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top 3 films that turn you bisexual as a kid

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ベルサイユのばら 愛の光と影

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THE ROSE OF VERSAILLES // REVOLUTIONARY GIRL UTENA

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Astrology is so 2020, reblog this with your anime big 3. Mine are revolutionary girl utena sun, naruto rising and the rose of versailles moon

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How do you fall back in love with life?

clean your room.  clean space, uncluttered space, space that doesn’t have miasma clinging to it can work wonders.  clean the dishes.  sweep.  take out the trash.  peel the clothes off the floor and wash them, and then actually fold/hang them.  take a long shower.  scrub behind your knees.  brush your teeth.  (this can be utterly exhausting, but try to get it done in a day, if you can.  the end result is worth it.)

pull out your notebook.  it doesn’t need to be a new notebook, but preferably one that you don’t usually write in, or that you haven’t touched in a while.  fuck moleskins.  the yellow legal pad will work fine.  sit in your room, or in the park, or in the library, and write a list.  count clouds.  describe all the colors that you see, and note patterns that arise.  sketch the cracks in the walls.  note the shape light makes when it enters a space.  talk about what the air tastes like, smells like.  what sounds are there?  even the white nose, break that down: air planes, fans, cicadas, anything.  remind yourself that you are sitting in the middle of a space brimming with detail.  remind yourself that you are not in nothingness and emptiness.  your world is fathomless.  it has potential.

drink cold water and try to eat something that isn’t processed.  it does not need to be fancy.  buy yourself an apple with the change between your couch cushions.  eat it outside.  if you’re someone who walks, walk somewhere afterwards, just to stretch your legs.  take your fucking meds.  remember that its a good thing that you are inside your body.  your body is a fantastic and endlessly intricate machine, and even though society has smacked a bunch of poisonous ideas on it, that doesn’t change its inherent worth and splendor.  take care of it.

read a novel.  underline your favorite lines, and write phrases that twist your heart inside your chest on the back of your hand with an ink pen.  read a novel like it’s poetry.  read poetry, something decadent but unpretentious.  watch a movie you haven’t seen before.  if there are free art galleries near you, walk through one.  take your time.  let yourself bask.  if there are patterns in what makes your soul ache, write those patterns down – marbles arches or soot crumbling bricks or dandelions or descriptions of dresses or whatever it is, write them down.

your chosen family is important.  remember, they picked you as much as you picked them.  the love has no obligation.  it is given freely and it is given from a place of compassion.  you are not a burden.  if you need to breathe, take a minute by yourself and just exist, but remember to go back to your people.  when they need you, listen and be gracious.  always be gracious.  the universe sometimes remembers things like that.

listen to new music.  link jump on youtube or related artist jump on spotify or ask the chap beside you in the cafe what their favorite band is, and listen to that.  listen to something that you don’t usually listen to.  we tend to tie up a lot of memory with music.  we are falling in love again.  the soundtrack needs to be specific to that.  

allow yourself to indulge in romantics.  press flowers in old books.  play movies with subtitles and mouth the words.  dance in your room.  wear something that makes you feel good, even if you wouldn’t wear it in public.  write your chosen family letters, even if you hand deliver them.  write poetry, even awful poetry.  revel in its awfulness.  eat dark chocolate and when your chosen family want to go out, try to go out with them sometimes, even if its just to the market.  

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Start where you are

Avoid wasting time, energy and money like I did. I heard someone say once that most of leveling up is just having the money to do so. Since not everyone has 10,000$ to drop on an overnight physical glow up, it has to be done in phases. 

When I started leveling up I was so overwhelmed with all this information I didn’t what to do with. I spent the first year wasting resources on steps I wasn’t ready for. Only to have to step back and start over at the beginning of 2021. I didn’t even have an idea of what I really wanted at the end of my journey. Physically, romantically or career wise. I just knew I wanted to be rich and different than I started. 

The glow up is a journey so it may take over a year or so to complete fully but it’s so worth it. 

This is in order of what should be done and cost. 

General level up

Workout routines 3-4x a week at home that you are excited to do!

Get in the habit of drinking 2 liters of water a day

Fix your sleep schedule! 8hrs a night.  

Nails grown and done yourself

Pick 5 hairstyles to rotate

Eyebrows waxed, tweezed, or threaded. 

Have makeup and makeup remover. 

For now just use drug store makeup. As long as it looks good and doesn’t break out the skin no one can tell where you got it from. Besides drug store makeup has gotten much better over the years. 

Makeup needed: Foundation, primer, mascara, eye liner, lip liner, blush, contour, lashes, concealer, eyeshadow, setting spray/powder + Brush set.

Daily makeup style picked out

Learn to sew and fix your own clothes to fit properly

Get a notebook to track every single expense for the glow up journey 

Take online free courses/lessons. Pick up like 4 or 5 new skills to beef up your resume or your social intrigue.

Sit down with a snack, a pen, a notebook and read the blogs you look up to.

What’s the point of having access to all these tips, tricks and life hacks if its just a reblog to be tagged and forgotten or worse lost in the shuffle of your blog?

Read. 

Just in general. Read for fun. Whether its good, bad, trashy, or so bad it’s good. All reading is time well spent. 

Also read self improvement novels.There are so many of them. Pick a category (ex personal finance, emotional growth, eating well, beauty, nutrition, time management, persuasion, procrastination, seduction, romance, friend making, mental wellness, strategy, investing) and go wild. Finish at least 2 a month. 1 a month if taking notes.  

Cost: 87$ max

Nest egg

Make an emergency fund of 1,500$. 3,500$ would be ideal.

1,500$ for real emergencies only! 1,500$ saved in 1 year is 30$ a week. 60$ a week for 6 months. 107$ a week for 14 weeks. 

2,000$ for later upgrades. It’s a slush fund so you don’t have to worry about finding money for whatever you need later. 

To save 3,500$ in 1 year 67$ a week or 135$ biweekly or 291$ a month. In 6 months 582$ a month, 270$ biweekly, 134$ a week. 

There’s no reason to look like a million dollars and have 5$ in my bank account. Priorities. 

This can be done while in the General level up and Polish phase. 

Cost: Time. Discipline needed. 

Polish

New outfits that compliment your body shape. 

I will continue to sing the praises of capsule closets. Its the easiest way to go shopping and have a bunch of outfits for next to nothing. I recommend 23 pieces: 3 pants, 4 dresses, 3 skirts, 7 shirts and 2 jackets/coats and 2 pairs of shoes.

2 quality purses (1 large/1 small) 

Consignment stores have luxury bags at 50-75% off.

Gym membership (paid off for a full year) 

Take some pressure off your own shoulders by paying for it in full. Planet fitness 10$ a month, 10$ down + fees comes out to 180$ a year. 

Go 3-4x a week. For at least 30 mins of sweating. 

2 perfumes for your signature scents.

One for casual day to day wear to work, to the store, to school, to hobby classes. One for special occasions like dates, events, company parties. 

Quality Makeup that works with your skin type.

Oily, dry, or combination. Your face is your baby. Treat her well. 

New glasses that fit your face shape or contact lenses. 

Keep up with your nails, hair, eyebrows and healthy habits.

Cost: $$$

Lifestyle changes. Experiment!

Lifestyle (diet) change. 

Research and experiment until you find one that keeps you full, satisfies you and allows you to eat your favorite snacks/meals in moderation. 

Skincare routine

Makeup remover, cleanser for morning and night, toner, serum, essence, anti-aging creams, moisturizer, sleep mask, exfoliator, sunscreen. 

I started with the Korean 10 step skincare routine to find what worked for me and got rid of the steps I didn’t like or didn’t need. Like sheet masks, and essences. 

Full Body Beauty Routine put together: 

Skincare, shower routine, haircare, nail care, below the neck skincare.

Upgrade your room, sleepwear and loungewear!

Invest in a room you actually want to work and relax in.   

Map out that business you wanna start.

Business plan, website content, business cards, goals, products, licenses needed, social media presence. Look into grants to get your funding.

Write down short term and long term savings goals

Saving mindlessly makes people more likely to spend it because its money in a jar, coming out of their check for no defined reason. Give yourself a reason and you’ll be less likely to mess up your own progress. Examples of goals:

3-6 months of emergency savings- long term

Retirement- long term

Business start up- short term

Last round of upgrades- short term

A house- long term

Investing money- short term

Vacation money- short term

Make a budget and start saving in earnest!

Set aside time for studying, reading, relaxing and recharging daily.

Make a vision book/board

Make a lookbook of outfits, makeup styles and aesthetics you love

5-10 year goals written down

Pick out any further degrees, certifications, licenses you want for your career. 

Pick up new hobbies.

Keep reading, learning and gaining skills from free courses.

Research different personas and brands to find which you want to represent.   

Clean up your social media presence.

Cost: Time, patience and $$$

Full reinvention

Get a lock box for your birth certificate, SSN, check book, warranties, and receipts. 

Get your teeth straightened and whitened.

Braces, wisdom teeth pulled, veneers, filled in crowns ect. The smile is the most inviting thing about the face. Make it pop. 

If you wear glasses or contacts: laser eye surgery.

Body hair removal. Laser or Electrolysis.

Both work. Electrolysis destroys the hair follicle but the sessions take longer and may cost more because it may take 6 or visits to do the full area. Laser is cheaper but most women have to continue to go back for maintenance and its easy to burn black women, even in an office. Home laser devices usually don’t service brown to dark skinned women. 

Start seeing a dermatologist, nutritionist, and personal trainer monthly

Get a passport booklet

If you want plastic surgery, start saving/get it done. 

Start that business! Order the business cards, design the website, create the products. 

Get a closet full of clothes that matches your persona or personas. 

Sets of outfits for Work, Casual, & Formal settings. You can pick different styles for each type- Cottage core casual, business barbie for work, and 1950′s pinup for formal events.

This is where you go all out. Nothing but quality fabrics, statement pieces, and jewelry that will last at least 2 years or more. 

I’d go with a 40 piece capsule closet: 10 tops, 10 skirts, 10 Dresses, 5 Jeans/pants, 3 shoes, 2 Jackets.

Don’t forget stockings, panty hose, breast pasties, and bra strap holders.

Examples of styles: Cottage core, classic feminine, sexy, cute, alternative, sporty, business, y2k, 70s, 80s, 50′s, soft glam, barbie/bratz doll. Ectera.  

Take those hobby classes

Get your scholarships, degrees and certifications

Pick a persona and create the social media, and irl community presence.

Keep track of your costs! 

Treat it like a business and you’ll see where you’re wasting money, how you can improve and create a budget for future use. 

Keep notes too- what brand was the lipstick you bought, what color, how did it feel on you, did it look good, how long did it last, did it come off easily when eating, would you buy it again? 

Sections: One time static costs. Recurring costs, Product page with notes. 

Cut out toxic people. 

Anyone that makes you feel less than or perpetually uncomfortable should have their access to you provoked. 

“I did XYZ to better myself, and this is how they treat me?”

It’d be like paying 2,500$ for a seat at the La Scala, Milan for the best classical music concert in the world only to be behind a pillar in the corner with someone next to you on their phone all night. 

Or applying for a job after you got the highest degrees available in your field, were valedictorian, and only applied for established multimillion dollar companies. Only for them to offer you 10$ an hour on a position worth 50$ an hour. 

This one is last for three reasons. One it’s not always as simple or easy as blocking them and never speaking again, an exit strategy may be necessary. Two sometimes it pays, literally, to have these people around. If they have contacts I want I’ll get them before I go. If being around them cuts down the costs of something significant in my life I save the extra money while I plan my exit strategy. By the time I’ve left I’ve gotten my payment for any sabotage they’ve thrown my way. Three it’s an ongoing process. New friends can turn to new enemies in the right conditions. You may never be 100% free of having any snakes in your garden so it’s good to stay vigilant.

Cost: Time, Patience, Empathy for yourself, $$$$$

Slow down. Take it easy. Work smart. 

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Man, it's like, as a black woman, you always think for The Group, always, without even realizing that that's your default. You do and say and maneuver yourself however you have to to make sure everybody else's plates keep spinning, everybody else has what they need to keep their lives straight, everybody else is Good. You and what you want isn't apart of the equation because what you want is to maintain everyone else's equilibrium.

And that's why Olivia Pope just resonates with me. I GET HER. She's often criticized for being wishy-washy and not knowing what she wants, and that's fair but at the same time Olivia Pope's actions and decisions only really make sense to people who've been raised with a similar mentality.

Not sure if this was Shonda Rhimes' intention but Olivia Pope is as empathetic and nuanced a meta-commentary on black womanhood as I've ever seen on Primetime. Of course, she's a fixer, black women are primed from infancy to be "fixers," to carry and resolve others' burdens enthusiasticlly, and stoicly. Your problems are ours, and ours don't even rate.

That's why Olivia doesn't have an answer when the men in her life ask her what she wants. That's why she can't let herself ride off to Vermont with Fitz. Of course he's what she wants. Of course she'd like to be swept off her feet to the beautiful mountain estate he had built for her. But she can't. Because there are Problems. And she (like most black women) has been raised with the mindset that her happiness and What She Wants fall at the bottom of the list of priorities, and to ignore the needs of the world she carries on her shoulders in favor of unconditional love and healing in the arms of the only person in her life to put her first would be selfish to the point of unforgivable.

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I thought this was perfect before and then Kerry Washington reacted to it. Send help. I’m not ok

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Black Boss Lady & Right Hand Man

Black Boss Lady:

Too badass to be stopped by workplace discrimination

By the book hardass

Essentially a Respectable Good Person

Right Hand Man:

Goes along with the Lady's plan but has wildly divergent goals/priorities/agendas

Usually categorised as the cowboy, rogue or all-purpose crazy person

Not excellent at decision making when left alone

Is uniquely competent in some special way that compensates for their myriad flaws

Exists in two states at all times - Lady's greatest asset and Lady's riskiest liability

Personal life has gone off the rails in a serious way at least once

Will act out or straight up betray the Black Boss Lady at least once

Will readily admit that he "has issues"

Has a convoluted or mysterious backstory

Very flexible moral code.

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BADASS WOMEN

If they slapped me in the face I would thank them

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Fairy Tale Laws: How Fairy Tales and their Worldbuilding work

Who follows me knows I'm mega into mythology and folklore. One of my favorite pieces of folklore and fantasy literature is the Fairy Tale. Since I was a child I was always draw to the magical world of Disney films and their darker literary counterparts.

I love fairy tales, yet in my opinion they continue to be one of the more misunderstood and neglected genres out there.

So, as a Disney fan and avid fairy tale reader, in this essay I show how the genre itself generally works and which principles rule their whimsical world

Fairy Tales, Myths and Fables

The thing that fairy tales, myths and fables have in common is that they all find their origins in the oral tradition.

They were fantastical tales, not told specifically for children but deeply enjoyed by them, that were transmitted through generations.

Both fairy tales and myths don't follow real world logic, instead following their own dream-like logic, in a sequence of weird and fantastical events, that are magical and intriguing to the listener, but essentially normal to the in-universe characters.

Often than not there aren't any explanations of why these events happen and their impact of those in-universe societies, they just happen. Animals talk, mythical creatures live along with human societies just fine, inanimated objects come to life, people seem to turn into animals all the time, etc, and nothing of that seem to ever change the status quo.

The thing that differentiate the fairy tale from the myth, is that the myth is supposed to have happened in our world, but in a far off past. They are supposed to explain how our world came to be, and they have a very strong religious importance. The fairy tale on the other hand is not supposed to be took seriously. It's a fun story that the older generation tell to the younger generation. It can pass deeply important life or religious values, but that's not their main point. They are fairy tales, not fables.

The point of the fable is to transmit a moral. The point of a fairy tale is to transport the listener into a fantastical journey.

Fairy Tales vs. Oral Stories

Although many folk stories became immortal fairy tales, not all fairy tales came from oral tradition. Actually, some can be traced back to specific authors.

The Little Mermaid, the Ugly Duckling and the Steadfast Tin Soldier are all considered immortal fairy tales, yet they were all created by famous danish writer Hans Christian Andersen. A lot of his stories are authoral, and all are considered true fairy tales.

The term "Fairy Tales" actually comes from the french "conte de fées" and was coined in the 17th century by Marie-Catherine Le Jumel de Barneville, Baroness d'Aulnoy, the Madame d'Aulnoy, a french writer who wrote about a world where love and happiness came to heroines after overcoming great obstacles.

These stories arise from the Préciosité, a French literary style in the 17th century, from "les précieuses", intellectual, witty and educated women who frequented the salon of Catherine de Vivonne, marquise de Rambouillet. Themes presented in these stories are the ideals of feminine elegance, etiquette and courtly Platonic love, all hugely popular with female audiences, but scorned by men.

Telling fairy tales was a popular préciosité parlor game, and they should be told as if spontaneously, even though they all were carefully prepared. This style served as influence for Charles Perrault and Gabrielle-Suzanne Barbot de Villeneuve.

Villeneuve herself was the original author of Beauty and the Beast, and although the story is heavily inspired by older legends like Cupid and Psyche, it still is an authoral story.

Even the Brothers Grimm and Charles Perrault, who were famous for being collectors of tales from oral tradition, gave their own twists and embellishments to their tales. For example, in many Cinderella tellings it's her mother's ghost who helps her. The Fairy Godmother is Perrault's invention.

So more than been just stories from the oral tradition, fairy tales as a literary genre are the reinvention of the old tropes found in the folk stories under a more sophisticated polish, for a new public.

Fairy Tale as a literary genre

In a way I consider the Fairy Tale a sibling genre to Magical Realism. As TV Tropes puts:

"In Magic Realism, events just happen, as in dreams. [...] Magical realism is a story that takes place in a realistic setting that is recognizable as the historical past or present. It overlaps with Mundane Fantastic. It has a connection to surrealism, dream logic, and poetry."

Both use a surreal, almost poetic internal logic with little to no explanation. Magical Realism is the occurrence of a fantastical event in a realistic setting, in a fusion between the mundane and the magical world.

Fairy Tales are similar because they often deal with very domestic topics and subjects. The protagonists often are normal people with very mundane goals. They don't want to save the world, they want to save themselves and their loved ones.

Cinderella and Snow White for example, are more concerned with escaping from their abusive families than being cultural or legendary heroes like in the myths. Hansel and Gretel are trying not to die from starvation, and Red Riding Hood is trying to visit her sick grandmother. Regardless of class status, these are people with their own problems that find in the fantastical events a escape from them, or a even worse danger.

This is not a universal rule, as some characters are more heroic and there's more in stake, but generally the heroes are domestic heroes and it's only their lives that are in stake.

The difference between the Magic Realism and the Fairy Tale, is that while in the Magic Realism you can easily point where the realistic setting ends and the magical one begins, the fairy tale goes even further, and the lines between the worlds are way more muddled.

Worldbuilding in Fairy Tales

Now, that's the most important part. Fairy Tales are a sub-genre to Fantasy, but while in the other genres the magic world is described in the minimal details, often with rich details about the in-universe cultures and their rules, the Fairy Tale maintain the magic world as vague as possible. That's because it uses what I call "soft-worldbuilding".

Part of the appeal of the fairy tale is to transport the reader in a fantastical journey, but in order to do that they use as little details possible, allowing the reader to try to fill in the gaps. That's in order to avoid the magic world of feeling too real or too close to reality. The reader needs to have a sense of wonder and intrigue, and if you started to describe your world in all its details, it will become too grounded, and the wonder and the intrigue will be lost.

Said that, you need some basic rules, otherwise everything will be incredibly incoherent. You reader needs to understand how the magic world works and their rules, but they also need to be slightly lost, discovering all the details along the way and be amazed by them, lost in a mystery that they will never find all the answers.

To illustrate this, look at the differences between the Middle-earth and Narnia. One is a standard fantasy world, the other is a fairy tale world. J.R.R. Tolkien drew inspiration from the epics, C.S. Lewis drew inspiration from fairy tales and childhood stories.

The Middle-earth is grounded on its own rules, with their own races, cultures, languages and myths. Narnia is a playground were everything magical is allowed. Greek mythology creatures? Okay. Roman gods? Okay. Father Christmas? Okay. Jesus? Of course!

One is worried about all the small details, the other wants everything as vague and simple as possible, as to ensure the wonder and the intrigue will never be lost the reader.

When you're dealing with a fairy tale world you have way more freedom than the standard fantasy world. You don't need to think too deeply in the details. You can use the Rule of Funny and the Rule of Cool as much as you want, as long as it's minimal consistent and coherent

Fairy Tale Laws

This are some basic rules and principles that I believe rule over the fairy tale genre

Establish rules of how the world works. Keep it consistent and coherent. That's your base

Not every fantastical event needs a deep explanation, and magic is not allowed as an universal explanation

Keep it simple. Don't worry too much about the small details.

You don't want your world to be too grounded in reality. A little escapism is key

Poetic logic and surrealism reigns

Have fun with all the weird and magical things that crowded your world. "Rule of Cool" and "Rule of Funny" reign

Never reveal too much to your reader. They need to constantly feel as if there is something more happening off the limits of your story

Domestic heroes (As Narnia and the old dragon slayer stories show, this is not an universal rule)

The overall tone can be darker and edgier, softer and lighter, or somewhere in the middle

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unpopular opinion lol–but as a black wlw 

i do feel that i’m starting to see soely and only,  a lot of butch/masc wlw in relationship with femme/smaller white and light skinned wlw. there isn’t anything wrong with that, at all–and before people try to put that on me i need you to understand that i don’t think there’s anything wrong with that. 

but i do think there is an issue of lighter skinned/white wlw who are femme/feminine always and ONLY seeking out or having specific types of preferences toward more masculine/dark skinned black wlw and only thinking that black wlw can exist that way. i mean, on one hand preference is preference, but on the other hand sometimes it’s annoying seeing light skinned/white femme wlw always talking about how their black butch/masc gfs are strong (sometimes scary), take care of them, protect them and make them feel safe. Or at least, implying that and having online personas in that way (like i can’t quite explain it, but it says a lot when you have the white / light skinned one looking cute and dainity while she is being carried by her strong black gf/wife on social media or her doing domestic stuff while her black gf/wife is working out)

similar to how a lot of white and light skinned women (either het or wlw) end up in relationships with black men and carry these ideas that black men exist to protect them and be larger/protective of them–and only looking for black men on those stereotyped aspects of them–i’m starting to see same gender wlw relationships with butch and masc black wlw the same way.

wherein, nonblack/light skinned and white femme wlw only seek out and see black wlw in one way. and that is as their protectors, larger, scary, and care-takers while they get to keep this persona that they are the small, innocent, dainty wife that gets to live a wlw fantasy with their big, gruff masc / butch black gf. but we don’t call it racist because it’s queer…but i mean, it is.

like i rarely see a femme/feminine/smaller darker skinned black wlw with a butch/masc light skinned, non black or white parter being taken care of. it is always the other way around and IDK, it’s just something people should be aware of. preference is okay, but i think understanding the root of your preference by the world around you is also important because some of y’all have racist biases that you don’t wanna admit. 

don’t clown on this post. if you have an issue with it, i’m willing to hear it but please discuss it like an actual adult.

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My second-favorite line in The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe 2005 movie is, “Do not cite the deep magic to me, Witch; I was there when it was written.” and I need to take a moment to gush about how hilarious it is.

See, everyone’s turned that line into a meme, used to brag about how they were around when a cited event happened. (”Has anyone heard of this thing called the Mishapocalypse?” “Don’t cite the deep magic to me, I was there—”) So because that’s how the meme is used, you might think that Aslan is saying it with the same context of remembering when the Deep Magic was written.

But if you read The Magician’s Nephew, the line becomes a lot more hilarious because Aslan wasn’t just around when the Deep Magic of Narnia was written…

ASLAN WROTE IT!

Aslan is very obviously the son of the ultimate god of the weird multiverse in the series but, more than that, he is the God of Narnia. He is the Creator of Narnia. Every single thing that exists in Narnia exists because Aslan decided to sing a song that one time. He was the one who wrote the Deep Magic that binds the world. That’s what he’s cheekily saying when he growls, “I was there when it was written.” He’s not just saying that he’s old enough to remember when this happened. He’s saying that he’s the reason it happened. He remembers when it was written because he wrote it! That’s why this scene is so iconic.

It’s an arrogant fan asking a stranger if they’ve even read the book, only for that stranger to reveal that they’re the author of the book.

It’s Karen The Soccer Mom angrily reminding an exasperated manager of the rules that the manager created.

It’s a mortal asking a god if they remember the laws of physics.

It’s hilarious and glorious and I’m pretty sure that the cast and crew read The Magician’s Nephew (the actor who played The Professor definitely did) because just look at the way they have Aslan smirk, look at the way Jadis reacts:

That is the face of someone who just remembered that they’re dealing with a god—a god who has never forgotten that he’s a god, despite her memory loss.

(The best part is that Jadis was right there when Aslan created Narnia; she just became so arrogant that she…forgot she was dealing with a god, as one does.)

Also, in case you’re wondering, the exact line isn’t in the book, but the scene is just as hilariously petty. Jadis is like, “Do you remember the law?” And Aslan who 100% wrote the law and 100% remembers the law, is like, “Let’s assume I did forget the law; describe it to me in extensive detail.” 

Iconic. 

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AU in which the geography of Narnia literally, drastically changes after the Pevensies vanish:

the forests change their shapes and sprawl further and wider as the tree spirits search for their missing kings and queens

even when most of them have gone to sleep, they still seem to move, sometimes shifting five and ten feet over the course of a few decades. eventually, most are congregated near lanternwaste

the winter after their disappearance is the harshest in 15 years. it comes on early and doesn't clear up until May. In spring the fog rolls in, the kind that sinks and settles into the lungs and reintroduces diseases Narnia hasn't faced in well over a century

over time the mountains erode and crumble, creating valleys and passes and tunnels and caves that hadn't existed before. later visitors to Narnia are shocked and filled with dread at the sight: stony faces, inhuman faces, and as sad as a face can be, such that they look hardly like rock formations and more like the remains of sleeping, sorrowed giants

travel from Archenland into Narnia dwindles. shepherds and their flocks, children with wanderlust, and unlucky others pass through the mountains, but the hills before them start to shift. little landmarks disappear. creeks wind about in circles; trees and boulders close in around them. it becomes impossible to find their way

luckily, there's usually a kindly satyr to lead them back to the mountain pass. "since the sons of adam and daughters of eve have gone," he says, "Narnia wants them back. best not travel alone, lest you remind the hills of their kings. best not travel at all."

[willofthewhispleo]

[willofthewhispleo]

eternal gratitude to princess mononoke for giving me four of my fave girlbosses