#this wasnt intended to be an analysis post this is a ‘he needs therapy but i like him better deprived of it’ post

[kohakhearts]

ive definitely said this before but i think there's this common (and understandable!!) misconception that goh is canonically a victim of bullying and tbh i thought the same thing when jn was still airing lol but now that i have gone back and obsessively rewatched every episode a million times i think it's a lot more interesting to consider what the anime shows us, which is...not a kid who is bullied, but a kid who simply has no friends. and it doesn't seem to be a matter of, like, other kids not liking him. even in the very first episode, we see chloe's classmates asking her about him. it's a very casual "oh yeah, he never really comes to school, does he?" like they don't even really think about him that much. but they say his name respectfully, and just seem mildly curious about it. not really like...mocking or anything like that.

i mean, his whole "i don't need friends" attitude when they're younger could stem from bullying. that's completely possible. but the anime never really goes out of its way to make us think that? like...his disengagement in the flashback in the drizzile evolution episode emphasizes that he's refusing to play with his classmates - and that he doesn't even know why. if he were being bullied by them...wouldn't he have been able to at least articulate that he doesn't like them or that they don't treat him well or that they're just no fun to play with? like i won't say that some bullied kids aren't really unwilling to talk about the experience of being bullied...but in hindsight, they usually have a solid idea of what was going on.

in goh's case, i think he's just like...maintaining what he knows, which is the experience of being isolated and alone. he takes control of that feeling by saying he doesn't need - or even want - friends. he's still doing that when he tells ash that he "accepts" him as his friend, as opposed to just...being like, nice to meet you :) and moving on. he needs to be the one who has that say (and in this respect, his whole w-well would you maybe...consider being MY friend too...?? in jn003 is actually kind of...sweet? and indicative of the change that ash has already begun to motivate in him! doubly so considering ash's response is "wait but weren't we friends already?" bc ash is someone who like...doesn't need that verbalization, and doesn't consider friendships as things you "give" and "take" or whatever. they just are!!!).

ANYWAY, all this to say like. i see where the idea comes from, because he does have those little "you're just like everybody else" lines and whatever, and like...his whole thing with horace - his awkwardness in social interactions, like this. overcompensation for something, this need to prove how Smart and Impressive he is (and his fear of being seen as stupid, like in the horace ep when he's like "oh haha...well...you tell me what you know about celebi first. obviously i know this stuff already. i'm just testing you" when he obviously doesn't know it). but to me that's like...a projection, if anything. he's so determined not to acknowledge that his parents' absence has made him lonely, has affected him in any way, that he twists himself into believing the reason he doesn't get along with others isn't because he's too used to being alone to deal with having friends...it's because they're not worth his time, or they're not good enough for him, or they're just going to hurt him anyway. something something pokemon journeys if goh had learned some dbt techniques

#taylor.txt #woe...personality disorder be upon ye #wait wheres the like up meme the highest honour i can bestow on a character with the bisexual scout badge #thats me but like. bpd #anyway uh YEAH maybe IM the one projecting but im so much more interested in a character who acts like everyone hates them than one who #actually IS hated by everyone. like there's something wrong in his brain that made him this way...so endearing <3 #*meta #goh #this wasnt intended to be an analysis post this is a ‘he needs therapy but i like him better deprived of it’ post #but glad it resounded with some of yall JDKSJDKDJSKDNSK