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New year, old habits.

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Got covid. Lost 5 pounds. WIN

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Apparently my ugw and my Cinderella weight are the exact same number. 🙄

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I've had 426 calories today and I feel like it's too much.

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Anyone else look up ana recipes and think, I bet I could make it less cals by omitting these things... Like, it's 140 cals of food and I think I can do "better."

#ana meals

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That one shot in To The Bone.

You know the one, don't pretend you don't.

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Today's migraine brought to you by: malnutrition. Malnutrition, an ana's best friend.

Take your vitamins, kids.

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So, I've spent the last week with little to no appetite. I lost 4 pounds. My entire kitchen is toddler food and low cal. Multivitamins are keeping me from passing out.

And I've never felt more valid in my life. UGW, here I come.

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Mon: 983

Tues: 942

Wed: 1173

Each of these days I actively burned 300+ cals.

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Diet coke and steamed spinach for an entire day's food. 60 cals.

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Pro Tip: When I get hungry, I reorganize my fridge and get so overwhelmed by the food that it becomes impossible to eat.

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Why is everyone better at this disorder than I am?

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My entire kitchen is full of ana foods. It's like a disordered person's dream. I don't think I could eat more than 800 cals in a day if I tried.

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Anyone else out there pretending their ED is a diet, or nah?

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Relapsing isn't falling back into starvation. Relapsing is eating. Relapsing is becoming indifferent about my weight. Relapsing is mindlessly grabbing a snack. Being hungry is always going to feel better than relapsing into being huge.

#ana thinspo

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This weekend my mother basically told me I need to stop eating altogether. 🙃

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The better it looks on the plate, the worse it looks on the scale.