#they literally gave the textbook definitions of a little and a persecutor alter when they described what they'd observed

[sol1loqu1st]

.

#.... #....... #.......... #........... #.................. #think i have osdd #idk though. ive heard it can be one of those things that like... therapists can sometimes suggest to a patient & then the patient sorta #starts to see symptoms that arent really there? #but like...when my previous therapist suggested it it kind of made sense already. like it was a reasonable conclusion #but i did start to notice more symptoms and tbh my memory sucks balls esp when i'm upset. so i can't say for sure #if i was experiencing those symptoms previously #and honestly i dont really have much in the way of distinct childhood trauma. lots of low level trauma but i'm p sure it has to be like... #yeah #like...idk. i feel like it explains a lot in a way that most other stuff just... doesn't. #idk. ive thought i did in the past but mistook something else for alters and im scared im just. doing it again #but like. idk. this one feels a little more likely considering that like... while they never said the word 'osdd' they u #sure did talk a lot abt parts/switching/etc during our sessions and said they thought i probably had at least two other parts #and like... idk i think im at a disadvantage here bc i know terminology and definitions used in did/osdd/etc communities but like #they literally gave the textbook definitions of a little and a persecutor alter when they described what they'd observed #and its just. idk. honestly osdd has always sounded a little bullshit to me bc like #maybe not /everyone/ functions like that but i feel like most nd people or traumatized people or w/e at least experience some level of like #idk arguing with yourself in your brain?? a constant back and forth of 'i'm such a burden i need help on everything im sorry im sorry" and #'you manipulative piece of shit youre just burdening everyone more with all your bullshit traumadumping' etc etc etc #and isn't switching just. mood swings? #(this isnt me doubting the validity of the disorder i just feel like. maybe i just am terrible at regulating my emotions) #idk anyway i just. i really do think it fits. im just worried