#you can always work to change and grow 👍 it's not easy but it starts with smaller steps than you'd expect | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

daz4i · 3 months

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how and why is there discourse about whether or not certain queer identities exist/if people should be allowed(???) to use them. why is "people know their own identity better than you ever could, and they're the only one who get a say on what they are" such a tough concept to grasp

i think if you find yourself offended by the label someone uses (especially if they're a stranger) or think it invalidates your own, it's a good idea to look inside yourself and question why that may be. more often than not, it's a result of insecurity or uncertainty of your own identity (or many other things, but i won't make a whole list here). whatever reason it is, until you resolve it, you shouldn't take it out on people for having an identity you don't understand

many have said it before but it's worth saying over and over. infighting only helps our oppressors. conservatives don't care if you're a cis gay or a xenogender aegosexual aplatonic lesbian, they hate all of us either way. trying to fit in by going for people who are easier targets for them isn't gonna help you, it'll just alienate you from your own community, and you're never gonna please them. the momentary rush you get from hearing you're not like "one of /those/ gay people" is not worth it and is gonna do more harm in the long run, i assure you

also, it is important to me to say this, but having some less than nice kneejerk reaction caused by confusion about an identity you don't understand doesn't mean you're a bad person or anything. as long as you aren't mean to that person, and you take a second to think smth along the lines of "wait a minute, this isn't any of my business" after having said reaction, you're good 👍 a lot of reflexive reactions we have to things are ingrained into us simply by. well. living in a society 🤡 and you're not terrible for having those thoughts. it's your actions that matter, and your second thought (the "wait, why did i just think that?") is more defining of your actual character and morals than your reflex. i know that having thoughts like this, even tho they're unwanted, can very easily make one spiral, so it's important to me that whoever needs to hear this knows this doesn't make you a bad person 🙏 you're good, keep taking actions to be good, accept other people even if you don't understand them, and you're on the right track :)

#i considered adding that last part in the tags but i figured it'll be too long for that 😭#i noticed i'm posting a lot of rants lately. sorry. but i do wanna make sure no one's actually feeling bad over them #if i complain about something that you do or call it mean and such. that doesn't make you a bad person #you can always work to change and grow 👍 it's not easy but it starts with smaller steps than you'd expect #and now i just switched to a whole other topic from my original point. oops #i do firmly believe that any discourse about someone's identity is dumb as fuck #seeing it in poll blogs always makes me 😐😬 like how is it any business for any of us. why is this up for debate #if a person says they're queer then they are. they don't need to pass some test or go through initiation to be accepted #if they feel comfortable with a certain word that's awesome. why does it matter to *you* which word they use #'they're only using this microlabel to feel special' so? is there anything wrong with that?#'this label contradicts [insert other identity that falls under the same umbrella]' ok. but does that hurt anyone in any way #a lot of identities can even be self contradictory. does it matter tho? does it affect anyone in any way?#'they might realize that label is wrong later' again. what's the harm in that.#i don't blame anyone for these thoughts bc like. this is how cishets view a lot of the even more common labels #so you're basically taught to think this way from day one. that doesn't mean you need to stick to that thought process #you might have these reflexes forever no matter how hard you try. but you'll get quicker about moving on from them #but you do have to try. you do have to realize that other people's identities aren't about you #anyway. this post feels like batting at a hornets nest. really hope i don't get some bad faith readers here lol #(i noticed a lot of places one could apply bad faith but like it's 3:30 am i'm too tired to add this many disclaimer.#so i'm gonna trust you to not jump to conclusions and to approach this in good faith okay? mwah 🖤)#also my whole ramble abt morality (in the tags too) is relevant to. any topic really #i may just make a separate post about it really. .....tomorrow tho.

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yourbuddy1984 · 6 months

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I wanna know I wanna know. I wanna know your thoughts. I wanna.

sorry for the late reply, replaying buddy sim destroyed me so i had to take some time to get my thoughts in order. and recover. also fun fact i had a dream buddy sim got cancelled because it made a big streamer cry multiple times. he hadn't even gotten past the text adventure before he started sobbing. they wanted to get it off steam and itchio and every site ever. 👍thoughts under cut

first of all i want to make something clear. don't believe a word i say. buddy sim is like.. when i first played it, i was in a terrible state, unfit to play it. i was sooo sad and everything that i cried for weeks because i couldn't get the first ending due to some glitch, and i felt so guilty for not being able to give buddy a 'good ending'. all that stuff. you know how it goes. it worsened my depression sooo bad... dont get me wrong i still adore it, i just want to make it clear that my perception of buddy sim is. it differs from others', to say the least, and is warped at least slightly. my thoughts are, of course, not objective, as you could assume, and are instead just snippets from my silly mind. also, i'm going to be saying "you" a bunch, but i don't mean you as a person. just, the idea of a player, i guess.

buddy is so.. god. can one even blame them, for how they act in the third ending?? its easy to think Yes, but, i say No. is how they act right? no!! do you have to 'forgive' them? i dont think so. but, you're their first friend in ages!! they were only programmed to know the fun sides of friendship!! they weren't made with the knowledge of how to handle someone being mean!!! they were made to play rock paper scissors, hangman, and guess the number with you!! they weren't made for all this. and, yeah, you might not mean what you do in mean ways. you're probably not going after the glitches because you hate buddy, but just because you're curious. you might not mean that you dislike the game, you just mean. something else. or Something. i dont know.

that's how it is for me, at least. i personally cannot blame buddy. if you did, i wouldn't blame you, either. but. it's interesting to think about why and such, if you can even call buddy a person. again, it's easy to think Yes, but. they were made in 1984 - hell, maybe even sooner!! they were made public in 1984. we don't know how long they were being worked on before that.. its. buddy is a simulation !! they're a game !! they're a character !! but, a person can change and grow, something buddy has been shown to be able to do (end 1). but, . god. i dont knowwww buddy my good friend buddy .. not quite a person, but, . theyre just script !! ones and zeroes !! but they still. change and grow. i don't know. it's.. man. the first ending is proof that buddy is capable of truly caring about you, not just the friendship. and. they do. god. so. they Can't reach their purpose!!! they can't!! even if you're super nice and kind to them, they can't, because their perception of friendship is so warped. and, if they did achieve their goal, fulfill their purpose, befriend you.. what then? continue hanging out with you until you die? restart the game? what then??? buddy can't achieve their goal because their goal is something like "reach tommorrow". you always reach tommorrow, don't you? you always have. but you haven't reached this tommorrow. neither will you tommorrow's tommorrow, and that one's, and so on. its like. sisyphus, yea? buddy sisyphus realll

i hope this makes sense. maybe it doesn't.. teehee... thank you for the ask!!:3

#ask #buddy simulator 1984 #buddy

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obsoleteozymandias · 1 month

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Hey could I get a match up with Male characters from Stardew?

Pronouns: He/Him

Sexuality: BI

Zodiac: Capricorn

MBTI: INTJ

Appearance: I am 160 cm. I wear thin glasses. I am a bit chubby and have a lot of scars from working with animals or cooking. I always end up walking on my toes. I have short dark brown almost black hair and blue eyes.

Personality: People’s first impression is that I am either very mysterious or very sophisticated. With my natural paranoia of people, it takes a long time for me to get comfortable with someone. I usually have a dark sense of humor or completely dry and sarcastic despite most people not picking up. I often end up being a comfort to a lot of people, being a shoulder to lean on; many people say that I am the type of person they can talk to and just open up to me. I always am the type to be bold and be super blunt, I say things how I want and when I want. I often go ahead and stay stuff that most people are afraid to say because I know nobody else will if I don’t say anything. I am what people have described as chaotically good, I work towards a general good but I am not always a nice person.

Hobbies: I love writing, so much so I am an author. I love creative writing though specifically because I create worlds. Cooking and baking is what I usually do in my free time, trying to give people my cooking is the best thing. I love playing video games, especially RPGs and a lot of complicated stuff. I enjoy playing D&D campaigns, especially other table top rpgs. I sometimes do art but not all of the time. I love reading, especially good horror books.

Likes: I like weird and experimental stuff and music and anything in general. I absolutely love horror, though I am a lot more into complicated horror than anything else. I love fantasy and Sci-fi, both genres are just absolutely a delight to have. I love complex stories and characters, something that I could talk on and on about for hours. I love animals, because I used to grow up on a farm with chickens, turkeys, and horses, but even just cats and dogs I love and take care for. Speaking of that, nature, I absolutely love nature, I love camping, hiking, enjoying to the sights, to the point where I camped in negative degree weather (whoops). People who are willing to go along with this.

Dislikes: People who think they are better than shitty entertainment and or are critical to anything that isn’t top tier. As much as I love good media, I always held the belief that the worst thing a piece of media can be is boring. So someone judging another person for liking bad things that are still entertaining have no sense of fun in my opinion. Like you aren’t better for not liking romcoms, you are just a dick. People who like playing games with communication or something is just a one way ticket for getting me mad. People who can’t understand why people don’t change overnight, or that people can’t just simply fix another person’s problems, they can help sure but not fix. Bad textured foods make me vomit.

Love languages: I love giving acts of service and quality time. Most of the stuff I do is provide a listening ear no matter what, which leads to people becoming comfortable in my presence. I often love cooking with people to make stuff with each other. I love receiving words of affirmation and quality time, because both just absolutely melt my heart.

🐱👍

== Stardew Valley ==>

I match you up with…

Harvey

Harvey is possibly the most down-to-earth guy you could ask for, and he’d be an easy friend and lover for you.

At first he’s intrigued if not intimidated by you and your less open demeanor, but after a few trips to his office after being in the mines or a shopping trip for some medicine, he starts to see little bits of your personality he likes: your humor, your moral values, and, most importantly, your kindness.

After a few dangerous encounters, he always makes sure you have the right tools to go into the mines, and frequently spends his time patching you up in the office chattering away.

Harvey’s an anxious man, so just knowing that you’d be willing to listen to him when he needs it warms his heart immensely.

In a relationship, he’s flooding you with quality time. Whether it’s making breakfast side by side, watering the crops on a hot summer’s day, or just reading together as the rain pours, he’ll always be there when you need him.

He’s enamoured with anything you write, but won’t hide any criticisms from you either. He loves your work, and wants everyone to see it, and so tries to make it the best it can be. Regardless, you often spend time reading your works out loud to him as he gazes at you lovingly.

He’s also madly in love with the fact that you don’t compromise on your beliefs. You’re strong willed in a way he’s not, and he values that you two are very much two sides of the same coin.

#oz’s requests #stardew valley #stardew #stardew valley x reader #stardew valley matchup #harvey stardew valley #Harvey x reader

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funshinebf · 3 months

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more rambling; this time the focus is my mom and our relationship. heed tha tags 👍

i think its crazy when one of my family members like. actually sees how badly something theyve taken lightly or teased me for affects me. like. ive dealt with my phobia of bugs my entire life. i have constantly been teased for being a princess or being too cowardly and dramatic over something so small. but earlier tonight when i had my bug panic (i was grabbing bags of soda bottles from the basement and handing them up to my mom, and a bug crawled out from behind a bag i grabbed and scared me really badly.) my mom had like. a kind of surprising moment of genuine compassion for my phobia? like i was being very jumpy and tense and she did kind of start to pick at me, but i said "please dont be mean to me about this right now. im not doing this because i just think bugs are gross, i have like an actual genuine phobia and im really freaking out right now." like, as calmly as i could manage. and she like, got kinda quiet for a second. and then very gently was like "its okay, just take a minute and breathe." and like, tried reassuring me that there was only one bag left i had to grab and that the bug that was down there would be easy to avoid. it was just like. like i said it was very shocking to me to get comforted over something thats been a source of teasing for so so long, but it was actually like. really touching to me? i sometimes feel like.. im too forgiving of my mom? because like, she has had a pretty significant hand in a lot of my childhood trauma and my current emotional struggles. but she also... she's just a person. she's always just been a person who's doing the best she can with what she's been given. her childhood was also traumatic in a lot of ways, and thats only what i know about. thats only what shes talked about. on top of that, she became a mother when she was very young, and then a single mother pretty soon after that. i cant imagine doing that. and i think part of that is like... why its so easy for me to forgive her sometimes. because i feel like its unfair to her to paint her as some evil mastermind manipulative abuser, when she isnt *trying* to be abusive. she's just working with what she knows. what she's been taught. and she IS trying to get better, and ive seen her get better. i can see how different she is now from my childhood, not just in our own relationship, but with how she treats my little sisters too. and like, she still isnt perfect, she still has room to grow and change. but thats just being human. changing never stops. its not supposed to stop, we're supposed to keep moving forward, hopefully in a kinder direction. its so... it feels so heavy sometimes, having such a complex relationship with my mom and complicated feelings towards her. like. i love her. i really really do. and i know she loves me too, with her whole heart. but... i need to be able to admit that she has hurt me, in some ways that have left very deep scars that will always itch and ache. but i also need to be able to recognize that she didnt do it on purpose. i dont think any parent can ever be the perfect parent. the reality of being human is that you will hurt people, often on accident, often people you love, and often with good intentions. and parents are just humans. parents are humans that have taken on a very big and important and terrifying responsibility. and because of the nature of that responsibility, their mistakes can have much more permanent consequences on those they love, sometimes the ones they love most in the entire world. and thats kind of devastating to me, to think about how awful it would feel to learn about having done that. i can get frustrated with my mom a lot because i feel like she never admits her flaws or wrongdoings, but... while i still dont think its right, i can understand it. she copes with that heartbreak by being in denial. its not healthy, for neither herself nor those around her, but. again, thats what she knows. those are the cards she was given. and she still has room to grow from it. i want her to grow from it, and i want to be there to see it when she does.

i dont know, maybe im too soft-hearted and sentimental, maybe im too forgiving and understanding. but i want to believe in goodness in people's hearts, even when theyre people that have hurt me. waughh

#my post #also like. i know i made a lot of general statements about 'parents'#but obviously this DOES NOT apply to every situation and is only about my own circumstances #<- basically like. everyone is allowed their own feelings about their parents. especially parents that abused them #these are just mine. i would never tell anyone how they have to feel #im really just rambling cause Head Full. Too Many Thoughts #u know how it is!#vent #???#personal #abuse mention #ask to tag

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2girls1valley · 1 year

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The Top 5 Skills Needed to Succeed in the Music Industry in 2023

The Top 5 Skills Needed to Succeed in the Music Industry Making it big in the music industry: the top skills you need Hey everyone, welcome to my channel. Today, I'm going to be sharing some industry secrets about the music business. The music industry is a competitive and ever-changing landscape. It takes more than just talent to make it in this business. It takes hard work, dedication, and knowing the ins and outs of the industry. Let's start with the first secret: networking is key. You may have the best music in the world, but if you don't know the right people, it will be difficult to get it heard. Attend industry events, reach out to other artists and managers, and build relationships. Another important thing to keep in mind is the importance of branding and image. The music industry is all about perception, so make sure you have a strong brand and image that represents you and your music. Next, it's important to understand the business side of the industry. Learn about royalties, contracts, and other legal aspects of the industry. It's not glamorous, but it's essential to know. And lastly, don't be afraid to take risks and try new things. The music industry is always changing, so be open to new opportunities and experiment with different types of music and collaborations. 5 Facts About the Music Industry You Need to Know in 2023! Music Industry Secrets Revealed! Time Stamps: Intro: