toughnuttoswallow

[toughnuttoswallow]

I think "they don't even have X" is one of those memes that's actually funnier in its original context than in anything that's been done with it subsequently. Like, in its original context, this is a joke about a man who has lived his entire adult life alone in a swamp cold-reading the atmosphere of a corporate workplace and deciding that appealing to the receptionist's sense of working-class solidarity is going to get him in the door, and it fucking works.

#they dont even have dental... 😒

[toughnuttoswallow]

good to know you think a catholic saying a homophobic slur is funny

If some old bitch in wizard robes calls me a faggot im laughing at them lol.

[toughnuttoswallow]

Taking my cat to the vet for the first time and she is breaking my heart she does not like the carrier 😭😭

#im sorry girl u just have a cough #im not returning u i swear u just need medicine 😭😭😭

[toughnuttoswallow]

sorry guys i became a hoyoverse fan

#hell yeag #thats my son #yanqing #honkai star rail

[toughnuttoswallow]

horribly cursed fact of the day:

the description of nathan wesninski in baltimore in the king's men is the ONLY APPEARANCE OF THE WORD "BAREFOOT" IN ALL FOUR AFTG BOOKS

i think about it way too much. nora. nora. WHY is nathan barefoot. WHY.

like honestly it says a lot about him. he walked into his cellar no socks no shoes rawdogging the concrete

brother died with dust in between his toesies. i bet the soles of his feet were dirty as hell.

like he couldn't have put on some slippers? a pair of socks? some flip flops even. nah he went down there to kill his son with his Dogs Out

#what if he wore crocs with cute little charms #“hollup before we kill him let me put these bad boys in sport mode”

[toughnuttoswallow]

the thing that gave you anxiety attacks for 2 years straight will be resolved on a random Wednesday morning btw

[toughnuttoswallow]

[toughnuttoswallow]

I would still use my turn signals in the Mad Max Wasteland. They'd call me "Signal" because I'd hit my blinker before ramming the enemy hot rods into the side of a desert ravine. I'd use my turn signal every time. They would respect me for this.

[toughnuttoswallow]

"he would not fucking say that" but about injuries. he would not fucking recover that quickly. those scars would not fucking heal like that. he would not be fucking able bodied after that. he would not be fully lucid after that.

#the fresh out the womb infant did not gaze lovingly into his mothers eyes and giggle

[toughnuttoswallow]

Shenhe My Absolute Beloved <3

#genshin impact

[toughnuttoswallow]

deadbeat tumblr mutual

[toughnuttoswallow]

[toughnuttoswallow]

when did we as a society start allowing a sandwich to cost sixteen dollars? eighteen? I know I've paid twenty-one dollars for a sandwich at this point. is this just the world now? sandwich prices don't come down like gas prices. they go up & up & up. good luck to us all

[toughnuttoswallow]

i need to know every language immediately

[toughnuttoswallow]

[toughnuttoswallow]

um … compilation

#mulch maxxed

[toughnuttoswallow]

what do you think would happen if ratio and argenti met