topconfessions

[topconfessions]

hii I’m not sure if this is bc it’s just a well known fact in the fandom since I only began following big bang like 2 years ago so I’m sorry if you’ve already answered this but how come you think gdragon n t.o.p dislike each other?? like based on the past videos I saw on them I though the members (except from seungri) were still somewhat close? and do you think Daesung n taeyang are still close to t.o.p?

Contracts and lack of connection in personal life. Top and GD buttheads alot over direction of the projects. On top of that, they have different social circles and they changed as people separately. Top distances himself from them personally anyway. No they are not close to Top like that anymore. On speaking terms and visiting but that's it.

Top is on his own and is not tight knit with them anymore. I'm sorry hun. They will however meet up again if they have to but it's not what they tell you it is.

[topconfessions]

Ok I can understand if you don’t want to answer this question as it’s very loaded but I feel you’d be the type to have a mature opinion on it. So it’s completely unrelated to kpop but anyway what’s your opinion on the allegations against MJ? As a longtime fan I always assumed he was innocent but recently I’ve been reading about the accusations and I’m starting to think there may be some truth to it, I hope I’m wrong though.

He was innocent but had an undiagnosed chronic psychiatric illness. He was severely mentally ill and because he came up in a time where mental health resources didnt exist nor was respected, promoted or shared, if you had mental issues to the point to the point where it manifests like Michael, you were held accountable in a henious manner for it. I think people today want to blindly rewrite history or forget (unless you're young) that bring mentally ill was a death sentence up till 2010.

Someone like Michael today couldn't get far in the industry being this different and off putting cause his oddities would've been presented to him in his face excessively in both positive and negative manners. He was clearly in frueds adolescent stage of development mentally and his mental illness is just as severe as schizophrenia. I'm sorry but that's just the truth.

There Is no truth to it. Michael was physically abused by the FBI agents and he was investigated rigorously for 17 years and his entire home was raided with extensive files kept on every aspect of his life, he was monitored as well. He did have an inappropriate socializing relationship with children in terms of boundaries but again this is because he had a severe mental illness and I put his illness up there with Disassociative identity disorder or schizophrenia.

No one confronted Michael about being this mentally warped and unwell cause he was too powerful and beneficial in his ill state to people who needed money from him to do it. If beyonce had this same sort of issue or oddity, everyone would be rushing to tell her to face at some point that they think she needs to get diagnosed and she would be shipped off to get psychiatric treatment with it framed as "rehab".

Also please research again cause he was lied on and the story was a lie, the details changed several times and Chris tucker warned Michael to leave certain families alone cause of family that targeted Michael tried to target him and he got used by them himself. Michael was a people pleaser and couldn't say no so that one kid who accused him, Michael befriended him in the first place cause his mother kept calling him blowing him up during the bad tour begging Michael to take her son and let him go on the tour with him after they filmed a commercial project together. Michael tried to ignore the calls several times but let the kid come along.

Michael lacked professional boundaries and was too personable with people. That could never happen today cause you need to go through publicists, PR team, lawyers, representatives and the such. Michael had deep rooted issues that would've taken his whole life up to his 70s heal if he lived. A long term work in progress.

Also please understand that Michael was statically the most famous person on earth after Jesus christ, princess Diana, and Elvis. In that order. He had a rare freedom to live the way he wanted to to the point that it defied logic cause he was a billionaire and at the top plus he was extremely mentally ill with no treatment or awareness of it so he lacked the ability to have mature social and self awareness of how he differed from others.

As far as the literal big question of if he did it or not, no. He didn't. he wouldn't have made it past 40 if he did. That's just a fact. Also I always got the impression from him he would commit suicide in some way or pay for voluntarily suicide and have it marked off as a plastic surgery related death if he was guilty. I'm still amazed he lived till 50 with his type of life cause anyone else wouldn't be able to make it to that age.

He is innocent but his extreme poor decisions and extreme way of living and mental illness illicit feelings of him being guilty cause people can't stomach how he got away with living in such a unique circumstance and not caring enough to conform to the expectations or society.

Michael having this issue kept a lot of people safe. Jay Z and Beyonce wouldn't have half the assets and businesses they have and Sony would just be broken up into a cluster of shares if Michael had the normal intellect of a regular grown man. Deep down I can feel everyone knows they're lucky Michael was mentally stunted and difficult.

He didn't do it.

He really didn't.

Also I'd like to know how old you are and how much you know about MJ cause I notice people under 27-30 usually have this consensus about him.

[topconfessions]

Why do you think TOPs girlfriends leave him? Also, do you think he is dating Miyu?

cause he's very complex and not so much the emotionally attached type plus the age differences since he likes younger girls. No he isn't dating Miyu, that would've been cute though.

[topconfessions]

https://twitter.com/Koreaboo/status/1756293196425077158?t=5su3AWqwu3qPGr_2ZzsR3Q&s=19

LMAO The lies, delusion, and utter audacity on display here. JK is a great artist but to say he is the "21st century Michael Jackson" is insane. Also! Its super hypocritical! ARMY doesn't like hearing people say that group whatever is "the next BTS" yet they eat up JK being called "the modern MJ". Ridiculous.

.......now why are they throwing him under the bus like that? I'd like to believe that goes to chris brown respectfully. I can see Taemin coming before JK closer to MJ. Taemin just has a certain perfection to his craft that's hard to master. JK is amazing though but let him be "the JK" and not a copy of anyone else. chileee

[topconfessions]

did you saw the news about Cassie?? She literally show everything we talked about the industry is true, including the multiples time Diddy killed people and make them look like suicide, shady shit all around

I've been watching and paying attention since it all first broke as well as the mega fast settlement diddy did with her, the fastest settlement for abuse / rape I've ever seen, not even a week went by and he settled financially. Did you see the video of her hiding from after he beat her up? she was curled up in a blanketed covering her entire body and face on the floor trying to scoot away from her bundled up. it was so sad and alarming to see. he's a predator and I also believe he hyped up the beef between biggie x pac and is partly behind Biggie's murder. He's a groomer and abuser. He beat cassie then made his assistants go shopping for 25K in gifts then give them to her after he beat her up to keep her from leaving, THEN snatched her off the street when she tried to leave.

it's all true. he's a demon. praying for her safety.

[topconfessions]

Top said he’s making a documentary film with his album. What do you think it will be about and do you think he’ll ever talk about Ri’s scandal and what went down with the group in it?

His journey coming into himself and his passions he's developed along the way. I'm not sure if art will be involved but he may include that. This explains why it's taking so long and I hope it's good quality. we can wait a little longer then. :/ I think he will avoid most of it and focus on OT4.

[topconfessions]

It’s funny to see how he has been obsessed with the Moon project even it seems like gonna take more than 2 years to achieve Bahaha btw did you see the photos he took with Nawa? Someone asked me if he’s dating with somebody again haha do you have any relevant info of this?

He's not with nawla and isn't dating too seriously at the moment. I'm waiting to see what happens and staying vigilant. But I know! This is why a lot of us feel he is getting his hopes up. He needs to focus on promoting Squid game and be as hyped about this as he was about Tazza 2 back in the day. Again, I love him down but I bump his old music daily but it's giving "I only care to do promo if I feel it elevates my stock".

[topconfessions]

Reading the anon’s opinion about the moon trip and it’s so weird cause I was going to send in a really similar confession but decided not to cause I didn’t want to be negative about something that’s making him so happy especially after these turbulent years where he was struggling so much. Also I get what you’re saying 100%. As we all know he’s a sensitive soul and I’m worried that if something delays this trip or anything else means it doesn’t run as smoothly as planned he’ll be wrecked. I’ve noticed that top appears to hyperfixate on things like if you go to his ig 99% of his posts are about the moon. Now this is cute and I’m sure I speak for many fans when I say I’m so pleased he’s found something that brings him happiness but at the same time I’m worried. There’s still no definitive time the launching will take place but he’s out there posting a million stories about it am and pm. I’m hoping it all goes well, I truly do, he deserves it but I think he should also try and distract himself with other things e.g. an album. I mean maybe he’s doing that in his personal life but his ig sure doesn’t suggest that lol

P.S. I just want to say after seeing how obsessed top is with the moon trip I’m starting to think he didn’t necessarily have a major falling out with gd. Maybe it’s his personality to get so absorbed in a particular passion that he starts ignoring or shutting out people who aren’t connected to his latest interest. Like look at the still life mv, even his part was about the moon. This all makes me wonder if he’s slightly neurodivergent tbh and I don’t mean that as an insult just to be clear.

sometimes, what you love and what makes you happy isn't what's best for you or most beneficial. Yeah, I unfollowed him long ago cause of it because it became exhilarating to me and too much. There is promotion and excitement then there is just excessive posting and fixation that isn't needed. He should focus on the acting project and hyping squid game up, posting things in relation to that. I'm starting to think that he doesnt have a core enduring interest in anything aside from the wine that doesn't elevate his self worth publicly notoriety wise. I think he isn't rushing to be passionate about anything if it isn't elevating himself somehow, but I'm sure he is genuinely into this trip.

I MEANNNNN I am the same way too, I had a friend frantically hit me up recently acting like I was missing just cause I hadn't talked to her in some weeks and wasn't posting on social media when I was staying to myself and focusing on one of my hobbies I was really into. So I get it, like your point, but I still think him and GD had a genuine falling out anyway.

As for the neuro speculation, we've already discussed many times here we collectively believe TOP (our speculation, our opinion, our *THEORY*, not fact*) is on the spectrum.

[topconfessions]

I feel you on wanting TOP in a lead roll but honestly I think he needs more experience acting to get to that point. Like yeah he might be able to land a lead roll based on connections but that doesn't mean he would necessarily do well in the roll. And not doing well in a lead roll would just emphasize that he got the part for his connections not talent. Which in the end would really just look kind of bad.

I agree, yet what you just said is the primary issue and problem. If he doesn't have enough acting experience to get a lead roll or one of the top 5 competitors who at least last towards the near end in the show, then that means he doesn't have enough experience or merit to even be in squid game in the first place - thus got the role just through name sake and networking. no difference than how ryan gosling got barbie cause the director wanted it for him and gave it to him, he didn't have to audition for it. Happens all the time.

yeah, I agree fully. I know he isn't qualified but he shouldnt take on these roles cause in the same respect, unless his character becomes a fan favorite and offers something sly or compelling (or is carried by the lead guy) it's going to be more type casting where he gets roles where his character "dies" for some unjust cause.

[topconfessions]

It’s interesting that if you look at the comments under his posts u’ll find more and more people are asking his album things LOL I’ve seen one of fans leaving a long comment to him talking about the surreal aspects of space travel and persuading him back to his own life… they care about him in a healthier way, not like Wendy, tbh now I feel sick when I saw Wendy called him astronaut it just helps strengthen his illusion but at this moment it’s much more important to focus on his real life Damn why he’s always surrounded by these toxic people

You see what I see. At least the fans are sensible and want something tangible from him. Nothing in life is completely impossible but he needs to be grounded and also practical in his goals. I don't want him to come crashing down emotionally if this doesn't take off the way he wants it too.

We'll see what happens but this is on Elon Musk and the Chinese billionaire sponsoring this.

[topconfessions]

Yeah I do think Gd may still dabble in drugs (not regularly obviously) but I hope top isn’t dumb enough to do that and isn’t influenced by any shitty friends in America, if he ever got caught again his career would be 100% over, no second chance.

100% no second chance if he got caught up again.

I'm sure he's smart and knows there is a time and place for everything. Either do it outside of Korea and keep yourself clean of messy people when going back to Korea.

[topconfessions]

I know it’s crazy he’s never had an album, at least we are finally getting one but we still don’t know the release date which is so frustrating. I can’t tell if he’s just focusing on the moon trip and then will release it when it’s over. He’s doing a feature film thing along with the album apparently too so at some point we will be getting loads of content. Wow I had never heard of that or come across those videos but I guess that’s the standard for the entertainment industry, I shouldn’t be so shocked. What I don’t really get is why are they doing that in audition videos? Is it purely for pervy directors and producers? I pray top never had to do that sort of thing for his early acting roles but he was a famous idol by that time so maybe it would have been too risky for them to ask him to do that.

Btw is it true he’ll be playing an ex idol in squid game? That’s what I heard, it got me excited cause maybe we’ll see him rapping and singing in it! I feel the same way, if he dies after one episode I’ll be so exasperated but there’s still at least another year till it’s going to be released so we won’t know for a while sadly.

Most likely it is true. I think they should've given him a more serious role for the show and not an ex idol cause it'll just be him really tapping into himself and not so much acting, I want him in a role where he has something like one of the 3 leads. But I hope they do show some short skit where he is a rapper and aged out of the industry with a mountain of debt or his group didn't make the cut. Im hoping he makes it to the middle or the last 4. He's good friends with the lead so maybe he can get to last 4 if not 3.

Honey, the industry is tainted no matter what. It's not just for the sake of pervs, sex runs everything and its also an insurance on their end that they can leak at any point if the actor fucks up what they agreed to ad revenge. I'm 100% sure top never did that or had to.

[topconfessions]

TOP is 36 now why did he most likely prostitute himself to get an acting role. I don’t want to sound cruel but surely at his age he finds it humiliating or at the very least it’s not an enjoyable thing for him. He’s not in his 20s anymore I would think he’d feel used doing that as a grown man , treated like a piece of meat

Damn 36 already?!?! 36 and we still don't have a solo album from him....chile....

Lemme get up in here and hear this

This is all just speculation and opinions. We should all want the best for him and it's a sensieitivr subject matter. But I agree with you. I really feel he got squid, again, cause of who he is mainly. The sex part can also be true.

I'll never forget that scandal that was making waves In Korea and Netizeen buzz where that actor masturbation video leaked when in reality it was for casting purposes and he was instructed to do it. Don't ask how or why but I ran across other videos just like his from other Korean men in the industry on pornhub and the internet where they were dressed just like him in same underwear and doing the same mannerisms in the same order as him. So much so it seemed like an audition video and not a recording for a lover.

So it does happen in the acting industry and that's their version of the infamous casting couch in Hollywood.

After some time to rest on it I think this is now just a connections thing with one of those connections being someone he knew in that manner.

All I know is I'm gonna side eye if he gets nuked in the first round or first few. He better be like the girl who lasted till the near end, you hyo. He ALWAYS picks roles where his characters pass away at the end and dong make it, I don't like that. Tazza was cool and I'm hoping he brings some of that to the squid game.

[topconfessions]

About the ritual acts I do think there’s some truth to it. I mean there’s times I’ve looked at a celeb’s face when they’re performing and you can almost see something has taken over them. I’m sure some anons will be pissed at me saying this but I think gd may have been involved in that, not so sure about the rest, for some reason I don’t feel top did it on the same level as gd (if he did do it all).

Honestly, I completely agree with you though and I’m so glad I found someone I can discuss it with. I’ve never really spoken about these things with other vips or kpop fans in general cause they’ll say you’re crazy if you suggest there’s anything dark about the industry. I don’t know what it is about kpop fans but so many seem to think the kpop industry is free of any shady happenings. Like everyone accepts Hollywood is a seedy place full of evil people abusing their power but apparently kpop is as innocent as a candy store. This is just my two cents and I’ve never said it before but it’s my belief top (and maybe some other bb members like gd) had unpleasant experiences, to put it lightly, with a lot of creeps during their early years. Basically taking advantage of them when they were young and desperate to be successful. I’ve always had that feeling and I think this is partly what led to top’s issues and has given him these bitter feelings towards all the years he spent in the industry.

I think I forgot to mention drug usage is also a thing (not for everyone) cause it helps with that energy aspect believe it or not of getting through the performances and all the strain that comes along with it. It takes a lot of energy to get through those schedules and they usually have a lot packed in a day.

I don't believe top did it cause he's really fulfilled and happy in his life freedom wise although he has his issues like we all do. He seems more at terms where he is and wa ting to do all these things and GD is well bring GD as usual. Yeah kpop has a strict unspoken clear role of keeping an appearance and image treating its industry as a stage and strictly as that which I DO admire cause here in America they want you to be exactly what you do and put into your projects.

I'm sure top seen a lot of abuse and dealt with mistreatment that only went away once he got the big money

Like you can't be a Kurt Cobain personality doing music that doesn't match that personality. But a lot of people don't handle that separation well. Also Korea deals heavily with fan engagement in some ways America doesn't. It is weird though now that you say it. And YES I've seen it! Some of them do look like they're on auto pilot but I chalked it up to just focusing or tiredness.

I'm really into a lot of new groups these days so I pray for them.

[topconfessions]

Ok I had to search for ages to find the original post about top’s dad (it was on the vigilant citizen kpop thread ). That thread has loads of tea and rumours about different idols including bigbang. I just copied and pasted the interesting parts (the info is from quite a few years ago so hopefully he’s doing better now):

The part about his dad and mk ultra is brief:

With his dad it's either two ways or (maybe one?)

that his dad was beating his mom up or cheating on her and left her (if it isn't beating up or cheating he was just falling out with her and probably verbally abused her in front of TOP or around where TOP could hear as a kid). Or his father already has some leverage because he is a high ranking military official and has something to do with the MK Ultra thing. At first I wanted to say that his father was a sacrifice of some sort, but that's not an option.

overall his career is causing his mental health to go down further and further. So if anyone were to ever leave bigbang it would be him or Seungri first.

Last prediction is so interesting as seungri and top really were the first two to leave.

One user wrote this as well:

he is pecuilar but only because that is his brains way of going through his reality cause of how hurt he has been in his life. he is a really lonely guy with mental issues, father issues, and he is mentally like a teenager although he's like what 29-30? But GD is snake although they are friends cause he deadass talked TOP into posting half the stupid shit he did on instagram, a lot of his fake friends did, and top not having the best judgement did it and it made his image go down. He's not the best judge of character at all and YG wanted him to have a dating or marrying scandal around the time he had the scandal with the thot han seo hee. GD is most likely the one in BB who puts him up to that cause he is used to doing stunts and carrying about media attention and stuff along with YG, but that's not really TOP's alley. TOP had a lot of childhood issues and trauma within his mom and he loves his mom a lot but probably also cause his dad is out the picture and did something he wasn't supposed to do with further put that attachment 10x harder on his mother. Like that scar above his eye near his eyebrow I can't pin point exactly where he got it from but to my ability I'd say either from school kids, his father, or an accident involving his mother and father in an argument. His sister does not trust many women around him cause of messy women screwing him over in her eyes, she wants to protect him.

I think this is interesting especially nowadays after gd and top had their feud! I hope it’s not true but still…

Also I found this extra bit you might be interested in. I’m not sure if you’ve read the vigilant citizen thread but it basically discusses a lot of conspiracies one of which is celebrity sacrifices. I don’t know if you remember top’s concerning ig live a couple years ago but someone on the thread was saying they think he may be ‘sacrificed’ after that (users on the thread think some of the suicides in the kpop industry are sacrifices):

Personally, I think it will be Yeri from RedVelvet or Mina from AOA. My bet is on BigBang Top. You will know why if you watch his ig live. Pray for him

Either way even though a lot of us here criticise top it seems the industry was a toxic place to be and I’m glad he’s happier now, I hope he has true friends and has found peace.

I remember this.

It all makes a lot of sense.

And I do agree that alot of the suicides were not suicides but were sacrifices or they got killed off with it framed as a suicides. Sulli may be an organic suicide but I foul play with her too. Anyway, I know about vigilant citizen and it's been years since I've been that tea thread over there. I need to go back and look at it.

I remember many years ago someone posted (I can't exactly remember if it was directly from an insider or someone connected to an insider) that a pot of idols did participate in spellwork, mirror Magick, and using demon contracts to help them perform. Basically they would do their rituals before performing privately and the demonic influences would oblige by carrying most of the rigorous performance routines for them. I believe this personally cause everyone knows that while God or Jesus christ himself may not be real, demonic forces are. Too much evidence out there complied of artists like Beyonce, Nicki Minaj and Michael Jackson having alters that assist them in their career early on.

Nobody does it anymore but back in the day a lot of celebs used to say they have alter egos and turn into different people when performing. And sure I get exactly what they mean but it's become too clear to ignore.

I won't be responding to any backlash or anger if any anonymous want to bitch about it. This is all majorly speculation and if you think this sounds stupid, keep it as an opinion and keep it pushing by unfollowing cause arguing with me won't change a thing.

In general I didn't want to say it in the past ask but I think all of that is true. Potential abuse. But that's just my perspective. Not a fact I can prove.

[topconfessions]

The real question is this: is top a top or a bottom ;) ? What do u guess?

LMAOO. Bottom. He's a bottom for sure.

[topconfessions]

There’s been a lot of speculation as to why top isn’t close to BB anymore whilst gd, tae and dae still hang out. I do think part of it might have been gd and top having different views on YG and the direction of the group. But I partly wonder if it’s to do with the whole ot5/4 thing. Do you remember when top posted that cropped out pic of seungri with the caption I love my band and I love my fans? I mean at that point it seemed like he was all for an OT4 comeback so I’m starting to think maybe he and gd disagreed about something to do with seungri. Taeyang also seemed ready for an ot4 comeback tbh but I’m not sure about daesung. It’s like top doesn’t want to think about his past in Korea at all, he didn’t even go se7en’s wedding when the other three did even though they used to be super close.

Yep. You basically summed up what we've discussed on here before. Top has his own life and friends as well as interests. Again go back and look at that old interview he did when he started acting. He said YG is a work place and they aren't family. Also it's kinda been unofficially proven that him & GD had clashed over creative differences.

Top been done with seungri so that's no surprise.

It's just them not being the same people they used to be.