PLEASE, LOVE ME. PT2
simon riley / reader
FIND PART ONE || read the full thing on ao3
tags: childhood friends, friends2lovers, virgin!reader, soft!simon, protective!simon, afab!reader, hurt/comfort, angst with a happy ending, MDNI
cw: reader is over 20, pining, masturbation (reader), loss of virginity, explicit workplace sexual harassment/assault, so much crying, one-sided love, not-really-unrequited love, vomiting, panic attacks, depression, crying, sex related shame, PTSD (reader), codependency but cute, self-deprecating thoughts, slut shaming, wet dream, dry humping, simon fucks up tho, reference to suicide & suicidal ideation, really nasty argument, reader hits simon sorry, apologizes tho!!!, reader struggles to orgasm, drinking, fooling around while drunk (no sex), breast play, fingering, orgasm denial, simon's a tease, p-in-v, cunnilingus, multiple orgasms, creampie, mating press, missionary, simon's dirty mouth, dirty talk, wet&messy, big cock, uncut simon bc i said so, reassurance & encouragement, some pain upon penetration, clit spanking, post-coital crying!!!!!!, aftercare, briefly edited so apologies for any lingering mistakes
note: this is part two and contains the gratuitous smut portion ur all looking forward to <3
you've loved him since you were children. after a confession when you were 14 went rejected, you vowed to never let your feelings be known again. but after an incident that left you hurt and fragile, you find it hard to keep that promise.
PART 2: 17.9k
total: 35.8k
Things seem to get much better between you. Your anger and resentment towards Simon diminishes significantly and you can finally say you feel comfortable around him again. You wouldnât say youâve forgotten everything that happened, you fear that the entire ordeal has left its scar on you.Â
But you finally feel ready to truly begin to work on yourself and get to a better place mentally.Â
Youâre humming to yourself as you dust the surfaces in your living room, cringing in disgust when you see how dusty a particular shelf was.Â
Just as you go to give it another swipe, your front door opens and Simon stumbles in, huffing from effort as he carries two armfuls of groceries.Â
âSimon!â you cry out, watching with wide eyes from the stepstool you stood on as he ungracefully dropped them on the floor, âWhy did you bring them all up here like that?â
âDidnât wanna make another trip,â he explained lamely, flexing his hands as he looked over all the bags.
âOkay, I guess,â you chuckle softly.Â
Simon finally looks up at you, âWhat are you doing?â
âCleaning,â you shrug, waving the duster at him, âI havenât felt like doing it until now so might as well get it done when I feel like it!â
Heâs quiet for a moment before he steps over the bags of groceries.His boots thunk heavily on the floor as he approaches you. Suddenly, he wraps an arm around your middle. You squeak in surprise when he very carefully and gently pulls you off of the stool and places you back onto your feet.Â
Then he walks away like nothing happened, snatching up a couple groceries up from the floor to take to the kitchen.Â
You decide not to comment on his behavior and simply choose to grab a couple of bags and help him out. When you get inside the kitchen, heâs already stuffing things into the refrigerator. You place the bags down and go back to pick some more up, transferring all the bags of groceries near him so he can easily put them away.Â
You notice one of the bags has some piping, lightbulbs, wires, and other things you canât identify.Â
âWhatâs all this?â you ask, holding the bag out to him when he turns to look.
He grunts, closing the fridge, âGonna fix some shit around here.â
âWhy?â you ask, scrunching your nose up as you place the bag on the counter.
âShithole needs it,â he mumbles, moving to start opening the cabinets, âSince you refuse to let me move you out of this place, Iâm gonna make sure it at least functions.â
You hum and nod your head. Simon had attempted to convince you to move out and into an apartment of his own choosing but you flat out refused. He was already paying the rent on this place, you werenât going to let him spend more money for a different place â because you know Simon would choose somewhere that would cost a lot more than your current flat.Â
But you couldnât deny, the idea of Simon doing a little manual labor around the apartment made your heart flutter in your chest. The way he took care of you and was willing to get his hands dirty just to make sure you were comfortable. The little domestic tasks you could imagine him doing.Â
It almost felt like something a husband would do.Â
You felt your cheeks flush immediately at the train of thought. How embarrassing and juvenile to think something like that
âI can cook dinner!â you mumble after clearing your throat.Â
Simon actually has the audacity to laugh. You frown as he shakes his head, closing the cabinet before turning to you.Â
âAbsolutely not,â he says.
Your jaw drops, âWhy?!â
âBecause,â he steps closer, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead before breezing past you, âYouâre a terrible cook, love.â
You open your mouth to retort but can only huff. Because heâs right. The last time you tried to make dinner for the two of you, you had confused cayenne with cinnamon and made the most diabolical stew known to man. He vowed to never let you cook anything that required more than boiling water since.Â
You pout your way back to the living room, mumbling a petulant, âFineâŠâ as you went.
You didnât catch the broad grin on Simonâs face as he watched you sulk away. He was just happy to see your vibrance returning before his very eyes.
True to his word, however, he began to do some random odd jobs around the apartment. He changed that damn leaky faucet in the kitchen first. He would never admit it but it was beginning to drive him completely mad. He swore he could hear it dripping into the metal sink basin in his dreams.
Then he fixed the piping in the bathroom so they would stop all that god-awful clanking that practically woke up the entire complex. But after that, he figured he might as well fix the piping under the sinks as well.
Thatâs when you saw him. On his back, big body sprawled out as he worked underneath the cabinet, wrench in hand and soft grunts of effort coming from him. His t-shirt rose up just a bit, exposing a small stretch of tummy and his happy trail. Every once in a while, you could see his muscles flex and it made your mouth go completely dry.Â
You felt like a Victorian man seeing his first ankle on a woman. Ridiculous.Â
Sure, youâd seen Simon shirtless countless times â hell, you walked in on him completely naked once or twice. But there was something particularlyâŠdelicious about him like this. Unaware, casual, just doing work.Â
It made a swell of heat settle in your abdomen. You squeezed your thighs together as you watched him. His biceps flexed and bulged, making the sleeve of his t-shirt grow taut around his skin. His muscles moved underneath the tattoos inked into his skin.Â
You dragged your eyes down his body, past his pecs, past the sliver of tummy. You imagined yourself crawling between those thick thighs and unbuckling his belt, tugging at the button of his jeans. You imagined getting to see his cock chub up inside his boxers before you would pull it out and wrap your lips around the leaking tip.Â
Salty, you imagine. Youâve always heard that menâs cum and pre-cum would be salty. Would Simonâs taste as bad as some of your friends had told you back in highschool? You hoped not. You couldnât imagine not enjoying every part of him â even his cum.
You wanted him to shoot in your mouth, let you taste it. You wanted to milk it out of him, give him no choice but to cum down your throat.
âAre you just going to stand there or do you need something?â his voice startled you out of your thoughts.
Wide eyed, you looked to meet his gaze but you found he wasnât even looking at you, still staring at the piped overhead.
âUm,â you cleared your throat, floundering for an excuse as to why you were ogling him like a piece of meat, âI didnât want to interrupt you. I-I was just wanting to make sure the shower was okay to use?â
He grunts, letting out a soft sigh before pushing himself out from under the sink, closing the cabinet before wiping his brow with the back of his hand, âYeah, go ahead and shower, love.â
You give him a tight-lipped smile, casting one last glance to see that his t-shirt had fallen back into place. Disappointing.Â
You trudge out of the kitchen and into the bathroom. Softly, you close the door and turn on the shower. The pipes donât clang when the water shoots through them. It brings a smile to your face.
Once youâre stripped and standing under the warm spray, you let your hands wander your body. First, you cup your breasts, watching your nipples harden under your own touch before you slide one hand between your thighs. Thereâs a slickness between your folds that's distinctly different from the water, itâs slippery and sticky. But it makes your touch against your clit easy.Â
You bite your lips to keep quiet, scared to death that Simon could hear you from under the sound of the water. You make quick, tight little circles against your clit. The bud is hard and twitches under your fingers. It makes the breath stutter out of your chest.Â
You need more room, you realize, hiking your foot up onto a shelf. It spreads you open just a little more, gives you a little more access for your fingers to play. You sigh, head tipping forward to watch as you circle your own clit.Â
But the more you touch yourself, the faster that tingling, warm sensation dissipates. You huff through your clenched teeth, frustrated.Â
Usually, you could at least feel the beginning of that peak forming but this timeâŠnot even close. So you shamefully close your legs and go about your shower as if nothing happened, taking care to wash the slick from between your thighs especially.
As you lay in bed that night, Simon breathing deeply beside you as he slept, you were lost in thought.Â
Surely, you were in the wrong for thinking about Simon like that â for getting wet at the sight of him. And then sleeping soundly next to him as if you werenât some kind of pervert. Maybe you should just confess and apologize to him.Â
No. You quickly admonish that thought, glancing over at his prone form. You couldnât bear to see him be disgusted by you. Heâd already rejected you years ago, finalized it and put the nail in the coffin so you would never be dumb enough to do it again.Â
What would he do if he found out about yourâŠattraction to him? He practically lived with you now, after everything happened. He was in your flat more than he was on base now. It was only a matter of time before he caught you with your hands dancing in your pants.Â
Your cheeks flushed at the idea. Part of you thought it hot â for him to find you needy like that, desperately playing with your clit as you try to make yourself cum.Â
But on the other hand, you could see the wrinkle of disgust in his brow and sneer on his face as he walked away. That outcome was not worth it, you decided.Â
With a sigh, you rolled over so your back faced Simon and closed your eyes for the night.Â
You both should have known better that the fragile peacefulness between the two of you was just that â fragile, balancing on a delicate precipice that could shatter at any moment.Â
The ring of his phone was the break.Â
âAnswer that for me, love!â he called from the kitchen where he was busy preparing dinner.Â
You leaned forward to check the number. It wasnât in his contacts but Simon never got calls from people unless he knew them. So you slowly slid the button over and accepted the call.Â
âHello?â you mumbled into the phone.
There was a beat of silence before a womanâs voice responded in kind, âHello?â
âUmâŠâ you swallowed down the apprehension that settled in your chest, casting a glance towards Simonâs back as he stood over the stove, âWho may I ask is calling?â
âIâm looking for Simon,â she said, sounding much more coy than a second ago. She knew his real name and that irked you. People from work always referred to him as Ghost, only those he considered trustworthy or friends were privy to calling him Simon.Â
âUm, heâs busy at the moment, can I take a message?â you ask, loud enough for Simon to hear in the kitchen if he was interested in intervening. But he didnât move.Â
âSure!â she giggled, âTell him that Victoria really wants to see him again and to call me so we can!â
You swallowed around the lump in your throat, âY-Yeah, sure. Iâll let him knowâŠâ
âThank you,â she cooed in a sultry tone, âOh! And tell him I really had a great time last time we were together and that Iâm looking forward to a repeat performance.â
âYeah. Iâll do that,â you assured, hoping you didnât sound as tense as you felt.Â
She giggled before the call disconnected and you were left glaring at his stupid stock phone wallpaper.
âWho was it?â Simon comes to the archway of the kitchen, leaning against the wall. You canât hear anything cooking anymore so you assume heâs finished dinner.
âVictoria,â you spit the name out like itâs poisonous, âSays she wants to see you again and she had a fantastic time with you last time.â
Simon shifts where he stands, looking down at his feet before looking back up to you, âAlright. Iâll call her back later.â
That sends knives straight through your heart. It aches so badly that you want to bite your own tongue off to make it stop.Â
Jealousy, you realize. Youâre fucking jealous. Some girl calls and asks for his dick and he just says okay?Â
Heâs not yours, you tell yourself. He can fuck whoever he wants.Â
But that does nothing to quell the inferno raging inside you.Â
Thereâs other feelings brewing inside you; rejection, fear, loss.
You feel bitter that youâre right there and he would still never choose you. Heâll always choose someone else because he doesnât see you like that. It feels like heâs throwing it in your face, just spitting at you to show you that he doesnât love you like you love him. He never has and he never will. Youâll never be an option to him because he doesnât want you.
Then youâre scared heâs going to leave you. Heâs going to go to this Victoria chick and leave you all alone so he can get his dick wet again. Just like last time. Maybe heâll like it so much he wants to stay with her. Maybe heâs going to leave you behind so he can start a new, happy life without having to worry about the dead weight thatâs been dragging him down since he was 8. You. His responsibility. His problem.Â
Youâre so scared that heâs going to be ripped from your grasp. That youâre going to lose him to someone else and itâs going to be you and your pathetic one-sided love for the rest of your life. Fuck, youâve loved him since you were 4. Youâve loved him for so long that it makes you nauseous to think about. How many people loved one person for this long?Â
Please, you wanted to cry to him, please love me.Â
Please, just love me back.
âSo youâre gonna go then?â you finally find your voice, bitterness and resentment thick in your tone, âYouâre gonna leave me to go to a booty call again?â
He stands up straight at that. Arms cross over his chest, he watches that way you glare at him, heated and teary-eyed. Hurt.Â
He knew you still werenât over the way he left you that time â when you needed him the most. Youâd been ignoring the residual hurt that lingered, intent on pretending that everything was fine. He had been doing his best to make up for it but it always felt like one step forward and two steps back with you.Â
âIâm not going anywhere,â he assures softly, âIâll call her back to tell her that it wonât happen.â
He tries his best to remain level-headed and soft, to be reassuring like he knows you need. But your expression doesnât change. You continue to glare at him with that furious, hurt look in your eyes.Â
Suddenly, you stand.Â
âI donât believe you,â you hiss, turning your back to him, storming down the hallway.Â
He almost winces when he hears how hard you slam the bedroom door. He thinks about going back there to talk to you but decides against it. You need some space to calm yourself down.Â
He eats the dinner he made for both of you alone, putting your half in the fridge for later. He goes about the apartment, locking the door and turning out all the lights. Then he gets to the bedroom door and goes to turn the knob and it doesnât budge.Â
Despite himself, he laughs. He jiggles the knob, jerks the door a little harder like itâll open with a bit of force. And it might, itâs a flimsy ass door if heâs being honest â heâs forced bigger and heavier doors open before.Â
He snaps your name, humor gone from his voice. You donât answer.Â
âOpen the damn door,â he snaps, trying the knob again. He gets silence in return so he slams his fist against the surface. The sound is loud enough that it makes his own ears ring, âI said open the door. Iâm not playinâ this game with you, sweetheart.â
âSleep on the couch, Simon!â he hears your wobbly voice call back. Of course youâre in there crying, he thinks.
âIâm not sleepinâ on the fuckinâ couch,â he hisses, leaning his forearm against the door, resting his head against it with a sigh, âOpen the door and letâs talk.â
âDonât wanna talk to you,â you whine, bratty as all hell. He would have laughed if he wasnât so damn pissed, âWhy donât you go sleep with Victoria since you like her so much.â
You donât know why you say that last part. You donât want him to go to her, you donât want him to go anywhere. The thought of it brings more tears to your eyes.Â
Simon is silent on the other side of the door for a long while. You almost think he walked away and succumbed to the couch. You wouldnât actually let him sleep on that awful thing, of course. You justâŠyou donât know what the end goal here is, if youâre honest.
âFine,â he finally spits, âIf thatâs what you want, Iâll fuck off and find Victoria.â
You hear the floorboards creak under his weight as he walks away. You sit up straight in bed at that, eyes wide as you listen to him stalk through the house. You swear you hear the jingle of his keys and thatâs what has you lurching out of bed in a panic.
You almost trip over the sheets as they tangle around your legs but you manage to free yourself and wrench the door open.
âSimon!â you practically shriek, rounding the corner of the hallway to find him standing with his back to you, facing the door.
Heâs got his hoodie and mask on, boots firmly on his feet and keys in hand. He stands still, back straight as his shoulders rise and fall with his breathing. But he waits.
âDonât go,â you find yourself whimpering, ââM sorry. Come to bed, okay?â
He doesnât move and that makes your heart pound in your chest. You know heâs pissed, can see it in the way his fists stay clenched at his sides. His fingers twitch and he makes a move for the doorknob and you surge forward, wrapping yourself around his other arm, yanking him away from the door as hard as you can.Â
He lets your weight knock him off balance, lets you drag him away from the door. He lets you tug him down the hallway, sniffling and crying as you do.Â
âJ-JustâŠâ you find yourself frantically tugging his mask off, tossing it away before you rip the hem of his hoodie up. He doesnât help you or fight you as you try to take it off of him. He just stares blankly at you, like heâs assessing you. You hate it. âG-Get ready for bed, okay? JustâŠwe can go to sleep.â
âWhy do you make this so fuckinâ hard for me?â he finally breaks his silence, the question cold and calculating. Like heâs tired. Exhausted, âI keep tryinâ to make it up to you. But every time something goes wrong, you throw everything back in my face and you act like you hate me again. I canât keepâŠâ he trails off, shaking his head before he sits at the foot of the bed, hands clasped together and head hanging between his shoulders.
âI love you,â you blurt out, a sob breaking out of your lips as you do. Simon doesnât move. Your hands cover your eyes, as if being blind to his reaction will make the rejection hurt less, âI love you and i-it just keeps messing me up inside. Iâm sorry.â
âYou love me?â he asks, still no emotion in his voice.Â
When you peek at him, heâs in the same position as before, hands clasped, elbows on his knees, head bowed. You have no idea what expression heâs wearing and youâre scared to find out.
âYes,â you hiccup, sniffling softly, âIâm sorry.â
âWhy are you apologizing?â he asks softly, almost solemnly.
âI promised,â you cry, another choked sob escaping you.Â
âPromised..?â he doesnât sound cold anymore, just confused, âThe fuckâre you talkinâ about?â
âW-When I was 14,â you whimper, shame filling you as you recall your now-broken promise, âI-I told you I liked you and you said you didnât feel the same. You told me to never bring it up again and I promised I wouldnât. B-ButâŠâ you sobbed again, stopping yourself from finishing the sentence.
âFuckinâ hellâŠâ he breathes, bringing his hands to his face, scrubbing them up and down vigorously in a way that looks like it hurts. Then he laughs.Â
He fucking laughs.Â
Itâs like your worst fears come to light. Heâs laughing at you, at your confession. At your feelings. A fresh wave of tears fill your eyes and fall down your cheeks. You bite your lips to keep from making your sobs audible anymore. You didnât want him to laugh at that too. You hang your head, wringing your hands together behind your back anxiously as Simon quiets down.Â
âShit,â he breathes, getting to his feet. He stands before you, cupping your cheeks and forcing you to look at him. He frowns when he sees the utter despair on your face, the heartbreak in your eyes, âNo, baby. No, no. I wasnât laughinâ at you.â
Baby. You catch onto it. Heâs never called you that before.Â
You dash the spark of hope that it causes.Â
He rubs his thumbs under your eyes, wiping the tears away.Â
Then, he leans forward and slots his lips against yours.Â
Itâs like fireworks explode in your chest. Your heart races so fast that you feel lightheaded. You canât even respond to the kiss in time before he pulls away, your mind is moving too fast for you to process any meaningful thought. But he kissed you.Â
Simon kissed you.
âWhat?â you finally manage to whisper, looking up with wide, shocked eyes, âWhy did you..?â
He looks confused for a second, still cupping your cheeks as he looks into your watery eyes, âYou really have no idea?â Your brows furrow immediately and you shake your head, âHow I feel about you?â
âYou feel..?â you dumbly repeat.Â
He smiles softly, thumb rubbing softly over your cheekbone, âYou really think I donât feel the same?â
âB-But whenâŠwhen we were kids IâŠâ you stumble over your words, the truth youâve believed this entire time seemingly false, âYou s-said you didnât feel the same.â
âJesus, love,â he huffs softly in disbelief, âYou were fourteen. I was seventeen. You were way too fuckinâ young for me, it wouldnât have been right.â
âB-But thenâŠâ you stutter, reaching up to wipe your cheek, âWhen did you..?â
He shrugs, âNot sure exactly. Suppose sometime after you turned 20 was when I realized I felt somethinâ for you.â
âSo you reallyâŠâ you whisper, snagging your hands into his hoodie to pull him close, âYou reallyâŠI meanâŠâ
âLove you?â he smiles softly, âOf course I do.â
You lean forward and press your lips to his. He hums, wrapping one strong arm around your middle to pull you even closer. His lips work magically over yours, taking control of the kiss with ease. You easily melt into it, following his lead. Itâs not as easy as you thought it would be and you hope Simon doesnât notice.Â
But he does, of course he does.Â
He pulls away and smooths the palm of his hand down your cheek before it comes to rest on your jaw. His thumb slides over your bottom lip and he hums.
âYou ever kissed before?â he asks, voice calm and level with no teasing to it at all.
Still, heat explodes all over your face. Embarrassment overrides the euphoria of your requited feelings. You try to pull away but Simonâs much stronger and he wonât let go unless he wants to.Â
âHey, donât run,â he coos softly, turning your face to look back up at him, âI was just askinâ.â
âNo,â you mumble, still burning with embarrassment, âI-Iâve only ever liked you soâŠâ
âFuckinâ hellâŠâ he whispers, letting you step back just a bit so he can look over you, âIs that right?â
âYou should know that,â you mumble, feeling small under his scrutiny, âYou know everything about me.â
âDidnât think datinâ history was somethinâ you felt like sharinâ,â he shrugged off.
âWell, now you know,â you mutter, your gaze glued to the floor.
âThat I do,â he hums in agreement, reaching out to brush a hand down the length of your arm.Â
A soft, quietness falls over the two of you. Youâre not sure what to do and it seems heâs content where he is. Heâs watching you, tracking every little shift and fidget you make until he finally seems to take pity on you.
âLetâs get to bed,â he says softly, giving you a soft nudge towards the bed.Â
You take the opportunity to dive into bed, yanking the blanket over you as Simon strips himself out of his boots and hoodie. You go to look away as he yanks his belt free with practiced hands but you canât seem to. He slips the belt out of the loops and drops it on the dresser before unbuttoning his jeans and slipping them off.Â
Your mouth waters at the sight of him in a tight pair of navy boxer-briefs slung low on his hips. You can make out the shape of hisâ
âEnjoyinâ the view?â he mumbles half-heartedly as he turns to root through the dresser to find some sweatpants.Â
âSorryâŠâ you mutter shamefully at being caught.Â
He chuckles under his breath, pulling the sweats on before he rounds to his side of the bed and drops onto the mattress, âNothinâ to be sorry about.â
He leans over you and turns out the tableside lamp. Then he settles into his pillow with a soft sigh.
âSi..?â you whisper.
âYeah?â you can hear the smile in his voice.
âAre we umâŠâ you clear your throat, âI mean likeâŠare weâŠtogether now..?â
You feel him roll over and toss his arms around you. You squeak when he tugs you towards him roughly, securing you against his chest before he kisses the top of your head.
âDo you want to be together?â he asks, muffled by his lips pressed against you.Â
âYes,â you whisper quickly, wrapping yourself around him almost possessively.
He tilts your head up and carefully slots his mouth over yours again. You sigh happily at the feeling.Â
You notice that he keeps it a lot slower than he had before, moving his lips carefully against yours. Like heâs trying to make it easier for you to keep up. It makes your cheeks flush again but you sink into the pillow and let him kiss all he wants as you do your best to match his movements.Â
His body shifts, torso hovering over you as he rests his weight on his elbows on either side of your head. Your hands rest against his shoulders and simply get lost in the kiss.Â
After a moment, he deepens the kiss, sinking into you with his chest pressed against yours. You whimper and wrap your arms around his neck, carding your fingers through his cropped hair.Â
One of his hands moves, coming to grip your waist, fingers sliding up the hem of your shirt. Itâs like a dream come true. Literally.Â
All those nights you spent with your hand between your thighs, thinking of him. Thinking of him touching you like this â with his hand sliding your shirt up a little further every second. You even feel that familiar wetness soaking your panties.
Then why was your heart racing from anxiety instead of excitement? Why did you feel a fearful tremble setting in your thighs, as if your knees would be knocking together if you were standing. Why were you scared?
Before you can stop yourself, youâre shoving your hands against his chest with a weak, âNo!â
Simon is off of you in seconds but you can feel his gaze on you in the darkness. You struggle to catch your breath as you lay there, heart pounding in your ears. Your head hurts, you realize with a wince.
âUmâŠâ you find yourself attempting to appease him, âI-I donâtâŠIâm sorry, IâŠâ
âItâs alright,â he whispers sincerely, settling down into bed with a content hum, âNothinâ to worry about, love.â
You scoot closer to him and hesitantly place your head on his chest. Simonâs arm wraps around your back and tucks you even more snug against him. You close your eyes and will yourself to relax and sleep as you feel Simonâs comforting hand rubbing your back.Â
Neither of you talk about it in the morning. Or the day after that. Or the day after that. You donât bring it up, even though you want to, and Simon doesnât try touching you like that again. Part of you wants him to, youâve been dreaming about his touch for years but once you finally get it, you freak out?
You canât stop beating yourself up over it.Â
But then you think about the anxiety that it had caused. The apprehension. How uncomfortable it felt â how you wanted his hands off of you.Â
You sighed, flopping onto your side on the couch where you sat. Your mind was buzzing annoyingly from your thoughts.Â
Regardless of your problems, you were happier than ever with him. He was finally yours. Wholly and truly yours. It was bliss.Â
âGot a call,â Simon says, snapping you out of your daze, âGotta leave.â
That makes you sit up, âLeave?â
You finally notice that heâs got his bag packed â the one he only takes when heâs getting deployed. Youâre on your feet in seconds, following him to the door. Heâs wearing his skull balaclava so all you can see are his eyes â sad, apologetic.
âH-How long?â you ask, unable to ignore the ache in your chest as you watch him.
âFew weeks, probably,â he mutters, placing the bag down so he can tuck his feet into his boots.
He straightens up with a grunt before turning to you. He sighs, gloved hands cupping your cheeks when he sees how sad you look â like a kicked puppy. You wish you could feel his bare hands on you but canât find it in you to ask.Â
âI donât want you to go,â you find yourself mumbling.
Itâs selfish and even a bit cruel of you to voice that desire. Simonâs thumb strokes your cheek in that sweet way he always does and you melt into him. He lets you thump your head against his chest as you suppress your cries, biting your lip so you can keep your tears at bay.Â
âI know,â he softly whispers, stroking your back as you cling to him, âI know, but I have to.â
âI know,â you mumble, finally looking up at him. You know your eyes are glassy and you make sure to blink back the tears so they never overflow, âJust be safe and come home, okay?â
He lifts his mask up just enough to expose his lips before he leans down to kiss you. Itâs a whole body experience this time. He clutches you against him like his life depends on it, gloved hands fiercely gripping the back of your t-shirt. His lips move smoothly against yours, hand coming up to cup your jaw so he can tilt your head and pull you even deeper into his kiss. He pulls away when he needs to breathe, smiling when he sees the dazed, lovesick expression on your face. He tugs his mask down and lets you go but you stay as close to him as possible.Â
âMake sure you stay warm,â he coos, âGonna start gettinâ real cold in a couple days.â
âI will, Si,â you assure him.
âLeft some cash for you to do your shoppinâ,â he adds, âI know youâre a shit cook but I left a list of some easy recipes. Donât burn the flat down.â
You snort and playfully smack his shoulder, âIâll just buy some cup noodles in that case.â
He rolls his eyes, pinching your side to make you gasp from the ticklish feeling, âDonât even think about it.â
Your grin falters when his phone makes that obnoxious beeping noise that lets you know itâs something urgent. He sighs, the tranquil happiness between you two broken immediately. He kisses your forehead through his mask and pulls the front door open.
âKeep this locked,â he mutters, stepping past the threshold, âIâll be home soon.â
He closes the door and youâre left with an emptiness that overcomes you. Youâve always been scared for him when he has to go off on missions â you know that his job is extremely dangerous and he could lose his life at any moment. That thought alone makes a nauseous pit settle in your stomach. You push down the feeling of bile rising in the back of your throat and click the lock on the door with a sigh before you go about your day, trying your best to keep your mind off of him and where he might be in the world.Â
True to his word, however, the temperature drops bitterly cold within 2 days after he leaves. There had already been a chill in the air that drove you to turn the heating on just a bit but now it was full blast. But now, it was dipping to freezing and you were anticipating the arrival of snow soon enough as well.Â
You wake up one morning, however, and your apartment is bitterly cold. You sit up, confused before climbing out of bed. Your feet are immediately freezing as you step onto the floor. You hiss, wrapping your arms around yourself as you stumble over to the radiator in your room. You touch it and find absolutely no heat emanating from it.Â
All the radiators are the same. Absolutely no heat.Â
You curse, realizing you have no idea what youâre supposed to do. You curl up on the couch under a heavy throw blanket as you type with bitterly cold fingers into Google, looking for anything that can help you. But itâs to no avail. You canât understand a thing.Â
Your next thought is to call the building manager but you know thatâs pointless. The useless man never actually helps with any work for his tenants.Â
Thereâs no way in hell that you can afford to call someone to come and fix the problem. You have money for groceries but if you spent that you wouldnât have anything to eat. You sigh, resolving yourself to bundling up and trying to stay as warm as you can.Â
You pile all the blankets you have into bed and pick out only your thickest, warmest sweaters.Â
This is going to be miserable, you think.Â
The snow comes just a short week later and it feels even colder. You venture out of your flat to go to the grocery store, picking up ingredients for the dishes Simon wrote down for you and also some cans of soup that you can cook to stay warm. You also throw some boxes of tea and some hot chocolate in with it, figuring why not. Warm drinks will help.Â
Itâs almost 3 weeks of living like that. Itâs miserable and makes your bones ache from how stiff the cold makes you feel. You make sure to eat nice, hot food to keep yourself warm and make frequent cups of warm drinks so you can keep your hands warm for as long as you can. You do your best.Â
The worst is showers, though. When youâre standing under the blisteringly hot spray, itâs bliss. But the second you step out and your wet body is hit with the freezing air, you couldnât have felt more miserable.Â
The night Simon walks through the door, he finds you bundled up on the couch sipping a cup of hot chocolate.Â
âSimon!â you gasp excitedly, tossing the blankets off to take a running leap at him.Â
He huffs contentedly when he catches you in his arms, letting you embrace him for as long as you need. He strips his mask off and brings you in for a delicate kiss.
âLet me wash up,â he mumbles, stalking through the apartment.
âUm, before you do, Si,â you catch him at the entrance to the hallway. He turns to you and looks at you with a brow raised, âThe umâŠheating is broken soâŠjust letting you know when you come out of the shower itâs gonna suck.â
âAinât nothinâ I havenât dealt with before,â he mutters and pauses, âThe fuck you mean itâs broken?â
âHeating cut off a few weeks agoâŠâ you shrug, wrapping your arms around yourself as you start to feel the cold creep in again.
âA few weeks ago?â he hisses, running a stressed hand through his hair, âFuckinâ hell. You didnât call someone to fix it?â
You pout as he raises his voice, clearly frustrated, âI couldnât afford it, Si! I had the money you gave me for food but I wasnât gonna spend that to get the heating fixed. You know the building manager is a piece of shit, not like he was gonna call someone.â
He sighs, crossing his arms over his chest, seemingly thinking something over. Then he turns on his heel and storms into the bathroom, slamming the door.
âIâm sorry, Simon!â you call through the door, âI didnât know what else to do! Please, donât be mad.â
The shower turns on and all you can do is look up and sigh in exasperation. The second heâs home and heâs already pissed at you.Â
You sulk over to the couch and flop down, tossing your blankets over you as you grab your mug. The hot chocolate is still warm but not as hot as it was. Itâll have to do.
Simon comes out of the shower, gets dressed warmly, and joins you in the living room. He doesnât even look at you as he makes a move for his bag that he left by the door. You almost think heâs going to scoop the bag up and storm out the door. You sit up, ready to stop him but instead, he stoops down and zips it open. He pulls out his wallet and approaches you.Â
âWhat are you doing?â you mumble, watching him flip the thing open.
Itâs old and worn, a simple black leather wallet. Heâs had it for as long as you could remember and youâve put the poor thing through the washer and dryer so many times that youâre shocked it's still intact.Â
He pulls out a bank card and promptly hands it to you. Your brain stutters to a stop as you look at it.
âTake it, fuck sake,â he mutters. He sounds annoyed but the way he looks away and his ears turn pink you can tell heâsâŠshy.Â
Simon Riley is fucking shy right now.
You take the bank card out of his hand and look at it, flipping over in your hands, âWhy are you giving this to me?â
âSo you can use it,â he mumbles, slamming his wallet shut and tossing it onto the table, âThat way, in case anything happens you can withdraw from my account for what you need. If an emergency happens and Iâm not around, use it.â
âSimonâŠâ you mumble, looking up at him, âAre you sure..?â
âCourse Iâm sure,â he scoffs, taking a seat beside you before softly rattling off four digits.
âHuh?â you dumbly ask.
âItâs my pin,â he responds, grabbing one of the blankets you have piled on the couch and tossing it on his lap.
âThatâs my birthdayâŠâ you say softly as you repeat the numbers over and over in your head, âYour bank pin is my birthday?â
He snatches the remote up from the table and turns the TV on without another word. But you can see how pink the tips of his ears are. It makes you beam and before you know it, youâre curling snugly into his side.Â
âLove you, Si,â you whisper, earning a kiss to the top of your head in response.
Simon calls the next morning to have someone come by and fix the damn heating. You listen to the man rattle off some information to Simon about what the problem was but it makes virtually no sense to you so you resolve yourself to sitting on the couch and waiting until itâs warm again.Â
But even when itâs nice and toasty inside, you still plaster yourself to Simonâs side, snuggling as close to him as you possibly can.
âI want you to meet my team,â Simon says one morning while heâs making some eggs.Â
Youâre standing by the toaster, waiting for it to pop up but his words make you turn to him, âYou mean 141?â
âWho else?â he huffs, flipping one of the eggs. It sizzles loudly in the pan, âThey wanted me to go out with them tonight. Thought you could join us.â
âReally?â you realize how incredulous you sound and then try again, âI mean really? Thatâs okay with you?â
He nods, plating the eggs, âI think itâs time they met you.â
âI-Iâd love to,â you say, unable to hide the excitement you feel.Â
You catch a slip of a smile on Simonâs face before the toast pops up and distracts you.Â
You have to dig into your closet that evening, after a shower, to find something nice to wear. You figure an occasion like this calls for something a little nicer than just jeans and a t-shirt like you usually wear. But you canât find much of anything.Â
âWhatâre you huffinâ about in here?â Simon asks when he walks in, towel wrapped around his waist. Heâs still dripping wet from the shower and you can feel the way your mouth fills with saliva at the sight.Â
âI uhâŠdonât know what to wearâŠâ you respond, turning your back to him just as he slips the towel off. Your cheeks feel like theyâre on fire, imagining Simon completely naked behind you.
âWear those nice jeans you got,â he mumbles, grunting as he gets himself dressed, âAnd that little blue top you got.â
âThe cropped one?â you ask incredulously, a brow raised as you turn to him. Heâs got some jeans on now and heâs meticulously unfolding a black t-shirt so he can put it on, âI havenât worn that in a while, howâd you even remember it?â
He shrugs, the muscles in his back rippling with his movement before he tosses the shirt over his head and pulls it down, covering his skin once again, âItâs cute. Weâre just goinâ to the pub, love.â
âOkay,â you mumble, reaching into the back of your closet to pull the little shirt out, âIf youâre sure this will be okay.â
âIâm sure,â he chuckles softly, grabbing his balaclava off the dresser. But he doesnât put it on yet. Instead, he sits on the bed and watches you change.
Youâre acutely aware of his eyes on you as you strip your shirt off. You keep your back to him, trying to ignore your racing heart. You donât feel uncomfortable at all, instead you feelâŠexcited.Â
Your mind runs wild, imagining him stepping up behind you, kissing your neck and cupping your bare breasts in his big hands. Theyâre a little rough from his line of work and you wonder what theyâd feel like against the sensitive skin of your tits, thumbing your nipples and pinching them a little meanly.Â
âC-Can you hand me a bra?â you find yourself asking.
He grunts in acknowledgement and the bed creaks when his weight moves off it. He opens one of the drawers and is behind you in a second. His body heat permeates through his shirt as he presses his chest against your back.Â
He slings your bra over your shoulder, holding it with one finger by the strap. You canât help but tilt your head back to look up at him. Heâs towering over you, pretty, brown eyes looking down his nose at you.Â
You realize in this position, he could clearly see your breasts but he keeps his eyes on yours. You take the bra from him and he lets you, simply staring into your eyes with that stern silence he has about him.
âT-ThanksâŠâ you find yourself whispering, mouth feeling particularly dry.
He grunts, lips quirked up just a bit before he turns his back and walks back to the bed. You let out a quiet, slow breath, willing your heart rate to go back to normal.
Simon was so exhilarating. Just being around him sets your heart racing and fingers trembling.Â
You put your bra on and slip your top over your head, ignoring the sticky feeling in your panties as you do.Â
âI donât know, Si,â you mutter, turning to face him, âI-Itâs a little tight on me now.â
The fabric once hugged you nicely but now it was snug. It molded around your breasts, even showing the lines of your bra. The neckline was low, giving a good show of cleavage â it didnât help that Simon picked one of your more well padded bras.Â
Simon looks up, his eyes immediately falling to your breasts. He sucks in a quick breath and looks away, licking his lips.
âLooks fine,â he mutters, standing to pull one of the drawers open again. He searches for a second, brows furrowed until he pulls out the jeans he was talking about. The ânice jeansâ as he called them, were just some low rise jeans youâd only worn about 4 times.
You look dumbly at them as he drops them into your hands.
âThese?â you scoff, âSimon, I canâtââ
He quiets you with a kiss to your forehead, âTrust me, love.â
He steps out of the room after that, leaving you to your own devices. Youâre thankful that you can change your panties without him seeing how saturated and sticky theyâve become because of him. You bury them in the laundry basket and remind yourself that you should do the laundry before he does because youâd be mortified if he found them.Â
You donât even look at yourself in the mirror, afraid youâll feel too self-conscious if you see what you look like. But you trust Simonâs judgment on what he thinks would look good on you â and you canât deny that dressing up how he likes feels nice.Â
You step into the living room, intent on pulling your shoes on when Simon catches you with an arm around your waist. You gasp as he turns you to face him.
âYou look lovely,â he whispers, smoothing his hands up your sides, thumbs slipping under the hem of your shirt to stroke your skin.
You swallow thickly as your heart starts racing in your chest again. He leans down and pecks your lips but pulls back before you have the chance to kiss back.Â
âLetâs go,â is all he adds before walking away, leaving you no choice but to follow like the lovesick puppy you are.Â
Walking into the bar, your heart pounds painfully in your chest from pure anxiety. Your hand is clasped tightly in Simonâs as he easily moves through the crowd. You suppose his height makes it easy to see over people.Â
âYou alright?â he asks, leaning down to whisper in your ear.
âHavenât been in a bar since I worked atâŠâ you trail off, giving him a half-hearted shrug.
âIf you wanna leave, just say the word,â he mutters, giving your hand a squeeze.
âN-No,â you shake your head, shooting him a wobbly smile,âI wanna meet your team at least.â
He smiles reassuringly and gives your hand a tug to encourage you to follow him. He leads you right to a table situated in a corner, three men laughing and drinking.Â
âThere he is!â the one with the mohawk cheeks, holding up his pint in celebration.
âShut up, Soap,â Simon grumbles petulantly as he pulls out a chair for you.
Soap, you note to yourself. You know them by name but youâve never actually seen the faces to put to them. Soap looks like you imagined, a broad grin and pretty, bright eyes â you imagined them green but theyâre blue.Â
âAnd who is this lovely companion of yours, Simon?â an older man with a hat and mutton chops asks with a kind smile, eyes on you.
Simon says your name before he sits down with a grunt beside you.
âPrice,â your boyfriend supplies when you look curiously at him.
The man in question holds out a hand which you take and softly shake, âNice to meet you.â
âHad no idea Lt. had someone waitinâ for him at home,â Soap says, a teasing lilt in his voice.Â
So youâve met Soap, Price, and that leaves; your eyes land on the quiet guy sitting back in his chair, a cool smile on his lips. He meets your gaze and his smile broadens â not teasing like Soapâs but purely kind.
âYou can call me Kyle,â he gives you a polite nod.
âGaz, then?â you question, tilting your head to the side. Kyle looks surprised, eyes flicking to Simon who shifts uncomfortably in his chair, âHeâs talked about all of you before. I only know your call signs though.â
âJohn will do fine if youâd like,â Price says, tipping his beer back to take a chug.
âSimon calls me Johnny,â Soap adds, âYouâre welcome to as well. Anyone important to the Lieutenant is important to us.â
Out of the corner of your eye you see Simon roll his eyes. It makes you smile. He leans over, nudging you with his knee, âYou want anything to drink? I need one.â
âNo thank you, Si,â you reply, intent on having a clear head for the night. Youâve never been much of a drinker anyway.Â
When Simonâs gone from the table, you suddenly feel incredibly out of place. Price and Kyle have the decency to not stare you down but Soap seems keen on keeping his baby blueâs right on you and a goofy little smile on his face.
âUmâŠâ you shift uncomfortably as you look back at him.
âWeâve never gotten to meet anyone from Ghostâs private life before,â Soap says, saving you from having to think of what to say, âJust shocked sâall.âÂ
âYouâre gonna start giving the poor thing the creeps with your ugly mug,â Kyle chuckles which also makes Soap laugh.
âSorry about that,â Soap lifts his glass and cheers to you before tipping it back.Â
He grimaces slightly as it goes down before slamming his glass back on the table.
âItâs alright,â you respond, âSiâs not really the open book kind. So I understand.â
âHow long have the two of you known each other?â Kyle asks.
You find yourself wondering where the hell Simon even is but answer regardless, âSince we were kids. Um, we lived next door. His mom and mine were friends, I guess.â
Soap nods his head, elbows on the table as he gives you his full attention, âYou guess?â
You hum, âIâm 3 years younger than Simon. The way it was told to me by my mom is thatâŠhis mom came over and,â you couldnât fight back the smile as you recalled the story.
âOh this has got to be good,â Soap nudged Kyle excitedly at your grin.
âTold my mom that Simon didnât have any friends and that he was aâŠsoft-hearted boy and she wanted him to have some friends,â you giggle, holding a hand in front of your face to hide your laughter, âSo she wanted to set up playdates with me even though I was still a baby. My mom didnât have the heart to tell her no.â
Soap tosses his head back and laughs, âNo fuckinâ way.â
âIâm shocked to say it but that actually makes him sound cute,â Kyle adds, unable to hide the laughter in his voice either.
âDonât let him hear you say that,â Price says, but thereâs a smile on his face, âSimonâll knock you out cold on this table.â
âSo you and Simon have been together since?â Kyle asks, glass cupped in both hands.
You nod, âOnly time weâve been apart is when he enlisted and had to go off for a few years to train.â
Soap opens his mouth to say something but a large figure finally drops down into the seat next to you. Simon has a glass of bourbon and a glass that he slides over to Soap who catches it with ease.
âThanks, Lt,â he nods, taking a sip before making that disgusted face again.
âWhat are you lot talkinâ about?â Simon asks, drumming his fingers against his glass.
âWe were discussinâ all your dirty secrets,â Kyle teases with a charming grin.
âNothinâ too damning I hope,â Simon huffs before he takes a large gulp of his drink.Â
The other three men all hide their grins behind their glasses.Â
The anxiety you had felt at the beginning of the night is long gone. The task force is full of jokes and laughs and even Simon seems like a different person.Â
With you, heâs kind and even soft. Heâs by no means gentle or patient.Â
But this side of Simon is so jovial and comfortable that it warms your heart to see. He drinks a few glasses and by the end of the night, heâs got a relaxed, lidded look in his eyes that lets you know heâs got a bit of a buzz going on.Â
âIt was lovely to meet you,â Price says when you all walk out of the bar.
âI really enjoyed meeting all of you as well,â you smile, letting Simon tuck you into his side with an arm wrapped around your waist.
âGet him home safe,â Soap teases, your smile only widening when you hear Simon huff in annoyance.Â
You bid goodbye to the three of them and make your way to the car with Simon, plucking his keys out of his hand and forcing him into the passenger seat despite his grumbled protests of how âheâs not that drunkâ.
When the two of you finally get into your apartment, you let him lock up and turn out the lights while you go to the bedroom and get ready for bed.Â
âYou looked really nice tonight,â Simon mutters when he finally walks in as you crawl into bed, âIâm glad you liked them.â
âIâm glad they liked me,â you huff, leaning back into the pillows, âThey were all really nice guys.â
âYeah,â Simon hums, tugging his shirt off of his head, taking his mask with it, âTheyâre good people.â
You nod your head and tuck your knees to your chest while he gets undressed. He slips on a plaid pair of pajama pants and shoves the drawer closed with his hip before yanking the blanket back to make room for his large body.Â
You bounce a little on the bed when he drops his weight onto it. He smacks his pillow a couple times before he lays back and sighs. Itâs clear heâs still a little buzzed from the way he fights to keep his eyes open.
âSimon?â you ask, turning to face him.Â
That makes his eyes open back up before he looks at you, âWhat?â
âCan I kiss you?â you ask.Â
He snorts and it makes you smile. He reaches out and wraps his hand around the back of your head. You let him tug you down, pressing your hands against his firm chest as you kiss him.Â
His hand travels down your back as he sighs into your mouth. You pull away briefly to look into his eyes before you kiss him again, this time deepening it as much as youâre able. Simon sighs contentedly, his other hand coming up to caress your arm.Â
âI like kissinâ youâŠâ you find yourself whispering against his lips.
He groans at that, the sound going straight to your core. You feel yourself clench around nothing, already starting to leak into your panties.Â
âYeah?â he coos, cupping your cheek, thumbing over your lips, âYou can kiss me all you want, love.â
You whimper, surging down to kiss him again. His hands grip your waist, intermittently squeezing you, like he doesnât know what to do with his hands.Â
Suddenly, you feel the warm, slick slide of his tongue against your lips. You whimper and pull back, brows furrowed.
âShh, love,â he coos, pulling you close again, âJusâ relax and let meâŠâ
You huff, struggling to catch your breath as he urges you to meet his lips again. You feel his tongue again and eagerly open your mouth, letting him taste the inside of your mouth. You shyly meet his tongue with yours and feel his grip on your waist tighten as he groans in his throat.Â
Youâre sure youâve soaked well through your panties by now. Thereâs an ache in your clit that you long to reach down and relieve â or better yet, have Simon relieve.Â
You bet his fingers would feel so damn good against you. You find yourself whimpering into the kiss at the thought alone. Simon lets out a husky laugh into your mouth before pulling away.Â
A string of spit connects your lips before it breaks and vanishes.Â
With a surge of confidence, you toss your leg over his waist. He grunts when your weight settles on his hips, on his cock. Itâs chubbed up against his thigh from kissing you and he knows you can feel it.Â
âWhatâre you doinâ, baby?â he huffs, unable to stop his hands from traveling up the front of your body.Â
You grab his wrist and boldly slide it under the hem of your shirt. He bites his lip to keep from moaning when he feels your bare breast fill his palm. You see the way his eyes start to roll back before he looks at you again. It makes you throb in your panties and you canât resist grinding against him a little before he grabs your waist and stops you.
âSiâŠâ you whimper, pressing your hands against his chest, ââS wrong?â
âCanât,â he clears his throat and sinks into the bed, âCanât do this, love.â
âWhy not?â you ask, feeling a pit of disappointment in your gut, âYou donât want to? I just thoughtâŠâ
You feel your face burn with humiliation as you slide off of his lap. Simon lets you, simply laying there on his back, eyes closed and a knit between his brows, as he evens his breathing out. You fight back tears as you sit there, biting the inside of your lip anxiously.Â
âNotâŠnot tonight, sweetheart,â he finally says, reaching over to pet your hair, âBeen drinkinâ ând I want to be sober for it, yeah?â
It would have been a solid excuse if it didnât sound so flimsy coming from his lips. Like he doesnât even believe it himself.Â
âYeahâŠâ you offer, giving him a wobbly smile before turning out the light.Â
Youâre too embarrassed to cuddle into him that night.Â
âCan I ask you something?â you find yourself muttering as you relax on the couch with him, watching some old movie he picked out, âAs long as you promise not to get mad.â
He snorts, taking a sip of his tea, âWonât get mad.â
âI just want to knowâŠâ you clear your throat and sit up straight a little more, going over the question in your head, âWhy did you leave that nightâŠleave like that, just to have sex?â
He tenses up immediately, you can feel it. He shifts where he sits, spreading his legs just a little wider so he can sink deeper into the couch, âWe already talked about this.â
You wince at his clipped tone, knowing youâre stepping into dangerous territory, âI know butâŠI want to know the real reason.â
He catches his bottom lip between his teeth and sighs, keeping his eyes trained on the TV, âYou think I was lyinâ to you?â
Now he sounds mad. You quickly shake your head, âNo, Si. I-Iâm not trying to start a fight, I swear. I donât think you were lying. I just think youâŠwerenât telling me everything.â
He sighs. You can see the way his jaw ticks when he clenches it, âIs that right?â
âYeah,â you breathe, scooting a little closer to him, placing your hands on his chest, smoothing his shirt down a bit, âIt was justâŠout of character for you, Si. I was really upset and you knew that. It wasnât like you to justâŠleave. Just to get laid.â
He finally looks at you, just out of the corner of his eye. You meet the look, offering him an encouraging smile to show that youâre not upset or anything.Â
âAll night,â he finally mutters, âYouâd been kickinâ in your sleep. Kept wakinâ me up.â
You nodded, a look of confusion on your face. You had no idea where this was going.
âYou started sayinâ my name,'' he continued, âMoaninâ my name. Fuck, it was drivinâ me crazy.â
Your face flushes hot when you hear that. It all suddenly comes rushing back to you â what youâd been dreaming about.Â
âYou threw your leg over mine and I couldââ he cuts himself off, his throat moving with how hard he swallows.
âCould what?â your voice comes out shockingly breathy.Â
He catches it, looking at you. You can see the way his pupils widen immediately when he meets your gaze. Itâs like he can see right through you, see the fact youâre dripping into your panties again. Just from this conversation alone.Â
âI could feel how fuckinâ wet you were,â he brings a shaky hand up and runs it through his hair before he leans forward, resting his elbows on his knees, âCouldnât fuckinâ deal with it. I had toâŠlet it out somehow.â
âSo you knew that I wanted youâŠlike that?â you find yourself asking.
He scoffs and shakes his head, âDidnât think about it like that. Figured it was just a dream and thatâs all it was.â
âWasnât just a dream,â you assure, scooting closer to him.
Simonâs breath catches in his throat when you lean over him, resting your hand on the arm rest on his other side, letting it support your weight. You stand on your knees, making you just a little taller than him before you lean down and kiss him.Â
He remains completely still, like heâs processing. His hands flounder in the air for a second before heâs carefully pushing you to sit back down. You slump against your heels and look at him, perturbed.
âWhy..?â
âI need to make dinner,â he says lamely.Â
âSimonâŠâ you admonish, knowing heâs lying.Â
He gets up, knees cracking as he does. He winces a little bit before he bends down to pick up the blanket that fell to the floor when he stood. You kept your eyes on him, worrying your bottom lip between your teeth. You almost let him go but before you can stop him, you grab his arm.Â
âI donât know what Iâm doing, Simon,â you mutter, âI keep trying to make things go further with you but I just keep making a fool of myself and Iââ
ââS not you,â he assures softly, taking your hand in his, ââS all me, baby.â
âSo whyâŠâ you frown, âI want you.â
He shakes his head, âNight you told me how you felt. You sounded scared.âÂ
You remember, the way his touch had made anxiety fill you. You had wanted him, of course, but for some reason it had just been so damn awful at the same time. You hadnât really dwelled on why that was.Â
âIt wasnât âcause of you, Si,â you assured, shifting so your feet were on the floor rather than under you, âI promise. I-I was just nervous, I think. Thatâs all.â
âI donât wantâŠâ he licks his lips, seemingly thinking over his next words carefully before he says them slowly, âI donât to hear you sound like that with me again. âS why Iâve been avoidinâ it. âCause I donât want you to get scared again.â
You shake your head, rising to your feet, stepping in front of him. You take his hands in yours and squeeze them, âI donât want to make a fool of myself with you, Simon.â
He frowns, âYou know I would never think poorly of you.â
You smile and shrug, âI know that. I thinkâŠthat time was justâŠtoo soon. After that night at the bar and everything that happened. And then the fact Iâm so inexperienced that itâs laughable. I thinkâŠI just wasnât ready for it. I needed to go at my own pace and I have been.â
âI donât want you to push yourself,â he hums, âI know that night at the bar was terrifying,â he brings a hand up to brush over your cheek, âI understand if youâre not goinâ to be ready for a long time. Itâs normal to not be ready after what happened to you.â
You huff, âIâve been trying to show you that Iâve been ready for a while now, Si. I was anxious at first, yes. But now itâsâŠlike a good kind of nervous.â
âA good kind of nervous?â he mutters, hands moving to your hips to pull you closer. Your breath hitches in your throat and you nod dumbly, âTell me all about it.â
âL-Like my heart races,â you breathe, âAnd I feel scared that Iâm gonna do something silly and embarrassing but like I want to learn andâŠand I want to do good for you.â
âFuck,â Simon groans, dropping his head to rest on your shoulder, âCanât say shit like that to a man like me, love.â
âWhy not?â you whimper, feeling your knees tremble in excitement when you feel his hands start to wander.
ââCauseâŠâ he whispers, running his hands up your sides, âMakes me think some nasty shit, sweetheart.â
You swallow thickly at the promise in his voice, âSimonâŠâÂ
You sound so wrecked already and it makes him moan softly in your ear, âTell me about it, baby.â
Just like that, youâre spilling your guts to him, âGet so wet for you, Si, all the time. I want you so bad that it hurts.â
âYeah?â he breathes, finally pulling his head from where he was hiding in your shoulder, tilting your chin up, âWhereâs it hurt, baby? Hm? Right in that needy little cunt?â
You whimper immediately, looking up at him with wide, hazy eyes and nod, âT-Tried to touch myself. Thinkinâ about you made it hurt so I couldnât help myself. Thought about you when I did.â
He hums as you babble to him but his mind latches onto one particular word, âTried, baby? What do you mean "tried?â
Your cheeks burn hot at the slip up. Would he think you were silly for it?
âC-Canât do it right,â you confess softly, hoping he doesnât see how embarrassed you are, âTry so hard but n-nothinâ ever happens.â
Simon moans at that. Loud and unbridled, âWhatâre you sayinâ, baby? That you canât make yourself cum, sâthat it?â You shake your head bashfully, âFuckinâ hell. Thatâs adorable.â
âD-Donât tease me, Si,â you whimper but the seat of your panties is so fucking wet that itâs sticking to you.Â
He hums, a predatory smile spreads across his face, âAm I beinâ mean, love?â You nod your head, tearfully staring up at him. It only makes his smile widen, canines popping out, ââM sorry. Canât help myself when you tell me âbout how you touch your pretty little pussy and just canât make yourself cum like you need. Think I can do it for you, hm? Want me to try and make you cum?â
You vigorously nod your head, uncaring how fucking needy you look to him. Heâs offering to give you what youâve wanted for years â to give you a real, honest to God orgasm. And you werenât going to let this chance slip away.Â
âWant you on the bed,â he suddenly whispers, âOn your back, lose the pants but keep everything else on.â
With a jerk of his head in the direction of the bedroom, you take off. You hear him chuckle behind you at your excitement. He makes sure the door is locked before he heads back to the bedroom.Â
Youâre there just like he asked, pants pooled on the floor, leaving you in nothing but an old t-shirt of his and a pair of the cutest little lilac colored panties heâs seen. Youâve got your knees pinned together, clenching your thighs but laying perfectly still in waiting for him.Â
âSo fuckinâ good for me,â he praises, grinning when you whimper and tremble at his words, âOh, sweet thing likes to be praised, huh?â
You nod your head, âWanna be good for you, Si.â
âThatâs sweet, baby,â he coos, reaching to the back of his collar so he can tug his shirt off of his head.Â
Your heart hammers away in your chest when he crawls onto the bed, hands on either side of your head. He looks so big like this, on top of you, completely blocking any view you had of your ceiling and instead filling your viewline with just him. He leans down and kisses you, humming contentedly when you eagerly kiss back. Your hands find purchase on his shoulders as he uses one hand to tug your legs open so he can slot himself between them.Â
You cry out when he presses himself against your core. Heâs wearing nothing but his jeans but you can feel the heat radiating through the thick material.Â
âShit, look at that,â he whispers, leaning back on his heels to admire the nice little wet patch that has stained your panties, âYou already this wet, baby?â
âKissinâ you always makes me this wet, Si,â you sweetly confess and oh, you are just so precious.Â
His hands slide up your stomach, moving your t-shirt up and up until it sits crumpled under your chin. Your tits are bare and move with every gasping breath that you take.Â
Simonâs hands are just as rough and warm as youâd expect them to be. His thumbs come up and glide over your nipples until they harden into stiff little peaks for him.Â
Then his mouth is wrapping around one, swirling his tongue around it before pulling off with a lewd pop. His hand pinches the other nipple, rolling it between his fingers as he listens to you whimper and sigh.Â
âPlease, Si,â you whine, âI-It hurts, please.â
âIt hurts?â he hums, leaving a fleeting kiss against the nipple his tongue was torturing just a moment ago, âWhere? Hm?â
His hand travels down your body, cupping your cunt through your panties. You gasp, arching your hips just a bit to grind against his palm. He lets you, before he meanly pins your hips down with his other hand.Â
âWhere, love?â he smooths the pad of his thumb over the seam of your cunt through your panties. The fabric is saturated with your slick, letting him see every part of you through shape alone. His thumb finds your clit, the little bud poking out through the fabric from how hard and swollen it's become, âHere? âS it your pretty clit that hurts, love?â
You nod, eyes rolling back in your head when he presses his thumb against the bud, trapping it under his finger so he can roll mean little circles over it. Youâd be mindlessly rutting your hips by now if he didnât have his other arm slung over your hips to keep you pinned nice and still like he wants.Â
It already feels so different than when you touched yourself. Maybe because itâs him or maybe because heâs so experienced.Â
That thought makes you equal parts jealous and equal parts turned on. Heâd slept with plenty of people but now he was using that expertise to make you feel good.Â
âCan you take them off, please?â you whine, pitchy and sweet from arousal.Â
âAsked so sweetly for me,â he coos, hitching his thumbs into the band of your panties before giving them a firm tug.Â
You quickly lift your hips, letting him tug them down and off of your feet. You expect him to toss them away but instead he holds them up, thumbing over the slickness in the crotch. You watch him with wide eyes as he analyzes it. Your breath hitches when he suddenly brings them towards his face and licks a wide stripe of the fabric, moaning when he gets a good laste of your syrupy sweet slick.
âSimon!â you gasp â admonish, leaning up to snatch them out of his grasp.Â
His eyes open, he hadnât even realized heâd closed them, to look at you. He licks his lips like a dog licking its chops when it tastes something real delicious.Â
He doesnât even comment on what he just did or the pure embarrassment that is written all over your face. Instead, he grips underneath your knees and yanks you down the bed towards him so your hips are situated in his lap.Â
âJusâ let me touch you, love,â he whispers, âIâll work a nice little orgasm out of you in no time, yeah?â
You nod your head because you trust him. You know heâs going to be able to give you what you need so badly. You donât even question it â especially when you feel how good it feels when he uses his thumbs to spread your folds open for him. He groans when he sees the sticky strings of slick that display just how turned on you are.Â
Pretty little hole clenching sporadically around nothing, dribbling more creamy arousal that makes his tongue feel like lead in his mouth. A pretty clit that twitches and throbs under his scrutinizing gaze. But you make no move to cover yourself and hide from his gaze.Â
He finally touches the bud directly and itâs like electricity strikes through you. You lose control of your body as your back arches and your thighs violently twitch. Your cheeks burn when you hear him chuckle softly at your reaction.
âSensitive,â he huffs, a crooked little grin on his face as he brushes his thumb over your clit again, garnering the same reaction as before from you, âFuck, canât believe youâre this sensitive and canât make yourself cum.â
ââS cause itâs you, Si,â you sweetly confess.
And itâs true. Having him touch you like this directly â feeling his callused skin over the most sensitive little part of you is euphoric. It doesnât feel anything like when you touch yourself at all. It feels magnified, you feel like a live wire and everything feels like too much. But you donât do anything to impede him because you trust him more than anything â especially like this, with your body.Â
He replaced his thumb with his middle finger, prodding at your entrance. You almost think heâs going to press inside you but he doesnât â instead, he gathers your slick up on his finger and drags it up to your clit. He softly circles the bud, cock kicking against his thigh when you sigh and croon so sweetly for him.Â
Your cunt makes sticky noises as he continues doing this, gathering your arousal and lathering your precious bud up with it so he can so softly play with it. His touches arenât enough to actually work you to the edge, itâs much too slow and soft but it feels good. He waits for you to relax against the bed, lashes fluttering as you whimper and twitch on the bed for him.
âThere you go, sweetheart,â he whispers, leaning forward to press a kiss against your trembling thigh, âRelax fâme. Want you nice and soft for me so I can get my fingers in this tight little cunt.â
You gasp at that, partly in excitement and also in apprehension. Youâve never actually put anything inside yourself before â except once, you put your finger in and it burned so you never tried it again.Â
âD-DontâŠâ you find yourself muttering, making him freeze. He thinks youâve changed your mind, anxiety getting the better of you and heâs fully prepared to propel himself away from you at a moment's notice, âBe gentle, okay?â
His gaze softens when he looks at you, âWonât hurt you, love. I promise.â
You remain relaxed for him when he carefully prods you with his middle finger. He keeps his thumb pressed against your clit, not rubbing it or anything, just keeping a nice pressure that keeps you sagged against the pillows.Â
It doesnât feel anything like when you tried that one time with yourself. Everything is so much wetter and more pliant. Itâs like your walls just suck the digit in, even though itâs so much bigger than your own finger.Â
You sigh softly when you finally have something to clench around. Simon gives you a sweet kiss to the spot right underneath your belly button in silent praise. He keeps his lidded, brown eyes on your face, watching every little expression you make with rapt attention.Â
He slowly and carefully fucks his middle finger into you, feeling the way you slowly relax around him, soaking his skin with your arousal. He smooths his free hand up the length of your body, abandoning your clit to wrap his palm around your breast. You place your own hand over his, encouraging him to squeeze harder.Â
âHowâs that feel, love?â he asks, still sliding his finger in and out of you.
âOkayâŠâ you reply, keeping your hand over his on your chest, âBut itâŠumâŠâ
âWhat?â he urges, âTell me what you feel.â
âI-It feels nice butâŠâ you trail off and he hums, nodding his head.
âDoesnât feel good?â he finishes for you. You nod your head and he laughs softly, âI know, baby. Jusâ tryinâ to get you used to the feeling and then Iâll make it feel real good, alright?â
âOkay,â you whisper but he can tell youâre not too convinced that itâs going to feel much better.
Youâre worried that the same thing is going to happen â itâll feel really good and then youâre never going to be able to climb over that wall. You hate to imagine disappointing him, failing to get off. Youâd hate for him to put all this work in and you just canât cum in the end.Â
âHey,â he coos, âGet out of your head, pretty. Donât worry about a thing, alright?â
You take a deep breath and slowly let it out, allowing yourself to relax against the bed again. Simon waits for you to be nice and pliant around his finger before he starts to fit his ring finger alongside it. He catches sight of the furrow in your brow when he stretches you around two of his fingers. It burns but when Simon brings his thumb back to your clit, tapping against the bud, it vanishes. Your thighs twitch and you whimper, walls clenching in time with the little taps until the burning vanishes completely.
âThere we are,â he praises, âKnew you could do it, sweetheart.â
âA-Are you gonna add another?â you find yourself asking.
âLater,â he responds, scissoring the two fingers he has snug inside your cunt, ââM a big man, love. Gonna need you nice and stretched for me.â
You whimper at that, walls clenching around his fingers as he slowly begins to fuck them in and out of you. Your cheeks burn when you hear the loud, squishing noises your hole makes every time he stuffs them back inside.Â
After a moment of just getting you used to being stretched on two of his thick digits, he suddenly crooks them up and hits something inside you that makes your back arch. It causes a tingling feeling that youâve never experienced to heat your tummy every time he touches it.
âSimon!â you squeal, trying to clench your thighs closed but his broad shoulders keep them open, âTh-That feels-!â
âI know, baby,â he coos cockily, grinding his fingertips against that little spot that makes you so gooey and creamy around his fingers, âFeels real good right there, I know.â
Your back arches and your jaw drops. You canât do anything but moan and cry out as he fucks against that spot. Heâs urged on by your sounds of pure pleasure, eyes flicking between where heâs got your pretty cunt spread open and the euphoric expressions you canât do anything to hide.
Itâs so precious, seeing you so open and loud for him. You donât do anything to hide your sounds of pleasure nor do you even think of faking any of them for his sake. Every little thing youâre feeling, you express, and you canât help yourself because itâs all so new and so much.
That hot, tingling feeling in your core only intensifies with every experienced stroke of his fingers. Your eyes are rolling back every time he touches that magnificent spot inside you, abusing it with his fingers until your walls are soft and malleable for him again.
And then he brings his index finger into it. Heâs even more slow and careful as he fits it in beside the other two fingers. It doesnât burn like when he had given you his second finger but itâs a certain stretch that simply feels strange.Â
He gets you stuffed open on his three fingers, up to the third knuckle. Youâre spread so wide and squeeze his fingers so tight that it makes him moan when he thinks about what it will feel like around his cock.Â
If youâre this tight around just his fingers then youâre going to feel positively euphoric around him.Â
âSimonâŠâ you coo, reaching down to card your fingers through his hair.Â
He grunts in acknowledgement, but is unwilling to part his gaze from the sight of the creamy mess youâve begun to leave on his fingers. Your pretty clit is twitching and so swollen, glistening from your juices and he suddenly has the inescapable desire to wrap his mouth around it.Â
Youâre not even looking when he decides to do it. Itâs like he canât stop himself.Â
All you feel is something wet and hot wrap around the little bud. You practically wail at the feeling of his tongue sliding against it. Your feet kick aimlessly, hitting his back and shoulders as you flail beneath his body.Â
You sob his name, yanking harshly on his hair in a way that hurts but heâs not going to stop you. He knows itâs mean to do this, not even warning you or easing you into the feeling before heâs suckling your clit. His tongue slips in circles around it, flicking it with the tip of his tongue. His ears practically ring from how loud youâre crying out for him.Â
His three fingers remain buried inside you but heâs hardly able to move them from how tight youâre squeezing them. All he can do is grind his fingers against your g-spot but it only makes your pretty body more twitchy and makes you squirm even more beneath him. He has to hold you down so you canât get away.Â
He doesnât want your precious pussy to be ripped away from him, your juices are making his taste buds tingle â you taste so damn good.Â
That familiar heat begins to grow in your core â one youâve experienced many times before by yourself. You cry and wail for him, sobbing his name and gripping his hair.Â
âS-Si, donât stop, please, please, pleaseââ you choke on your own cries, slamming your head into the pillows as your back arches painfully hard.Â
He grunts lowly, blonde lashes fluttering as he watches your bodyâs pure, unfiltered reactions to this pleasure. He knows youâre getting close, can feel you clenching around him and your clit pulsing on his tongue in time with your heartbeat.Â
You feel yourself reaching that wall, the one you can never overcome. But it feels different this time, the pleasure isnât slowing. Itâs not fading like it always does when youâve got your own fingers on your bud.Â
It always seems to slip out of your grasp by this point.
This is it, you think. Youâre going to cum. Youâre finally going to fucking cum.Â
Then everything stops.
His tongue is gone from your clit and his fingers are nowhere to be found. Simonâs shoulders rise and fall as he watches your face flicker through a range of emotions before your eyes fill with tears and you look at him â utterly pitiful and hopeless.
âWh-WhyâŠâ you finally whisper, tongue feeling heavy in your mouth.Â
Your cunt pulses and throbs around nothing, the heat of your orgasm quickly dissipating, leaving that horribly empty and unsatisfying feeling in its wake.Â
âSorry, baby,â he coos, genuine and soft as he leans up to kiss your face, âThat was mean, huh? âM sorry. Jusâ want you to have your first orgasm on a cock, love.â
That doesnât do anything to quell your disappointment but you nod anyway, wiping away some stray tears that trickle from your eyes.Â
âPlease,â you breathlessly whisper, âPlease, Simon. Want your cock, please. I-I was so close. It felt so good,â you start babbling, eyes falling to the hard outline of his cock in his jeans, âI wanna cum so bad, Si. Y-You promised. Please, just give me your cock. Please? Please? Simon!â
Simonâs mouth goes dry as he hears your babbled begging. Fuck, youâre absolutely aching for it. All you can think about is cumming. He never thought heâd get to hear you beg for him like this, so pathetically. You should be embarrassed, begging for cock like this when youâve only just now gotten your first taste of being stretched open. Yet here you are fuckinâ crying for it.
His cock drools pre down his thigh, he can feel how wet his boxers have become from how much heâs leaking it. Heâs aching in his jeans â he canât pretend he doesnât want it just as badly as you do.
âShit, alright!â he snarls, wrapping a hand around your throat to force you to look at him. You gasp at the rough treatment, âJusâ shut up and Iâll give it to you, yeah?â
You obediently nod your head, still staring up at him with those wide, teary eyes. He tries to act like his hands arenât fucking trembling when he yanks his belt off. He doesnât think heâs ever felt this needy â this excited to get his cock inside a pussy.Â
But itâs you. Youâre special.Â
He loves you. This isnât like the one night stands and hookups heâs had in the past. This is different.Â
He feels like a fumbling teenager the way he clumsily yanks his belt out of the loops and shoves his jeans down his thighs along with his underwear. His cock, big and heavy, hangs under its own weight â it never slaps up against his stomach. He wasnât just chatting shit when he said he was a big guy.Â
He wrapped his hand around himself, giving it a few, firm tugs. He feels your eyes on him, watching the way he touches himself and it sends heat through him. He scoots closer to you again, pulling back his foreskin to show the fat, leaky head that he meanly taps against your clit.Â
You gasp a cute little âah!â when he does that brings a smile to his face. He canât say heâs the best lay for a virgin because heâs so big and heâs a brute â itâs in his nature. But heâs trying his best for you.Â
âAlright, baby,â he coos, leaning on one forearm above your head, draping his big body over yours. He easily manhandles you into position, caging your knees against your chest and wrapping himself around you, âJust relax for me, hm? Can you do that fâme?â
You nod your head and shakily put your hands on his shoulders, cupping his jaw to bring him down to kiss you. He sighs into your lips, using his free hang to grip the base of his cock, prodding against your hole. Youâre so slippery that it slides out of you and slips up your clit. You whimper at the feeling, thighs twitching at the stimulation.Â
When he finally starts to press inside, your nails bite into his shoulders. It stings â it hurts. Heâs so big, making your poor little cunt burn the deeper he presses himself. The head pops in and your hips jump at the feeling, his cock slipping back out.Â
He huffs, dropping his forehead against your shoulder, âFuck, sit still.â
âS-Sorry!â you whimper, âIâm sorry!â
âShh,â he sighs, kissing your cheek, ââS okay, baby. Hurts, huh?â
âA little,â you whimper, trying to downplay it so he wonât stop.
He hums and presses a kiss against the corner of your mouth. He knows that working an orgasm out of you before making you take his cock would be the nice thing to do but heâs selfish. He wants to feel your orgasm around his cock â where you deserve to have it.Â
Itâs your very first orgasm after all. It needs to be good and he knows he can make it real good once he can get you speared on his cock.Â
So he grips himself again, sitting up for just a moment to lewdly spit on your pussy. It hits your clit and trickles down where he catches it with the head of his cock. He leans over your body and starts to push in again. This time he tucks his arms under your shoulders and pins you impossibly against him, leaving you with nowhere to run when he starts to press into you.Â
You whimper, feet kicking against his back when he pushes deeper than before â past the head. He knows it hurts, youâre stretched beyond your limit and he waits with bated breath for you to say the word and tell him to stop.Â
But you donât.Â
You just grapple your arms around his waist and dig your nails in. His skin is sweaty by now and it makes getting any purchase on him difficult. You let out a watery little whimper that has him freezing. Youâre speared on half his cock when he finally looks at you.Â
Your eyes are teary and they slowly drip down your cheeks.
âDo you want to stop?â he asks, brushing some away with his thumb.
You immediately shake your head, no hesitation, âNo! K-Keep goinâ, Si.â
âDonât cry, pretty,â he shushes, keeping his grip under your shoulders and his hips pinned firmly against yours so you canât squirm when he starts pressing in again. Your mouth opens in a silent gasp, eyes fluttering from the ache that settles where heâs stretching you wide, ââS okay, just take a deep breath. âM almost in, love, youâre doinâ so fuckinâ good for me. Takinâ all of my cock so deep, just like you deserve. Hear me? This cock sâall yours now, yeah? Can have it whenever you need it.â
Your walls spasm around his cock as he talks, making him groan low in his chest. Heâs almost there, can feel his balls starting to tap against you the deeper he gets until finally, his hips meet yours and you wail.Â
He prods painfully against your cervix and he knows that itâs uncomfortable but heâs not willing to pull back just yet. He needs you to get used to being stretched and stuffed full of every inch of him. He takes care to do slow, gentle grinds, his pelvis catching your clit that eventually makes you relax.Â
âThatâs it,â he praises, âJust relax and let me make you feel good.â
He finally eases off of you, balancing his weight on his forearms on either side of your head, hovering over you. He slowly pulls his hips back, watching you slump against the bed when he finally stops pressing on your cervix.Â
He finally starts fucking you, sliding his cock out just a bit before rolling his hips forward again. It's slow and soft, just testing the waters and getting you used to this new stimulation.Â
It feels entirely different from his fingers. His cock is bigger, fills you so much more, touches deeper.Â
His cock reaches spots deep inside you that his fingers didnât even reach. But heâs permanently pressing against that spot his fingers were torturing. It feels so fucking good.Â
Simon can see the way your eyes roll back as he carefully fucks you. Your first cock and youâre taking it so damn well. It makes him want to see how much more you can take but he knows he needs to ease you into it, he doesn't want to overwhelm you.
âSiâŠâ you sigh softly, blinking as you struggle not to float off and become drunk with pleasure.Â
âI know, pretty,â he coos, kissing your cheek before leaning back on his heels, fastening the thrusts of his hips.Â
You canât keep quiet now, mouth falling open to let out the most precious sounds of pure pleasure. Youâre staring at him with wide eyes, like heâs hung the moon and stars in the sky just for you. His cock fucking throbs at the look of wonder that crosses your face. He knows youâre getting close, can feel how tight youâre clamping around him and he can see how much youâre creaming around him â making a mess at the base of his cock and in the thatch of curls there.Â
âYou gonna cum?â he coos, grinning when you shake your head, âOf course you are. I can fuckinâ feel it, baby. Know you got one for me, go ahead. Cum on my cock real nice, câmon.â
âC-Canât,â you whimper. Itâs too much. Youâre so wet. Itâs fucking messy but you feel yourself at that damn wall, hanging on a thread and waiting for euphoria to come but it doesnât, âPlease! Simon! Please, I-I canât! Please, please, pleaseâŠâ
âFuck,â his hisses when he hears you begging to cum on his cock, âCome on then, baby. You can do it. Just let it go, let me fuck it outta you.â
You toss your head back into the pillows as a sob is ripped from your chest. As if he can sense how much youâre struggling, he brings his thumb down to press against your clit. Your eyes fucking roll, only the whites of them visible. You clench down around him like a vice and it only takes a couple little swipes of his thumb for you to tumble over the edge.Â
It feels unlike anything you could have ever imagined. Pleasure soars through you and your hearing cuts out. It feels like you lose control of your body, unable to do anything but thrash and twitch as he fucks you through it. Youâre not sure if you would prefer him to stop or keep going because itâs all so fucking much that it hurts.Â
Youâre gushing around him, drenching his cock in sticky, creamy cum that drips in thick strings down his balls. Holy fuck.
It feels like hours that youâre speared on his cock, cumming and cumming before it finally leaves you and you collapse against the bed. Youâre still twitching, entire body shivering until he finally slows his thrusts to soft little rolls of his hips. He takes his thumb off of your clit and youâre thankful because it was starting to become unpleasant.Â
You swallow despite how dry your mouth is, eyes finally focusing on him. His brows are furrowed and his bottom lip is tucked into his mouth. Pretty, brown eyes are locked on you and you suddenly feel shy.Â
Had he been watching you the whole time? You hoped you didnât make any ugly faces or embarrassing noises.Â
âFuck,â he coos, seemingly sensing your shame, âThat was a fuckinâ orgasm, love.â
Youâre panting, you realize. And youâre tired. Youâve never felt more relaxed in your life.Â
All you can think is that youâve been missing out on that your whole life? Now youâre not sure youâll be able to even live without it ever again.Â
Simonâs hands cup under your knees and pin them to your chest. You gasp as he bends you as he sees fit. Youâre limp, so completely drunk on the pleasure you just experienced that you simply let him.Â
But you realize heâs even deeper like this â and it doesnât hurt like it did before. Heâs pressing against your back wall and it actually feels good. You feel so sensitive inside, like you can feel every twitch of his cock.Â
Heâs still languidly dragging his cock in and out of you. Itâs a fucking mess between your legs, youâve cum so fucking much that itâs everywhere. Heâs never been covered like this before and itâs fucking hot.Â
Your cum sticks between the two of you in little strings that break and reform every time his hips meet and leave yours. Your little clit is puffy and swollen from your orgasm and he wants to press his thumb against it again but he knows the poor little thing is much too sensitive still.Â
Your legs flop uselessly as he fucks you, eases you past overstimulation until youâre sweetly cooing for him again. He takes that chance to fuck you properly again, intent on finding his own orgasm deep in your cunt.Â
His heavy balls slap against your ass. He wants to cum. He plans to make himself cum like this, just using your pretty pussy. But then he sees your eyes widen again and your lips part almost curiously and his eyes narrow.
âYou feel it again, huh, sweetheart?â he goads, shifting his weight on his knees so his hips are pressed even closer to yours.Â
âC-Canât,â you whisper, the same thing you had before. But itâs different now, âW-Wonât be able to, Si.â
âS that a challenge, love?â he teases, a crooked little smile on his face. You sleepily shake your head, âHmm, I think I can fuck another one out of you. One orgasm wonât be enough, two is a good number for now. Until I train this little cunt to cum for me all night long.â
You whimper, reaching out the claw at his forearms where he pins your knees to your chest. Youâre held so uselessly open, cunt completely vulnerable to his fat cock stuffing you full. His pelvis hits your clit in a way that makes the little bud tingle and your cunt clenches pathetically around him with every thrust he gives you.Â
Sweet little âah, ah, ahâsâ are punched from your lungs every time he sinks completely inside. Heâs gripping your knees harshly, squeezing where he has a grip as his own orgasm starts to creep up on him but heâs going to give you another orgasm. He has to make you cum again, to see you lost in pleasure like that once more. He knows that will push him over the edge, give him what he needs. He wants to cum with you, fill you up while youâre in the throes of pure pleasure that only he has ever given you.Â
âFuck, fuck, fuck,â he gasps, fighting the feeling of his own eyes rolling back in favor of watching you.Â
He loves the way you wear everything you feel on your face. From the looks of wonder when it feels really good to the little rolls of your eyes when he makes it hurt just a bit. Itâs so cute.Â
Makes him want to play around with that little part of you â be a little mean to you.Â
âCum,â he growls, fighting his own orgasm down, âFuckinâ cum right now.â
âI canât!â you wail, kicking against his hold on your knees, pressing down to spread you open even further.Â
His hips slam against yours, loud slaps and slick noises of your gooey cunt filling his ears, âYou can. You will. Cum, sweetheart. You better fuckinâ cum.â
But you shake your head. Itâs so close, you can feel it. Itâs creeping up on you and you want it so bad. You want to feel that pleasure again. But youâre not even sure youâre going to be able to cum again, it feels so much more sensitive than before. Itâs too much.Â
Simon bares his teeth, letting go of one of your legs to drift between your thighs. Your eyes widen, you think heâs going to rub it again â itâs so sensitive that youâre not sure youâll be able to take it.Â
But instead, he does something else.
You hear it before you feel it, a soft little slap followed by the feeling of being electrocuted. Simon watches you with lidded eyes to see how you react. Just like he expected, you wail and your body gives a mean twitch at the impact.Â
So he does it again.Â
And again.Â
And again.
Not too hard, just enough for it to hurt a little bit. A sting against a terribly sensitive little bud. Itâs mean â heâs mean. But he canât fucking help it.Â
He needs you to cum for him again.
âCum,â he snarls, giving your clit another slap.
As if on command, it sends you over the edge. Your legs kick out and he has to abandon your clit to hold you down, pinning you harshly to the bed as he uses all his weight to fuck down into your spasming little cunt. Youâre cumming so hard around him that you stop breathing. He hears the hitch of breath and doesnât hear the exhale. All you do is lay there, cry for him and cum.
He finds his end just as violently, tossing his head back to moan into the room as cum erupts from his cock. His thrusts grow sloppy as he milks the orgasm out of himself, voice breaking as he whimpers from how fucking good it feels.Â
Like no orgasm heâs ever experienced. Itâs like he canât stop cumming, filling you up so much that it oozes out from around his cock.Â
Youâre trembling underneath him when he finally comes down, tearfully gazing up at him with your mouth agape, struggling to catch your breath.
âN-No more,â you pathetically whimper, legs twitching from the aftershocks, âC-Canât take anymore, Si.â
âShh,â he shushes, letting your legs go so you can relax comfortably as he pulls his cock from your pussy.
Itâs twitching and clenching sporadically, still coming down from your orgasm. It makes his cum drip out of your cunt, a mess that spreads to the already messy sheets. Your cum and his mix together to make a sticky, gooey mess that makes his mouth water. He wants to eat it up, stuff his tongue into your tight little hole and swallow it all down.Â
But he canât. Maybe next time, he vows.
His cock gives a valiant kick at the thought of getting to do this again. He sits on his heels, gazing at his messy cock as if softens. He feels dazed, almost drunk.Â
Then he hears the softest little sniffle from you and his eyes snap up to your face to find your crumpled expression and tears falling down your face. You cover your face with your hands and earnestly begin to cry.
âHey, itâs alright, love,â he coos, laying beside you to tuck you into his chest.
âI-I donât know why Iâm crying,â you sob, wrapping your arms around his waist as you cry into him.Â
âIt happens,â he assures, âIt was a lot and youâre just a little overwhelmed sâall. Just let it out, baby.â
And you do, weakly sobbing into his chest until it feels like you canât cry anymore. He holds you through it all, rubbing your back and cooing sweet nothings in your ear until you grow silent.Â
âAlright, love?â he asks.
âS-Sorry, Si,â you sniffle, finally pulling out of the spot in his arms you were hiding in, âI-I donât want you to think I didnât want it or that it was bad. I justâŠâ
He gives you a soft smile, leaning forward to kiss you. Itâs short and sweet, âI donât think that. Like I said, it happens. Sometimes people just cry after sex, nothinâ to worry about.â
âAre you sure?â you sniffle, wiping your cheeks dry when the tears finally stop.
âPositive,â he sits up, âLetâs get cleaned up, alright? We need to change the damn sheets, fuckinâ hell.â
You giggle as you look down at the sheets where a very visible dark spot is sitting where you once laid. You donât even have time to be embarrassed before heâs swooping you off of the bed and escorting you to the bathroom.
Itâs too small for both of you to fit but you make it work. He wipes you down with a warm cloth before hopping into the shower to rinse and clean himself before he gets out and lets you do the same. While you do that, he changes the bedding completely and replaces it with new sheets and blankets for the two of you to sleep in together.Â
When you finally stumble into the bedroom, he wraps his arms around you and urges you onto the bed. You giggle as you flop onto the bed before he crawls in after you and covers the both of you up, wrapping himself around you until youâre tucked securely against him.Â
âI take it you liked it?â he finally whispers.
You shyly nod, âI-It was umâŠfun.â
âFelt real good, huh?â he teases, grinning wolfishly when you whimper.
âY-Yeah,â you whisper, âIt felt really good. I already want to do it again.â
Simon groans, hugging you tightly before shaking his head, âYouâre gonna be insatiable. Gonna give my cock a run for its money.â
You giggle, affectionately petting his hair before he looks at you with the softest expression youâve ever seen. Itâs like his eyes are sparkling in the low light of the bedroom. He leans forward and ever so softly kisses your forehead, then your nose, before he reaches your lips. He pecks them softly, pulling back for just a second before he kisses you again.Â
âI love you,â he whispers, so soft that you almost miss it.Â
And your heart begins to race. You almost struggle to find the words to reciprocate. But when you do, he smiles and tucks you against him again, big arms wrapped around you like a bear hug.
Itâs almost surreal. You canât believe youâre here after everything â with him.Â
Like youâve dreamed your whole life, he loves you just like you love him.Â
PART ONE.
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