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Leaning against what was left of that wall Felix could not help the amused look to his face. It was like having one of those purse dogs barking at you just.... Less fluffy and generally full of hate. “You do that..... And you’ll be the first to fly through two walls in one day.” He pointed out before giving, Dryden a quick look. It was clear that Dryden didn’t find this funny at all and he could probably see why...... But it wasn’t like Felix had done something on puropse. “Give it a few minutes. But you’ll probably feel it for a while.”

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Felix was close to laughing, this was stupid. He understood fully why Ariadne was less than amuse but there was only one way picking a fight with Felix tended to end and well…. This was it. “Demetri, go tell Aro.” Felix sigh as he looked back at the shorter vampire. This was going to be a headache he could deal with later once Ariadne could get up of the pile she was currently laying and complaining in. “Yeah, yeah, it’ll heal.”

“I swear I’ll kick your ass… You’ll see….” There was way less vindication in her tone than before, almost as if she had resigned herself to not really fight him for real, but continued the joke anyway. “…As soon as I can get up… It’s over for you, you brute.” Demetri left, still chuckling, to find Aro, while Ari let out a little painful sigh. “…Dryden don’t give me that look…” The kind of look of disapproval only a significant annoyance she had been married to for almost a hundred years could give. The kind of look which said “absolutely not, he’s going to kill you” and “if it’s a joke I do not find it funny dear”. “…How long until I can at least sit back ?”

#AU Always sunny in Volterra

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the volturi   requested by @coroncre.

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Felix was close to laughing, this was stupid. He understood fully why Ariadne was less than amuse but there was only one way picking a fight with Felix tended to end and well.... This was it. “Demetri, go tell Aro.” Felix sigh as he looked back at the shorter vampire. This was going to be a headache he could deal with later once Ariadne could get up of the pile she was currently laying and complaining in. “Yeah, yeah, it’ll heal.”

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“You can’t reach that high dear…..!” Felix sigh as he looked back at Ariadne in the rubble. That maybe wasn’t the most clever thing to say but no matter how angry she was at the moment…. Felix could not take it seriously and it showed. “Perhaps go and tell Aro we got a problem.” He added, looking towards Dryden who right now looked like he could have listed 50 other places he would rather have been at at the moment. “Sure dear….!” He sigh as he scratched the back of his head. Healing injuries was bad even when a stone wall wasn’t included.

“I can ! I will !” Felix was probably underestimating the petty viciousness of the blond. Or Ariadne was overestimating her anger and general physical state. One thing that was certain : she was in great pain and slight distress, especially when he asked Dryden to go fetch Aro. ”Can’t Demetri go instead ?” Ari sighed as she grabbed her husband’s hand - even that simple gesture sent jolt of pain through her arm. ”….It hurts so fucking much….”

#AU Always sunny in Volterra

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Maybe I’ll see you in another life, if this one wasn’t enough.

Florence + the Machine (via thoughtkick)

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𝐍𝐄𝐓𝐅𝐋𝐈𝐗'𝐒   𝐓𝐇𝐄    𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐑    𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐓𝐒.

these are taken from the netflix show with the same title, TRIGGERING TOPICS MENTIONED BELOW: PLEASE READ & REBLOG WITH CAUTION, feel free to adjust any you that you deem necessary.

you’re not gonna believe this.

i’m just gutted i can’t be there.

you didn’t have to stay with her/him/them, you know?

you didn’t have to stay when she told you she was pregnant.

i’m sorry.. do i… do i know you?

she made it up. she was never pregnant.

who are you? why are you saying this?

does that really matter?

think of me as a stranger. a stranger that knows.

how do you know my wife? who the hell are you?

let’s get this show on the road.

think of me as a friend that just released you from prison.

you should be thanking me because now you know she’s a liar.

i’m sorry i wasn’t there.

i’ll tell you what it is, some fucking weird shit.

oh, it’s giving me the creeps.

what do you think’s going on there, on the leg? are they bite marks?

i’d say that there’s a reasonable chance that they are human.

it’s not fucking silence of the lambs!

well, you are kind of holding him against his will..

i was a cop for thirty four years. i understand the definition of kidnap.

are you fucking kidding me?

calm down? i’m calling the police!

what is it? [optional:name], where are you going?

did you fake your pregnancy?

what the hell are you talking about?

can we just skip this part? the part where you pretend to not know..

well, if you know, why are you asking?

what else are you capable of?

now, you better start talking right now.

what are you gonna do? keep me captive?

this isn’t what you think. there’s more to this.

let’s do the trip. come on, me and you, thelma and louise across the states.

we all have our secrets, [name:optional].

told me what? what do you mean?

why do you have a llama head in here?

after the rave last night, this clown starts throwing stones at my window.

like, someone must’ve spiked my drink or something.

it’s a pretty cold world out there.. not knowing.. where they’ve gone.. it’s the worst.

do any of you know about a gathering in the woods the other night?

i got what i’ve want, did you see those faces?

they’re hiding something.

your secrets safe with me.

okay, i think i may have found a way to get rid of the alpaca head.

i might have found a way to get the police off your back.

we bury the head in the woods, surrounded by satanic symbols.

what’s actually wrong with you?

shut the fuck up or i will finish you off..

that’s a beautiful ring.

is this some kind of joke?

it’s the internet. everyone leaves a trace. it’s all in here.

i know it’ll take time to come to terms with it but eventually you’ll thank me.

do you plan on telling anyone else?

take the envelope. the proof is in there. now you can expose his secret.

you didn’t reveal a secret. you just created another one.

i can’t help you if you keep shutting me out, okay?

so, how did a bag covered in blood come to be in your possession?

so the bag was carrying a significant amount of blood.

if he dies.. this becomes a murder investigation.

right now, you are the link in all this.

withholding information is a serious crime.

i’m going home. you can stay if you want.

sorry, i have to go to the hospital.

listen… i, i need to tell you something..

think it was something to do with the party?

you haven’t heard? he’s been arrested.

don’t get angry. i spiked him.

makes you wonder what else he could be capable of, doesn’t it?

he’s done some pretty stupid shit but he’s not a bad guy.

does that make me… like, an accessory to murder?

you stay away from my family! you hear me?

this has nothing to do with that.

how many times have you done that?

i take this personal information wasn’t entirely welcomed?

i’m sorry, i didn’t mean to scare you, okay?

are you thick or what? i’m not interested in anything you have to say.

you should be ‘cause you have no idea!

are you really gonna marry this man?

well, you don’t think i’m doing this shit for fun, do you?

well, there’s a fine line between love and madness.

i don’t expect everyone to get it.

who doesn’t want to be loved that much? so madly, so passionate, they’ll risk everything.

if you knew where she went, you would tell us?

why can’t you just be honest with me?

i know all about you.

you’re what they used to call a “ladies man.”

the affairs you’ve had over the years… caused a lot of pain.

i don’t know you and you certainly don’t know me.

you have a child. from one of your affairs. i have proof.

if you’re looking for money you’re gonna have to do better than that.

i need to be on this case.

funny response. i checked the phone records.

i lied… to protect you. as a mate.

why didn’t you come to me? you should of said something.

[optional:name], nobody wants this to be happening.

she said she had a way of proving she was innocent.

i don’t see a domestic dispute being settled with a gun.

stranger things have happened.

someone tried to make it look like a robbery.

who brings a gun to a cake shop?

you got a girlfriend?

i’m sure there’s some rational explanation.

well, the next question is… who put it there?

murdered? i mean, it’s not an accident, is it? someone wanted to hurt her.

why would anyone do this?

we’ll get the bastard who did this.

there’s tea in the pot. and i made some scones earlier.

do you want the scone before or after the hug?

you’re home now. let it out.

don’t answer my next statement with ‘i can’t’.

you’re not gonna suggest sex, are you?

take some time off. you shouldn’t be anywhere near this case.

you didn’t come for small talk.

i can’t handle a really big thing here so you wanna just tell me what you want?

look, what difference doe it make? it was all way back.

for chirst’s sake, what am i doing here?

i don’t know why you’re trawling all this up but it was a mistake.

i need to report a missing person.

do you want the weird news or the really weird news?

i had a ham salad for lunch but my fingers smell like fish. weird.

why was she planning to fly away with you?

are you a lesbian? were you and my mum—

i think my dad’s keeping something from me.

got these terrible cramps but hopefully the fresh air will help.

something seriously strange has gone down.

i’m sure someone knows the truth about all this. it’ll come out. it always does.

something happened recently that made me reflect.

how did that make you feel, experiencing such a new emotion?

did they ask who organized the rave?

you lied to the police?

who organized the rave, and who was dealing, is not their main concern.

i’m measuring their dicks to put an end to an argument.

we have reason to believe that your wife was at the scene of a murder.

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“Yeah that’s about the time you’ll have to wait.” Felix smiled. There was no chance in hell he would ever do that voluntary and trying to force Felix to do anything was..... Usually followed by a horrible act of grusome violence. “Yes very in character for me.” That one he could admitt. Sure it usually didn’t lead to...... This but he did have a tendency to pick people up who didn’t want to be picked up. Running his hand up Ariadne’s tigh before grabbing onto her hand. Felix perhaps wasn’t the person with the cleanest rap sheet around and that covered most aspects of his life. “And just a little bit rude.”

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“Believe me when i say no one has.” Felix replied humorously. He wasn’t bad at singing he just really didn’t like doing it and especially not with anyone around. “And you won’t either.” He added quickly with a chuckle. Listening to Ariadne he tilted his head so slightly as he watched her. She had a patience that Felix himself wasn’t exactly known to have in any situation at all. “Well didn’t think picking you up was much better.”

“Aw…Well, I have the eternity to try to hear that, then, right ?” Ariadne mused with a little chuckle, before slightly tilting her head too. They were probably too close now to stop. Too far into a very pleasant game, with the promise of a more pleasureable outcome… Not that it took especially much from the blonde to succomb to temptation anyway. “Oh that would have been very rude ! But quite in-character for you, I admit…” How did they said, back then ? Miss Greyhall is sliding towards a very dishonoring path and she’s not even trying to stop it. And proud of it, she thought, as her fingers tiptoed along Felix’s hand. Playful and inviting.

#AU Not quite dessert

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“You can’t reach that high dear.....!” Felix sigh as he looked back at Ariadne in the rubble. That maybe wasn’t the most clever thing to say but no matter how angry she was at the moment.... Felix could not take it seriously and it showed. “Perhaps go and tell Aro we got a problem.” He added, looking towards Dryden who right now looked like he could have listed 50 other places he would rather have been at at the moment. “Sure dear....!” He sigh as he scratched the back of his head. Healing injuries was bad even when a stone wall wasn’t included.

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Yeah he had maybe been a bit to rough on her….. But she was talking! That was good after all. “You’ll be fine!” Felix replied but could not help the slight grimace. He could himself imagine just how bad that had hurt and Felix still had a pain tolerance and stubborness that rivaled few. Scratching the back of his head, Felix looked down at Ariadne in the rubble as she spoke. Aro was going to be everything but amused about this whole thing and he clearly wasn’t alone about that. “Well….. Hopefully sooner?”

“Ash shoon az I cgzan bet up, Imgonna wrrreck you, Felix !” She could feel her body heal, yes, but slower than usual - which meant she did take a few bigger damages than usual. Which, of course, made Ari’s anger skyrocket as she wiggled around, trying to get up. Or point menacingly at Felix. Or both. To no avail, and even more pain. “I hhhhhhhate you !” At least, she could scream, now, which was….A good sign. Maybe.

#AU Always sunny in Volterra

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“Believe me when i say no one has.” Felix replied humorously. He wasn’t bad at singing he just really didn’t like doing it and especially not with anyone around. “And you won’t either.” He added quickly with a chuckle. Listening to Ariadne he tilted his head so slightly as he watched her. She had a patience that Felix himself wasn’t exactly known to have in any situation at all. “Well didn’t think picking you up was much better.”

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“I can sing to if that make you feel better.” Felix chuckled as he uncrossed his legs. At least they seemed to be on the same page about what was going on. Would it be one of the best ideas they got lately? No of course not. Putting his hand on Ariadne’s tigh he smirked so slightly as he looked back at her. “Come on we got some time before we have to go back…!”

“Ah !…I don’t know, I’ve never heard you sing before…” But she had heard Heidi and that…Was not a pleasing experience. At all. The hand on her tigh made Ariadne gasp, slightly leaning towards Felix. Still with a smirk on her lips, of course, and a taunting voice, almost pouting even. One was allowed to make the game last, right ? “Oh, we do, yes. But….This is not an inviting way of asking for that…”

#AU Not quite dessert

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aesthetic: The Volturi

Hear me out…

If Stephenie Meyer had written Twilight as some gothic, classic novel about the vampires, I would have been first in line to read it.

Imagine, if Twilight was never about Bella or the Cullens but of the Volturi and their reign over other covens and Volterra?

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send  “chomp”  for  my  muse  to  bite  yours.    (  could  be  spicy,  romantic,  aggressive,  deadly…  it’s  a  surprise!  )

#this is going to go great

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“There is no one that can replace you Demetri, how long you have been here should prove that on it’s own!” Felix sigh. He hated seeing Demetri like this and it just seemed to get worse with time passing. It was a flaw no one had been aware of before now. “I promise you, it’s going to be fine. I hate seeing you like this.” He added as he cupped Demetri’s face with his hands. 

@ittna​ get a thing!

“Demetri! Come on be reasonable! You are not replacable yet! It’s one person, one! You can find the rest of the whole family, it’s going to be fine, i promise!” This was going to take a while, he could already tell. He had never seen Demetri like this before.

#V; Monstrum naturale

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“I can sing to if that make you feel better.” Felix chuckled as he uncrossed his legs. At least they seemed to be on the same page about what was going on. Would it be one of the best ideas they got lately? No of course not. Putting his hand on Ariadne’s tigh he smirked so slightly as he looked back at her. “Come on we got some time before we have to go back...!”

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“I can use my mouth for better things.” Was that crass? Yes. Yet no one seemed especially shocked. “You only got yourself to blame for that one.” Felix added with a slight smirk, the red eyes focused on Ariadne who at the moment looked rather unimpressed. Maybe they just needed to get the absolute crap talking out of their system somewhere where about thirty people wouldn’t hear what you where saying.  

“Oh, really ? Color me impressed…” She arched her brows once more, before sitting in a much normal way. Ariadne’s tone was still taunting, her little smirk creeping back up on her lips. “…Because so far, you’ve only done an awful lot of talking and not much else…” How long before the train wreck ? That was a really good question, somewhere, at the back of her mind, where she wondered if she would say no to him. If something happened, of course. Ari wasn’t against some fun - in fact, she had been labelled “promiscuous” when she was still human, so it wasn’t really a lack of desire…. But she was still the “youngest” member of the coven. Will it be considered a fault, if she did ? Was it an unspoken rule or tradition ? She didn’t really know, after all.

#AU Not quite dessert

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MONUMENT TO DANTE (1865): Piazza Santa Croce, Florence, Italy.

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Assorted Quotes from LotR’s Special Features because I’ve lost my mind:

“I’m fascinated by his blood clots.” “I can’t ride the horse, babes.” “It’s spontaneous, violent love.” “I love Daft Punk.” “I’m even afraid to take a bath.” “If we flip over, just save yourself.” “An amazingly tough splinter, I think. Probably made of titanium.” “Its gonna be like, this big and I’m gonna get it framed.” “I’m running at a dead sprint.” “[Name] can play with my clots anytime he wants to.” “I’m trying to talk without moving my lips.” “I can’t swim.” “It was a sort of really ridiculous, fantastically foolish idea.” “Say something sweet and endearing and then smash your head against theirs.” “White light! White light!” “But I think he enjoyed it.” “It does seem silly, now, in retrospect.” “I’d scored an injury.” “My lungs are hurting, I feel like my pancreas has been split.” “I think my spleen has been ostracized.” “I hope we’ve made it difficult for you.” “Welcome to the [place], you found it, congratulations.” “I have been searching for him all my life.” “Sit back, enjoy, wear a smoking jacket. And a bib.” “It’s very early in the morning.” “EXCUSE ME I INTERRUPT YOU.” “You are a beautiful man.” “There is no gay connotation to that whatsoever.” “You kick balls?” “Do you wear wigs? Have you worn wigs? Will you wear wigs? When will you wear wigs?” “I heard you collect sex toys.” “You fucker! I fucking knew it!” “The dolphin is dead, died in a car accident.” “This is kind of a happy moment.” “I think I fell in love for a split second. And then I felt a bit sick.” “I couldn’t look at [Name] for a couple days. Felt dirty.” “I was kinda jealous because I remember the first party we kissed each other.” “I’ve kissed most of the boys.” “Let’s go kiss again.” “Really, I am a girl.” “I actually happen to know of a story.” “I can’t honestly deny anything that has been said or implied.” “Never go for the kind of dark-brown beard, but strawberry-blonde.” “I was thinking to myself, that sounds dull as hell.” “That’s my gob of spit. It’s mine. My own. My precious gob of spit.” “I think I felt tongue.” “That’s my saliva.” “My guts used to really ache from it.” “We will kill you, you jerk.” “I was part of the witch-hunt that went on.” “It’s okay, but we need to make it bigger.” “This thing’s getting huge, it’s totally impractical now.” “It went from impractical to ridiculous.” “Some people call it a mace, some people call it a morning star.” “Either way, I ended up calling it damned heavy.” “It works because it’s ludicrously large.” “Is he a human being?” “It was pretty creepy and pretty gross.” “I haven’t been taking my antibiotics.” “I’ve got a cold sore that’s obviously gone wrong.” “Alright, fucking…Jesus.” “It gives you this uneasy sense that something’s weird.” “Maybe we shouldn’t talk about that.” “Do you scratch?”

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“I can use my mouth for better things.” Was that crass? Yes. Yet no one seemed especially shocked. “You only got yourself to blame for that one.” Felix added with a slight smirk, the red eyes focused on Ariadne who at the moment looked rather unimpressed. Maybe they just needed to get the absolute crap talking out of their system somewhere where about thirty people wouldn’t hear what you where saying.  

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“I can undress you with my hands instead….. Still indecent?” Felix chuckled as he leaned back against the back of the couch. That maybe was taking it a bit far but what else was new? No one expected something decent to come out of Felix mouth by now. They had some free time before they had to go back after all.

She crossed her arms on her chest, brows quirked as he spoke, an unimpressed smirk on her face. “All mouth and probably no acts…” Was it a dangerous thing to say ? Oh yes, probably. But they needed to rentabilize the flat, didn’t they ? And besides, for all Ariadne knew, they were simply joking, didn’t they ?

#AU Not quite dessert

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I’m not perfect… But I’m enough.

Carl Rogers (via thoughtkick)