#will probably go to bed rly early today even tho im not super tired

[fereldenshero]

feeling shitty. Again

#i think im just like. both overwhelmed and understimulated #like all day im busy busy busy out doing shit and seeing things and going to busy places #then we get back to the rental house n then i just sit in bed for hours doing nothing until i go to bed at like 1 in the morning #and its just cold and lonely and i hate my family and every day my moms in a shit mood which makes it all worse #like i should be Happy rn. ive been wanting to make this trip since i was like 14 #and i should definitely be happy to not have to be at work for a week lol #but idk. idk i think vacations just like are not rly my thing in recent times maybe #will probably go to bed rly early today even tho im not super tired #just bc i like. have nothing to do and i dont wanna sit scrolling thru apps all day #i brought my notebook with the intent to write or draw during my downtime but everything i draw sucks #and i cant think of what to write #i think i have an ebook i could read? idk. idk! #just like very emotionally tired. sucks that i have to go back to work literally the Day i get back home #bc my mom didnt fully communicate how much time i should take off #and then ill have a full week of work after that #so i wont be able to relax and fully decompress for another like Week after i get home #urgh #vent #lovely.txt