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dairyfarmboy · 3 years

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Dairy Farm Fantasy:

I have been seeking an opportunity to live/work on a dairy farm most of my life. I havent been working on a farm since I was a kid, and id like to find a likeminded farming partner.

I would be hired for the summer, and upon completion of a few months of training, i would be taken in fulltime and allowed to move in with the farmer permantely. It would also be a test to show my loyalty and service to the farm.

The farmer is a older man, tall, hairy, and built from a lifetime of farming. Wearing tall black rubber boots, coveralls, and a john deere baseball cap. Sporting a big salt and pepper beard. Never wearing deoderant, and would fill the air with his pungent musk, and hint of cow.

For the summer, Id be ordered to live in a spare room inside the cow barn until training is complete, where then i can move into the farmers home. Simple space with just a bed and a desk and a rubber flooring. The industrial smell of rubber, and strong manure/piss smell constantly overwheling the space.

Before starting, we went to the local farm supply store to get my work clothes. The farmer asked for my clothes and boot size. There wasnt much of a selection, and he handed me a pile of gear to try on. He followed me to the changing area which was just a curtain in the corner of the store. He told me to try on the carhartt bibs, and shirt first. I took off all my clothes and slipped into the bibs. It didnt take long for me to get a hard on. I stared at myself in the mirror admirring my new farmer look. The farmer said it looked like everything fit.

After a few moments, he came back with some boots. A pair of LaCrosse knee high boots, a pair of thigh waders, and a pair of industrial chest waders. I was ordered to try on the chest waders first. The smell of heavy rubber was overwhelming. I slid into the waders and was taken over by the rubber. My dick started to leak and throb. The farmer came by to help adjust the straps, and his musk added to my horniness. He had me in his full control.

After trying on all the boots, the farmer told me to give him my street clothes and put on the coveralls with the knee high boots. He said that we will be going to work right away and theres no sense in changing twice. He also gave me a john deere hat to wear. I walked to the counter in my new farm gear feeling great. A sense of belonging started to come over me. For the first time in my life, i felt myself. I couldnt stop starring at myself in the reflection of the shop window. There were also a few other farmers in their dirty gear walking around the store. I could smell the sweat and manure from one of the other customers.

I walked out with 2 pairs of coveralls, 2 pairs of bibs, 2 flannel shirts, a rubber rain jacket, 2 red union suits, a hat, rubber work gloves, wool socks, knee boots, thigh waders, and chest waders. Because its summer, the farmer told me i will only need the necessities for now. I was instructed to wear the coveralls for work, and the bibs for relaxing/night time. I would then sleep in the union suit at night. No need for undershirts and underwear in this heat and humidity. I was also ordered not to wear deoderant as its just the two of us so no need.

We get back into the truck and i immediatly start getting hard again. The truck was filled with the farmers smell and his manure covered floor mats. My dick was throbbing against the coverall material and leaving a big wet spot of pre cum. I was basically hypnotized by this man and couldnt think straight. We passed by neighboring farms and enjoyed getting whiffs of manure and hay smells.

Upon arriving back to his farm, i was ordered to put the rest of my clothes away and settle into my room. I walked into the cow barn on my way to the room when i saw a green, fresh, steaming huge pile of cow shit on the ground. I couldnt help myself and walked right up to it. I slowly stepped down into the squishing and felt the warm shit surround my booted feet. I could smell the strong warm humid smell. My dick was so hard it almost cut a hole in my coveralls.

I was the horniest Ive ever been in my life. I was under the spell of the farm, and could feel the inner perv coming out. The feeling of humid sweating in the gear, and smelling the manure was taking over my whole body. Without thinking, I pull out my rock hard dick and start jerking hard. Within seconds, i was falling to my knees uncontrollably moaning and shooting load after load. I shot about 10 good bursts, sending my cum 8’ across the hay and shit covered barn floor. My moaning went on and on.

After a few moments, i stood back up and saw the mess I made. I used my boot to push away the cum, and tried to wipe my boots off with a stack of near by hay. I arrive at my room and put all my clothes on the shelves. I realized my bed had a rubber fitted sheet over the mattress, and assumed he just wanted to keep it clean.

I lay down on the bed and felt my coveralls slide against the rubber sheet. I started to get hard again. I lifted my shit covered boots onto the bed and just laid back in my gear. I closed my eyes and took in the strong smell of the barn. I was getting horny again. My dick throbbed against the old pre cum stain i had left from earlier. I lifted my arms over my head and noticed my arm pits were getting ripe already. I just imagined my new life on the farm and knew this was what I wanted.

Seconds later i heard a knock on the door from the farmer. He said, “well i hate to break your new gear in this early but we have an issue with the slurry tank”. “I need you to put on your chest waders and rubber gloves”. “Hope you dont mind smelling like manure for a few days because this is going to be a messy job”. He gave me a long stare into my eyes with a wicked smile.

To be continued:

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nie7027 · 5 years

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Super5 headcanons part 3

Part 1 Part 2 Part3 Part 4 Part 5

Thank you everybody for saying such nice things of part 2 (as i said i wasnt that confident so it made me really happy to know you liked it) and sorry for taking so long but school is a bitch and almost killed my inspiration. Anyway here comes part 3

Minegishi: i just got out work. Can someone care to tell me what happened?

Hatori: uhh, yeah . sorry

Hatori: i got out of work like an hour ago and came home to find Shimazaki sleeping on MY bed

Hatori: Shibata was already at the gym and shimazaki hasnt waken up so i dont know much more??

Hatori: i dont know either what to do...

Shibata: is he still there? I told him to take my bed!

Hatori: well he clearly didnt...

Minegishi: ok but HOW did you find him exactly?

Shibata: ill tell you later guys. My next class is about to start

Shibata: And dont worry Hatori! i dont think hell wake up anytime soon.

Shibata: You should have seen him carrying the dog! It was cute <3

Shibata: in a strange way

Minegishi: dog?? WHAT DOG?

Hatori: did you just say "carrying"?

Shibata: sorry guys gtg

Hatori: shit WAIT

Hatori: where am i supposed to sleep now? I cant sleep on the couch!

Shibata: you can sleep with me

Hatori: WHAT? NO

Shibata: Do you prefer to wake him up?

Hatori: I pick the right side

Minegishi: No homo

Hatori: fUCk U

Shimazaki wakes the next morning to the sound of someone gagging to his right

"THE HELL IS THAT SMELL? WHY DO YOU STINK SO MUCH?" yells Hatori before letting out a muffled yelp when the pillow Shimazaki threw hits him square on the face

Shibata, probably alerted by Hatoris screams, comes running and asks from the doorframe "Whats going here?"

"THAT BASTARD SMELLS LIKE POOP AND NOW MY BED WILL SMELL TOO" says Hatori while pointing at the man on his bed who is just groaning clearly annoyed at being awaken

"Hmm it was probably the dog" says Shibata pensive and then looks carefully at shimazaki "You dont have more clothes dont you?"

"Holy shit! Thats true. Youve been using the same clothes since then..."

Shimazaki cant understand why it suddenly matters so much to them "No i dont. Now that that has been cleared up can i go back to sleep?"

"You have to change first. Hatoris clothes wont fit you. so take a shower while i search for something to lend you" says shibata and then turns to Hatori "you gotta go now or you are gonna be late. Dont worry todays my day off, Ill wash your bed"

"Thanks man" says Hatori and then quickly discusses something abouy dinner with shibata before leaving the apartment. Shimazaki can only stare. He just wants to sleep.

But before he can turn his back and return to sleep Shibata is already on him hurrying him to the shower.

Shimazaki doesnt like the idea of giving up his clothes to Shibata (he doesnt like letting go of his possesions because Mental eye cant find inanimate objects and he learned early on life how easy it was to lose things) but even he is starting to get nauseous at the smell of trash and he isnt in the mood to deal with it himself

Shibatas clothes fit loosely but they are comfy, besides once he gets out the shower the man has breakfast ready for him (theres still a box of his favourite cereal) and leaves him to his own devices while he does laundry.

By the end of the day Shimazaki has his own clothes back and they are softer than he remembers ("its the softener" says Shibata, "the what?" responds shimazaki)

Minegishi and Hatori arrive later with boxes of take out and they eat together in awkward silence until Minegishi casually asks with a smirk if Hatori and Shibata slept well at which shibata laughs and tells them Hatori is a blanket hogger which in turn makes Hatori complain about shibatas snores.

The childish fight continues and even though Shimazaki doesnt take part in it he listens atently

At the end he returns to minegishis apartment that night and sleeps on the couch. Neither of them uttering a word of what happened.

The next time Minegishi asks him to go grocery shopping he accepts.

This is stupid. This was a waste of his time.

Shimazaki couldnt read price tags or labels and he didnt know what he was doing here or why Minegishi had brought him

At most he could tell apart boxes from cans and the weight of things but he couldnt differentiate whether he was holding a can of tuna from a can of yakitori sauce or 1k of salt from 1k of sugar without having to ask somebody else.

It was even worse when it came to liquids if the milk/juice failure was anything to go by

After the first few failures of trying to pick stuff Minegishi had tried to teach him about couponing and discounts but then again he had to ask him the price everytime and they both soon got tired of it

All he could do was to touch and feel the fruit and vegetables trying to tell apart the riped from the rotten/damaged

Looking for any bump, hole, softness...things Minegishi taught him

It was stupid.

Minegishi could ripen/fix any plant with his powers and they both knew it

This was a waste of time.

He hated every second of this and wanted to go already but Minegishi had been hellbent on him learning at least this and left him in the fruits section to pick whatever he deemed best while he finished the shopping.

And that was what he was TRYING to do when a store clerk had the brilliant idea of addressing him

In his defense they had been almost 3 hours here and he had been done since the first. The fact he didnt even know what the hell he was holding anymore except that it was round and ripe not helping his annoyance.

He turned to tell her to fuck off. He just wanted to intimadate her. Force her to leave him alone.

He may have gone a little bit overboard.

He opened his eyes.

"Excuse me sir. Customers arent supposed to grab the tomatoes with their bare hands. The bags are-AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"

Her scream could be heard all around the store

Before he could teletransport away the tomato he was holding twisted and tangled its newly grown vines around his hand in a tight grip. (The sight of it clearly didnt help the girl's panic)

"Dont even think about it" hissed a pissed Minegishi when he passed by his side on his way towards the screaming girl.

Minegishi couldnt feel more stupid than he was feeling a the moment.

In his haste to initiate Shimazaki on the path of becoming a civil person he had somehow forgotten the man was actually blind (not his fault it was so easy to forget when you have seen him destroying entire buildings).

He had tried. He had really tried to come up with any way to fix this mess of a trip but it was getting late and they hadnt even started their actual shopping.

So at the end he gave up and left Shimazaki to the only task he thought could keep him busy and at the same time allowed minegishi to keep track of the mans position anytime while he hurriedly finished the shopping. It was a good plan. What could go wrong?

The moment he heard the scream he knew everything could and will go wrong where it concerned Shimazaki.

Thankfully he could feel he was still holding something vegetal (a tomato?) so Minegishi quickly dashed (shopping cart forgotten) to the mans position and the screaming girl.

His first instict had been to go and calm the girl even though he didnt know what had happened but when he realized people were starting to stare he quickly grabbed Shimazakis arm and dragged him the way he came.

"The fuck did you do?" Minegishi asked once they were in another aisle safe from curious stares

"I did nothing!" responded Shimazaki somewhat offended

" As if! What did you do to her? "

"I didnt do shit to her! I was just doing the fruit thing you asked me!" he raised his hand to show the tomato still holding onto it

"And? Why was she even near you?" mineshiki asked while his powers disentagled the vines and took the tomato

"ITS YOUR FAULT APPARENTLY WE ARENT SUPPOSED TO PICK THE FRUIT"

"Huh? What? I always do-THATS NOT IMPORTANT! Why was she screaming?!"

"I told her off"

"What? People dont scream like that when someone tells them off, even when you..." Shimazaki was clearly hiding something "How did you do it exactly?" minigishi asks with narrowed eyes

"....i may have opened my eyes"

"Your eyes?" minegishi stares increduously "whats that- oh" hes about to ask what was that supposed to mean when he remembers Shimazakis bottomless eyes caused by his physic powers. He may have gotten used to his hollow stare but he still remembers what he felt the first time he saw it. The girls scream finally making sense "You never open your eyes unless you want to threaten someome...did you want to threaten a simple clerk?? "

"No"

"Then?

"i just forgot!" shimazaki huffed

"You...forgot?"

"YES CAN WE GO NOW?" irritation lacing the mans tone

It was that moment that Minegishi realized this trip was taking a bigger toll on shimazaki than he (and probably even the man himself) anticipated and sighed.

"Yeah, i was almost finished anyway lets find the cart"

Shimazaki silently followed.

They finished the shopping without any further accident and while they waited in line to pay something caught minegishis eyes. It was just what he needed.

There was a row of cheap aviator glasses hanging in display.

After some considerantion he grabbed one of the pair with the mirror lens kind and handed them to a now calmer Shimazaki "Here, put this"

Shimazaki who had been following Minegishis movements asked curiously "whats this?"

"Glasses. In case you forget to keep your eyes closed again people wont be able to see your eyes. Put them on and open your eyes. i need to see if they fit and if they'll work"

He miraculously did.

The frame was thicker than it was supposed to be for these kind of glasses (a crude imitation of the stylish kind people wear in magazines) but they fitted and the mirror lens hid perfectly shimazakis glowing irises(?) (Hell never know)

"How do they feel?"

"Strange"

"You could wear them only when you are out in public. They are cheap. Ill buy them and you can do whatever you want with them"

Shimazaki took them off and when it was time to pay he handed them to minegishi

Once outside shimazaki at first refused to teletransport the bags back to the apartment but complied once Minegishi told him he would force him to help carry the bags all the way if he didnt do it AND promised to buy take out to eat.

Minegishi thought the glasses had been left forgotten in the bags but the next morning while he was getting ready to work he noticed they were laying folded on top of a sleeping shimazaki

When Hatori and Shibata inevitably asked about Shimazakis new glasses(that he now used all the time) minegishi told them about what was now deemed as the "supermarket incident"

The next times they went shopping Minegishi stayed all the time with Shimazaki and kept teaching him about vegetables and any thing that came to his mind.

Once they finished (everytime quicker than the previos) it became Shimazakis job to drop the goods at the apartment in exchange of picking what they were going to eat that day

It wasnt exactly what Minegishi had planned but it was a progress (or that was what he thought until Hatori complained about tripping on shopping bags that suddenly appeared in the middle of the hall whenever Shimazaki dropped something there)

Shibata was annoyed because even though they all agreed Shimazaki was behaving nicer the others didnt still believe him about the whole puppy ordeal

so that, coupled with the nagging feeling he had left after washing shimazakis clothes and after hearing about the market incident made him come up with a plan

"A mall trip?? What for?" hatori asked perplexed

"He has just one shirt"

"So?"

"He has been wearing it since we were together, actually i dont remember him wearing anything else ever"

"Thats his problem!"

"HIS JACKET HAS BULLET HOLES " replied shibata getting impatient with how much it was taking Hatori to understand

"He probably likes it that way??" said Hatori still not getting it

"Actually ive been thinking the same. I noticed the bullet holes too" finally came Minegishis voice from the receiver. He was was working at the moment because if they wanted to do this he had to work a double shift to free one day. "I dont think he has anything else"

"See? Minegishis with me!" exclaimed thriumohantly Shibata which only made Hatori roll his eyes

"Fine! i get it! Ive seen the bullet holes too...but i dont get why does it have to be us?"

"Because we are his friends" easily replied Shibata causing Hatori to frown at this

"Are we really? When has he done something for us?" hatoris tone suddenly turning serious "You are literally asking me to spend one of my few days off shopping clothes with MY MONEY for a guy who wanted to kill me mere months ago?"

"We dont know that" said shibata

Hatori trew him a glance that clearly was supposed to mean 'you gotta be kidding' "Look, do we even know if he likes us back?"

At this both men kept silence until shibata dared to speak "he is wearing the glasses"

"God forbid me for forgetting those damn glasses! Guys, im just saying we are already doing so much for him for nothing! why do we need to do more?"

"Because thats what good people do" came Minegishis response and shibata nodded firmly making hatori huff. He was gonna regret this.

" fine! But do we even know if hes gonna like what we buy? If hes gonna even wear it? As you said we had never seen with other clothes"

"Thats why we are gonna take him with us!" said Shibata, glad that this was finnally getting somewhere

Hatori turned to look at the phone "didnt you said you believed shopping stressed him?"

"Mmm these last times had been better" said minegishi

"What if he actually doesnt care about the clothes or-"

"He does" replied Shibata and Minegishi in unison making Hatori stare confusedly

"How do you know?"

Shibata thought back to the hesitance he noticed on shimazaki when he handed him his clothes but didnt think the man in question would like it if he went and tell this to the others and was debating this when minegishi spoke again "Ive noticed someone has been using my softener and i doubt its the plants"

Hatori frowned and then sighed

"You both have settled your minds dont you?" hatori asked and then grumbled when an unison "yes" was heard

"Do you realize we are working with a lot of 'maybes' and 'probably'?"

"Maybe" said the voice from the receiver and Hatori could swear he could hear minegishis smirk

"C'mon man! We have done worse than this" said Shibata happily clapping Hatoris back

"Ugh FINE That bastard better be grateful" grumbled Hatori

This part forced me to think of shimazakis past and now i made myself sad (this isnt the first time he wears glasses)

So the market incident and the glasses scene was stuff i thought about since i started these and was really excited to write it. I hope i did them justice .

I didnt realize how much longer part II was compared to part I so i think part III ended in a nice middle ground.

Haha i again didnt reach the scene i planned to reach(the prank) and at this pace this thing will have 6 parts. Someone save me

Anyway hope you like it and for those of you who dont know I am writing a Teru-centric fanfic about his decision to visit his parents and the aftermath and ill appreciate it if you could check it out (link here) and tell me what you think or at least share it so more people can see it because tumblr sucks and wont let me do it.

See you next time

#mob psycho 100 #mp100 #shimazaki ryou #minegishi toshiki #shibata hiroshi #hatori nazomu #mp100 spoilers #manga spoilers #i think that tag doesnt apply here #super5 headcanons #nie's writing

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wildgeese2017 · 3 years

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i dont know whether i want to hav sex with her like if i cud. i think that shes into me she smiles at me and she seeks me out and she laughs at my jokes and compliments my outfits? ive known her so long and i trust her kindness. i think shes cool and sweet and interesting and like she really listens to what i say and is childish like me like she isnt embarrased to act weird and silly and get excited about little things. she seems like she wants to be around me. and i hav convinced myself that i like her. for years shes been my go to crush. its just when i imagine being touched it makes me feel weird?? i know shes had gay sex b4 i think shes hot and pretty and i love her style. i wouldnt mind touching her but the thought of someone touching me in that way scares me i worry that it would repulse me. but i want it so bad. i want her to kiss me and rough me up a bit push her fingers into my thighs u kno stuff like that , is that what attraction is? my relationship to my sexuality and body even is so warped and abstract at this point so disconnected from what reality can offer me. i think she is closer than most people to what i cud actually even attempt to experience something with tho. like she gets me im afraid of men so women make me feel safer to try stuff with i only hav experience w girls anyway not that its actually substantial or like in that romantic serious context. i just i want to be wanted so badly i know that i have been at least once. i get so confused i cant possibly be that bad but noone has ever loved me for my body. i can timagine what its like to experience the reverse. sure i am granted the privilege of not bein specifically disliked automatically for my body but it isnt worth much more as social currency beyond basic decency (which everyone deserves but doesn’t get). maybe i need to be less in my head. but im scared ill try intimacy with her and i wont like it . and that will mean a few possible things which would fuck me up and scar my self perception. firstly, it could mean that im not capable of normal intimacy that i am really genuinely fucked in the head like the rabbit hole i fell down when i was 11 genuinely messed me up like i gave into some evil shameful thing inside me when i was a child and now i can never be acceptable normal healthy or loved securely. second it cud mean i dont actually like women ive been playing as part of the lgbtq community this whole time how can i face myself or my friends being straight is shameful to me its so lame and uncool i know this sounds so like weird and fetishistic or performative but thats exactly what im afraid of i dont want to see myself like this i wasnt ready to label myself but i did i labelled myself so young and now it feels scary it feels wrong for me to say i dont like it when people are like you;re bisexual right? i feel that thing when you share too much too soon like your skin is peeled off all raw and exposed. i hate that. what if im too messed up i dont know it for sure what if intimacy proves im broken. or at the very least very unique in a way that could lead me to living my life alone without partners or lovers i want so desperately to be someones favourite someone who makes me feel good when they touch me and anxious and annoyed. i want to care about someone so much. too trust someone to see my body like my weird moles and self harm scars my veins and hair and teeth i want someone to see me all of me and still decide they want me. that i am worth the effort that they would seek me out. i dont know if that will happen.

i drive myself crazy looking in the mirror in different angles wearing all these colourful frilly lacey outfits agonizing over how i must look. i make myself soft and sweet and loud and excited and loving so others will seek me out im like a duimb tropical bird and it hurts so much because it doesn’t feel like its working.

people say be true be authentic but they dont say how much it hurts to do that and not be idk rewarded? desired? like i am expressing myself and that is pushing people away even subconsciously? sure it would feel amazing for someone to see that expression and see that fragment of my inner world and think i love that i want that i want her i love her but it isnt happening not as far as i know not in a way which satisfies my lonely soul.

i just dont want to be disgusting i try so hard to smell good and look sparkly and fun and bright and loving i think the manic pixie dream girl trope really damaged my psyche

i think i like other people too i feel different when they touch me like it feels more intense more like its getting through.

as far as i can tell my type is funny, creative, nice boobs dark or curly hair usually, i like people who are kinda sad bc i think we are alike which sounds cringe but people who are just living in a way which seems at least to me in a non-judgemental way to be unexamined i just cant really relate to i cant open up to someone who wont understand. i need people to say the right things or at least say nothing and only respond with touch.

is it weird that i carry on asking myself if i was touched as a child ? like i dont htink i was but i carry on feeling like it could have happened or i convince myself i did and then i mistrust people for no reason. but something must have happened i had such messed up thoughts maybe it was all the sex on tv i watched as a really young kid my parents would show me stuff with full nudity and relatively graphic sex my relationship to modesty is confusing i think i find people more attractive with their clothes on? i just see naked people like ok? thats a body its normal i dont get porn.

one thing i regret was being drunk and telling M that i cant watch porn i like weirder stuff and she was like bdsm? and i was like no its so weird it cant be in porn but i didnt mean it like that i meant i cant just feel stuff from nudity without context and i am into weird shit i dont know why i think maybe my mums mental health issues which she projected on me im worried i was just made wrong like im just a bad seed like i was destined to want things which dont make sense. but then i consider my whole warped desire hinges on the way it could be percieved by society the way society views people and their intented state of being. i am attracted to corruption addiction to transformation to giving into desire to showing desire physically with your body in a way that everyone can see and you can no longer control.

everything in my life boils down to my relationship with control. maybe its because i felt i didnt have any control as a child. my life was shifted against my will and i have this learned helplessness both from having my needs met without asking and from having my needs ignored or at least met in a lacklustre way. but then i think who really had control as a kid? kids dont control their life they dont make the decisions that what a guardian is for ?? but maybe its because i felt as though i did have to make the decisions like i didnt have clear boundaries and i dealt with that by punishing myself for overstepping rules i made myself. bc i had no control not really it felt like nobody had control there was noone to blame so i made things up new problems i cud blame myself for or i saw the problems my parents had said to myself i have that problem too and punished myself for it with feelings or pain or exercise or silence. i couldnt trust anyone. or at least i loved people but i couldnt open up. maybe thats why im so weird and territorial i keep things secret i hide stuff in my cupboard its like i invent things to be ashamed of i create problems for myself to distract from the problems i didnt have control pver the conception of. when i think of my childhood i think of feeling bad and ashamed of myself for taking advantage of my father like he was vulnerable and all i did was take money and time from him and he was struggling so much financially but he would still spend so much on leasiure when i think of it now i realise that spending time with me and making him happy must have made him feel good i get it more now that i do that with other people but at the time i felt so guilty all the time for the price of my clothes my food my life. and my mum would always say how terrible things were with money how tired she was how stressed she was how it was affecting her body. she would talk about how much she hated her body her fat her sagging face her pale skin her poor health i asked her once what superpower she’d choose and she said i want to be healthy all the time and i was confused then but i get it now.

i just felt like i had to pretend to be happy or like i wasnt bored or the time like i didnt feel bad about how my stomach looked how yellow my teeth were how tangled my hair was the bags under my eyes and when i look back i realise no one was looking after me noone was making sure i brushed my teeth and hair twice a day i barely did it once a day i used to hate myself so much that i couldnt do my homework but nobody ever sat with me and made sure i did it past like the age of 7 . i remember feeling so scared of asking for help i remember having nightmares or being sick and standing on the landing listenning to my mother breather through her door being petrified of asking for help like she needed the sleep and i was a bad person for waking her up like i was lying and then i actually started lying bc she wud just accept it let me fester on my own in bed all day if i said i wanted to if i said it hurt too much. i just im so scared of feeling that way again of feeling so scared so tired so useless so guilty so dissapointing so stupid so dumb so shallow so selfish so unworthy so dishonest so lazy so manipulative i look back and i think how could a child have been so awful? how could i have been as bad as i thought i was? it doesnt seem possible. the point at which i became irredeemable seems to shoft forwards each year like its chasing me and i become more and more of a villain stealing a bright future from the innocent child i used to be. i used to fantasize about going back and doing it all perfectly. when people asked me about my choice of power it always had to do with avoiding the consequences of my mistakes either immortality or time travel to be able to change what i did or to be able to move on without losing my future without losing my finite time. i want to be free of these constraints that feel so self inflicted. i spend so long in these mind prisons i construct labrynths in my head and get stuck there all alone with no way of asking for help without admitting how i got there in the first place.

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shouucore · 5 years

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Safer Cycling on the Streets

Cycling is simple, isn't it? Anyone can do it. So why write this article?

Because it is not-so-easy to cycle S A F E L Y. Many a times accidents ( which SHOULD NOT have happened) do occur. Spend a little time to read this article and you will become a safer cyclist.

Like driving, cycling safely requires awareness, concentration, quick reflexes and a good set of safe traveling habits. In all my years of cycling, I have been quite fortunate to be accident-free. I would like to share some of my cycling habits and experience which so that you too can ride safely on our roads.

Disclaimer: Whilst these safe riding skills works for the author, please consider them carefully before use. Due to numerous variables involved on the road, not all situations can be possibly covered. The author will hold no responsibility for any accidents or injuries as a result of applying information contained within this article. You are advised to consider carefully before applying these techniques at your own risk.

WHAT IS SAFE CYCLING?

Safe cycling brings you home safely. It reduces the risk of road traffic accidents to an absolute minimum. A cyclist who rides safely will not force other road users to take late evasive actions which may endanger lives.

This document is divided into 4 sections. Please click on the underlined titles below to skip to the section you are interested in.

SAFETY EQUIPMENT:

Bicycle helmets

The foam inside the helmet absorbs the impact of a fall on your head. It compresses and breaks to prevent your brain juice from spilling all over the road. Always wear one.

Bicycle mirrors.

Some attach to the edge of your handlebar. I find it difficult to focus into the small mirror (which shakes with the vibration from the front wheel) and it takes my attention away from what's happening in front of me.

Rear reflector and rear light.

Other road users seem to pass me with more side clearance when my rear lights are on at night. Perhaps it tells them that I am a valid road user and reminds them to take cyclists seriously.

Front light.

At night, never ride beyond the nearer of your braking distance or your bicycle's lamp range, especially on dark downhill streets. Your lights will also help attract the attention of drivers along merging lanes.

Clothing.

There is a reason why cycling jerseys are always colorful and , at times, "loud". It helps to improve the visibility of the rider on the road. At least wear light coloured clothing so that you can been easily seen. I always get worried for those Indian cyclists along Zhu Jiao Centre who wear dark clothes and ride without any lights/reflectors. They are probably just more visible than the shadows around.

PRE-RIDE CHECK

Ensure your equipment is in safe working condition before each ride. This is my quick "1-2-3" routine that I practice before each and every time I return to my bike. It should take less than 5 seconds and allows me to have much more peace of mind during my ride.

Quick release parts - Check these easily removable fixtures if you have them. Do not fall victim to children with "itchy fingers", foiled thieves or saboteurs. It is too late when your front wheel disengages itself from you fork when you are flying over a hump.

Brakes - Always test the strength of the brakes (esp front) before you ride off. It allows you to have an idea how far your minimum effective braking distance (see the section on emergency stopping on how to establish it) will be.

Bike bounce - Hold your bike by the handle and seat, lift it by about an inch and let it drop on its wheels. Apart from some chainslap, you shouldnt really hear any other sounds. Otherwise, check for loose parts.

GOOD CYCLING HABITS

By reading the techniques below, there seems to be alot to do while cycling. Dont worry about it. These skills will slowly be internalised and before you know it, you're already doing it.

ATTITUDE'They are always "right"'

Cyclist are probably the most vulnerable group of road users. We stand to lose the most in an accident. Whether it was due to our fault or due to other's mistakes does not matter. Hence, it is not always wise to enforce your "right of way".

'They are all out to get you'

Sounds schizophrenic and probably not fun to cycle with. But it is useful for beginner cyclists until they have enough road cycling experience under their belt.

'Thank goodness i'm okay'.

Ask any regular road cyclist and i'm sure that they'll have some "close shave" incidents to share. Such situations will happpen and if it is due to a driver's poor road behaviour, it is quite understandable for you to get angry or to vent your indignance on the driver. Dont do that. The driver will have realised his mistake if it was a "close shave". Showing your anger probably will make the driver loathe cyclists more. More importantly , it'll unsettle your emotions and for the next few miles, and the incident will probably dwell in your mind. Just be thankful that you were skillful/smart enough to avoid an accident, learn from it and let it go. Then, focus on the immediate road needs. As a cyclist, you dont have the luxury to be distracted on the road.

GENERAL TIPS

Time allowance.

If you have a dateline to meet, estimate how much time you need your destination on your regular cruising speed and cut yourself extra 20% slack time. Rushing increases the chance of mistakes, and mistakes can have disastrous consequences on the cyclist. Giving yourself enough slack will also allow you to enjoy the ride more.

Bike control.

On Singapore roads, the double yellow lines are very useful as a guide. I try to track between the yellow lines unless the drainage holes extend into that region. Practice until you can hold your "line" +/- 1/2 foot and these lines will remind you not stray too far out into the road.

Ride with company.

Not only will you have someone to chat with, you can practice drafting and you can look after each other. If you must ride alone, always keep a note on you with the details of a contact person to reach in the event of an emergency.

Use hand signals.

Do not sway direction suddenly without notice. Remember to signal in advance, check if you have enough space before changing direction. By doing so, other road users are to be able to anticipate your path and pass you safely.

Look to the rear.

This is essential before changing direction, passing junctions/merging lanes/bus bays. Just a glance is needed to establish the traffic situation behind you. Are you able to look over your shoulder and yet keep your bicycle moving straight ahead? If not, here's how you do it - relax your muscles from your shoulder up, touch the tip of your chin to your clavicle bone and glance back. No other parts of your body should move since that might affect your stability. When you are familiar with the motion, practice this on your bike in a safe open area before progressing onto the road.

Establish eye contact

Have you ever felt someone looking at you and turn to actually find someone doing so? I cant explain that sixth feeling but it is a very useful tool for cyclists. Do not just consider cars as moving metal boxes. Look into the driver's eyes to establish his intention. The vehicle's sideview or rearview mirrors can help do this. Conversely, with practice, you can project your intention to drivers through your eyes. But remember to check that the road conditions are clear before doing so.

Look

at the side

of obstacles.

I've heard some fallen cyclists say, "I SAW the obstacle coming, but couldnt react on time." *SPLAT*. Your bike will go where you intend it to. If you look AT the obstacle, you WILL go over it. When you are going fast on your bike, dont concentrate ON an obstacle when you spot it. Instead, look at the SIDE the obstacle and your subconscious mind will help you steer around it. Avoiding obstacles is that simple.

Emergency stopping

How far do you need to stop your bike in an emergency? If you know this, you will be able to estimate how fast you can/should travel. The minimum effective braking distance is a function of 1. your reaction time 2. effectiveness of your bikes braking parts 3. your braking technique 4. road conditions and gradient. When you grab a fistful of your brakes, the pads tend to lock both wheels. Sometimes, the resultant force throws you over the handlebars and cause you to end in an ugly "face-plant". With the correct braking technique, you will not "endo" unnecessarily. As you brake, lift you rear from the seat, shift your weight diagonally downwards to the rear while straigtening your arms. In your final crouch position, your chest should be inches above the seat and your rear just inches above the rear wheel. By shifting your weight in this manner, you are able to counteract the resultant "up and forwards" force that trys to yank you over the handlebars. You will probably wear some rubber off your wheels from the skidding but you will stop very quickly without "endo"ing. Practice this well, it'll help to save your life.

Reading the road

You need to understand what is happening all around you when you cycle. If you are already a driver, you will know how to anticipate other cars paths. Otherwise, some experience on the road will help. Also, learn how to distinguish road hazards eg. large bumps, cracks on the road and potholes. What is on the surface of the road? Oil? Sand? Moss? What is the effect of it on your braking distance? Do not just use your eyes. With experience, you can HEAR heavy vehicles approaching, FEEL the draft of a vehicle beginning to overtake you and even SENSE a driver behind looking at you.

Road shoulders

On a road without kerbs, you may sometimes encounter a 1 to 2 inches vertical drop between tarmac road and the soil. If your front wheel goes off the road and down onto the soil, do not attempt to get back onto the tarmac immediately. Unless you are supremely skillful, the forces acting on the bike will cause a front wheel skid-fall. I have witness at least 2 such incidents where cyclists in front of me have lost some skin to the tarmac this way. Where possible, let the rear wheel drop onto the soil before attempting to get back onto the tarmac. I would recommend a path of travel back up of no more than 45 degrees to perpedicular of the tarmac. Approach at any greater angle and the reaction force from the front wheel hitting the vertical edge may yank your front wheel front beneath you.

ON THE ROADCross traffic junctions - safety check

We all know that we have to look before we proceed. But which parts of the cross traffic junction do we have to be careful of?

Blind spot

Sometimes a large vehicle will pass you while you are within the junction box. This is a dangerous time as vehicles waiting on path 3(see picture above) may not see you as you are hidden behind the large vehicle. If the road is clear behind you, they may decide to begin their turn only to see you too late. Slow down until you can ensure that path 3 is clear before proceeding.

Positioning at red lights

Position your bike several feet ahead of the leading car (be careful not to go into the junction box!) so that the driver behind you can see you and give you ample space when moving off. By positioning you bike there, you will not have to jostle for space once the green light appears.

Buses and long vehicles

When being overtaken by long vehicles, slow down so that they can pass you as quickly as possible. In so doing, you reduce your risk of being 'squeezed out' onto the kerb.

Parked vehicles

Be careful of these immobile dangers. Before passing one, do note if it is empty. If it is not, try to give at least 4 feet side clearance. There are inconsiderate drivers who do not check their rear before opening their doors abruptly. Also, look at the driver to see if he is about to turn out into the road. Occassionally, pedestrains may suddenly appear from in between parked cars so do control you speed before these points.

Wet weather

Best not to cycle in it. If you must cycle, beware of the smooth freshly painted road signs on the tarmac and metal grills. You will not be able to distinguish the depth of puddles so try to avoid them. If you are cycling on smooth cement after the rain, note areas with moss growing which are very slippery. Another dangerous period is when it just begins to drizzle. People tend to rush to escape the rain. Be especially alert - dont be overly preoccupied with rushing for shelter. Other drivers are rushing too!

Night riding

In dark places, always ride within the nearer of your bike light's range, your minimum effective braking distance, or as dictated by road conditions. In essence, do not go too fast at dark places.

Some of the notes above may not apply to the country that you are residing in. It depends quite alot on your local traffic condition. Just adapt as necessary.

Here is an interesting anecdote: When I was cycling in Guangzhou (China), there were so many bicycles weaving in between the chaotic traffic than I was throughly confused. I was petrified at traffic junctions. There did not seem to be any system at all. It was only until a local cyclist enlightened me: "Just worry about your front. The people behind will take care of themselves." Subsequently, it so much easier to bike around there. Its just a different cycling paradigm there.

#bikelife #cycling #commute

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nie7027 · 5 years

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