thoughtsofiannejil
Here Lies the Inner Me
thoughts when my anxiety and depression attacks | my observations I keep to myself
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So I've been sick since Monday. I just noticed that I've matured.
Dati pag may sakit ako, ang mindset ko: "Uy may sakit ako. May valid reason kung bakit di ako nakabasa/kung bakit di ako makakapasok/kung bakit di ako makaka-take ng quiz."
Ngayon,
Them: Ate ang init mo. Bakit pumasok ka pa?
Me: Kaya ko pa naman.
Nakaka-proud lang.
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Not loved, only needed
I am that person in the family and circle of friends who is not deeply loved, only needed.
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路
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From now on, I will no longer recommend movies, series, books and music to anyone. They find my taste and interests ridiculous. Masakit. Then what? I'll find them later on liking it, even loving it, and they talk about it but wouldn't let me join. 馃様
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People don't pay attention to me when I tell them something amazing. Then, days later, I'll hear them talking about it. Worse, they won't even let me join in their conversation. 馃挃
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January 03, 2018
Ikatlong araw pa lang ng 2018, and I'm here stressed na agad. Didn't even give myself a chance to enjoy this vacation. Wish I have someone to talk to about this. Ever since new year came, all I ever saw was everyone posting "No more dramas". I don't want to ruin that. Wish I can be like them but I guess I'll forever be a dramatic trash.
mY WHOLE DAMN EXISTENCE is fucked up!!! I am currently taking up a course which I dislike! I feel like I am just wasting money! Pero ano bang magagawa ko? Andito na e. I have read na when you are after what you want, the universe conspires with you. So now I get it! I am not after what I want so everything's messed up!
Si mama wala nang work sa June. At walang balak mag-work hanggang December dahil gusto niya raw mag-Pasko dito. Can't stop myself from worrying. 馃槳 Hindi ko na alam. I just want myself to have inner peace
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