she’ll be hurt.’

Immediately, his heart was struck by a sting. Staring at his phone screen, his stomach as seconds passed. Who the fuck was this? Who would be hurt? To call the police or just call the person right then and there?

“Hang on, Cameron,” Dylan quickly pat his drunk friend on the shoulder as he rushed towards the exit.

The music became quieter and quieter the closer he got to the door. And once outside, it was just a thumping beat. 

Dylan’s hands shook as he called the number, wishing so much that it would just keep ringing. He was a nervous wreck, but the thought of something happening to someone because of his carelessness...

The ringing ended, and yet, nothing was heard on the other end.

“Hello?” Dylan said quietly.

Another moment of silence ensued before, finally, someone spoke in a low and dangerous tone. “What’s up, Dylan?”

Just like that, his nerves diminished. “Zach. What the fuck do you want?”

“Straight to the point, my guy. Nice,” Zach continued, chuckling to himself like he was getting off. “Now look, you and me are due a fight.”

“Since when?”

“Depends how you look at it. Maybe it was the recent spat we had in the hall. Or maybe the long years of competition.”

“Competi - - Man, what the hell are you talking about? Are you high?”

“Shut the fuck up, Dylan. Now listen to me; get your ass out to my location right fucking now so I can kick your ass to ground. Got it?”

Dylan could have laughed. “You really think you can beat me down? You think you scare me? ‘Cause all I hear right now are pathetic bitch ass words and an asshole breathing heavy on the phone like he’s touching himself.”

Zach completely ignored the comment however. “I’m not alone, Dylan. Did you even read my message?”

And now did Dylan’s anxiety return. “H-How do I know that’s not just some pathetic way to get me to come to you?”

“You don’t believe me?” Zach chuckled darkly again. “Well then, I guess I gotta prove it to you then. Here, baby.”

Dylan squinted. Baby? Was he even talking to him anymore?

Another moment of silence…

Before a sweet voice came through...

Her voice...

“Dylan?”

The boy’s eyes widened. “B-Breeana?”

“Dylan, c-can you…” she paused, sounding weak, “Can you come get me? I…I don’t know where I am.”

“Breeana!” Dylan began to pace. “Breeana, ha-has he hurt you? What did he do?!”

“I can’t…I can’t move. I’m sinking…I can’t…” Breeana trailed off as Zach clearly pulled the phone back to his mouth.

“Believe me now, tough guy?” Zach glowered. 

“What did you do to her? I’ll fucking kill you if you’ve hurt her!”

“Relax, man. All I did was…probably slip something in her drink. But don’t worry. I haven’t laid a finger on her, Dylan. Well...not yet, at least. Just depends how fast you can get here. Have I made myself clear?”

Dylan was panting now, his blood boiling. Just the thought of anyone hurting that girl made him see red. “Drop the fucking pin, man. I swear to God, you’ll never live to see the day.”

“We’ll see about that. Bye, Dylan’.”

Not one moment was wasted. Dylan flagged the closest cab he could get. No matter where it was, or how much it would cost, he was going to get to that absolute waste of human life, and he was going to smash his skull with a rock.

#bratz fashion pixiez #bratz #bratz fanfic #bratz fanfiction #bratz breeana #bratz cymbeline #bratz lina

[artificialgrinder]

Rugirl song review tag #2

Been a few days. But leggo.

Song no 1: Sissy That Walk - Rugirl

Okay, but like, I think we can all agree this is a classic. Like, when this came out, it slapped. Love the song. Hate her.

Song no 2: Es Una Pasiva - Willam

A bop. But like, how did she come up with this? Like what made her think of making the song in Spanish? I mean like, I'm not complaining, I used to be so in love with this song and like even these days I still have a wee listen. Makes me wanna cause a scene

Song no 3: Gay Hands Up - Jan, Alaska Thunderfuck, Peppermint

Haven't really sat down to listen to this one but like, it kinda reminds me of one of the songs you could make on Sims 2 for the DS. Please tell me I'm not the only one who played that game. It was strange and those aliens still give me PTSD. But, yeah, catchy tune. Good job, Jan!

Song no 4: Rolling Stoner - Adore Delano

Guess yall could tell Adore is my fave queer singer :'D I remember first hearing this when she did this one music show where she was walking around an empty bar singing it. Like she sang this and Practical Magical, and I just remember being like omg yes bitch. Like this makes me wanna join a cult. This makes me wanna never wash my hair again. This makes me wanna model my life after Stevie Nicks. You feel?

#rugirl song tag

[artificialgrinder]

Rugirl song review tag #2

Part 2, waddup?

Song no 1: Zubi Zubi Zubi - Raja Gemini

Now this...guys. This is art. Seriously, like, this has the potential to be one of those sexy ass, deliciously amazing villain songs. And if you haven't listened to it yet then die correct that. Raja ate with this shit and didn't have to like fuck. She died for our sins.

Song no 2: I Can't Love You - Adore Delano

I love this one; very sad and melancholic. Vocals are amazing, I mean, it's fucking Adore. She's the best vocalist to come from drag race in my opinion. But it kinda reminds me of AS2 and that makes me sad.

Song no 3: Ugly - Courtney Act

The first time I heard this, my wee Irish heart broke for poor Courtney. Remember she went through that phase where she was hooking up with race chasers but they couldn't get into it and she thought it was because she wasn't enough? Nah! Courtney is enough. She is wholesome and sweet and important. She deserves to feel beautiful and I'm proud of where she is now. Sorry, back to the song. Sad but a bop. Just feels like a spring time song to listen to when its lightly raining outside. And as usual her voice is beautiful.

Song no 4: Battle Axe - Sharon Needles

Okay so I've only listened to this like once. And now that I'm listening again, I gotta say; thanks, I hate it. Like, not just 'cause Sharon's a shitty person, but the song in general is just a bit shite tbh. Like... "I'm a boss...apple sauce..." Clearly couldn't find anything to rhyme. Like why not "double cross" or something?? Like, wow, sis. And even the exaggerated American accent. I've always had a thing with people singing this way, like it feels lazy like they knew they couldn't really sing. Idk, just a woeful song. (But I do remember Phi Phi in the music video and that was fun to see).

#rugirl song tag

[artificialgrinder]

Rugirl song review tag #1

I'm giving in. I'm doing it. 4 songs per day or week or whatever I'm dedicated to.

Disclaimer: these opinions are solely my own, and they are only for songs that I've sat down and listened to in the past. And, remember, this is all just for fun. ^_^

Incase anyone else wants to do this, here you go: @veronicasanders @artificiallita @artificialcandycane @imstillafuckinglibra @artificialortega @glittertrail @optimisticfruitcup @thecollectionsof @puppywritesthings

Song no 1: wow - Alaska Thunderfuck

Remember this song? Like just getting on the school bus all the way back in 2004, and someone was playing this out loud on their phone while you sat alone and thought about how Gary (or Gaz depending how cool you were with him) threw a pen at the maths teacher earlier. And like, the only thing that would make this day any better was if you could get whoever was playing this song to Bluetooth it to yours? But they wouldn't 'cause you were the loser kid. Thankfully, your Ma and Da got you the CD for Christmas so you go home and play it on repeat. Nothing beats 2000's pop punk and Alaska honestly slayed.

Song no 2: Girl Next Door - Trixie Mattel

It's catchy like. Aye. I went through a huge Trixie Mattel phase even to the point of making a musical, and despite the music being bubblegum pop, it was depressing. But I digress. This was one of the songs on the musical, and now I can't listen to it without thinking about this fucking musical I made. And not to mention I played it over and over. Played out for me. I skip it when it comes on my shuffle.

Song no 3: My Address is Hollywood - Adore Delano

My days, this takes me back to University days. As much as I prefer Adore's new material and her grunge vibe, I have to admit, I love her R&B pop era. We love you queen! <3

Song no 4: Now or Never - Blair St. Clair

THIS SONG DESERVED TO BE PLAYED ON RADIO STATIONS. YOU CAN'T LISTEN TO THIS AND NOT TELL ME IT DOESN'T SOUND LIKE AVICII MADE THIS SONG. SO MANY GOOD MEMORIES, PREDRINKING WITH MY BESTIE BEFORE GOING OUT AND SINGING THIS AT THE TOP OF OUR LUNGS I FUCKING LOVE IT IUHFIAHGIOHFBOHISD;OIGH

This me dancing to Now or Never fr

#rugirl song tag

[artificialgrinder]

Tempted to start a post tag in which I put drag queen music on shuffle and review a couple once a day or week or whatever

#my thots