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Katelyn my bud what about if I just come up there and sit in a chair in your driveway for the rest of me life while you wait on buses and see that you sew gravel into my knee socks which I shall never wear The sixth poem to be about love books Colin love hem when he coughed up nada of loght write a poem with my name in it behind the mall on Friday and the moors shall be here, too. Jumping Frog, Missouri Katelyn, do you want to read my bullshit that I wrote In Jumping Frog, Kentucky Love Thank you thank you Mischianza I see you in place of place and in heart opens love ...Mister Factual I love you always Says Mix Mix Bear God Piece of metal through my head doesn't hurt like a walkman or some kind of self taught aerospace engineer I think we have corresponded enough transparent father out beyond the father or rather I am the deepest love said me lord to me lord Utmost Empathy The first poem to be about the first, Colin, you're transparent as fuck aren't ya AND I see that I am love, man. I'm Charlie. I'm Charlie's Charles employee Ashley Sortie. She had a poem across her back and was never on her phone and the big moon was perfect always, thank you, thank you, you are large and lovely and guide the tides from place to place and from sorrow to sorrow, sortie, ashley sortie Short One for the Peeps at the Small Store Hiccup!/love! Hiccup! don't make me obsolete, Romeo at Bailey's, be home in an hour poet-poet playin board games for control of the board rooms cutely in duress and comin' and going and gone Rebuked into Grace The pupils change, stop, stop in eternity until eternity itself stops and you are yourself in the not self haven of heaven, galadriel's eyes, working, water time world Celestially Rebuked Til I got my humanness back, quality making everything sweet and lovely and fearless and full thereof. Love God, Colin, my young hero muffin, my dahlin clementine thanks you sweet fiery wasp for disappearing my porch is free Luck, grace, skill, and excess behind this heart, this risk, this Command. Meera, I see you following me at a distance with your face of happiness and your free face free of knowledge or knowing ink

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Various official falcons make runners look like things. One woman jumped through air, sailed. The second was like God screaming from the balcony. Tossing ribbons and handfuls of trash and a microphone she'd held earlier early in the year when the snow shoes were cold and used in the search for children who would not be found or counted among the prepared sounds, like the city's really lost among its dream of cars and parties you can get out of

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Praise for God Thank you beloved I see your blue hands gushing water all night a white place A shot of the top of your head is enough to take me out, sweetie, This is a short ballgame but we're on top, I believe, Thanks for the crazy time and the rejoinder, love, bee-yoo tiful Martian who I know, this is time is gone Kati B miss throw the puppy across the river and tuesday and cut offs n nails n alaska for ages an the bars of alaska just complaining you're numb and working round the clock all the time For Kati Hey What's up You chillin' Being all cool like the blues yeah yeah we've got the same voice yeah yeah wow wow cool One finds reasons to live, a little shaky but still, life is for the kids like me Look! It's Katelyn! I'm so happy so happy to be in love with her and I didn't even know it till now. when I feel better I better tell her, huh?

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New Life in Christ 'fascinated by what you notice said Sir to Her me loves more one-one and lil' one good child and conversion dance, the moon-following porridge of Love couple and the nice time life heart, ghosts and a hipster sex booster into black field faith and score your arms and braid of hair, pretty, your blouse I am handing over, pretty, pretty big white room, Huh?

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fiverreed In the room the walls were white and simple and the windows were open and a soft wind stuck the lace curtains to the sash stops. There was no television or screen of any kind, but there was a bible, facedown on the wheeled table, black and pink-worded and mute in the tensionless atmosphere. To the right, jutting into the door, one nautically-colored chair was empty. Everything seemed to somehow speak a little, saying you must really suffer now. He sat cross-legged and hunched with his knees gowned in the bedsheets. Through the window, gleaming persons quivered across the morning parking lot. Just off it was a small weird courtyard where Julien paced in agitation around a gazebo. She sighed shakily for a space of several seconds, stooped agaisnt the pearl paint, and inspected her wrists and the backs of her hands, trying to be present. She started sobbing and gazed up. Initially in her life all this would have made no sense. How was she supposed to handle all of it? She wanted to see her mom and her dad. A robin trotted through the heat, issuing now and then a note of hateless song. She lifted her chin from her forearm and gazed at it. When it fluttered, she blinked. It hopped out of sight. She let her eyes fall away. She walked through the corridors and stood in Fiver’s doorway, and went and sat at the edge of the bed to be with him. She backed up her elbows into the mattress and looked around. He said, I want to die. I don’t yet. Man! He hollered, and they watched one another’s faces. Aah! He pulled at his ducked brow confusedly and slapped the mattress. Man! An entering nurse said looking for you, and sat next to Julien. I told myself she’s not in her room, she’s probably down the hall. They didn’t admit me, so I don’t have a room. Well, that explains it. My arm? She meant, were they replacing the vein now? Yes, that’s what we’re doing. I don’t want aenesthetics. Okay. How long will it take? She stood up. I’ll be back, she told Fiver. We can do it right here, if you like. She sighed. Okay. She sat back down, looked down, and looked at the wall behind the nurse’s head. The nurse displayed the foldy white tube she was going to secure inside her arm. She pronounced its uses, her face sprinkled by windowlight and fan air. …So it won’t be black anymore, it will lose that charred bruise, hopefully, usually it goes that way. And you’ll be happy to know that the new ones don’t pop out. Is that humor? Julien held it between pinched fingers to her one open eye trying to look through it. You can’t sight along it, she told everybody. Well, its not a telescope. In front of her parents’ home, kids dropped from bay laurel boughs to the sidewalks. Ouch! Aaghh! Her wide mouth kept springing open under her clenched eyes. She kept flickering her head up sideways, trying to cling her mind to this moment, this moment, this moment. The nurse, who was named Jennifer Thomas, said, think of it like, this strange lady is giving me a haircut. When it was over she slumped in the chair dead-faced, curling her arm away so as not to undo the gauze. Fiver was asleep. He wasn’t. When does it ever end? Ever? I think it just did. I hope. No, don’t do that, at least not yet. She began to be in rivalry with the pain starting up in her mind. That night she was up and thought about walking home but she didn’t feel like it and was too sick, and anyway, the time was now. The press of darkness on her head was a delicate thing; if she moved too quickly, or at all, her mind was set spinning painfully, like she’d been made into the shore, and the tide was in. Too much of this inrush from the outside and she’d succomb, she’d be flipped apart and halved over and over until there was nothing left to make it back to. She prayed spirally Christian prayers frantically. She made it out to the nurses station. The night technician had a face that shattered into millions of tremulous flowers. This wouldn’t be on my chart, she said, because I don’t have one, but I’m withdrawing from benzodiazepines. Honey! You have to tell us these things! The nurse’s face was a golden argonaut’s now, with steel barnacles for the fastening in of cables by pliar. The light sprinted away from her face and into the splintering, draining air. I should have told you, she said. In her head she asked these words as a question. She thought the nurse said you can’t break the ties that bye yai yind. Oh my goodness! She called, rotating into the flourescent air. To lie on the floor was to damage the surface of the planet. She knew this, but she couldnt remember that she knew it, because her memory had broken. She could feel it trying to return, but even if it could, she wasn’t supposed to let it, because that was wrong. Next to her face someone’s scrubs made noise against their socks. The feel of her cheeks on the tile was excruciating. She flashed on a statue of a satyr in the feeding waters of a fountain. Think I’ll stop hanging out with Sean for a while, Jamie said to Alison in Blackwells one afternoon. His fake gruffness is getting on my nerves. Yup, said Alison. Its annoying. She glanced past Jamie’s face to see who was coming through the door. Brock, she said. Its Brock. You waiting for someone? Nah. Its just some feeling I’m having. Feeling. Why else would we be down here drankin’ but to rid ourselves of those? Drankin’… Alison admired the screen above the bar, blinking placidly, inquiring after the source of her current peaceful feelings. She sat her chin on the flipped rim of her wrist and watched Jamie with gentleness. I’m waiting on art to arrive, Jamie said, cause I feel it coming. Yeah…nobody around here cares… She couldnt ever predict what she herself would say or do, so that when the time came, she could explode in the face of things properly. A baptist walked by, got caught in her gaze, dodged out of it, frowned out of the wish to correct, and glanced on by, in some stream she didn’t care to understand. Jamie? Yes. Uhh… fuck believers. So sorry to hear that. I’m sure. Hey guy! Fuck your community! Jamie reeled her back by going at her sleeve like she was jiggering charcoal lines. Listen up: need ya to accompany me whilst I buy some drugs. Oh please. Please? Don’t fucking beg me. Well then I’m saying I’m telling you youre coming. What’s in it for me? Such piss, she said to her beer. Such a lot of piss. The company. I’m in your company right now. It would be a learning experience as well. You should grow up. Okay then, do it to spite local Christians. Uh close, but…scale it up. My friend, it wouod be a global action. ..and be like whose repurcussions are inevitably percussive. Thank you, she said with actual primness. Obliged. Oh, Jamie flicked her shot glass. That makes me so happy. She hugged Alison tightly around the shoulders. I don’t wanna let go. Jamie said, you drive cause you’ve had less. Where’m I taking us? First to the projects, then to the country. In this way we can avoid the rich places entirely. Not buying pills from my parents’ neighbors’ kids, sweet. I heard about cha, Jamie laughed. Taking your mom’s oxys and passing out. Yeah. I was in actual pain, though. She said: look at how I’m driving. This is the definition of creeping. Jamie laughed. Less creep, more roll! You gotta roll through like you have a destination, a purpose. Have you hung out with Fiver lately? Not of late cause he dissapears. Wonder how he is. My feeling is he and Julien are disappearing into one another’s arms and lives. Good for them. She freaks me out, but then again so’s Fiver. She’s cool. Yeah, but she doesn’t hang out. She’s busy. Cause she does shit. She’s too good to creep through and buy shit in duplicate, crack for her dad and lortabs for herself, even though she wants to find a way to the other side of this shit and be at rest as a big bad good person. Yeah, said Alison. Here we are. Jamie asked her to park and stepped out and bought pills in the blink of an eye. Don’t ask me to do this shit again. Alright, I won’t. It freaks me out. I didn’t want to be alone. Yeah, said Alison. Nobody does. You can be a jerk sometimes. Sorry, Jamie. Want to come over! Sure. Take pills and make stuff with paint. Jamie was dropping her hands in a water basin to get the high sandy flecks off her fingers. Its hard to think about staying in this town. To really consider it. She flicked drops in Alison’s face gently. Flincher. I guess the problem is I don’t know what it looks like. I can’t envision it. Staying. I dunno, said Alison. Like ten years? What’s that look like? Let’s go to the prairielands. Find the prairielands. Do those even still exist? I don’t know. Want me to google it and find out? …I’m discovering that yes, the grasslands do, in fact, to some extent, yeah, still exist, but we’d have to go to like Omaha, which is probably just a collection of toilet houses, so…fuck that… …but then I can’t see leaving yet, either. Likewise. Omaha seems like a giant hospital. Oh, its so sad, the feeling that there’s nothing at all in the world. There’s nothing, said Alison. I don’t know though. Yeah there probably is. How does one deal with it? You deal with it. Jamie trapped a print in clothespins and said, Too firm a perspective. You could stay. Open a bar. Make money, she sighed. Lack love. Although I don’t really feel that way. Wait, what are you talking about? Friend, I’m saying anyway you can die, I can die better. Huh? Alison! She laughed. Stop paying attention to me as if I’m saying anything truly important. You perplex me. Good. No, you worry me. I want to get a dalmation so I can strip the spots off thus I’d have mats for the patio. God. Pat ee yo. This one’s called gazebos for zebras, but its not about that, its about the permanent midnight of space. I don’t care for it. Its true meaning is I can side with sociopaths as well as anyone else. Think I’m gonna get out of here. Nooo! Its fine by me. We’ll hang out when you’re the slightest but sober. O K. At home out of tiredness she failed to say hi to her father, failed to feel close with her mother, went up the stairs. In her upstairs room with the window open the the breezy silence made the hour seem sad. There wasn’t hollowness though, and she felt lucky to not be Jamie, to not have all sorts of useless miseries echo past her heart like zipping birds, and laugh, and misunderstand. The wind stirred the alder boughs and brought them close enough to graze the sill. Ali! She didn’t hear the call until it came again: Ali come down! She groaned. No I refuse. She rolled her chair over to the sill. Shhh. You’ll wake the people. Oh man the people She lay her forehead against the dig-in of her palm. Its late and I’m lazy. Yeah, except time doesn’t really exist. Cept it does. A black dog came lapping along his heels. He recoiled but it still got tangled in his legs. She laughed good-naturedly. He fell down onto his palms and bounced back up to step around wobbily. Do you have any composure up there? Tons. Toss some down. Nope. I’m wide awake. Come on. Lets go play in the streets. You’re a doofus. Pretty please? Pretty please? Yeah definitely. I stand by it. She laughed. Tiredly she knocked her temple around along her wristline. Beneath blue dye her red hair was down and stray along the hairline. I don’t know. I’m really tired. Her phone dinged and lit softly. Text from Jamie. It said Every five or six months we select five or six of them and rip half their faces off. Man! She rubbed her eyes. What’s going on with Jamie? What do you mean? Acting crazy. Like how? Like crazy. Like saying shit that’s weird and not knowing she’s say ng it sometimes and then other times embracing the heck out of it. Is she on drugs? Uh yeah. I don’t know. Am I waking your parents? No, your voice is soft, but I may be. How’d you get over here if your car’s all wrecked? I walked. Then I’m walking – he flipped his arms into a railroad crossing configuration – right back the other way, so I’ll probably get to Julien’s when she’s ready to wake up. How’s that going? Really well, I think. We’re past those zags where we stop knowing one another. Those. She’s life-guarding this summer. Life-guarding?!? But she’s such a tiny one. You’re dumb. That just means she can save people by surprise. I’m not dumb. Good on her. I’m proud. Quit drinking! You did? I think. Making me proud now. It was still. She squinted at the crisp ring spaced broadly round the moon. In not too long a time cloudsbank would move across and the competing eerie pales would tease one another apart. Its a hushy kind of peace, she said. With the boughs grazing me. Anyway well, if you’re not coming down, I’m gonna walk off across town. See ya! See ya Ali! He tossed a few crumpled fingers in the air. That doesn’t make a wave, you spaz. Its also a fist, he said. So its a whole mix. He walked confidently until he started to slip into lifelessness. He sped up, recoiling from the look of streetlamps. Spiders scattered up the drive and under pails and the faces of gargoyles were unblemished forever. Not going over there. Aw. Come on. Nuh-uh. Alison, if you go over there with me– You’ll WHAT, and there was no answer. She woke from this dream exhausted, put on her dizzy shit, went and sat on the stoop and drank a bunch of coffee. A robin curlicued up the land. Okay clearly she had not been cut out for this shit where they head into project housing and come out with a gun, amd last night only served to prove that. James Orange’s dream–What had it been, what had it been–oh yeah where the guy with a round sun for a held held up two more suns at arms length. He’d been equidistant between Venus and some other thing, and the suns had been the pearls. The fog blew off the front of her brain. Her coffee cup was empty. She rose and stretched her arms and spotted where someone had left trash on the walks and pursed her face and frowned and blinked and blinked again and said oh well, went through the screen door to the lobby without being careful for its closing, her arms sapped of energy, her hips postureless, her steps inattentive to the smooth physical shape of the corridor. She got in her apartment and told her fish, so tired, you’re in your fish-tank and I’m TIRED. She sat in the chair with her arms on the armrests and lay back her head and dropped her mouth open ostentatiously. Some dude texted her at like ten in the morning. She called him back and said NO. Do not fucking TEXT ME. Hung up the phone and said Jesus!, startling the parrot. Whole lotta bullshit, mynah bird. She felt shame. She called Fiver. Stop communicating with my dreams. He was slow and groggy. What? He asked. Where were you wanting to go? What! What are you talking about! He rolled off the couch and peeked past the sill at the weather. What are you doing today? Ohhh….gon skate. Well shit. You should have just said so at the foremost. There’s nothing left to do but skate after the holocaust. She said, You’re dumb. He hung up the phone and hissed joyfully at the cats and went and perched in the window with a book. In the elementary school parking lot six of them bounded out from all four doors of the corrolla and skated around, preparing to rip creation asunder. Alison sat observantly on a stair, a crumpled cap tilted on her head. Jamie washed out of the alley and leaned on her board, watching the fray from in front of the sunlight. Alison cried, What’s up Jamie! Come over here! Lady hiya, I cannot! I must show them how its done. Ali winced at the grounded-out noise. Noon’s gay, Jamie! Its big and gay! A big, gay bird! And, I’m partly gay meself, so…no offense! I know! Thank you for reaffirming this knowledge! She bared her teeth at Fiver. Fiver, lemme take you in my jaw like a pup I’m gonna eat. We’ll whip one another around like crazy spaceships, even if it doesn’t work like that physically. What the FUCK are you talking about, careening Nathan inquired. Nathan, you’re such a complainer! cried Jamie. Nathan’s a short bitch! Ali hollered. But look at that hair! How it waves! Ali, you’re the goddamn golden child! I knew it! She bowed her face and threw her fists up. What the FUCK, Nathan said. STOP. JESUS. Just bein’ thankful, said jamie. We’re asleep until we love. In Blackwells Fiver said to Jamie, Jamie, will you help me work a spell on these river southerners? What sort of spell? I don’t know, I can’t think well enough to strategize. Ah yeah, that. Such a problem! Such a problem, Sean. Ahh? Its that you don’t listen to me when I speak. Fuck you sometimes. Fiver’s turned away. Let’s be ever so dextrous and steal a water vessel. Fiver, you can’t come if you hate us, but if you love us you may come. Y’all are the only ones of your kind I like, Sean said. I don’t understand. You’re on drugs. You’re drug people. And stupid, it occurs to me. Don’t you understand, Sean? We’re going to steal us a boat. Stupid without being stuoid. I knooow. I Know so very much, Dear Sean. You…keep people away…by assigning them names, to blank them out. He slouched his neck back and popped the top button of his collar open. Well, I’ll come, even if I don’t care or give a fuck. Fiver, save some of that cash, like don’t tip, so’s you can fling it fearfully at the homeless you’re too scared to save. Wanna ding dong ditch my drunk dad and in quick succession fuck all my friends AND enemies and I wish you’d turn your heart around before its too late. You know it sucks when the option has become, friend, I used to love being in your presence, like that was love and truth and home, but now I have to settle for seeing you in the afterlife. Leave behind the labor of performing fictional experiments on yourself, come, we’ll set up a hearth forever and you can rest your bones in my bones before we’re even old. I’m saying, wash my feet, caress the exhaustion from them, polish my old toes new by handing the bathed tiredness out of them, give it all up like innards to the held hands of the marvelous cosmos. I think I’m the rain. A seated cat glimmered blackly like an ancient jar. A pinch crazy, a mite ooooh, a bit alien, and quite drunk and high. Be happy for your job, pal. To the best of your ability be worshipful of Sophia in the lobby of the ol backwoods. To the northwest a ways, across the mississip, the people are normal, and sane, and ya could have gone there, but noo noo you gotta exhibit the disease of alcoholism as the second half of the opera of masking yourself to your own avoidance, shitperson. Light little aspirer. My beloved. I’m just saying, you shouldn’t have marched into the sea without me. Here have this fucking pen. To do this shit is somehow who you are so whether you like it or not, you’ve just got to. Channel me. I bridge France and England, or perhaps shall. Charlie, come home. Oh, he will one day, singing fucking angrily, calling out the world’s evil. Siphon, finish that shit up and let’s go take a tumble through the streets. And flame out? No, galoot. You mean flame out. You’d have to imprison me before I’d claim that. Alison said, my solidly alternative spirit means I haven’t withered in despair over y’all yet, and Fiver, Jamie meant excursion. Not even once? Not even one fucking time. That’s cool. A spirit of solid health. I’m transcribed like that. What, I really am. Dude, don’t have faith or look now but I really believe your life could re-bloom at any instant. They’re carving my name into trees all across the county, Ali. Country men. We’d best find the culprits. Sounds like a lame-ass quest. A baby skull, our names mysteriously carved into the heart of stuff like beribboned mustachios, to steal the means of transport after severing the ferryman’s hands, and at last mayhaps to need to murder some people although we desire it not. Yet what nobody can tell me is if that makes for a just evening and a well-spent youth. No, put your money away, we came here to play not pay. Shut up. Not doing ANY of that. Why the hell would one of us have a baby skull? What happened to the old plan of getting old and dying? Ah man its just a bunch of Christ and taxation. She looked around the bar. This is bullshit with fucking darkness in it. She felt the bartop. Structurally sound, though, for a gel of swirling particles. ACK. The deathly preparation. Take me out hard, Voldemort Radagast Marshall. Charlie Jewell’s fucking ghost-angel appeared, bent and attired in rags with holes up the back showing knots of spine, fully blonde, smiling, proudly embarrassed, waiting for someone to make him laugh or offer somethung awful to agree about. Jamie freaked out and chortled and danced her hands involuntarily in front of her until the world was dizzy; Alison made an O mouth as a joke and said What’s up Charles. Jamie was able to still her hands. She yelped. Alison said Quit yer burbling. Not Much. You’re all part of one thing, though. But yeah, just thought I’d drop by. Its certainly fucked up to see you. Yeah. Can you drink liquor? Fuck yeah, I’m a funnel into heaven. A funnel into heaven, dontcha know. He pointed a finger at Fiver. Its your fault I’m dead, but you can’t really tell if I mean that or if its in your own head. He cast his head back on his neck and laughed gahgahgah, his adam’s apple like a pedal. Ah yeah.

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These people on the tv screen are feasibly making real faces like people alive in life recovered revolving everywhere in a noncurrent all items brought to speed wheel great comet reseen clawing off it's face I used to think so too but I could take several of your compatible traits at random and make them equal or more harmful, and be right if a scroll was the first casual teethsome in an alley to make the mentionable dark comparison between the prince, herself, and the prince's food while time went backward you're how a human being dies taking the slant off a metaphor and the metaphor off it Always think life is fin in a small way chirp chirp An effaced noon Thats some fleet face you got there, very protective, lies alot, wants its secret derision to be true, permit me to make your change as you insist I keep the remainder, give it to donated people or orphans pleading for new sandals at once now now, permit me to chew your food for you, I bet it's real good food, sir, with your over ten dollars and upwards of a black hole in your forehead, at home in my uniform and my cheap brown wall enpurpling so much like the worst part of when Jerusalem was hidden I am crying for my children's dreams I was weird for awhile, the perfect male, nonchalance and contempt Alison as snatcher No human behaves like this. This is barely even a world. Like nondescript as the point. perspicacious twilight moon day I see you as sort of raised up as boundlessness at the end. What a nice young woman. Hi stainger. Where u been? Fuck you. (Pops out) Beautiful!

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I loved just running around having disaster befall me, pouring beers into the piano I was bound to as we fell ten stories, thinking if I could just wake up in the river i could swim to shore but then just kind of laying there futilely in the slosh with my neck attacking my jaw, I cant, i cannot live, nothing can ever happen to me, It's sad news for bees Imprisoned in a runny picture pretty monkey looking at some caustic gaggle of teacher's faces pissed off cause I recognize them Do not seek someone out until you are the truth The left found home and the right crushed justice and the center was not appeased by exception, its bitterness, or oh but of course, Ville of Light, you may befriend me once again in Apple June, do you want to come over and sit still in pretty emptiness deranged while I elbow around the crazy-looking waterfall lit roomlawn's hushed wall where shallow shadows play, and live, live with peace she asked and I cannot stand it, I cannot stand after all that preparatory care hell hath no bobbing, after all Shit! Ital Don't mathematizing the figuring out tham touch touch of the geography of paradox! just don't do, is all Gotta live gotta be happy! Shit! ital Shiiiit! ITAL the endless steel cry thas a gift and Whoa, plus, inhale nature, inhale the non sound walk of the pier's climbing emptiness with of course she's your wife, doff-headed pop, holding your hand when you still need

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Paxzez I am a small town in heaven, fraudulent response, anterior and I am the drain looking up into welcome the attempt, Trump mystifying ghosthood to look at the world like his father with slivers running in them greying eyes sa-staaaaay by hushing the mighty hand still curled in the dungeon or however ♡ ♡ ¡! One, I wanted to show up where you were, To hooligan the hail mary emptying out the worldly and vanish one thereupon One. Ifn that works, Find a Way -- If Colin / by way of Richard / is called a way Falsehood Health The abhorrent rhetoric for use in placating teachers at least was planetary and that is not to say correct when Merwin read our minds into a round table darked darked realing the leaves everytime I found out this means war subsiding into everything poignantly cutting out tongue and heart and certainly swirling them together in a cauldron full of his grandma's kids whatever happened to that guy Colin oh he he murdered he murdered he thought he...murdered turn out the light downstairs and lock the door Yes mom you "birthed" my masterful brotherman who I didn't rush back and save just kept the bottle up in disbelief in this blackout of too-huge clothes spilling off me where I'm a retarded monk ferret but at least I fuckinggoww -- hate Gatorade commercials long ago so my heart's still in some of the right places when it's still in a place and blips up oh a rewritten and contestedly legitimate existence in as long as jail lasts we all die therefore I'm going to threaten to fucking rape your children just to get out in front of I'm worried you think I might, of course it is true I am astonishingly sweet and nice though it is true i have heat coming off my pretty eyes clicking n burst face pulled into a sag, the truth's whatever the yowww you think it is I mean that truth, not that one truth I am not black but I grew up black although I was not born and do not live, in a support of shadow gang called cruck and fruit some of those more interesting things you paper lights you wholes I buzz for my unlucky bluster we should try and talk murk to light if your musk is still intact and insane-making but wait after we pass into life, is this is why I shattered my head and cut out decades and caused you to shun me and watched too young and crying people die like a lover, y'know? and they are not alive somewhere you know I cannot write you know Hermit Searches Out Constel Unen perspective on doin thas dishes torching my nerves with annoyance good damn Lord bring yourself into view child honey I've not rafted since I was dark but nonetheless this canoe is scrapped out wit sacks of water offensive and familyless and behaired like a bomb envelope dynamite's for sucker's learning why their fingers were cool sometimes if we want to wake up first we have to get blown up but I can't help you with your math I'm afraid My Progress For Your Sight The flowers have been melting, love, and you are coming home, talking in stages and saying things about me to me with your thought out earlier leaf allegories In my favorite voice dressed in limitations rich learning to shed coyness for a more fuller quest if your life will be eagerly gathered to pass on scruffless honesty for the carpet circle in 2300 and i know its your thankful patience despite those certain people who don't know more and the marshes upbuilt into ground not liking it when you have to see daffodils taken from the pool softly arguing arrivals and contesting spring's failure this time through Long Ago Saying hostile things in a friendly way, because that's what you do for monsters when you're not there to add up numbers for anybody, for anybody in total anguish, patch of sun field in a psych wars ward, crafts docking in the yellow projection novaing cooly In such enormity it barely exists silently throwing off silent, warming strings, which I see. my friend from outside New York who sleeps all day as though he cries about something, and I'm merry-making my mind fall apart romantically and taking care of Andrew, by morning approching a line falling up to a drawer in a wall behind which a part-time disc jockey and surrenderer, a commander of the hemispheres of song, hands me klonopin in a small dry paper cup and inlets, he tells me true stories about his life's work, college, and the mischief he accomplishes in a garage. I did that and later I went through having done that I saw this is what it feels like when hearing seems to go poorly grip you knock against your forehead from the inside with three red prongs like a godly satanic garbage clamp so there, why I stay inside Leonard Cohen making seductive threats for villagers with burning knives removing lamplit bales of hay they say you look angry and terrifying but I'm just evaded and murdered and just scared you're my real mom from the cymri seeds approaching me with wide arms clearly singing I've been watching and flinging and seeing over forever to make sure you're murdered correctly by your monster, frankenstein, my love. Your father's voice means "Die!" Porch Violet Heartless and you ain't nothing to worry about there is a dream, man, a dream that my take on died out in like how you see the plumes of evening from your forest, sittin there rockin your knees Hatitude Scam I've never even been here and now you're telling me I don't exist? Sometimes I see myself somewhere else, a station, curled on the floor in a black, suspended room as irreedemable torturers as large as collapsing logs understand how to provoke my innocence to nightmare exactly like here like me and joshes empty white insect eyes friends, country men, frequencies of nothing, can you hear Christ say Love Civil War Heart Repeated Don't bring me mallards, bring me things we could love to do together as I learn, original husband spectruming like some haha hilarious function after the marching band has collided together on purpose in protest of governance and the director sighed but was tired said you guys go I'll yell to you about it on Monday or something if I don't quit and drown like my grandfather's eyes yell across to you as you clean the tomatoes off the streets for thirty dollars apiece you sure do gotta give away like my grandfather's god if the ward's going to stay open and the conductor rescue the tied-together backs of your nikes and bikes, fear for brains God is Mad Colin was the declarative, poison mouth and paw looking at this driver saying How's this thing telling the truth Am I J'America Deliberately sliiiiiding into your voice just to PRAY for you to keep you wanting to kill me, Rotating Legs, Perfect Tie, Blasted hair, but no gait whatsoever Straws and Pens Right Now What'd this guy go through, Himself? the snake inside him. I sour and pucker my cricket face deforming the opposite feeling that sacredly observes a sort of lamplit lakeside throne in Japanese kingdom where we rendevous under cover of official function and customary royal sexual intrigue decree nightly to distract a number of the public annnd watchers ital and, barely having to whisper, begin to work out the savior's rebellion, start of ital a vehicle for the rest of them I say I write for my wife when we were just Prince and Princess meeting there, brought together paper lantern orders but rearranging into dimension by water choice to bucket out those trapped tots if there is a lapped moonlit stone gate raisable by aknowledging the twinkle justifying the moon and tjis is under the castle that the salamander-robed future shaking hands is arrived at above If you demand I should declare Advice If I have a false life to brag about, I can be shed as the real one emerges, Union, I'm repellantly avoiding learning about anything, sublingual and boring and disfigured but not symbolically disfigured, subliminally insisting I have everything, no straps face and cave Delorean Hades Scarlett, I miss Charlie! Then maybe you should have went back! colin, I am not a lifeguard! but this whistle I am pointing! means go back for him! re treeeeeeeive my eldest friend so that you aren't that now... Shakyamuni White Scarf, beres, downsel, here's your wedding dress your graduation your first car and your Christmas Christ, here's your love, friend, your love I'm starting to hate the enlightened They change too fast to see based on myself, Always making everything metaphorical for it, listening to it backwards is not the answer, but in a story it reverses sides, Marion, Let's go with Jared to the Shenandoah Valley this July, although May sounds better, get the ceiling outta here for a spell in this shorted out charm on replay Excl Philip K. Dick, I mention you to Sophie's barred wing 8000 to say no play unreality or tale or headdress to unchain ya and hostess into a cup of air Unrelated Whomsoev wrote Numbers was an ass hole N jerk '95 after the annoyed joke we enjoy home freshl in '94 um I gasp it's not so weird I would take on some of Emily above the chimneys in the smilies and the smokies who hand in proud danger in dying alone exclusively but on the topped last floor seated on the carpet dazed among circle tons of potted flowers unarranged, looking around Joking These old people glance at me like I am nothing and sit there reclining and gabbing saying so you hear in a droll way I got my whole life in front of me. Bastards, bastards lining a tree fountain yrgdasil teresa nothing let me go the arched pelicans of Spain's poignant war-evening happy to cry tears waltz they dance for me, once, say bluely and pacifically prepare: I am shocked to discover its all true and I am not terrific Puny betrayer note even descending now beneath where the moths bulben and dandelion as if I cant resist looking upwards at packing material slashed into salt continues the expellation of, the exfoliation of my quaintly hateful head Residents Liar, it's a trick again, backroads pretty headed toward manifold fraudulence, the scream of frogs How's it going Half of me is genetically dead and egotistically claiming as much, the other is bandage-throated, innocent, and severely lying about wanting help, to spill years into Jim's receiver and turn off so that everything that stands for it by accident is past it, midnight with some reality I've had to fight to tell the truth into, it appears Rejecting messengers, devising my own truth in terror, living in a story in a fireplace which devises a building, the exponential children of replete eras fooling us and not even caring in making their grandfather's voice pass through an hourglass first, oak willoe, us, who I am coming home to. as the sound slows and enlarges. handed up wings with difficulty the attic, the attic, it is lonely and silent stricken, who I am devoted to, I didn't look out for you. This is water but I can't ever swim Oh what's wrong Colin Aw Poor babe There was a flood on the road so I could not pass remember I don't want to be a craftsman, i am someone who hears surprised accidents Colin got slaughtered Colin got slaughtered Look at this lovely world R7 Cant believe its okay to notice or not be afraid of males heave you around through physical areas without even noticing you delighted strain of agreed on forward power cackling sweated laughter-pain about being enmeshed in tackling quaint liberty bell and so on, and so on, and go on to be glimmery eyed surgeful former addict doctors howling at the understood rules Maggie looking at me from an earmed chair explaining peonies opening as the loved one's face showing me by rounding her arms and clenching inches of air how she made a big hole in the yard cardinal and mate above gutter peeked on this is your visual as I am in jumpiness My buds are small they need ants to crawl on their faces their faces become so large New Haven go to New haven Two mazes And the river, I always like being near the river you may not like her but I like things other people don't like sometimes. If you go there you'll go back. I am sorry, it's called New Harmony. I forgot that, but the rest is right Get locked in narcissism by someone narcissistic so you find something to be delusional about in the hope of having a way out and accidentally pray you kill yourself. Your own or just the appearance of behaviors, does it matter yes it does up. Wear a veil as your old tricks continue in the dust. Coughing up moths in confession so as not to get clung to in the attic. Hearing hell, out to sea and sky If the light must seem in fact to flicker across your face in the wonderless room where we know nothing, you call your face drug jaguar distortion not very funny ever and wrestle me down, smashing up the flat puzzle showing picket shadows and ballooning shops and houses and the yes not ever or we'd have known, what if I'm the little pig Faulkner ran out of so he put the butcher knife up, what if "oh grief where is thy what if nowwww" not in the light-headed skull or revolving in lightness or fact after circled out fact I start to shake and my eyes do growl like something evil stirred not shaken in fine China Samuel, like the noises of noon on a bad day when you're depressed but at least you're not working in the mines any more or Derek Zoolander, the way I am, infuriated, (wink) suspendered (wink wink) in a trounce-shaft, dressed for another world Reeds I called you but it wasn't your number at any time and I was dead, I was dead, I blushed about it, I lost what to say next from honeycomb our OUR parents' stalks failed but not really because of how much we spent on un-placed lies in the kneed-in mud weeds searching again for yogi ramsuratkumar's dispatches of wave-material butterflies just begging to be swallowed essentially, Constant thought you thought I was lying, globe we are among the signs I think, I gush my heart's fortune growing up to be Charlie Too Late! I never knew so I lied I never know what anything was this town where I grow up okay in yellow trees probably slinging the limpen past into an apple sack and singing with crows can't shape up now but I'll whistle skip and dream steam-sails and dream love Windows and no unwatched sub will die without my fingertips grazing his just forearm laz man though wish I coulda met Saxon as a freshman that's what I wish back when I wan absurd yet sane She could have shoved that teetering mind back into my chest some, or all the way I know, I know We shall cave and live again I know this because I am always surprised to see people still think they continue on and permanently confounded coz I have this matter of heart laden with light silken elses to unresolve, desituation, naked down and twirl over the sky and Josh sees ital it, ma'am See what I just did with my hat brim, neighbor? What a unique sun today. Whoa whoa who's who don't show me your confrontation battalion Jesus Christ Sure got You to yell at me! FUCK your fair grounds. You who must admit nothing. Got im good false thief cries like amazed kids clutches turns to Him and hangs as the fisticuffs runs out into golden season. it's true again. fuck yes sorta, man unbound and outside woman is that man and her child too unbound twice and going back in, pailing orbs of water and the pleased peaceful exchange of a matched wish and gifts of socks and stopped time for the mantle and the manger's try again tomorrow We shall uncertain, unsort We shall unconvince forever We shall. My God Jesus Christ I pray and love but cannot spring for You ital just now Thas Firework Hands I am sorry for misspelling with a fever it's just so I can attend services without walking or in private jet news over being the zipline in Congro, have you written facts in your ears, or been many over the plains in wavy v's like Maggie's voice exposing how Madisonville Kay Why gets to survive I was lost under the sky and the mower was breaking I swirled across the hilltop like the top of the dot and cried "Mom! Mom!" and not even bent more like fell into making a fearless sobface against my knotty wrists but there were no tears and the sky was the water they'd reached, i can't, i can't continue not die too **** Continue to autograph apples as this donkey stops looking like a Toyota or what is driven as cities cascade now, threaten to tumble now and again all for the emperor bribing the umpire with pollen, friend. **** Colin, listen up again, once your face is felt, it'll open and stay true meet another's face at last, man, Man so you know it's Charlie in contact with everything, bro, At length as a peach with peaches, my beloved species, over but not over and done with you know what If no one understands what the community college means, no one has ever propelled their buoyed shards a little distance either way in surreal damage, as though indecision powers fact and fate. Oqbsession rebuking possible newrn surpr exactly as before it was so that I see what you mean when you do not do that in total darkness, Austin, Texas blurring apart as a person's three names for some witness on a pole I keep thinking I haven't suffered for some time now or as accidental seduction of much of the atlantic but humless screen looks at me like that Fie She said please what is it can you tell me and I said I believe I am a celestial possession of david milch and denis johnson, two who have been careful never to associate or clearly identify as avatars, trying to incarnate and become if my attention ever truly dries up and crosses and you'll be awarded custody, I'll sit at a decayed desk in your backyard and shimmer untalked to while all things that aren't green stay secret Did all that happen, did I crush my mind like a book, in order to have relativity explained to me a second time? Could I not stand for being distant from the poor if we're being executed for thinking we're here Am I being coaxed into bringing Charlie! She looked at me lost like I was found guilty of lying to my head like I was overwas what she was I think how it works is most of this breakage will be seemingly as I increase right here although I do wish that I was myself my love Colin as Colin There was a guy in the hospital cutting out and when lucid saying I think I'm Christ we said I like the way this guy thinks but to myself, softly, so that I knew A Word was listening, i whispered, I think he's on to something. Measure me for the river and sell me down the river in the river so the craft can convert survival of dragon fireworks from the first shore. Make me a cute monster, any cute monster, knock my forehead back with a hot, rushing brand. Lindelof, I think you belong with physicians and colleges, call out to me from a pixel and remind me to write fiction, not these ants covered with poems, We who shall go down in history as another person scapegoating truth while being tag you're it, I am? You are, You got to be okay before you shimmered Peace you alienated goody sack of shit and bones Enlightened counsellor told me a story about the hope he felt when his three year old daughter was sick, how it left when he knew she would die, to be unreplaced, the hope, and the acceptance meant everyone could take part in her dying, and she could go surrounded, held, and loved. I said everything you say means what I'm thinking and you mean me, and he said oh no, you're not going to die a physical death, two or three years as I keep reminding you thats usually how long it takes me can you hang on for two or three years and then the heaving veil fell into place again and i choked on the sun and couldn't look into his dish eyes in this galaxy or see Emily Ashmore anymore my unfriended atmosphere swirling with false starts and trampoline thoughts and his mug with a statement in various sized oval letters similar to the ones on the wall spelling out respect but this one about hi how are y-do have the moon if it's a rose face opening too Tricked truth in half that is surgeried myself into parody due to fearing the poor and needing to help the poor because the poor are owned by violence and Openess, I say. I feel retarded, i said, At the table, shaking my brow between my two faint fingers. You are, she said. What!? I laughed. I was just saying that because I thought you said it in conversation after an accident that made you sad, needing to be consoled and made hilarious to forget. Never forget you're retarded, she said. When you have to anticipate teaching someone who wont be taught At what point do you begin to slaughter yourself or after, while long returning have to ex out glamour so as not to see the gulls sparkle through waves God when will you kill me? I know that grave's Yer Name jilted at the dance that was on Friday in honor of acceptance, caress my melt with verve Coughing up my father's heart Come to find out I was Gollum. Hey Steven your poor man how's it feel to do well to be the keeper of responsibility while your grate breathes and the gutter conceals pecked out eyes you can clean with your hands and count He said I'm not a big fan of the bible where it puts its hands Just cause you aint got chains for wings doesn't mean get mad, water eyes, rebuke me fast, when will the two of us just the two of us understand where we are? I apologized for the tornado and the medieval human evil and she said oh no, I'm guilty of that too. "Holy annoyance" as claiming omnipresence. Is it all spaz-work? I tsked, she reassured shore is, and bucked irresponsibility, And I pointed out a thing of names shivering to be regarded and consoled. She took notes and threw them away simply like the roof. Her smiling glimmering deeply alight crescent eyes, naturally why'd you take off to the moon and blow so much of its surroundings off, kiteshit. What was this part. said she, I feel the same way, Just not quite so imaginary anymore. Ridiculous wife in a good way I am tarzan's invention and a faked human being installed with streaming leagues of humanity and that thing you do, uncollected but not so sleepy as to bypass a travesty for brunch, I'll step around your child as I climb into this sun car's backseat since we are all for use in ferrying our fingers into green 125 lb one I wonder if i scarily see the relationship in a person to life and to emptiness flipping across a notch like notations I go whole days without thinking of enlightenment or pretending to be a Russian prisoner but once I rode on the eternal haunches of a grizzly through the entirety of Merway, it's length in a legend, his changeless roar, and the entire time feeling him swat down love, my eyes clamped closed in horrified assumption, until we snoozed in a slanted field for two tiring ones Trajectory You brought me watermelon and see-through spray for the houseplants you were also bringing, at the last minute, and searched through the dynamic and then stepped out because you believed I needed space, but it wasn't like that, or like I did it for art, I was humming for all truths but very distracted within, thinking about you in an earlier period when you weren't being ceaselessly halted by murmurings or was that me, now, and then, anyway, apart from the confusion I see you standing out on breezy porch shadows forgetting you're looking at the sky while deciding something other than if my brain's far too devastated, picking up and setting down the molten strand on your unfreckled brow and undaunted and rescued Daddy was a monster Mama was a angel They wanted boredom, quiet, dark humor and to be away from the peeps but the trauma it is so much, so much the clearly unsubstantiated circumstances the chilling behavior repulsing my authenticity the loss of children the loss of children the loss of children never twirl through the gates of security again! Graduating Class, Am I really some satanic monster, I mean... you're in law school and your eyes are wet or like youre alive, yet your accents sound of ways of dying, and I'm roaming forests and eating children. Seems a little unfair. Have you been in God's enlightened Kingdom of Heaven yet? As of this writing, I may or may not, but I'm crazy about you if we're all tethered there, in these saint couples cant choose legitimate words bars in Plainmouth, Minnesota, town really fabulously dwarfed by actual love and crazy explosions and all those millions of liquors I'll never drink now, combustions that sound like games all of us arranged in grade school, really, my number changed out and written in black felt-tip and fucking true terror ink eep on a white stall in Your holy war. Taking on sickness in response to their universal need for support It's how I died once already but now need to die for real before I really die to keep alive how all these people are in the book You threw up your hands around about I killed him, I killed her! Please God! No! Goddammit Colin FUCK your bullshit said my love I've never lied I announced Eh she said sympathetically I'm out of humor That came out wrong I said She said like you You and I, I uncorrected sneering genetically without enmity and hurrying to include all definitions But good God did knowing you ever hurt and ruin me seriously seriously What's that you say She said in his world good wins yess, and drank beer not liquor from buttercups, smacking her dashing lips and reclining and waiting for summer to come, the ancient time to find a dude to love, waiting that flavor wait, totally fucked and touching the aqueous shelf where the trembling goods torch their glassine borders shifting unclearly like outside at sweetly befriended anytime my feet are uneven my legs have no tone or change but are true at last true at last like the slopes where the future is claimed but shan't occur although Alison will cause she will it them appleseeds, least I think so if I'm a real boy. But If I'm a real boy I got my face hacked off and shrunk to reach the airflow in my nose but listen, at least I am not from where I live. People as Sprinkles At first any newly author's voice pows my inability, it is not any comprehended for at least four years or all just watching with ashley vino who has perched downtown for several days says what day will I be taking you in my drowned arms so your emotions can be ungagged and unleashed, ashley I am not trying to remember ungenerously or deceive that way, just take me home without. I am a little horse caught circling their human kitchen windows / nonsire fireplaces / clucking in there without attacking the afraid they laugh and laugh irrigating the air it's free Twinkling Under Straw Hat I can't defend myself, dying, isolating how I'm doubled, la ka ching lake, this bridge rolled beyond flower waters this side of town with men and women who deny sleeping with ten year olds of either sex and see I heard you and used it thank you from acts, will you stroll laughing after the thing with the peers and drinks and the clovers and turn to white on the road to the hospital bed covers sobbing my sounding flashed name, and call for faaaacebooook pictures of glad women fake charging and admittant-smiling about it and tarnation dashing back to thwack into pole postures and shoot bigly outlandish guns at what I had known to be the sky At two you must intimidate them with intoxication and return them to paralysis and their ending chairs by the pool and deck which fake out the mesa horizons in your purpose of actually being a child or less who freakily monster lied to be killed by people who hate child molestors and love faaammme. Ital harsh warrior solidity breathing through your haaands ahhhhhh ital your life thought it was made of didn't I wreck yez better believe it and so fucking what you terrorist you grace allegiant cross-bones heartfelt by sandy all-feelinged fishes who breeeaaathe Stop. MY NAME'S COLIN I ORCHESTRATE THE FORESTS AND PERFORM FOR WILD LOVED LANDS HAVE YOU ENCOUNTERED MY CAAAAAMP where I sleep in theatres of ivy bow, bye, kiss, bye, hi

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Fuck this blood we consciously roll around in she drolled and then pretended to have an exclaiming face at some elderly and then wrapped herself in his arms and looked back, said what, and kissed To his detriment, and he thought I shouldn't have wanted to be a poor drug kid The universe added ten thousand delivery jobs but we rayed from hospitals so were in marsh evenings lovely green-sun trees weird looking in reflections for water our toes uncovered and our faces entranced by the nails this dawn body will be raised up over a cheer and a prison in the lop-smelling dusk Poli Stalemate Deputy The left found home and the right crushed justice and the center was not appeased by exception, it's bitterness, or oh but of course you may befriend me once again in Apple June, do you want to come over and sit still while I move around the crazy-looking waterfall lit roomlawn and without peace live? You came but you never came if there was nowhere to light up the come to sticky stencils clashing for the right to sway on the surface of my tongue in heirloom boardgame with the vials on the floor somebody look my clue kills dances and somebody quick kill my noose's maker, me in fast room called sweep away trash then next follow the lack in the messiah according to the savior's secret in our hearts done away with or at least dumbed down across the one face love I have cut from parkland to hospital and back always behind others watching them live at an exuberant pace as I thrashed the cut in my head because I could not engage or speak marriage or see you in Kentucky as you left me again and again your pulse whining like a scarab is flushing out my world Twinkling under Straw Hat I can't defend myself, dying, isolating how I'm doubled, la ka ching lake, this bridge rolled beyond flower waters from acts, will you stroll laughing after the thing with the peers and drinks and the clovers and turn to white on the road to the hospital bed covers sobbing my sounding flashed name, and call for facebook pictures of glad women fake charging and admittant-smiling about it and tarnation dashing back to thwack into pole postures and shoot bigly outlandish guns at what I had known to be the sky At two you must intimidate them with intoxication and return them to paralysis and ending chairs by the pool and deck which fake out the mesa horizons in your purpose of actually being a child or less who lied to be killed by people who hate child molestors and love faaammme. Ital harsh warrior solidity breathing through your hands ahhhhhh ital your life thought it was made of didn't I

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Alison stood in front of the oversized steel skeleton guarding the lobby of the university. She gazed from a small distance and next bounded up to it clumsily, involuntarily, feeling its distressing cheekbones. She felt like draping an arm around it, cheering it up. Huh...She turned her face, her mouth gaping, examining its peculiarities. Well, she said, as long as I’m in your chilling company... She lit on the floor and waited boringly. She sleepily saw half of Charlie go BOO Alison yaready get ready let's go touch God. Charlie...hush...please...I want to sleep... Alright. Wait! She clutched his ghost lapels and zoomed his phantomness to her face. Watch out for me, okay? See that no harm comes to me, got it? He sobbed with sacrifice; her hands fell away; she watched the white floor until he’d gone. When she woke up it was time to be admitted, choose classes, and receive a dorm.

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