#tik tokker geralt

[bounce-a-coin-off-your-witcher]

lip synch your way into my heart pt. 2

(Part One Here)

@PrissCilla: Is this the guy that your Party City video was about?

The unfamiliar user has attached a picture to their message and Geralt’s eyes widen in happy surprise when he realizes that it is, in fact, Party City Guy. The picture of Party City Guy is a ridiculously adorable candid; he’s reclining in an oversized rainbow beanbag chair, a large textbook sitting on his lap and his lip nestled sweetly between his teeth. 

Geralt wants to know what it feels like to nip at that same soft skin. Gods he wants that so badly; ever since the brunette had turned around and flashed that blindingly sweet grin in the aisle of his workplace. The guy had clearly recognized him from the way he’d blushed and gone silent, somehow even cuter then than he had been when smiling a moment before. Geralt had barely paid attention to the brand of costume blood he’d grabbed from the shelf; he was too distracted by the blue-eyed beauty behind the checkout counter.

He replies to the photo-message quickly. Maybe too quickly.

@whitehairdontcare: Yeah. I didn’t catch his name, unfortunately. Are you roommates or something?

@PrissCilla: Yeah, he’s my roomie. I’ll give you his Tik Tok handle but only if you swear on your follower count that you’re actually interested in him as a person and not just as a way to pass the time. I don’t care if you’re internet famous, he’s my best friend and I don’t want to see him hurt.

@PrissCilla: Also he has a huge celebrity crush on you already so it’s barely fair.

@whitehairdontcare: I swear that I have nothing but honest intentions. I think I fell in like at first sight at his job the other day. My name is Geralt, btw.

@PrissCilla: Oh he’s gonna love that line if you ever use it. He’s a huge sap. 

@PrissCilla: Alright, I trust you Geralt. You can find him at @buttercup-bard. 

After that message she sends a gif of RuPaul saying “And DON’T fuck it up!” He smiles a bit at that. If this is what Party City’s friends are like then he must be the coolest person on the fucking planet. 

@whitehairdontcare: Why’d he pick that name?

@PrissCilla: Ask him, fam. Later.

Geralt’s eyes flicker back up to the picture. He saves it to his camera roll without hesitation; Party City just looks so sweet. He’s so focused and intent and- and Geralt wants to know what it would be like to have that kind of intensity focused on him. He wants to mirror it back. He’s never really been the type to hit on strangers but this guy has him all kinds of fucked up.

This guy is...different. Special. Perhaps, though Geralt has no real proof at this point, this guy might even be perfect. 

---

Two days later, on his way to class, Jaskier opens Tik Tok and starts to scroll his For You Page as usual. There are a few funny dances and a few skits that make him half-smile in amusement; it wastes the time between locations effectively. He’s nearly all the way to campus when he comes across the latest video that @whitehairdontcare has posted. He bites back a squeak when he reads the caption: “POV: You’re the cute cashier from Party City and your car breaks down after our first date.”

How did he know? How did he know that the car mechanic video was Jaskier’s favorite? Really, though, this couldn’t be about Jaskier. Not even possible. Inconceivable. No way.

Except.

Except that he also had a private message waiting for him. From @whitehairdontcare. 

Holy fucking shit. 

Jaskier’s eyes roll back into his head and he collapses off the seat of the bus, unconscious.

---

Forty-five minutes and one short walk later and Jaskier has a bag of ice pressed to the sizable goose-egg on his forehead. According to the two girls who’d sprinkled water on his face to wake him up (and then accompanied him to the campus Health and Safety building behind the library) he’d dropped his phone, crumpled to the floor “like a sad puppet” and slid forward when the bus driver hit the brakes, slamming his head into the support pole in the center of the aisle. 

There would be a definite bruise and probably a raised bump for at least a week and a half according to the nurse on call. 

It wasn’t until the taller girl handed his phone back to him that Jaskier realized he’d never even read Mr. White Hair’s private message before his embarrassing little accident. With one hand still holding the ice against his injury and the other trembling against his phone screen, the anxious young man unlocked the device and opened Tik Tok once again. He tapped on the private message and focused on each individual word:

@whitehairdontcare: Hey Party City Guy, my name is Geralt. 

There’s a selfie. The influencer is flashing the peace sign, his long white hair pulled back into a messy bun, one eye closed in a frozen wink. Jaskier’s fingers barely manage to type out a shocked reply.

@buttercup-bard: Hello, Geralt. I’m Jaskier. No offense but...why are you talking to me?

@whitehairdontcare: You seemed nice? You’re cute? I like your hair? Do you need more reason cause I have more reasons.

Jaskier is utterly floored. No only did the popular Tik Tokker reply immediately but he’d replied with those answers. The college senior takes a few deep breaths to steady himself before snapping a quick selfie, ice and all. At least his smile is still charming, he hopes.

@buttercup-bard: I’m probably not quite as cute as you remember rn. Oops.

@whitehairdontcare: What happened?? Are you okay?

@buttercup-bard: It’s embarrassing. Maybe another time.

@whitehairdontcare: Maybe you could tell me on our date? I promise I’m not creepy. You were just so nice the other day even tho you were nervous or whatever.

Jaskier knows that if he’s going to hyperventilate, this is probably the best place to do it. The nurse is still less than fifty feet away and should push come to shove she can probably revive his stupid ass. Instead, though, he focuses on every modern retelling of Cinderella he’s ever seen. 

Gods, he thinks, smiling absently down at his phone screen where Mr. Whit- where Geralt is grinning up at him with that wink and that peace sign. My version is going to be so much better.

@buttercup-bard: Yeah, alright. Maybe I’ll tell you about how your Tik Tok made me pass out on a public bus...on our date. 

#geraskier tik tok au #geraskier au #geraskier #geraskier ficlet #geraskier fic #geralt x jaskier #tik tokker geralt #influencer geralt #social media star geralt #party city employee jaskier #jaskier is living his best life #and geralt is too #chris flemings references to party city fuel this fic

[bounce-a-coin-off-your-witcher]

lip sync your way into my heart

( @thecomfortofoldstorries and I got into a fun head-cannon debate last night about Tik Tok POVs and this is what happened)

--- Jaskier has never really been in the loop when it comes to social media. He was behind the curve when he made his Tumblr and he was two years late to sign up for Twitter. It’s no surprise that he finally downloads Tik Tok and makes an account several months after it’s become a viral platform.

That also means all the good usernames are taken; Jaskier types in @buttercup-bard, sees that it’s available, and calls it a day. This isn’t an app he’s going to care about. It’s just to waste time during his forty minute commute to and from campus. 

Alas, he has ADHD...and this shit is addictive.

Especially, he hates to admit, the thirst-trap hotties who do weird, obscure, edgy POV videos. Jaskier knows they’re aimed primarily towards teen and young adult women but he’s a red-blooded Redanian gay. He’s horny. He can watch a few POV Tik Toks on the bus and thirst after pretty boys with big muscles...as a treat.

By Jaskier’s second week of classes he’s found a definite favorite Tik-Tokker (is that what they’re called? Or is it influencer? Jaskier doesn’t care). The guy is gorgeous. He has beautiful honey-gold eyes and long, silvery-white hair; which is appropriate since his handle is @whitehairdontcare. He makes a wide range of content, too. Perfect for Jaskier’s Concerta-focused tastes. There are some dances here and there and some Q&A videos, but for the most part he does POVs. 

Jask and his roommates, Essi and Priscilla, have spent many happy hours poring over Mr. White Hair’s account, watching and re-watching their favorites from his vast repertoire of content. Essi loves his weird, edgy-boi shit. Stuff with titles like “POV: I fight the bully who insulted your haircut” or “POV: you make a deal with the devil for true love”. Stuff that Jaskier would have been into when he still listened to My Chemical Romance on the regular (okay, he still does, but don’t tell Essie). 

Priscilla is a huge fan of Tik Tok dances. She follows every challenge and ranks her favorites, compiling them into a YouTube series that’s more for her self-gratification than anything else. Mr. White Hair is generally towards the top of her list whenever he deigns to follow a trend that doesn’t involve badly applied makeup blood smears. The guy clearly works out and the definition of his body (and the movements of said really hot body) make the dances look so much more fluid and fun. Jaskier and Priscilla clearly share a brain-cell when it comes to appreciating Mr. White Hair’s hotness.

Jaskier’s favorites, of course, are the cute little POVs that lie scattered between all the edgy ones. Stuff made for the softies of Tik Tok. Stuff made for boys like Jaskier. “POV: I fix your car for you” is the one he’s probably re-watched the most. Mr. White Hair is lying on his back beneath a jacked-up blue car, oil smeared in a few strategic places on his face, chest, and arms. At the very end of the Tik Tok he moves the wrench out of the way of his face completely and winks directly into the camera.

Jaskier hates to admit it, even to himself, but no matter how many times he’s watched that stupid twenty-give second video, that wink drops his heart straight down into his shoes and fills his stomach with butterflies.

---

“Hey do you guys carry fake blood here?” an almost terrifyingly deep voice asks from behind him. Jaskier twirls around on his heel, Retail Smile firmly in place, and loses his shit the moment he sets eyes on his latest customer.

It’s Mr. White Hair.

Here. In the middle of the aisle of the Party City where Jaskier works every weekend. He’s either going to throw up or pass out or both. 

He doesn’t though. Instead, the Demon Lord of Retail possesses his body momentarily and nods, “Right over this way!” He leads the insanely attractive influencer over to the year-round section of Halloween FX makeup and gestures towards the shelf filled with various fake blood capsules, bottles, and packets. 

“Thanks,” Mr. White hair smiles. Jaskier nods again, silent, and drifts back towards the counter in a daze. He’s the only one on shift right now (it is not a very busy Party City) and he knows that he can’t pass out on the dirty tile floor or he’ll get fired (and perhaps tetanus). He just needs to power through the next few minutes and then he can crouch next to the helium tank and freak the fuck out.

But not until Mr. White Hair is gone.

Just as Jaskier is re-learning how to breathe normally, the sexy internet star makes his way towards the counter with an armful of products and the retail worker loses it again. Thank god for the ability to compartmentalize.

“So, just these for you?”

“Yeah, thanks.”

“No problem! I love your Tik Toks by the way,” Jaskier replies automatically. His eyes widen slightly. Why the fuck did I mention his Tik Toks!?

“Thanks,” the guy says and blushes. “I didn’t know they’d gotten so popular.”

“You have like two million followers?” Jaskier laughs. “I think that makes you pretty popular. Maybe even famous.”

“Oh yeah...right.” 

“Anyway, your total is going to be twenty-one fifty.”

Mr. White Hair pays and Jaskier bags all his fake blood, wondering the whole time exactly what kind of content he can look forward to seeing. More of Essi’s edgy shit, apparently. As he’s handing the plastic bag over the counter, Jaskier smiles and works up the courage to ask, “Is your hair naturally white? I don’t mean to pry, it’s just really pretty.”

Geralt’s face goes slightly pinker than before and he nods. “Yeah. Weird genetic thing. Thanks.”

“No problem. Right on,” Jaskier beams. “Well, it was nice meeting a famous person. Thanks for stopping in.”

“Thanks for helping me out,” the Tik Tokker replies. Jaskier watches him exit the store before ripping his phone from his pocket and dialing Essi. He needs to talk to her before he spirals into a giddy panic attack.

---

“Hey Jask have you seen that hot guy’s latest Tik Tok?” Priscilla asks, lounging across her futon like a queen. Jaskier looks up from his copy of The Collective History of Aedirnian Funeral Dirges and wrinkles his eyebrows in confusion.

“No, why?”

“You should go check your phone. I think you’ll be happily surprised.”

“Oh-kay,” Jaskier says, drawing out the ‘kay’ for as long as it takes him to get up from his seat on the floor and exit the room. He retrieves his phone from the charger in the kitchen and returns to Priscilla’s bedside. He opens his new favorite app and pulls up @whitehairdontcare’s page. There’s a new POV from earlier this morning and Jaskier taps on it. 

His eyes go round when he reads the caption: “POV: You’re the cute cashier at the Party City and I’m bad at flirting”. 

Mr. White Hair is staring into the camera with those beautifully golden eyes, awkwardly rubbing at the back of his neck with his hand while he lip syncs to whatever song is playing. He’s wearing a tight, navy blue v-neck and Jaskier can see the movement of every one of his ridiculously defined muscles as they flex. The silver wolf’s-head necklace Mr. White Hair always wears around his neck is in its usual place, dangling down between those perfect collarbones…

Jaskier takes a shaky breath and glances up at his friends, who are staring back at him with wide eyes. “It could be about anyone.”

“How many Party Cities do you think he went to yesterday?”

“I’m not going to get my hopes up,” Jaskier snorts. “He’s a social media influencer and I am one semester away from finishing my degree and my thesis. Why would he ever want to be with someone like me?”

Essi rolls her eyes and Jaskier goes back to his homework. 

---

Later that night, alone in his room, Jaskier plugs his earbuds into his phone and watches the Tik Tok over and over. He finds the song Geralt used and adds it to his Work Is Tough playlist, which he’s allowed to play over the loudspeakers at the store so long as he’s working a solo shift. 

He watches Mr. White Hair’s plush pink lips move around the words and dreams of kissing them someday, as far-fetched as that scenario is (because this video is definitely not for him, that’s impossible):

“My hopes are so high that your kiss might kill me.

So won't you kill me, so I die happy.

My heart is yours to fill or burst, to break or bury,

or wear as jewelry; whichever you prefer.”

Fucking Dashboard Confessional. Of course. One of Jaskier’s favorite bands from his emo days in middle school. If this really was for Jaskier, if this really was a legitimate attempt at online flirtation by Mr. White Hair himself, it was working.

 Jaskier buries his head in his pillow and sighs. 

#geraskier fic #geraskier tik tok au #there will be a part 2 i promise #geraskier fanfic #geraskier #geraskier au #all I do is make aus all day and work retail #geraskier fluff #flirty geralt #influencer geralt #party city employee jaskier #college student jaskier #geraskier college au #geraskier alternate universe #oops I keep making cute shit