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Gender and Sexuality Portfolio Post Four: Connection to Pop Culture

         As discussed in Gender Stories: Negotiating identity in a binary world, there is a “gender binary matrix” that functions as an ever-present and pervasive system for influencing our daily gendered experiences, attitudes, behaviors, and beliefs (Foss, Domenico, & Foss, 2013). Starting in childhood and continuing throughout adulthood, we learn gendered expectations through exposure to gender stories that either retell, revise, or rewrite the gender binary (Foss, Domenico, & Foss, 2013). One of the most prominent sources of gender stories in our society is popular culture. The special interest topic of motherhood within the gender binary matrix can be studied in a variety of pop culture artifacts, from television shows and movies to music from a broad range of genres.        

         Popular television shows that depict motherhood include Gilmore Girls, MTV’s Teen Mom, TLC’s Toddlers and Tiaras, and Lifetime’s Dance Moms. Kanye West’s hip-hop song “Hey Mama”, as well as Carrie Underwood’s country song “Mama’s Song,” also comment on women’s roles as mothers. As for movies, the film Juno portrays teenage motherhood using drama and romance while the film Bad Moms exposes the challenges of motherhood through comedy. I ultimately decided to focus on the movie Bad Moms because its plot appeared to be the most intentional in taking a particular stance on motherhood and the societal expectations that govern it. Specifically, Bad Moms depicts the story of a mother who is tired of trying to conform to the oftentimes impractical and unattainable expectations of motherhood in the gender binary matrix. By using comedy, the film manages to revise the gender binary by expanding it, but ultimately still retells the gender binary through reinscription.

          The reinscription mechanism for retelling the gender binary is twofold- the gender binary is first challenged, only to be later reinforced by a more compelling message (Foss, Domenico, & Foss, 2013). The opening scenes of Bad Moms exemplify the first step of challenging the binary. Tired of the binary’s impracticable expectation that women should be able to “do it all”- be loyal and committed to their work but prioritize motherhood and be a selfless and devoted principal caregiver- the protagonist Amy Mitchell satirically walks the audience through the ridiculous number of tasks and activities that a mother’s typical day entails. Her opening lines “I had my first kid when I was twenty years old and I’ve been running late ever since” are intended to critique the unrealistic expectations and challenges of motherhood (Block, Todd, Lucas, & Moore, 2016). Feeling underappreciated and as she could never win, Amy and two other moms, Kiki and Carla decide to outwardly challenge the binary expectations and be “bad” moms that take into account their own needs and desires. This leads to Amy running against Gwendolyn, the epitome of the binary mother, for president of the parent-teacher association (PTA).

          Being a bad mom and trying to overthrow the “good” mom from her position of power in the PTA is supposed to be Amy’s way of standing up to the unwarranted prescriptions of the gender binary. Taken alone, these two aspects of the movie’s plot suggest a critique, and therefore revision, of the binary. A more critical analysis of the plot, however, reveals that reinscription of the gender binary is actually occurring. Amy initially has fun and finds satisfaction in being a bad mom, but as the plot progresses, her actions as a bad mom lead to her life falling apart. Her daughter and son grow resentful towards Amy and decide to leave and live with their dad.  Amy even loses her job after merely standing up for herself for once. The message sent is that the binary expectations of motherhood are prevailing and must be adhered to in order to have a positive experience as a mother. Even in the end, when Amy does win the election and becomes president of the PTA, this is not a true victory for the premise of “bad” moms that are free from the binary shackles. Rather, her election as PTA president reinforces the binary expectation of mothers being the parents that are most involved in their children’s upbringing and education.

          Although the overarching plot of the movie serves to reinscribe the gender binary, there are nuances in the plot that revise the gender binary by expanding it. That is, certain gender performances in the movie suggest multiplicity in the ways of being a man or woman, allowing “the categories of female and male to become larger and to encompass more characteristics and qualities appropriate to the genders than the binary usually allows” (Foss, Domenico, & Foss, 2013, p. 124). One small yet clear example of an expansion of the binary is Amy’s choice to stop driving the stereotypical minivan and start driving a bold, bright red 1970 Dodge Challenger “muscle” car. Driving this type of car is usually prescribed to males as a symbol of masculinity, status, and superiority. By driving this daring car, Amy’s gender story expands to encompass qualities that are not typically feminine and the gender binary is in effect revised.

          A second example of revision of the gender binary through expansion can be seen in the progression of Kiki’s gender story. In the beginning of the movie, Kiki is presented as a strange and friendless stay-at-home mother who is utterly devoted to her children and husband. She adheres to her husband’s every demand, even bizarre requests such as ironing his underwear daily because he likes his underwear stiff. Kiki puts up with silly requests from her children just the same, exemplified when she turns down a drink with friends, saying “I have to go home and clean out my son’s hamster cage, ‘cause he gets so mad when I don’t” (Block, Todd, Lucas, & Moore, 2016).  Throughout the movie, Kiki continues to be controlled by her kids and husband until one day she finally has enough. After her husband demands that she come home to take care of the kids, Kiki shocks everyone by fiercely stating “And I said, I’m going to the fucking PTA meeting with my fucking friends, so stop being such a goddamn pussy and make it work” (Block, Todd, Lucas, & Moore, 2016). From here on out, Kiki becomes the one who is in control in the relationship, thereby revising the gender binary by expanding her gender story to include qualities of assertiveness and power that are usually reserved for males and not females.  

          By applying gender literacy concepts from Gender Stories Chapter 5, the film Bad Moms becomes more than just a comedy about motherhood- it becomes a powerful tool for the social construction of gender and gendered expectations. Although the film obviously challenges the binary with the glamorizing of “bad” moms who take into account their own wishes and needs, the binary is ultimately reinforced. Amy, the leader of the bad moms, is punished with rejection from her family and work. In the end, even though relations with her family and work improve, Amy is still restrained to a stereotypical role as a PTA president, which reinforces the expectation that women take on the primary roles in their children’s upbringing and education. Despite reinscription of the binary, there are instances of expansion that revise the binary, such as Amy’s new choice of car and Kiki’s newly found assertiveness.

          Instead of negatively viewing Bad Moms for partially retelling the gender binary, audience members should seek to learn from the way reinscription was employed. Perhaps the punishment and rejection that the bad moms encountered are telling of what women go through when they try to deviate from the gendered expectations, and the producers may have simply aimed to portray this accurately. Rather than be upset about the reinforcement of the binary, we should ask what enabled the retelling of the gender binary, which so unfairly dictates many women’s experiences as mothers.

                                                       References

Block, B., Todd, S. (Producers), & Lucas, J., Moore, S. (Directors). (2016). Bad   

          Moms [Motion Picture]. United States: Universal Studios Home 

          Entertainment.

Foss, S.K., Domenico, M.E., Foss, K.A. (2013). Gender Stories: Negotiating 

         identity in a binaryworld. Long Grove, IL: Waveland Press.   

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Gender and Sexuality Portfolio Post Three: Connection to Current Events

            “Conception.” “An original idea” (Williams, 2018).  “The action of conceiving a child” (Williams, 2018). Although there exists a single, generalized understanding of conception, the lived experience of conception and motherhood are as nuanced as our fingerprints. The New York Time’s latest TimesVideo series “Conception- Six Stories of Motherhood” provides an opportunity to further explore the foundational concept of intersectionality as a tool for seeing, thinking, and understanding motherhood. Intersectionality, as discussed in our gender and sexuality course, is both a theoretical framework and analytical approach that seeks to understand how people’s various identities intersect to influence their individual and institutional level experiences of oppression and privilege (Launius & Hassel, 2015). An intersectional approach to studying motherhood means asking not only “What about women?” but “Which women?” (Launius & Hassel, 2015). The six conception stories presented in the TimesVideo series exemplify the rich diversity of micro-level identities that exist among women, and how they relate to macro-level ideologies, such as the dominant, binary intensive-mothering ideology.

           The inadequacies of the binary mothering ideology, which sets an expectation that women be intensive mothers who selflessly prioritize parenting and commit to a primary caregiver role, can be highlighted by asking the intersectional question, “Which women?” (Dow 2016; Henderson, Harmon, & Newman, 2017). Unlike what is suggested by the binary intensive-mothering ideology, womanhood and motherhood are not one and the same for all women. To address the question of “Which women?”, the TimesVideo series delves into micro-level identities such marriage status, age, mental health status, gender, and reproductive health status. Each of the conception stories present women with unique takes on mothering ideology- some in opposition to, while others in alignment with, the expectations set forth by the binary intensive mothering ideology.

           Teen mom, Marie, presents her story of motherhood as one full of feelings of guilt, failure, blame and being lost- feelings which are not endorsed by the binary intensive mothering ideology (Williams, 2018).  She admits not being connected to motherhood at all, and at one point resenting even her daughter Mia for existing (Williams, 2018). Another woman, Yael, gives insight into the influence of depression on her experience of motherhood, speaking of “ice” and “acid” to describe the pain that she felt was rooted in the gap between the expectation and reality of life as a mother (Williams, 2018). A gap that could be linked to the double standards and conflicting expectations within the binary mothering ideology. While Marie and Yael opposed the dominant mothering ideology and experienced adverse emotions, Gabrielle, a transgender woman, had a deep desire to uphold much of the dominant mothering ideology and still experienced pain for not being able to completely embody “motherhood” as it is envisioned today. Gabrielle explains, “I am a mother in all senses of the word except the physical one and there is nothing I can do about it and it hurts. It will always hurt” (Williams, 2018).  

           The intersectional approach of asking “Which women?” affords a better understanding of the nuances in the lived experience of motherhood, as depicted by the TimesVideo series on conception. Even more, the intersectional approach reveals that even though the binary intensive mothering ideology serves as the dominant belief system from which to judge the decisions that women make in regard to motherhood, it does not adequately characterize the values and lived experience of all mothers. This suggests that alternative mothering ideologies, ones that are not grounded in the gender binary system, are needed to adequately frame the experience and challenges of motherhood.

Link to TimesVideo series:

 https://www.nytimes.com/video/well/family/100000005653903/conception-trailer.html

                                                      References

Dow, D.M. (2016). Integrated motherhood: beyond hegemonic ideologies of 

        motherhood. Journal of Marriage and Family, 78, 180-196. doi:            

        10.1111/jomf.12264.

Henderson, A., Harmon, S., & Newman, H. (2016). The price mothers pay, even 

        when they are not buying it: mental health consequences of idealized 

        motherhood. Sex Roles, 74, 512-526. doi: 10.1007/s11199-015-0534-5.

Launius, C., Hassel, H. (2015). Threshold concepts in women’s and gender 

        studies: Ways of seeing, thinking, and knowing. New York, NY: Taylor & 

       Francis.

Williams, M. C. (Producer). (2018, January 16). Conception: Six stories of 

      motherhood [Video file]. Retrieved from  

      https://www.nytimes.com/video/well/family/100000005653903/conception-       

      trailer.html

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Gender and Sexuality Portfolio Post Two: Connection to Foundational Course Concepts

          Within academic fields of study, such as women’s and gender studies, there are foundational concepts that serve as tools for seeing, thinking, and understanding the content that is being explored. Motherhood, as a special interest topic within the study of gender and sexuality, calls for the application of foundational concepts that can characterize the lived experiences of mothers within a gender binary matrix that serves as the backdrop for daily gendered experiences, behaviors, attitudes, and beliefs. The social construction of gender, agency, privilege, oppression, and intersectionality are five foundational concepts within the study of gender and sexuality that will be defined and used to explore examples of issues that women face in relation to motherhood, work, and emotional health.

         Gender, as a social construction, is created through individual interpretations that are inherently filtered and shaped by a system of cultural norms and definitions (Foss, Domenico, & Foss, 2013). These cultural expectations prescribe ideals of appearance, behavior, and personality depending on whether you identify as a male or female (Foss, Domenico, & Foss, 2013). The pressure to conform to a socially-constructed “reality” of gender starts in childhood and is oftentimes based on norms that are impractical and unattainable. Idealized motherhood is an example of a socially constructed expectation that helps to define what it means to be a woman.  

         Andrea O’Reilly’s (2016) analysis of Lionel Shriver’s book We Need to Talk about Kevin exposes the idealized directives and expectations of patriarchal motherhood that lead to a discrepancy between women’s expectations of motherhood and their experience of it (O’Reilly, 2016) According to O’Reilly, the “sacred truths of motherhood” can be summarized as follows: “mothers love their children unconditionally, women are happy in motherhood, and women naturally know how to be a mother” (O’Reilly, 2016, p. 66). This ideological construction of motherhood permits only one reality for all women, regardless of individual differences in temperament, desires, and capabilities. The oversimplification of the complex reality of motherhood, combined with “inaccurate”, “ill-informed”, and “disabling” expectations for motherhood, leads to women feeling regret, anxiety, doubt, and guilt (O’Reilly, 2016). Even more, O’Reilly (2016) suggests that the strict expectations of patriarchal motherhood serve to disempower women by denying them agency, which will be discussed next.

         Agency, in a general context, can be understood as one’s self-efficacy. That is, one’s belief that they are capable of changing and controlling their life events and outcomes (Foss, Domenico, & Foss, 2013). In gender studies, agency is the belief that you have control over, and play an active role in creating, the reality in which you play out your daily gendered experiences, behaviors, attitudes, and beliefs (Foss, Domenico, & Foss, 2013). The social construction of gender, however, and the limiting definitions of what it means to be a male versus female, affect one’s ability to practice agency by providing distinct rules for how each gender should enact agency (Foss, Domenico, & Foss, 2013). Oftentimes, women are expected to give up some of their agency and be dependent on others to create change (Foss, Domenico, & Foss, 2013).  

         According to Donath (2015) and her research on agency within motherhood, the transition to motherhood among Israeli-Jewish women is characterized by passive decision-making that lacks both reflection of one’s own desires and consideration of the potential consequences. Donath (2015) coins this as an “automatic” transition to motherhood in which the self-awareness and evaluation that is needed for agency is absent. Institutionalized cultural norms and expectations of women as child-bearers hinder the individual questions of whether or why motherhood may be desirable (Donath, 2015). For some women, motherhood is not desirable and entails a loss of agency (Donath, 2015). The regret towards motherhood that some women develop, however, is interpreted by Donath (2015) as a form of “after the fact” agency.

         The formation of regret, according to Donath (2015), involves self-reflection, awareness of different choices, and an evaluation of alternative outcomes. As such, the act of regret entails active contemplation and participation in creating one’s reality, which allows women to regain a form of agency as mothers. Although Donath’s study focuses on Israeli-Jewish women, she calls attention to the general role of societal expectations of motherhood in hindering women’s agency.  This lack of agency can also be characterized as a lack of power, which can be further explored through a discussion of privilege and oppression in relation to motherhood.

         Privilege and oppression are fundamentally linked concepts that explain the power dynamics in society (Launius & Hassel, 2015). Privilege serves to create a dominant, powerful group that becomes the standardized norm (Launius & Hassel, 2015). Those who do not fit the norm become an oppressed group that is marginalized and less powerful as a result of being compared to the privileged group (Launius & Hassel, 2015). As such, privilege and oppression are two sides of the same power coin; you cannot have one without the other. Privilege, more specifically, is the set of benefits, advantages, and power possessed by those in the dominant group that is only possible the existence of a contrasting, marginalized group (Launius & Hassel, 2015). Privilege may be unknown or unwanted by the beholder (Launius & Hassel, 2015).

         Bass’s (2015) examination of gender differences in the process of interpreting and preparing for parenthood exemplifies the privilege disparity between men and women when it comes to work and family expectations. In-depth interviews with childless and coupled young adults revealed that socially constructed gender expectations surrounding parenthood caused women to disproportionately experience feelings of worry and anxiety relating to anticipated motherhood (Bass, 2015). These emotional consequences manifested into behavioral consequences that included deferring educational opportunity and sacrificing preferences for job advancement (Bass, 2015). The women in the study internalized cultural expectations about motherhood that say women should be the primary caregivers who prioritize the family and invest a great deal of emotion into mothering (Bass, 2015). Men, on the other hand, did not experience the same emotional and behavioral consequences, by virtue of being a part of the dominant male group that is prescribed a gender role free from primary caregiver obligations.

         As a result of discrepancies in socially constructed gender expectations, women are being oppressed by a lack of agency in balancing family and career aspirations while men are being privileged with a lack of mental and emotional burden regarding parenthood. To better understand the oppression that women face in relation to motherhood, the macro, socio-structural level of ideologies and institutions must be considered.

         Oppression, in general terms, involves ideologies and social institutions that serve to create prejudice and discrimination towards a particular marginalized group of society that counters the dominant group (Launius & Hassel, 2015).  Traits that are infused with cultural meaning and are embodied by a dominant group become tools used to diminish the advantages and power of groups that do not fit these cultural norms (Launius & Hassel, 2015). In her analysis of women’s lived experience of motherhood, Sharp (2017) frames the family as an unjust institution that is the foundational structure of hierarchical dominance (Sharp, 2017). She calls attention to the systematic character of the distinct segregation of family roles as indication of the structural oppression of women (Sharp, 2017).

         The ideology of women as the primary caregivers of children is argued by Sharp (2017) as the driving force behind the discrimination that is the confinement and obscurity of women’s lives within the domestic sphere. By obscurity, Sharp (2017) means the state of being insignificant, inconspicuous, and out of tune with one’s self-identity. This institutionalized obscurity leaves mothers to exist in a liminal, in-between space where they put other’s needs before their own and leave their lives on hold (Sharp 2017). Sharp suggests reframing obscurity, however, to be a state in which a mother can “discover and recognize their own sense of self and rather than existing as a peripheral protagonist she can become the central character to her own story” (Sharp, 2015, p. 270).  The importance of acknowledging and accounting for the unique identities of women is an important theme in the final foundational concept of intersectionality.

         Intersectionality is both a theoretical framework and analytical approach that seeks to understand systems of privilege and oppression by taking into account how micro-level categories of identity (i.e. race, sexuality, class, age, etc.) simultaneously intersect to influence both the individual and macro, social-structural level (i.e. racism, sexism, heterosexism, etc.) experiences of women (Launius & Hassel, 2015). An intersectional feminist lens asks not only “What about women?” but “Which women?” to understand the nuanced lived experience of motherhood.

         Marriage status, as a micro-level identity that addresses the “Which women” question, intersects with work status and socioeconomic class to create a distinct experience of motherhood for single mothers. The uniqueness of single motherhood is captured in the Parents magazine article titled “Surviving (and thriving) as a single mom: Four common challenges and how you can overcome them.” Unlike the coupled women in Bass’s (2015) study who anticipated sacrificing their preferences for job and educational advancement in order to fulfill their gendered expectation of being the primary caregiver, this article presents single mothers who view job advancement and a stable work status as an important means by which to fulfill their roles as mothers (Sarah, n.d.). This distinctive mindset is exemplified in the article by a single mother’s quote who works full-time at a healthcare organization: "The best thing I can do for my daughter is show her how to be a strong, resourceful individual,"…. "I've found an incredible source of independence and strength through this situation” (Sarah, n.d.).

         A true intersectional approach to understanding the nuanced experiences of motherhood requires exploring the macro, social-structural level in addition to the micro-level identities. As Keogh (2013) calls attention to in her Herizons magazine article entitled “The blame game: It’s time to shatter the perfect-mother myth,” there are socio-structural issues that women face as mothers and intersectionality asserts that these issues are affected by micro-level identities, such as marriage status. The socio-structural issues listed include “family-unfriendly workplaces, the lack of affordable quality daycare, and a lack of better public policies to support motherhood” (Keogh, 2013, p. 23). Consideration of these macro-level factors explains why not all women may find independence and strength as a single mother.

         As the examples presented suggest, internalized binary gender ideals dictate what women should value as mothers, but there are many micro- and macro-level factors at play that affect women’s experiences as mothers. Mother’s lived experiences within the binary matrix, which shapes daily gendered experiences, behaviors, attitudes, and beliefs, can be best understood by applying the foundational concepts of the social construction of gender, agency, privilege, oppression, and intersectionality. To fully understand the complexity of the issues that women face in relation to motherhood, work, and emotional health, these foundational concepts must be utilized simultaneously and in connection with one another.  By viewing and thinking of motherhood through the lens of these foundational concepts, women’s advocates may be one step closer to enabling women to construct their own ideals of good motherhood so that their work aspirations and emotional health do not suffer.

                                                     Works Cited

Bass, B.C. (2015). Preparing for parenthood: Gender, aspirations, and the 

        reproduction of labor market inequality. Gender & Society, 29(3), 362-385. 

        doi: 10.1177/0891243214546936.

Donath, O. (2015). Choosing motherhood? Agency and regret within 

        reproduction and mothering retrospective accounts. Women’s Studies 

        International Forum, 53, 200-209. doi: 10.1016/j.wsif.2014.10.023.

Foss, S.K., Domenico, M.E., Foss, K.A. (2013). Gender Stories: Negotiating 

        identity in a binary world. Long Grove, IL: Waveland Press.

Keogh, J. (2013). The blame game: It’s time to shatter the perfect-mother myth. 

        Herizons, 27(2), 20- 23.

Launius, C., Hassel, H. (2015). Threshold concepts in women’s and gender 

        studies: Ways of seeing, thinking, and knowing. New York, NY: Taylor & 

        Francis.

O’Reiley, A. (2016). We need to talk about patriarchal motherhood: 

        essentialization, naturalization, and idealization in Lionel Shriver’s We need 

        to talk about Kevin. Journal of the Motherhood Initiative for Research & 

        Community Involvement, 7(1), 64-81. Doi: 10.1016/j.whi.2013.12.001.

Sarah, R. (n.d.). Surviving (and thriving) as a single mom: Four common 

        challenges and how you can overcome them. Parents. Retrieved from 

        https://www.parents.com/parenting/dynamics/singleparenting/surviving-            

         and-thriving-as-a-single-mom/.

Sharp, B. (2017). Mother Rocks the Cradle and She Waits: Towards a Feminist 

        Theology of Obscurity. The Journal of the Britain & Ireland School of           

        Feminist Theology, 25(3), 257-272. doi:10.1177/0966735017695934.

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Gender and Sexuality Portfolio Post One: Introduction to Special Interest Topic of Motherhood

          As discussed in Gender Stories: Negotiating identity in a binary world, a gender binary system exists in our society, which appoints all people to one of two identities- male or female (Foss, Domenico, & Foss, 2013). The authors conceptualize the gender binary system as a matrix that serves as the backdrop for our daily gendered experiences, behaviors, attitudes, and beliefs. From our gender identity and gender expression, to our biological sex and attraction to others, the gender binary matrix functions as an ever-present and pervasive system that influences each of the different components of our gender, whether we are consciously aware of it or not. The gender binary not only restricts the number of gender identities and sets males and females as opposites, but it also creates a hierarchy in which one category is more valued than the other and suggests that the distinction between the categories is natural and inevitable (Foss, Domenico, & Foss, 2013).  Even more, the gender binary reinforces distinct, normative roles for men and women and prescribes binary ideals of appearance, behavior, and personality (Foss, Domenico, & Foss, 2013). Starting in childhood and continuing throughout adulthood, we face pressures to conform to this socially-constructed “reality” of gender that is based on norms that are oftentimes impractical and unattainable. For many, this results in a constant and futile struggle to reconcile one’s complex and evolving gender with constraining norms, such as the “mythical norm” of “white, thin, male, young, heterosexual, Christian, and financially secure” (Launius & Hassel, 2015, p. 73). These gender norms are endorsed by the gender binary matrix yet are not necessarily enabled by it, given the complex intersection of gender with other micro-level identities (race, sexuality, class, age, etc.) and macro-level institutions (government and legal agencies, media, marriage structures, religion, educational institutions, etc.).

         Through personal reflection on the gender binary matrix and the way it has influenced my behaviors and beliefs as an adult, I have identified motherhood as a special interest topic within the study of gender and sexuality due to the influence that my conceptualization of “motherhood” has had on my prospective career choices. I classify myself as a young, heterosexual, female minority of Hispanic ethnicity and low socioeconomic family background. Unlike many women of a similar ethnicity and socioeconomic status, I have been privileged to pursue a college education and I am now among the limited number of women who have the opportunity to pursue higher education and a well-established career. Specifically, I am an aspiring physician who envisions using an obstetrics and gynecology specialty to practice humanistic medicine that empowers disadvantaged women with the knowledge, support, and medical treatment that they need to take control of their health. Whether it comes to intellectual capabilities, passion, or the physical stamina and mental strength that is needed for this career, there is nothing that says I am not fit to pursue this career. On the contrary, I believe that my minority and low socioeconomic family status, Spanish ethnicity, exposure to substance abuse and mental health issues, and experience with public health work has equipped me with valuable competencies regarding the complexity of health that make me exceptionally well suited to pursue a career in medicine. Yet, in making my career choices, the seemingly impending challenge of motherhood almost served to dissuade me from choosing a profession that I feel is truly my vocational calling. I am 21 years old, have yet to commence medical school (let alone meet a suitable partner), and I am already feeling pressure to prepare myself to balance my career with the responsibility of caring for a family and living up to the idealized expectations of a mother who is selfless, devoted, and the primary caregiver to her children. This pressure, and my previously unconscious connection between womanhood and motherhood, is the gender binary matrix at play. It is the unwarranted, yet internalized sense of binary gender ideals that dictates what I should value in life as a woman. This reflection has sparked my interest in exploring the intersection between gender studies and motherhood to better understand my own gender experience and the experience of the women that I hope to one day serve as an obstetrician/gynecologist.

         I began my review of the gender studies literature by using search terms such as “shame,” “pressure,” and “career” in conjunction with “motherhood.” Each search received between 4 and 29 results- “shame” having the least results and “career” having the most. A wide range of approaches to studying the challenges of womanhood and motherhood were presented. More specifically, the research questions centered around understanding how binary ideals for women and motherhood affected either 1) their individual mental and general health outcomes or 2) their career outlooks and expectations. The methodologies included surveys with a snowball sampling technique, cross-sectional study surveys, in-depth and semi-structured interviews, and analysis of online comments through feminist, discursive lens. Overall, the results showed the importance of assessing both micro- and macro-level influences on women’s gendered experience in order to create social policies that effectively enable women to have autonomy over their gendered experience. Many authors called for further studies addressing how women’s micro- and macro-level influences interact. With a few exceptions, most of the authors were females associated with academic institutions. Applying an intersectional feminist lens (which seeks to understand how women’s various identities intersect to influence their individual and institutional level experiences) to my own analysis of the literature, the articles can be compared and contrasted according to how they addressed the questions of “What about women?” and “Which women?” in relation to motherhood (Launius & Hassel, 2015).

         To address the question “What about women?” (i.e. what are women experiencing) with regards to motherhood, several authors acknowledged the socio-cultural context that has created a gendered nature of parenting where women carry the primary responsibility of caring for the home and children (Blithe, 2017; Crofts & Coffey, 2017; Dow 2016; Henderson, Harmon, & Newman, 2017; Watt & McIntosh, 2012). This gendered pressure experienced by mothers (and not by fathers) influences women’s work and family decisions. Although the authors acknowledge that social changes, such as the women’s right movement of the 1960s and 1970s, have granted women agency in the public sphere, they continually note that women face cultural contradictions between the public, work sphere and the private, home sphere (Crofts & Coffey, 2017; Dow 2016; Henderson, Harmon, & Newman, 2017; Watt & McIntosh, 2012). The economic need for families to have dual incomes in our contemporary U.S. capitalist culture, and the expectation that women be fully dedicated to their employment, conflicts with the expectation that women be intensive mothers who prioritize parenting and commit to caring for the family (Crofts & Coffey, 2017; Dow 2016; Henderson, Harmon, & Newman, 2017; Watt & McIntosh, 2012). Two approaches were taken to examine the effects of the binary ideologies and cultural contradictions revolving motherhood—the authors I assessed studied either 1) the mental health effects of the impractical binary expectations (Henderson, Harmon, & Newman, 2017; Taylor & Wallace, 2012; Witvliet, Arah, Stronks, & Kunst, 2014) or 2) the consequences of the cultural contradictions in relation to women’s careers and public sphere expectations (Blithe, 2017; Crofts & Coffey, 2017; Dow 2016; Hoffman, 2017; Jacques & Radtke, 2012; Mariskind, 2017; Watt & McIntosh, 2012). Henderson, Harmon, and Newman (2017) employed a feminist sociology perspective to do a macro-level analysis of how the intensive mothering ideologies and the resulting pressure to be a perfect mother adversely affect the mental health outcomes of women. They found that the “perfect mother” ideology resulted in negative mental health outcomes (such as stress, anxiety, guilt, and low self-efficacy) for all mothers studied, regardless of whether or not the mothers bought into the ideology. This research highlighted the importance of looking at the macro-level of dominant ideologies and helped to reframe idealized motherhood as a public social issue and not a personal choice (Henderson, Harmon, & Newman, 2017).  The theme of balancing macro-level analysis with micro-level analysis was also found throughout the literature that focused on the consequences of cultural contradictions in relation to women’s careers and public sphere expectations.

          Although all of the authors I reviewed sought to understand women’s challenges with motherhood by asking about what women are experiencing, only a few tried to understand the nuanced lived experience of idealized motherhood by asking “Which women?”. Contrary to Henderson, Harmon, and Newman (2017), Dow (2016) found that the same binary mothering ideologies do not influence all women. Dow’s research showed that cultural expectations among African American mothers combine with structural and economic constraints to form the foundation of an alternate ideology of mothering that frames how women make decisions regarding motherhood (Dow, 2016). Dow connected a micro-level analysis of race with a macro-level analysis of ideology. Similarly, Hoffman (2017) asked “Which women?” by employing a micro-level analysis of class and its intersection with work and motherhood. Like Mariskind (2017), Hoffman’s (2017) research also focused on assessing and enabling parental leave policies that help women deal with the transition to motherhood. Paid parental leave policies, although scarce in the U.S., can provide a way for mothers to integrate their roles as both workers and caregivers (Mariskind, 2017). In assessing the association between self-assessed general health in women, motherhood, and gender inequality, Witvliet, Arah, Stronks, and Kunst (2014) chose to include a micro-level analysis of the role of marriage status and found that lone mothers reported the highest odds of poor general health. Age, as a micro-level identity, was assessed by Crofts and Coffey (2017), as well as Jacques and Radtke (2012). Their research focused on young women and their internalization of cultural ideals of womanhood in light of the post-feminist and neoliberal discourses of autonomy and individualism (Crofts & Coffey, 2017; Jacques & Radtke, 2012). Both studies found that young women are still aware of and feeling pressured by hegemonic motherhood ideologies, despite identification with the post-feminist and neoliberal discourses of “choice” (Crofts & Coffey 2017; Jacques & Radtke, 2012). The continued presence of hegemonic motherhood ideologies is framed as a major obstacle to achieving gender equality in the workplace.

          Although significant strides have been made with women’s rights movements during the last two centuries, a gender binary matrix still exists and creates hegemonic ideologies that influence women’s work and family decisions. Women face a society that tells them that womanhood and motherhood are one in the same. They are expected to take on the responsibility of balancing their public and private spheres, but are set up for failure given the unrealistic and contradicting cultural expectations between their work and home lives. Contemporary women are told to “do it all”-- be loyal and committed to your work but prioritize motherhood and be a selfless and devoted caregiver. Women even pressure one another to “have it all,” while propagating a facade of “choice” in the matter.  The results are adverse personal health outcomes and gender inequality in the workforce. To move forward with addressing these issues, idealized motherhood must be reframed as a public social issue and not a “personal choice”. There are complex interactions between micro-level identities (such as race, nationality, class, age etc.) and macro-level ideologies and structural institutions that need to be further studied to understand women’s challenges with motherhood. By further exploring the topic of motherhood in gender studies, I hope to learn more about the micro- and macro-influences in women’s lives and how this knowledge may be applied to enable women to construct their own ideals of good motherhood.  

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