tiny-fairy03

[tiny-fairy03]

[tiny-fairy03]

sorry i cant hang out i forgot how to mimic human like behaviour

[tiny-fairy03]

[tiny-fairy03]

Does anyone else feel lonesome?

Not lonely. Not alone. Just... lonesome. Like you don't feel connected to anyone. Like you never feel that you will find anyone that understands you, that will see you truly, let alone someone who will even like you. You see friends everywhere, but you don't see yourself in their place, like that is not for you, like you're not made for that and that's not made for you. You see people having fun and laughing and dancing and getting drunk and falling in love and you just... don't feel that for yourself. Like you're not supposed to have that, like you can't because it's not for you and you're not for it.

Like you're supposed to be seeing all these beautiful things in the world but not experience them yourself. Like you want to experience so much, experience everything, but be overwhelmed by it so you don't do any of it.

Like you want to be everywhere and do everything, but you don't belong anywhere and can't do anything. Like you're not supposed to be here. Not in a self-deprecating way but in an incongruous way. You want to live you want to be alive, but you feel you're not supposed to be. Not here at least, not like this. Just a presence in the world, not an active member of it. Even your body doesn't feel like home, your face isn't a face you recognise, like you're not supposed to have either. Like you're just supposed to be.

Like you're supposed to observe, but not experience.

[tiny-fairy03]

[tiny-fairy03]

Do you ever feel like you miss out on life, because you are not able to socialize the way most people do?

[tiny-fairy03]

[tiny-fairy03]

[tiny-fairy03]

[tiny-fairy03]

nobody talks about the fact that you can have all this crazy shit in your head, and want to open up and talk about your feelings but no matter what, you just can't make out the right words and properly put your thoughts and emotions into words

[tiny-fairy03]

Anne Sexton, from a letter featured in Anne Sexton; A Self-Portrait In Letters

[tiny-fairy03]

Sylvia Plath, from a journal entry featured in "The Unabridged Journals of Sylvia Plath,"

[tiny-fairy03]

[tiny-fairy03]

Vladimir Mayakovsky, from a letter featured in "Love in the Heart of Everything; The Correspondence between Vladimir Mayakovsky & Lili Brik, 1915-1930,"

[tiny-fairy03]

“People think being alone makes you lonely, but I don’t think that’s true. Being surrounded by the wrong people is the loneliest thing in the world.”

— Unknown

[tiny-fairy03]

Nowhere (1997) // dir. Gregg Araki

[tiny-fairy03]

absolutely criminal how falling into bad habits is the easiest thing in the world while developing positive habits feels like fighting a literal war