#which means listening to bry and dodie and tessa and keeping my fairy lights up as long as i can

[willowfey]

yeah i’m fine… ( <— still thinking about your life over mine by bry 11 years later)

#i feel like i’m 15 rn but also i can feel a new phase of myself about to arrive and she’s gonna be very annoying also like 15 year old me #all it takes is watching bry or dodie or tessa and i’m like. what if i just am what i wanted to be at 15 #woke up the other day absolutely terrified to get older and not be considered Young anymore bc #so much of my personality is young. i am a young girl. i don’t know how to be anything else. #how can i be a young girl when i’m 40? i don’t know. i have to figure it out #but while i can still be seen as young i need to feel it. i need to be it. which means being annoying #which means feeling 15 #which means listening to bry and dodie and tessa and keeping my fairy lights up as long as i can #and panicking about growing up. which is what i did at 15 too. #i’m gonna be 25 this year and i feel so disassociated from my age it’s scary. the last 4 years don’t feel like they happened at all #even tho so much Did happen. in a way. so much happened and nothing happened and i should be 15 #or at least 21 still. at least #but i am 24 and still waiting to feel my age and still waiting to be kissed and still waiting for my writing and my voice to sound like #someone else’s. so that maybe i’ll be able to read it and hear it and not cringe. #but your life over mine still makes me feel the same way it did when i was 15 so i’m gonna hold onto that small comfort