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Fauci’s Leaked Emails Reveal Frybread Recipe

WASHIINDON- Anthony Fauci’s, the director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases, emails were released earlier in June due to a Freedom of Information Act. Almost 700 pages of emails were released which revealed emails that ranged from conventional to annoyance. Fauci’s email correspondence illustrate how he was experiencing the frantic early days of the covid19 pandemic.

Unfounded conspiracy theories began to emerge from the emails such as Fauci’s knowledge of the effectiveness of hydroxychloroquine, the role of extraterrestrial aliens in the origins of the pandemic, and the use of wizardry in the vaccinations. 

What may surprise Navajo readers is the ongoing email thread between a Navajo politician about Navajo frybread recipe. Fauci’s emails revealed that he cherished the Navajo delicacy with sugar and honey. Frybread served as a comfort food for the director during the early days as he admitted to eating five frybreads a week. His communication with a Navajo politician revolved around the recipe and preparation of frybread. 

Staffers would confirm the emails by stating that Fauci’s office was sticky due to left over sugar and honey. Staffers would routinely seek Navajo federal workers to make frybread for the director. It became apparent to Navajo workers and staffers that Fauci was addicted. 

Yet he never learned the correct recipe of frybread and some emails hint that he attempted to cook it for himself but failed multiple times. He emailed asking for the proper preparation and cooking directions. The Navajo politician gave in and sent a zoom link to the director to teach the director. 

A recipe was found in the emails but it appears to be from google. 

#Navajo #Navajo Nation #Fauci #Native American #ndn #Indigenous #frybread

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Navajo DOJ Reveals that Kirk Invested In DogeCoin

WINDOW ROCK- In a recent memo by the Navajo Nation Department of Justice, McPool revealed that Pearline Kirk had used some of the covid19 monies to invest in the risky bitcoin, Dogecoin. Kirk has used an undisclosed amount of monies to invest in the bitcoin claiming that she was planning to “take Doge and the Navajo Nation to the moon”. The investment was caught when DOJ found some deleted emails titled, ‘łééchąąʼí beso”. 

The email title, ‘dog money’ or ‘shit pet money’, detailed how Kirk invested in the digital currency on behalf of the Navajo people. The bitcoin currency is immaterial but the infrastructure that makes it possible is from a large computer infrastructure that mines data. Some Navajo critics opposed the potential ‘data mining’ economy that might replace the current mining economy.

‘We have already dealt with coal mining, now we are suppose to be happy with data mining for fake beeso’ said one Navajo member. ‘Its based on an industry of computers and trading and these are all somehow considering how much humans are involved’.

The investment has become part of the many blockchain that is stored to record the transactions. The alternative currency is meant to be decentralized as opposed to the centralized monetary systems around the world. 

One Navajo economist stated that ‘bitcoins need to be in circulation to be alive, just like sheep’. ‘Sheep need to be monitored and watched by a sheepherder, the government’. ‘We need some regulation so the sheep don’t end up missing or stolen’.

The email thread between Kirk and the bitcoin investor showed that bitminer warned Kirk of the risks and rewards. Kirk argued that bitcoin was a new path for tribal development and sovereignty. 

She writes, ‘Tribal sovereignty is Hodl’. ‘We can never let go thus hold on for dear life’. ‘Our people need an alternative path of development that is not centralized or bound to fiat currencies’. ‘We had coal miners, now we need bit miners’.

We reached out to the Kirk for comment and she declined.

#Navajo #Navajo Nation #Indigenous #ndn #native american #Dinétah #news #bitcoin

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Prez Nez warns Navajos from Using Hardship Monies for Stock

WINDOW ROCK- After 120,000 hardship checks were sent out to Navajo citizens, Nez offers a cautionary note to folks who were interested in investment. In a town hall meeting, Nez told the virtual audience to use their money wisely and not to expect a “per-cap situation” in the future. Part of his address included warning Navajos from using their deserved monies for Gamestop stock.

“I know you will be tempted to get in on the stock excitement but I offer a warning for all those interested investing” he said directly to camera. “My brief experience with Gamestop includes buying and selling games to them at cheap prices and their presale promotions”. “I bought my first exercise game from there, the wii-fit”.

“Be careful with investing in their stock even though investors are unable to buy stock”.

Nez was addressing the Gamestop stock situation where it’s price soared with the help of redditors. The stock was being betted against by hedgefunders who were planning to make money with the companies demise but that all proved to be the opposite. 

“I know some Diné are stock savvy but I remind folks that the stock prices will eventually return to normal like the flee market prices of mutton sandwiches” he said. “I too dabbled in stocks and I lost the shirt off my back and decided to be a politicians”. 

Many Navajos in the attendance were thanking for the reminders and information about the situation. One audience member asked if the Navajo Nation would invest in a bitcoin project, Cheiicoin.

Nez let the audience know that his administration had plans for stock projects but the pandemic sidelined all of this avenues.

“We had plans to research tribal bitcoin and stock investments”. “My personal choice of names would’ve been Beesobit, Sihasincoin, and Hogancoin”.

#Navajo #Diné #diné bikeyah #Navajo politics #indigenous #native american #navajo nation

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Nephew Refuses Vaccination, Claiming to be F*cking Sick

SHEEP SPRINGS, NN- The Pfizer and Moderna vaccines have crossed over the Navajo Nation borders in the last few weeks. Tier One, for front line workers, was completed in late December and Tier two began two weeks ago. Navajo leaders were getting vaccinated and one citizen commented that it reminded them of the sheep dippings in the 1930s. The vaccine has made its way slowly to the Navajo people but many are hopeful for its spread.

“Watching the leaders line up for medicine like little sheep is cute” said Trish Yazzie. Mrs. Yazzie was excited for the vaccine due to the devastation caused by covid19. Many Navajo families felt the lost that was created by the pandemic. Some are healed and others are in the healing process.

Others are not so accepting of the new vaccine. Tlo’chi’iin reporters received notifications that a local nephew is refusing the vaccination. The local nephew claims that he is “f*cking sick” but does not need a vaccination that may alleviate any symptoms and raise immunity towards covid19.

“I’m f*cking sick and I will not get a vaccine” he said defiantly on the phone. “I’m not anti-vaxxer, I’m just f*cking sick” he replied to our questions. “I am well aware of the medical history of Indigenous peoples but I personally won’t get it cuz I’m f*cking sick”.

“Others can and should get it but not me cuz you know, I’m f*cking sick”.

Others see his stance as ridiculous but he did draw support from local anti-vaxxers. They agreed that more pressing issues were not eating enough vegetables, sun-bathing, and natural remedies such as crystal rubbing and herd immunity. They were last seen protesting the 5g towers in border-towns.

Tlo’chi’iin spoke to an expert on the cautious hesitancy towards the Medical field, Dr. Ivan Belogadie.

“There is a valid reason for Indigenous peoples to be cautious with medical authorities that are informed by historical injustices”, he said. “Forced sterilization of Indigenous peoples is a big reason why folks do not trust the medical authorities and I imagined countless of other abuses”.

“I’ve never heard of an Indigenous person refusing just because they are f*cking sick, that is new”.

Tlo’chi’iin reach again for further comments from the local nephew but he was unwilling to say more because he is too “f*cking sick” to give another interview. Navajo people are encouraged to the take the vaccine and continue socially distancing.

#Navajo #Navajo Nation #Diné #dinebikeyah #Dinétah #Indigenous #fucking sick #covid19 #vaccine #native american #ndn

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Navajos Participate in NoNut November to Spread Awareness about Allergies

TUBA CITY, Navajo Nation- As Navajos prepare for the election they have taken to social media to spread awareness about allergies in Native communities. Social media have been utilized to spread information and awareness about social justice, political platforms, and events. Many Navajos have used the #NoNutNovember to show solidarity with other Natives who are allergic to nuts.

Tlo’chi’iin spoke to Nez Roanhorse, who is also allergic to nuts, about the hashtag and movement.

“I have been allergic to nuts all my life” he said over the phone. “I’ve held in my desires for nuts for such a long time and it always overshadowed my habits”. “I realized that I am not the only one who has to deal with the consuming nuts but could suffer the deadly consequences”. 

“I want to use this hashtag to help others become aware as well as show solidarity with others”.

Roanhorse has built momentum on social media where many Navajos and non-Navajos plan to participate in #NoNutNovember. He was surprised to see so many non-Navajos participate.

“Non-Navajos joining the movement makes me happy”. “There are many differences in the world but we share a common allergy to nuts and if we can see other similarities we can make the world a better place”.

Dr. Debbie Yazzie, a Critical Medical Scholar, commented on the political nature of the movement. 

“A lot of allergies can be traced to colonization” she said. “Natives are developing allergies to certain plants and foods that were not here prior to the colonization of the Americas”. “This movement recognizes the differences that have been created with Indigenous genocide and ecocide”. 

Roanhorse did not consider the political implications but plans to work with Native academics about allergies and colonization.

“There is a lot of potential to made here”. “I can see a world that acknowledges nut allergies and colonialism”.

“This is a learning experience for all of us”.

Tlo’chi’iin surveyed the social media hashtag to see how many Navajos are planning to abstain from consuming of nuts. We speculate that thousands of Navajos will be participating. This may be the largest social movement since the push for Navajo voting participation.

#Navajo Nation #Navajo #no nut november #Indigenous #native american #Native #nuts

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Navajos Plan to Use Hardship Assistance Monies to Buy Shalimar

GALLUP, NM- Jonathan Nez was finally approved the Navajo Hardship Assistance Relief Monies from the CARES Act. This caused some relief among the Navajo populace but it has stirred some tensions about the qualifications for who can receive relief. Many plan to use it to pay bills and buy much needed supplies for their families.

Others have different ideas for their monies. Tlo’chi’iin spoke to some Navajos who are organizing to use their monies to buy the shady dance hall, Shalimar in Gallup New Mexico.

Many of the Navajos, bitten by Nostalgia, reflected on their first kiss, drink, and snag at the dance hall. It was obvious by their eyes they were two-stepping down memory land when they heard the name Shalimar. The tight grip of time never let go of these late night dancers, just like their one night dance partners.

“I kissed my first girlfriend there” said Cyon Benallie. “I will never forget the way the neon lights glittered off her dark brown hair”. “The smell was of aunties and uncles looking to have a good time”

It is clear that memory land is motivating these Navajos to pull money together to buy the dance hall. The property is selling at $1 million and they expect many Navajos to chip in for all the good memories. Tlo’chi’iin spoke to the organizer of the drive.

“Shalimar is a monument to native desire and reziliency” said Alicya Roanhorse, a community member of Gallup. “We want to make it the best dancehall there is with drinks and food”. “Despite the hardship, Shalimar was the spot where natives could be natives”.

“After covid19 ends, our people will want to socialize and dance”.

The group already has 500 Navajos committed to donating with more coming from non-Natives. The model of the business will be reflective of a worker’s coopt. 

#Navajo #Navajo Nation #Indigenous #native american #ndn

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Leaked Photos Show Lizer’s Loyalty to Trump

WINDOW ROCK, Navajo nation- In 2019, the Nez/Lizer ticket was met with hesitation from some Navajos who had no idea about the political leanings of Myron Lizer. He was an unknown person who owned an ACE hardware store but he was a blank slate. Their initial year was kick started with covid19 and Lizer has been criticized every since.

Covid19 revealed the infrastructural uneven-development of the Navajo Nation compared to the surrounding states and cities. It also revealed the political leanings of VP Lizer, a right wing infiltrator trying to turn the Navajo Nation red. 

Lizer’s infiltration began when he was making secret trips to Republican conventions behind Nez’s back. It became quite clear after leaked photos of Lizer with a bluebird Ku Klux Klan hood made out of blue bird flour. It sparked the #LeakyLizer on social media

Tlo’chi’iin spoke to Lizer’s administration about the photo leak. They were quick to call the photo fake and part of a public shaming of an “outstanding ACE hardware owner”.

“The photo circulating is not a Lizer, we ask our allies to stand down and stand by” the memo read. “This is obviously a photo from fake news media like Navajo Times, Gallup Independent, and AZ Central news”. “We won’t issue a  comment, or condemnation, on white supremacy”. 

“Lizer believes that God will sort out the races in his almighty wisdom”.

Many believe that Lizer’s political aspiration and confidence grew after his attendence of a small Trump rally in the Navajo Nation. We spoke to some Navajo political scientists.

“The rise of the right wing section has grown with the left wing and far right extremists have become emboldened by the agitations and protests” said Dr. Sandra Tsosie. “The right have become emboldened by Trump’s aggressive stance towards Biden, and Democrats”. “The Navajo Nation has been blue for a while and the right sees it as a place in need in conversion”.

“I suspect the leaked photos are part of that sentiment, a growing appeal to white supremacy”.

Others propose alternative analysis to the right wing conspiracy.

“I don’t think Lizer would be so confident in Trumps administration to wear a hood like that” said Dr. William Carlyle. “I don’t think he has the spine for such a wardrobe”. “I heard he was preparing his costume to Halloween”.

“The right wingers in the Navajo Nation may side with white supremacy but I don’t think they would put on the hood”. 

#Navajo Nation #Navajo Politics #Trump

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Nez Offers Free Colonoscopy with Hardship Assistance Relief

WINDOW ROCK, Navajo nation- Earlier this week, President Jonathan Nez finally signed off on the legislation for direct payments to Navajo citizens. It was approved by the Council and Nez was needed to finalize its deployment. Tlo’chi’iin spoke to Nez about his rationale and the extra service of a colonoscopy.  

“This was a hard legislation to pass, like a chąą' after a lot of sugar” he said embarrassingly. “I want my people to get through these hard times”. “This too will pass, like that extra hard chąą'”. “All the strenuous legislation passing made me reflect on the importance of colon and rectum health”.

“My advisors told me I need to offer more crucial and intimate relief for my peoples” he said with tears in his eyes.

Some were surprised by the president’s extra initiative for colon health. Navajo democrats were thankful for the emphasis on health.

“Nez has always been passionate about our health” said Myron Tsosie. “I remembered when he would said he would run on a healthy platform”. “Our leaders need to get checked up”.

Navajo republicans were critical of the service because they saw it as an extension of the welfare state that grew from the 30s. 

“Nez is the problem because he is part of the BIG government” said Karen Bedonie. “This is socialism, they take your private property and invade your private parts” she said angrily. “Our government should not be in any of our business; small business, big business, or lower bodily business”.

“First they give you a colonoscopy, then they steal your toothbrush, then its your freedom”.

Tlo’chi’iin will speak to Navajo citizens about their reactions to the hardship relief in a later article.

#Navajo Nation #Navajo Politics #Indigenous

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Tlo’chi’iin has made it into the news. 

#Navajo Nation #Navajo #Indigenous #satire #native american

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Trump blames Lizer for contracting coronavirus

 WASHINGTON, D.C. – President Trump was recorded on tape blaming Navajo Nation Vice President Myron Lizer for getting coronavirus. Lizer was in Washington, D.C. over the weekend seen mingling with Republican strategists while not wearing a mask. Trump fears that the Navajo Nation, with its high infection rate, put him at risk.

“It’s like the history of America, as I’ve always said, the Indians took our corn and killed us with disease. So sad. We need to fight back. This is why Jackson did the trail of tears, he was trying to quarantine the Indians. The tears were from the flu. They were bringing in all these diseases from China. I think Tik Tok is a Cherokee word.”

Lizer has been an outspoken supporter of President Trump, attending a rally in Yuma Arizona and even appearing in a recorded video for the Republican National Conference praising President Trump.

Sources close to the president tell Tlochiin News that Trump is considering building a borderwall around the Navajo Nation.

“If I win reelection, I’m going to cage in that pesky Lizer. What is with his haircut? It looks like a landing strip for Air Force none.”

Meanwhile, Lizer has returned to Shiprock where he plans to hold an evangelical rally to pray for the president.

“We got to pray the COVID away,” Lizer said to his followers. “If Jesus can cure leopard pee, he can cure COVID.”

Trump was expected to make a secret trip to the Navajo Nation next week during his visit to Arizona. But the visit was postponed while he and the First Lady remain in quarantine.

“Melania and I were looking forward to the spam burritos and frybread. Nothing is good unless it’s salty and fried. That’s what I always say, salty and fried. So tasty. Most tasty food you’ll ever eat. If the Democrats win, they will take away your salty and fried foods.  It’s going to be a disaster folks. No spam. No frybread. Total disaster.”

Lizer is asking Shiprock residents to pass the hat and help fundraise for the president’s medical expenses.

“Poor president Trump is the victim of so many things. Now COVID. When will the fake news stop!” Then Lizer turned to Tlochiin cameras and winked.

#navajo #myron lizer #tlochiiin #covid

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Trump Labels Covid19, “ANTIFA”,After Contracting It

WASHIINDON DC- Earlier this morning Navajo people learned that the First Lady and the President contracted Covid19. The announcement was made this morning on twitter. After the presidential debate, many Navajos were unsure of the spectacle they witnessed and Covid19 was a looming debate topic both men fumbled and argued over. Trump made fun of Biden for his mask wearing procedures while claiming that he carried one but only used it when he needed to.

Despite that, Trump contracted Covid19. After announcing his contraction of covid19, Trump quickly labeled the virus as part of the antifa organization. 

“Covid19 threatens our social order and we need to end it as soon of possible to make america great again” he tweeted. “I’ve been watching its spread and how its infiltrated our administration”. “I bet it was Biden who helped antifa infect me, I will not give in to antifa demands of quarantine or social distancing”.

“I’m no fascists but I will come down hard on anyone who opposes me, viruses included”.

Trump later tweeted that the first lady and he are entering quarantine. Some of proud boys, so called anti-antifa, promised to ‘stand down and stand by’ when it came to antifa actions. They have been seen wearing masks and social distancing.

Many have responded to his misuse and misunderstanding of antifa. In the presidential debate, former vp Joe Biden corrected Trump by asserting that ‘antifa is an ideology’. Trump never responded to that comment but Covid19 has forced to the president to take it seriously. 

It is estimated that 1 million people have died worldwide, 200,000 US citizens, due to coronavirus. Trump could be another statistic and the first death caused by antifa.

#Trump #covidー19 #coronavirus #Indigenous #antifa

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“Voting Is Sacred” Merch Sales Drops After Presidential Debate

NATIVE PRIVATE SECTOR- Navajo Economists woke up to news about a drastic change in the private sector of Native Nations. They were tracking the sales of ‘Voting is Sacred’ merchandise to study entrepreneurial commercialization and voting participation in Native nations. The capitalization of voting empowerment has impressed the economists enough to warrant a close study of sales and trends. After a month of close study and collaborative research, they were not prepared with the outcome last night.

US President Trump and Former Vice-President Biden debated last night on live television and many native constituents were not impressed by the cringeworthy performance. It prompted many to cancel, return, or sell their ‘Voting Is Sacred’ merch after the debate. Many economists were surprised by the debate and the sharp decline in voting merch.

Tlo’chi’iin spoke to some economists about the outcome and some citizens about the debate and the transformation of voting into a sacrilegious activity.

‘I expect Native entrepreneurs to capitalize on any trends and that includes social/political movements’, said Navajo Economist, Dilbert Redcorn. ‘It’s easy to associate economic power to political power especially when our nations are forced into poverty’. ‘We’ve tracked the entrepreneur’s sales and they were rising and last night they fell drastically’.

‘A trend just died and it left those small business owners with unwanted merchandise’ he said.

Many of those hoping to capitalize on voting rights are stuck with commodity and no one interested in buying. 

‘These proto-capitalists have all these unwanted products and they will lost their investment and possibly enter into debt’ said Sheila Ben. ‘This crisis will provide those discontent with the political system to capitalize on the debate like small town anarchists who sell shirts’, she said assuredly.

Tlo’chi’iin spoke to some citizens about their choice to cancel orders or return.

‘I thought voting is sacred but after that debate, I am not so sure it’s sacred’.

‘I didn’t watch the debate but the fabric was poor and I think they are made in a sweatshop, I am an ethical consumer’.

The Navajo economists assured us that the innovative entrepreneurs, needed for nation-building, will survive and continue to participate in the markets.

#Navajo Nation #Navajo #Debate2020 #Native #Indigenous #Navajo politics #Voting Is Sacred

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Vice President Myron Lizer Shows Off His Favorite Boot to Lick

WINDOW ROCK, Navajo Nation- The Navajo Nation is not a monolithic and that also includes appetites. There are many tastes in the Navajo ranging from mutton to prairie dog. Tlo’chi’iin conducted a survey about the taste buds in the Navajo Nation and the results showed a growing tastebuds.

Tlo’chi’iin reached out to Nez and Lizer’s administration about their taste buds. Nez declined to answer but his administration stated that Nez is enjoying a health lifestyle mixed with TIKTOK dances and healthy eating. They assured us that Nez has not partaken in the consuming of hot cheetos and soda to be an example to the Navajo youth.

Lizer’s office told us that the Vice President would be willing to speak to us; socially distanced of course. Vice President Lizer met our reporter to discuss his new fascination with boots and how they taste. We met in Window Rock, a place he describes as boot licker central. 

‘This will probably be seen as bizarre and unorthodox but I assure the Navajo people that there are many bootlickers in the world’, he said confidently. ‘Bootlickers have an affinity for the rich taste of leather and authority’. ‘Personally, I’ve been bootlicking for awhile but more and more bootlickers are becoming more visible’. ‘This is not a health trend, per se, it’s been a historically defined practice from all peoples’.

‘I personally lick the leather brand of American made boots, I yearn for the taste of exceptionalism’ he said laughing alone. 

Lizer continued his praise for leather, its taste, and usefulness. We asked if bootlicking would become part of Nez’s long term plan and possibly part of the next campaign.

‘I think Nez is a bootlicker and I believe he will become more open about it’. ‘It’s just a matter of time before he opens himself to practicing it as open as I do’. ‘If I run, I will definitely incorporate it into my policies and health regime’.

Many Navajos were turned off by the idea of bootlicking but some of the more politically conservative groups would be willing to lick the boots of surrounding leather sources before opening their pallets to the whole nation. 

#Navajo Nation #Navajo politics #Navajo #diné bikeyah #native american #ndn #Indigenous #bootlicker

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White Yoga Instructor Intentionally Manifests Destiny

MONUMENT VALLEY, Navajo Nation-Onlookers in Monument Valley were greeted by a white yoga instructor who posed for health. She was doing the downward dog and Navajo citizens were watching her as she contorted herself on the soft Navajo sandstone. Her flexibility was the antithesis of the Navajo Nation deadline for usage of the CARES act. 

It was an evening and the world was quiet. The wind was gently blowing and the sound of shifting sands could be heard. Navajo onlookers were capture by the sublime as the yoga instructor gently changed positions. 

The onlookers were shocked to see the white yoga instructor manifests herself into a racist. Her final pose caused her clothes to transform into a Native headdress with an assortment of Native designs. She started chanting, ‘Make Navajo Nation American’, ‘My Grandma is Cherokee Princess’, and ‘Natives are Poor Because of their Culture’, etc. 

Navajo onlooker’s faces turn to disgust and confusion at the transformation of the yoga instructor. The spectacle caused some to shake their head and leave disappointed. Tlo’chi’iin spoke to the some of the onlookers about the change that happened before them. 

‘She was talking about voting for Biden and how liberalism was necessary ideology for the Us’, said a Navajo man. ‘Next she was talking about how the coronavirus was a hoax’. ‘I think the headdress was unnecessary but she must’ve consciously believed in Manifest Destiny’.

‘She was saying that ‘we are all Indigenous’.

‘Liberals are one just post away from being as racist as conservatives so I am not surprised’ said another. ‘It’s so easy for both conservatives and liberals to hold anti-Indigenous sentiments without realizing’.

The white yoga instructor left before anyone could get their name. Others question why the yoga instructor was even there in the first place. President Nez issued a restriction of travel from the outside to protect Navajo citizens. Others wonder if the white yoga instructor is still racist.

#Navajo Nation #Indigenous #Navajo #Yoga #Manifest Destiny #native american #ndn

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Local Rezzy Uncle Says He Can Burn All The Hemp

SHIPROCK, Navajo Nation- A local uncle, Ronnie Bahe Benallie, said he can be contracted by the Navajo Nation to burn all the hemp in the San Juan area. His services come from years of experience of doing stuff...He did not comment on what that stuff was but he assured us and the Navajo Nation bureaucrats that he would get the job done. 

He was prompted by the debate about hemp farming in the Shiprock area. The legality of the Hemp farming has caused a stir for the folks in the region. Some say it is illegal and should cease and others say its form of economic development that should be applauded.

The debate over its legality can be framed as a political question of devolution; regional politics vs the central political apparatus. Dineh Benally says it was legal based on the San Juan board authority while others say its the central governments authority.

Ronnie Benallie doesn’t care for the politics but he offered his service to the Navajo government to destroy the crop. We spoke to him about his proposal.

‘I am an entrepreneur and I saw an opportunity that would fit my experience’ he said smilingly. ‘I never thought my services would be needed for such a large project, usually I’m operating a small business alone’. ‘I am plug for some folks when they needed help’.

‘This could really help me out because jobs are hard to find during the pandemic’.

We asked who he has contracted with but he declined to snitch on them. 

The Navajo Nation is still debating on the legality but it seems to lean towards the hemp farm being shut down. 

#navajo #navajo nation #Navajo tribe #hemp #Diné #native american #Indigenous

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Nez Says Tik Tok, on Rez, is Protected by Sovereign Immunity

WINDOW ROCK, Navajo Nation- There is one social media ban that President Nez will not allow, Tik Tok. Nez responded to the US President’s call to ban the social media platform due to the data breaches it may cause for the US. Nez released a statement saying that he, ‘will stand his ground’ and he ‘won’t back down’.

The Navajo executive power has been using Tik Tok to remind folks of Gasolina, relive AC/DC, and choreograph dance videos for the covid pandemic. Many Navajo citizens are surprised by his dance moves because they figured he was pander to the younger generation. Instead of the recent dance trends, he choose to dance like an uncle who partied too hard at Shalimar. Many respect him for that choice, authentic executive experience.

Nez quickly jumped to Facebook to let his followers know that he will continue to allow for Tiktok to remain in the boundaries of the Navajo Nation. He was not going to ban it but further use to work on his dance moves, let folks know what he is listening to, and some other things with covid. 

Tlo’chi’iin spoke to him before his meeting with the CEO Tik Tok. He promised to use sovereign immunity to keep Tiktok in the Navajo Nation. He was planning to use CARES monies to build a wifi infrastructure just for Tiktok.

“I won’t let some bully me on social media, usually I block people, but I won’t let Trump ban TikTok’ he said. “Social media has been how we’ve let the people know we’ve been passing out food and working on dance choreography’ he said defiantly. “I believe we can harness it for language revitalization”.

“Trump is on stolen land, he won’t take away our TikTok”.

The Navajo populace has been using social media for covid updates and many find the ban impulsive on Trump’s part. Others have bought into the conspiracy of China spying, a long tradition of US anti-Chinese rhetoric, and they think its China is spying on their data.

‘What I text to my mistress is my business’ said one Navajo man. ‘Nez isn’t going to protect my nasty videos and someone might use it to extort me’.

Others are more critical of the Navajo President’s dance moves.

‘I think our president can learn from the large social media influencers’ said a young man. ‘I would like to see more Navajo dances Stateline’.

#Navajo Nation #Navajo #Ndn #Indigenous #covid #tiktok #ban #native american

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Lana Del Rey Prepares to Visit the Navajo Nation

CHUMASH & TONGVA LANDS (Hollywood)- The Navajo Nation has gained the attention of many celebrities over the pass couple of months. The Navajo Nation has been visited by most of the decent avengers such as Hulk, Ant-man, and others. Other celebrities have contributed to donations for the Navajo people. Such attention usually is narrowly focused on Monument Valley and Shiprock for filming.

Another set of celebrity eyes has set on the Navajo Nation, Lana Del Rey. Despite getting called out for unnecessary opinions on non-white singers, Del Rey has been working on a book featuring their poetry. The proceeds will be given to the Navajo water project and she announced that she will visit Arizona and New Mexico during the pandemic.

Tlochi’iin News reporters reached out to public via phone calls to survey how some felt about the visit. We set our reporters to call random numbers in the Navajo phone book. Many people did not answer and those who did cautiously asked us if we were bill collectors. 

Many people were still reeling from her outright cultural appropriation and apprehensive visit during a pandemic.

“I appreciate her donations but I just don’t want a white woman coming to our lands during a pandemic” one Navajo lady said. “You cannot trust white people during a pandemic especially in our colonial history” she said over the NTUA phone lines. “I think it’s best if Del Rey stays home”.

“Is she the CEO of Taco Del Rey”one confused person queried. 

“She was the one who was culturally appropriating our culture right?” asked one Navajo man. “I remember that but I bet you that Nez will make a tiktok with her”. “We need to protect our people and make sure no one just wanders in”.

It is unsure when the singer will visit the Navajo Nation but Navajo citizens wished Del Rey would stay home. We reached out to the Navajo Nation President’s office but they were too busy making another tiktok to respond. 

#Navajo Nation #Lana Del Rey #Navajo Politics #Ndn #Indigenous #Native AmericAN