vermiliondrug

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me: *complains about something is complicated when haven't even made an effort to try it out*

me: fuck it, i'll try it out *actually manages to make it work and get a basic understanding how it all works*

i is this,, how it dopamine feels like,...?

my semi-annual complaint about wanting to make my own IF, but fail to get started because I am way too clueless to get and understand coding in general without getting my brain fried.

#tbh i was like ok i will try it again because i tried to use twine and read up on some codes #but i understood literally zero of what was being explained and its all math in my head jkdfhjkld #but then i tried later after getting something to drink and food and its like it worked nstantly? #I still need to do a lot of practice and get the proper gist of all the fancy codes i could need to make that IF lol #but now that i finally get it it feels good!!!!!

[vermiliondrug]

my semi-annual complaint about wanting to make my own IF, but fail to get started because I am way too clueless to get and understand coding in general without getting my brain fried.

#I tend to choose the wrong time to do it but #it frustrates me!!! #i wish it could be one of those block programming thingies so I dont have to do all the hard work #but alas! #honestly i just need to sit down and properly get into it #but i often make it too complicated in my head and need a proper visual reference for what a certain code do to make a certain function wor #rather than read texts that explains what they do 🤡 #storywise and contentwise I think I have everything its just the coding damnit

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I just get excited by Mass Effect, what can I do.

(prints)

#Mass Effect #q

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#crows are precious #i want a crow friend too #q

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me: I’m going to write a fic to my own entertainment

also me, writing said fic:

#q

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The feeling of not feeling good enough no matter what you do sucks. Career wise, art wise, parent wise...

Imposter syndrome is kicking me hard, even when I know whatever I feel is not true, but it doesn't quite help when it feels like you've been proven that what you fear *is* true, or at least given you the idea it might be true.

#Don't mind me 🥲 #Just being in a rough spot and not sure how to feel #At least when mini is asleep I spend every second playing Stardew Valley as well as this IF I wanted to play #I want to work on my book as well so low key considering writing when everything else sucks

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New Stardew Valley update is out, that means I will only hyperfocus on this for the next many weeks

#i should do fanart #i should finish that damned fic #i freaking love this game

[vermiliondrug]

I want to play a new game I haven't played before, but the new update for Stardew Valley is coming out on the 19th and I need to be emotionally, mentally and physically prepared so that I can be fully comitted and not play anything else for the next weeks as I try to 100% it.

#I am legit considering dusting off that fic I was writing because I did so much work and planning to it #but didn't get to finish it at all lol #but then should i post it online for all to see my embarassing writing sdjhfashdflas

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Steam’s little corner notifications when a friend launches a game are so fucking useless and i hope they never get rid of them. yes, please let me know that the kid i met on a maplestory forum in middle school and haven’t spoken to in a decade is playing Train Simulator

#q

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How do I get money to get commissions

I hear the Fighter’s Guild is recruiting. Not a bad way to make some money… if you’ve got the stones for it…

#q

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ATTENTION ARTISTS OF TUMBLR

since tumblr is going to start scraping blogs to train ai be sure to glaze and nightshade your art!! Not only will both of these programs protect your art from being copied but nightshade also poisons any ai that tries to steal it

here is some more info on these tools and where you can download them:

Nightshade: Protecting Copyright (uchicago.edu)

Nightshade: Downloads (uchicago.edu)

Glaze - What is Glaze (uchicago.edu)

Glaze - Downloads (uchicago.edu)

#oh ffs #is there any point in posting art online anymore when its not safe anywhere

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#baldur's gate 3 #q

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Playing Persona 3 Reload is super fun because I enjnoy finally seeing everyone in 3D!! (I've only played Portable), but you just blissfully ignore the fact that the game is going to make you freaking cry.

Also clinging to the stupid hope that Atlus will make a DLC with FeMC, but I know it will never happen. 🥲

#stop being COWARDS atlus #you made the feMC route so h0rnby and literally give every character more depth and even better replayability to the game #like I would rather dig myself underground than farm Tartarus all over again #but I'd gladly do it again in a NG+ with femMC ok #atlus say no fun allowed and continue to make spin off games for P5 altho i love P5 #but please!!! i want to see the super sweet but awkward romance scenes 😭

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Mass Destruction

#persona 3 #q

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I also did these Chibis when I worked on the sketches of Wyll and Philo but wanted to post them seperately.

#baldurs gate 3 #wyll ravengard #tav #your tav is so cute! love the tiny hearts in her eyes ❤️‍🔥

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Some sketches of my BG3 OC Philomena and Wyll ♥

Philo is part of Melwen's story too. She stayed at the Grove where she quickly developed a crush on Wyll after meeting him. After the party saves the Tieflings, Philo stays with them as a healer in camp.

#baldurs gate 3 #wyll #tav #ooo they're so cute?? #andthe dancing scene too 😭

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saw a tiktok of a mother taking her very tiny daughter to an art museum and she’s just walking around going “whoooa” “woooaah” to everything but then they got to a marble statue of a nude woman lying on her back and the girl points and goes “mommy🫵” and i just immediately welled up with tears and all the comments are just laughing about it and of course it’s funny but how are you not insanely moved by the way art connects everyone on earth from a centuries-old sculptor to a toddler in 2023

#ok i love this #but it also made me think of my daughter pointing at a flounder on tv and then looked at her dad saying “dada” lsdhfahfs #q