young752

[young752]

This is what my friend does with his time😂

[young752]

Big Mood

what is the january mood?

[young752]

Thats Beautiful😂

[young752]

Good lord

[young752]

Me and my brother

[young752]

HAPPY NEW YEAR to all the single people out in the world.\●-●/

[young752]

2018 Jacksepticeye recap

JANUARY

Jacksepticeye January Charity Livestream for American Foundation for Suicide Prevention starting from the goal of $50k and not even after an hour, we hit it! Second goal is $100k and over 2 hours, we hit again! The last goal is $200k and in 7 and a half hours, WE. HIT. IT!!! AMAZING!!!

FEBRUARY

Sean hit 18 Million Subscribers!

He got to train to be a stunt man for Black Panther

Jacksepticeye February Charity Livestream for Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance (DBSA) and raised $80k in less than 5 and a half hours then in 5 mins, raised another $10k and put us into $90k and as Jack promised, he donated $10k and pushed us over to $100k!!! ABSOLUTELY INSANE!!!

He was invited to be on The Late Late Show!

MARCH

He started his first leg of the HDWGH tour in America 

APRIL

He announced his second leg (Canada) and third leg (West Coast) of his HDWGH tour

Jacksepticeye April Charity Livestream for GameChanger and raised $100k in 5 hours!! and pushed it over to $150k in another 5 hours and that’s 10 hours in total! YOU GUYS ARE FANTASTIC!!!

MAY

This is where The Egopocalypse™ started

He met and played Deadpool with Ryan Reynolds!

Sean hit 19 million subscribers!

Jacksepticeye’s May Charity Livestream for Charity: Water and raised a $100k in less than 8 hours!!! SO MANY GENEROUS PEOPLE!!

JUNE

He was invited to do the HDWGH live show comedy world tour in Just For Laughs!

Jacksepticeye’s June Charity Livestream for AbleGamers and raised the first goal of $100k in over 5 hours and in over 9 hours we reached another goal of $150k!!! SUCH A WONDERFUL COMMUNITY!!!

JULY

Took his first ACTUAL break!

Was in Youtubers React

AUGUST

He released his PMA merch!

Collabed with Bryan Dechart and Amelia Rose Blaire!

Talked to a licensed therapist about mental health

Jacksepticeye’s August Charity Livestream for St. Jude’s and reached $100k in 3 hours! RIDICULOUSLY WONDERFUL!!!

Was in H3H3′s podcast

Was in Game Grumps’ Ten Minute Power Hour

SEPTEMBER

Did a Power Hour with Arin

Was in the Good Mythical Morning

OCTOBER

Released Mark and his clothing brand, Cloak!

NOVEMBER

Official Launching of Cloak!

Did a Pole Dancing video with Mark

DECEMBER

Jacksepticeye’s December Charity Livestream for Crisis Text Line and reached over $200k in 7 and a half hours! FUCKING FANTASTIC!

Interviewed Jason Momoa

and made 2018 his year!

[young752]

Love it

Welcome to Tumblr.

[young752]

This is Great😂 watch it

[young752]

I love This Story😂

So, last week, something pretty tragic happened in our household. It's taken me until now to wrap my head around it and find the words to describe the horror. It started off simple enough - something that's probably happened to most of you.

Sometime between midnight and 1:30am, our puppy Evie pooped on our rug in the living room. This is the only time she's done this, so it's probably just because we forgot to let her out before we went to bed that night. Now, if you have a detective's mind, you may be wondering how we know the poop occurred between midnight and 1:30am. We were asleep, so how do I know that time frame?

Why, friends, that's because our Roomba runs at 1:30am every night, while we sleep. And it found the poop. And so begins the Pooptastrophe. The poohpocalypse. The pooppening.

If you have a Roomba, please rid yourself of all distractions and absorb everything I'm about to tell you.

Do not, under any circumstances, let your Roomba run over dog poop. If the unthinkable does happen, and your Roomba runs over dog poop, stop it immediately and do not let it continue the cleaning cycle. Because if that happens, it will spread the dog poop over every conceivable surface within its reach, resulting in a home that closely resembles a Jackson Pollock poop painting.

It will be on your floorboards. It will be on your furniture legs. It will be on your carpets. It will be on your rugs. It will be on your kids' toy boxes. If it's near the floor, it will have poop on it. Those awesome wheels, which have a checkered surface for better traction, left 25-foot poop trails all over the house. Our lovable Roomba, who gets a careful cleaning every night, looked like it had been mudding. Yes, mudding - like what you do with a Jeep on a pipeline road. But in poop.

Then, when your four-year-old gets up at 3am to crawl into your bed, you'll wonder why he smells like dog poop. And you'll walk into the living room. And you'll wonder why the floor feels slightly gritty. And you'll see a brown-encrusted, vaguely Roomba-shaped thing sitting in the middle of the floor with a glowing green light, like everything's okay. Like it's proud of itself. You were still half-asleep until this point, but now you wake up pretty damn quickly.

And then the horror. Oh the horror.

So, first you clean the child. You scrub the poop off his feet and put him back in bed. But you don't bother cleaning your own feet, because you know what's coming. It's inevitable, and it's coming at you like a freight train. Some folks would shrug their shoulders and get back in bed to deal with it in the morning. But you're not one of those people - you can't go to sleep with that war zone of poop in the living room.

So you clean the Roomba. You toss it in the bathtub to let it soak. You pull it apart, piece-by-piece, wondering at what point you became an adult and assumed responsibility for 3:30am-Roomba-disassembly-poop-cleanups. By this point, the poop isn't just on your hands - it's smeared up to your elbows. You already heard the Roomba make that "whirlllllllllllllllll-boop-hisssssssss" noise that sounds like electronics dying, and you realize you forgot to pull the battery before getting it wet. More on that later.

Oh, and you're not just using profanity - you're inventing new types of profanity. You're saying things that would make Satan shudder in revulsion. You hope your kid stayed in bed, because if he hears you talking like this, there's no way he's not ending up in prison.

Then you get out the carpet shampooer. When you push it up to the rug - the rug that started it all - the shampooer just laughs at you. Because that rug is going in the trash, folks. But you shampoo it anyway, because your wife loved that damn rug, and you know she'll ask if you tried to clean it first.

Then you get out the paper towel rolls, idly wondering if you should invest in paper towel stock, and you blow through three or four rolls wiping up poop. Then you get the spray bottle with bleach water and hose down the floor boards to let them soak, because the poop has already dried. Then out comes the steam mop, and you take care of those 25-ft poop trails.

And then, because it's 6am, you go to bed. Let's finish this tomorrow, right?

The next day, you finish taking the Roomba apart, scraping out all the tiny flecks of poop, and after watching a few Youtube instructional videos, you remove the motherboard to wash it with a toothbrush. Then you bake it in the oven to dry. You put it all back together, and of course it doesn't work. Because you heard the "whirlllllllllllllll-boop-hissssssss" noise when it died its poopy death in the bathtub. But you hoped that maybe the Roomba gods would have mercy on you.

But there's a light at the end of the tunnel. After spending a week researching how to fix this damn $400 Roomba without spending $400 again - including refurb units, new motherboards, and new batteries - you finally decide to call the place where you bought it. That place called Hammacher Schlemmer. They have a funny name, but they have an awesome warranty. They claim it's for life, and it's for any reason.

So I called them and told the truth. My Roomba found dog poop and almost precipitated World War III.

And you know what they did? They offered to replace it. Yes, folks. They are replacing the Roomba that ran over dog poop and then died a poopy, watery death in the bathtub - by no fault of their own, of course.

So, mad props to Hammacher Schlemmer. If you're buying anything expensive, and they sell it, I recommend buying it from them. And remember - don't let your Roomba run over dog poop.

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Edit 1:

I wrote a book! It's called The Becoming, and it's a contemporary fantasy. Give it a try:

Amazon - https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0716C4HFR

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/thebecomingbook/

The Amazon link is for U.S. readers - international readers should go to their own country's Amazon site, then search for the book.

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Edit 2:

If you want more of this stuff, I have a Facebook page now:

https://www.facebook.com/pooptastrophist/

[young752]

[young752]

why >o<

everyone who reblogs this will get gordon ramsay in their inbox 

[young752]

Missing the point?

[young752]

[young752]

And God Said:

[young752]

Pft, screw being a strong ghost. I want to play with some cats as a ghost.

reblog to add +10 haunting power to your ghost when you die

[young752]

Lol, this whole song describes me :|  *Watch the music video*