#uncannyxmen260

[gaknar]

If I remember correctly, we’re entering a real Uncanny X-Men lull. Amnesiac Colossus is bumbling around New York City. Banshee and Forge go on a real Brienne of Tarth goose chase searching for the missing X-Men. And this story here is about some drug addled Hollywood failure trying to murder Dazzler. Man, where are the aliens planting eggs in people??? Where are the evil mutants trying to pervert and corrupt the psyches of our heroes??? Where’s all the flashy comic book action that includes all manner of lasers and flesh getting cut??? It’s true that this string of Claremont X-Men comic books is a little, shall we say, slow. But let’s just hang with it for a few issues and see where it’s going. (Uncanny X-Men #260 – Apr 1990)

#x-men #xmfbte #clare5 #uncannyxmen260 #covers #eric beale #dazzler

[gaknar]

Geez this product placement is a little weird. Are wet suits comfortable? So comfortable that one might lounge around and watch a full length movie with one on underneath your clothes? When I was a kid reading this, I had no idea what a Body Glove was. I still don’t really.

Hey, if Dazzler has such a bad memory, then how come she knows so much about surfing!! And how does she know how to shoot upside down finger lasers with such accuracy!

I guess Siege Perilous just gives you MOSTLY amnesia. (Uncanny X-Men #260 – Apr 1990)

#x-men #xmfbte #clare5 #uncannyxmen260 #dazzler #eric beale #guido #freddie stanachek

[gaknar]

At the end of this comic, Dazzler’s stalker clubs her over the head as she’s going to her own movie premier, kidnaps her, and then while she’s suffering from a severe concussion, he strips her down and dresses her in her old disco and roller skates costume while tying a… what is that… a nylon stocking? Tying a nylon stocking over her head? Then, Dazzler defeats him by exuding soothing light and we all have a good cry.

Hey, if only all stalker incidents could end this positively! (Uncanny X-Men #260 – Apr 1990)

#x-men #xmfbte #clare5 #uncannyxmen260 #dazzler #eric beale

[gaknar]

I don’t know what’s less believable. That someone so high on blow would have that kind of throwing star accuracy, or that someone so obsessed with Dazzler wouldn’t be humping one of those mannequins. Well maybe we’re supposed to assume he is humping them. Anyway, this is the continuation of Eric Beale’s story, who was some kind of Hollywood producer back in the Dazzler comic, and now he’s all nuts and he wants to kill her. Not a top grade X-Men villain by any means. (Uncanny X-Men #260 – Apr 1990)

#x-men #xmfbte #clare5 #uncannyxmen260 #eric beale #dazzler

[gaknar]

Jesus! I thought for a second that pilot was Cecilia Reyes, but apparently it’s some one off character with a similar sounding name that we’re never going to see again because she just got blown to fucking bits.

And hey look it’s the return of Fenris, the clothes negative, hand holding siblings that tried to kill Professor Xavier back in Uncanny X-Men #200. Where’ve they been?? Do they only try killing X-Men when they can do it from the deck of their Yacht? That way they don’t have to put any clothes on over their speedos and string bikinis. Because changing clothes means you have to stop holding hands. Probably. Anyway, the callousness with which the death of this pilot is treated is a little unnerving. Like, Banshee and Forge are just like, well, she’s certainly dead. She’s Thunderbird dead. We better bounce.

Do you feel no responsibility for the trail of bodies you leave in the wake of your globe trotting adventures together you maniacs! Geez stop taking public transportation for crying out loud. (Uncanny X-Men #260 – Apr 1990)

#x-men #xmfbte #clare5 #uncannyxmen260 #banshee #forge #cylla markham #fenris

[gaknar]

Look at this Trump insurrectionist. Assassination thwarted by low budget movie production. Just put on some clown makeup on lock yourself up you MAGA dipshit. Yes I am writing this right after the Capital riot. (Uncanny X-Men #260 – Apr 1990)

#x-men #xmfbte #clare5 #uncannyxmen260 #dazzler #eric beale