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teen-wolf-quotes · 1 month
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Stiles: You know that there's a temple in Calcutta where they used to sacrifice a child every day? That's every day a dead baby, Lydia, every day! Hey you want to know what today is? It's dead baby day. Oh no wait, that's every day, because every day is dead baby day, yay!
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teen-wolf-quotes · 1 month
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Stiles: Hey Boyd! I didn’t know you were back at school.
Boyd: Yeah I would’ve told you, but we’re not actually friends.
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teen-wolf-quotes · 1 month
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Scott: Seriously, dude. Human sacrifices?
Stiles: Scott. Your eyes turn into yellow glowsticks, okay? Hair literally grows from your cheeks then will immediately disappear, and if I were to stab you right now it would just magically heal, but you’re telling me that you’re having trouble grasping human sacrifices?
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teen-wolf-quotes · 1 month
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Stiles: And you know who else is a virgin? Me. I’m a virgin, okay? And you know what that means? It means that my lack of sexual experience is now literally a threat to my life.
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teen-wolf-quotes · 1 month
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Stiles: Could he have been a virgin maybe? Did he look like a virgin? Was he, you know, virginal?
Scott: No, definitely not. Deaton makes me have sex with all of his clients. It’s a new policy.
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teen-wolf-quotes · 2 months
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Stiles: Where do you live?
Peter: In an underground network of caves hidden deep in the woods.
Stiles: Woah, really?
Peter: No, you idiot. I have an apartment downtown.
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teen-wolf-quotes · 2 months
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Stiles: I can’t take waiting around like this, you know? It’s nerve-wracking. My nerves are wracked. They’re severely wracked. Wracked.
Peter: I could beat you unconscious and wake you when it’s over.
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teen-wolf-quotes · 2 months
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Scott: They’re trying to help.
Derek: These two? This one, who used me to ressurect my psychotic uncle, thank you. And this one, who shot about thirty arrows into me and my pack.
Stiles: Okay, alright, come on. No one died, alright? Look, there may have been a little maiming, okay, a little mangling, but no death. That’s what I call an important distinction.
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teen-wolf-quotes · 2 months
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Isaac: Yeah, I still don’t like him.
Derek: Nobody likes him.
Peter: Boys, FYI: yes coming back from the dead has left my abilities somewhat impaired, but the hearing still works. So I hope you’re comfortable saying whatever it is that you’re feeling straight to my face.
Derek: We don’t like you. Now shut up and help us.
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teen-wolf-quotes · 2 months
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Stiles: What?
Scott: What, what do you mean “what”?
Stiles: I mean “what”, you know what.
Scott: “What” what?
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teen-wolf-quotes · 2 months
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Lydia: Is it me or is Beacon Hills turning into more like a beacon for the totally bizarre and supernatural?
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teen-wolf-quotes · 2 months
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Stiles: Hey Lydia, what is that? Is that from the accident?
Lydia: No. Prada bit me.
Stiles: Your dog?
Lydia: No, my designer handbag.
Stiles: …
Lydia: Yes, my dog.
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teen-wolf-quotes · 2 months
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Isaac: Have you tried calling Derek?
Melissa: Like five times. Do you have any more emergency werewolf contacts?
Isaac: Yeah. Call Scott.
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teen-wolf-quotes · 2 months
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Stiles: You know how many vehicle collisions last year involved deer? 247,000.
Stilinski: Oh god, please go to school.
Stiles: But that’s crossing the road. This one last night came right down the middle.
Stilinski: I’m not gonna beg you.
Stiles: Okay, good. I’m impervious to your influence anyway.
Stilinski: Would you consider a bribe?
Stiles: You couldn’t meet my price.
Stilinski: Extortion?
Stiles: You got nothing on me.
Stilinski: … Yeah.
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teen-wolf-quotes · 2 months
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Allison: There’s no such thing as fate.
Scott: There’s no such thing as werewolves.
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teen-wolf-quotes · 2 months
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Stilinski: You scored, and the tide just turned. And you scored again and again. You weren’t just MVP of the game. You were a hero.
Stiles: No, I’m not a hero, dad.
Stilinski: You were last night.
Stiles: I’m not a hero.
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teen-wolf-quotes · 2 months
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Lydia: I don’t care. I can help him.
Stiles: See, that’s the problem. You- you don’t care about getting hurt. But you know how I’ll feel? I’ll be devastated. And if you die, I will literally go out of my freaking mind. You see, death doesn’t happen to you, Lydia. It happens to everyone around you, okay? To all the people left standing at your funeral, trying to figure out how they’re gonna live the rest of their lives now without you in it.
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