thankyou4thevenom

[thankyou4thevenom]

[thankyou4thevenom]

I’m ambivalent to shipping

But

[thankyou4thevenom]

well the horrors may be beyond YOUR comprehension, but I comprehend them perfectly

[thankyou4thevenom]

i just cant get over the lobster scene. like his friends are actively begging him, do not get into the lobster tank. please eddie. tom hardy you were in mad max fury road dont do this. and tom hardy looks at his friend like “i know i shouldnt do this. i shouldnt be getting into this lobster tank but i’m going to anyway. i’m already mostly inside. cant stop now. i’m sorry i dont want to be doing this either there’s just no other choice for me.” and then he takes a bg bite out of a live lobster that’s still in the shell and everything. 

tom hardy doesn’t actually know he’s being possessed by an alien yet in the story. he’s just resigned himself to whatever fucking meltdown he seems to be having. he doesn’t even seem particularly surprised that things have gone this way for him. like ten minutes later he finds out his heart stopped working and hes just like “you asshole” and he throws his alien parasite against the wall like a water balloon. and then he just leaves and is immediately kidnapped. what a fucking wild ride tom hardy is on. 

tom hardy’s actual superpower is being the exact same level of dysfunctional no matter what is happening in his life. so when everything’s going ok for him he self-destructs spectacularly, but when literally everything that can happen to a human being happens to him, he does, like, unrealistically well. climbing into a lobster tank and eating a live animal with large claws just like… “well, this is what’s happening to me today. i’m so sorry you have to watch this, man. anyway here goes, i’m going to bite into a living creature with my human mouth and then LOSE CONSCIOUSNESS”

this movie’s fucking killing me from the inside.

[thankyou4thevenom]

They took the chickens and RAN

The name of this piece is "My Hands Are Full And My Ass Is Fat, You Wish You Were Me"

[thankyou4thevenom]

:* <3

twitter

[thankyou4thevenom]

Stitch and Lilo remake

[thankyou4thevenom]

halloween

[thankyou4thevenom]

You want Venom to be rated r so he can graphically kill people on screen, I want Venom to be rated r so he and Eddie can fuck. We are not the same

[thankyou4thevenom]

venom was finally released yesterday on my country and THE HONEYMOONNNN🧎🏻🧎🏻🧎🏻

[thankyou4thevenom]

Venom 2 isn't coming out til the 14th in my country, so I'm drawing fanart in protest.

[thankyou4thevenom]

Shoutout to my friend who accurately predicted I would enjoy Venom

[thankyou4thevenom]

Congratulations to Tom Hardy on being the only man in Hollywood to figure out that if he makes us our gay little content, we're gonna give him our gay little money.

[thankyou4thevenom]

[thankyou4thevenom]

the movie was so GOOD i want to watch it again like 100 or way more times

[thankyou4thevenom]

Absolutely delighted to see film bros giving Venom 2 mediocre reviews, because "there wasn't enough Venom vs Carnage action" and "the movie focused most of its runtime on Eddie and Venom's relationship".

They seem so lost and confused about the fact that this blockbuster, superhero movie is just not for them. It's like their favorite toy was taken away from them and given to kids who actually appreciate it, they can't wrap their minds around their wishes not being taken into consideration.

The reviews say that the plot lacks purpose until the final act, that the screenwriters didn't know how to get to the fight with Carnage, that there's not enough Carnage, and it's like... no, Brad Jared Chad Jeremy Chris Josh Matt, that's not what the movie is about, Carnage is just a framing device for a story that further explores Eddie and Venom's bond.

Andy Serkis and Tom Hardy clearly said "This one's for the monsterfuckers, the weirdos and the queers", what's not clicking?

[thankyou4thevenom]

i'm so glad the venom movies are "bad" because if they were "good" i'd have to sit through 20 mcu inspired setups for generic one-liners more painful than passing a kidney stone a minute and attempts to make tom hardy as eddie brock a neatly packaged clean shaven suit and tie sex symbol that only serve to do the opposite. instead i get the most hilariously earnest attempts to portray whatever the equivalent of a 'like an old married couple' relationship between a sweaty neurotic mess of a man and every monster fucker's dream of an alien slime that is also used for illustrative purposes when you look up the definition of 'bastard' in the dictionary is and i couldn't be happier.