yess5799

[yess5799]

[yess5799]

Class discussions are fun until u find out ur classmates are racists

[yess5799]

[yess5799]

mini spring giveaway :)

i haven’t done one of these in a while but i know a lot of people love lush and can’t always afford it so i thought i would give away a few of their items!

the winner will receive everything shown in the picture - charity pot lotion, whoosh shower gel, knot wrap shown in pic, sex bath bomb, butter ball bath bomb, baby bot bath bomb, chou chou toothy tabs, popcorn lip scrub, FUN, comforter shower gel, and their choice of face wash (doesn’t have to be angels on bare skin, thats just the one pictured)

to enter just reblog this post! likes don’t count, and it’s one entry per person (reblogging a bunch and spamming your followers won’t help you)

the winner will be chosen randomly on april 19th at 8 pm central time, and they will be privately messaged and have 24 hours to respond. if you have any other questions feel free to ask! 

also this is international, and dont delete this caption!! it won’t show up on your blog

[yess5799]

I work at a small pet store, and we sell two things in abundance: dog food and crickets. As for crickets, we sell them at twenty for $1. Now, the store is almost always busy, so we don’t have time to actually count out twenty crickets. We usually eyeball it, keeping our guesstimations on the generous side. Customers dig it because they usually get a few more crickets than they asked for, and we get to save time and generate a little good will.

One day a customer comes in and asks for one hundred large crickets. Let’s call him Clyde. No problem, I tell him. As I’m gathering the crickets into the bag, I ask him about what he’s feeding them to, and we get to talking about lizards, tarantulas, and other cricket-eaters. Clyde seems alright at this point - I genuinely enjoy talking about animals with the customers.

I hand Clyde the bag of about one hundred crickets, and he takes a long look at it, turning it this way and that. He looks at me and skeptically asks if there’s really a hundred crickets there. “Looks like 70 or 80,” he says. Mind you, everyone at the store is very good at guesstimating how many crickets are in a bag; we all know what 20, 50, and 100 crickets look like, and in all the time I’ve worked there, I’ve never been questioned by a customer.

My immediate emotional response was somewhere between annoyance and wounded pride. So, I did the reasonable, logical thing: I took the bag back, and I told him I’d count every single cricket, ‘cause I’ll be damned if he doesn’t getexactly one hundred crickets.

So, I painstakingly count each cricket by dropping them one by one from the first bag into a new bag. He watches me the whole time, making comments here and there like “unnecessary” and “I’m sure it was a hundred.” But nay, I tell him. “I want to make absolutely sure that you get the crickets you paid for.”

As I count my hundredth cricket, I look at the remainder in the bag. Lo and behold, there are ten crickets leftover. A whole fifty cents! As I hand Clyde the new bag of exactly one hundred crickets and toss the rest back into the bin, I thank him for keeping me and the store honest, and assure him that I’ll count his crickets every time he comes in from now on.

Haven’t seen him since.

[yess5799]

[yess5799]

keeping up with the american elections while not being american like

[yess5799]

[yess5799]

cat people: a bit shy and soft-spoken. body is flexible. catches bugs

dog people: very excited all the time. wants to be your friend. probably eats ass

giraffe people: big fuckin jerks

[yess5799]

i feel like every single boy is a fuckboy. i feel like theres a fuckboy scale that goes from 1 to 10 that every single boy falls on. it’s not a question of whether a boy is a fuckboy or not but rather how bad of a fuckboy he is

[yess5799]

i’m so tired of the AU where your soulmate’s name is on your wrist. i want my enemy’s name on my wrist. i wanna know who i’m going to have to physically fight eventually. turn on your fucking location

[yess5799]

did you know?

for just $0.00 a day you can provide me with Attention

[yess5799]

the knowing eye contact women make when men are talking is the purest human connection possible

[yess5799]

I’m not the mom friend, I’m the dad friend: tries to take care of his friends but is too distant and emotionally clumsy to be any good at it

[yess5799]

When ur writing an essay for a test and the teacher says u have 3 minutes left 

[yess5799]

women's magazine

Page 14: You're beautiful the way you are

Page 15: How to quickly lose weight

Page 16: Cake Recipe

[yess5799]